Disclaimer: Yuugiou (Yu-Gi-Oh!, Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters) is the property of Takahashi Kazuki and respective publishers, including Shueisha, Studio Gallop, Nihon Ad Systems, Toei Animation, 4Kids, and others. I would never claim to own it or attempt to make money off of it- just think of this as a written, free doujinshi and hopefully we'll get along fine ;)
Note: While reading, please keep in mind that lovers in ancient Egypt would frequently refer to each other as brother and sister as a term of endearment, rather like saying 'my love' or 'my dearest'.
Vocabulary: Aibou is Atemu's name for Yuugi, meaning partner or companion. Usir (wsjr) is one of the modern transcriptions of Osiris's Egyptian name.
Sister to the Heart
My ancient sister resides within the House of Life,
Surrounded by rotting papyrus,
And she the only blossom.
He crossed his arms and frowned lightly as he looked over the sarcophagus, taking in the image, familiar though he couldn't remember its origins. Kohl lined over the mask's eyes…it was a nostalgic appearance to him, though he doubted it was anyone he knew. But even now the illusions that took hold when he was active in aibou's body painted kohl over his eyes, slanted them differently…
Three thousand years and the loss of his memory hadn't changed what he was- being amongst these artifacts felt rather like a homecoming of some kind. He felt as if all it would take to break the barriers and understand was to concentrate enough, immerse himself in shades.
"Pharaoh?"
Ishizu's voice was soft and regal, joining the trance seamlessly. She stepped into place beside him, and though he didn't turn he saw her features out of the corner of his eye. White linen, deep gold that shone against her dark skin and hair, all formed a general impression which he tried to catch hold of and examine. Beautiful, gentle but strong…
It slipped from his grasp like water would when cupped in one's hands, falling further away the harder he tried to grasp it. So he stopped, returning to the almost trance-like state.
They moved on to the next display, a papyrus behind a case of glass. The words were not meaningless to him, but close. Running a hand over the glass, he traced the symbols. "Ishizu, you can read Egyptian, can you not?"
Gold clinked lightly as Ishizu inclined her head. "Yes, Pharaoh. It is still spoken by my clan."
"Might you tell me what this document says?"
Ishizu took a step forwards, now close enough that he could feel her at his back, though they didn't touch. She was enough to the side that she could easily read over him…though apparently she didn't need to. Smiling very lightly, she closed her eyes. She spoke, her voice soft but strong, lilting tones that tugged at his memory yet eluded him.
As he listened his eyes lingered over both her reflection and the papyrus. He began to focus more on Ishizu, unable to make a clear connection between the spoken and written words. She was graceful and strong, holding herself like a queen…or perhaps the greatest of priestesses.
Kohl enhancing the elegant lines of her eyes, gold shining against her bronze skin…Ishizu was, he knew instinctively, the very image of beauty among his people…their people. Standing here with her, hearing these ancient words, he felt as if he had regained another part of his identity, though his memories were no closer to being discovered. Perhaps this was what it was like to have kin, though of spirit and customs rather than blood.
When the recitation ended, she opened her eyes and looked over the document. She began to speak again in Japanese, more slowly this time. "Homage to thee, Usir, Lord of eternity, King of the gods, whose names are manifold,whose transformations are sublime, whose form is hidden in the temples, whose Kaa is holy..."
Now he closed his eyes, doing his best to focus on the words spoken and commit as much to memory as possible. It was simply history to the modern world, but it was his heritage, one of the multitudes of details lost to time which he sought to regain.
When the translation was through, Ishizu said, "The Hymn to Usir, who is named Osiris by the Greeks. Modern scholars compile it as a part of The Book of the Dead."
He turned around and smiled up at her. "Thank you, Ishizu."
Eyes lightening, mouth softening though she did not smile, Ishizu inclined her head in response. "It was no trouble, Pharaoh."
It wasn't long before the museum's closing forced him to leave, but Ishizu's face remained in his mind, along with the memory of a new link to his past discovered.
The veil of night spreads around us,
Barely noticeable in this stale temple,
Where the only pomegranates are those painted in stone.
Tonight he felt even more at home in the museum, surrounded by dead things and lost memories. But there was life as well, a single point of growth and sweetness amongst the decay. Footsteps sounded, and he saw Ishizu appear, reflected in glass. Smiling, he turned to greet her. "Ishizu. Good evening."
Ishizu came to a stop a short distance from him and inclined her head, placing a hand over the Tauk. "Pharaoh. I have been expecting you."
"Oh? Did the Tauk tell you, or am I just that predictable?" He cocked his head and raised an eyebrow, grinning at her.
"To one using the Tauk, everyone becomes predictable," Ishizu said. Her tone was soft and serious, but her words and eyes tipped him off, and he chuckled in response.
"I wonder, would that make things boring or simply relieving?"
"It largely depends on the circumstances. And of course one might see a terrible future and know of no way to divert it," Ishizu said, lowering her head and looking to the floor, her expression turning somber. She shook her head lightly and turned her gaze to the display he had been examining before her arrival. "You are interested in seals, Pharaoh?"
Ishizu was already regaining her earlier animation, and so he allowed the line of conversation to be changed, for now pushing aside curiosity and concern. "Aa. I was reading the information on them here, and started wondering if I'd once had one."
"Undoubtedly, but whatever calamity lost you your name probably necessitated the destruction of your seals."
He smiled wryly. "It would be too much to hope for such a simple solution to present itself. Hmm…I wonder, was there some sort of magic involved? To systematically destroy all of my cartouches must have been some task."
"It's possible. There are so many places a name would be recorded, and it is certain that your name was not simply lost to time. It would be especially difficult to trace all of the letters that might have remained with foreign rulers. A spell over the name, perhaps the cartouche itself…" Ishizu looked intrigued. "Very possible. There is a spiritual significance ascribed to the name which might be the key…"
"Is that so?" He looked down at the Puzzle and tapped it idly. "If we had the time it might be an interesting experiment, though probably not a readily useful one. A shame."
They moved on, the next display they paused at for any great length of time being that of a mummified cat. He looked it over, frowning. "Is the body damaged?"
Ishizu stepped closer to the glass and examined it. "It appears so."
"I wonder what caused it…"
"There are many possible causes. Tomb robbers, though I would expect them to be less interested in the simple amulets wrapped with a pet's body, perhaps damage to the body before the mummification process was begun, damage within the process, or poor treatment by the archeologists who discovered it or the museum which first took it in."
While the impressions were vague, he did feel a distinct sense of disapproval at the thought of scholars being at blame for such mistreatment. "Is their first pursuit not the search for knowledge? If they're going to invade our tombs in the first place, one would think the least they could do is treat them with respect."
Ishizu sighed lightly. "Unfortunately that is not always the case. In earlier years it wasn't common for museum's to rip jewelry straight off the body like a tomb robber, more concerned with its wealth than respecting the dead. Even nowadays…scientists have put Tutankhamun-ou's body through many tests in attempt to discover the reason for his death." Her voice was strong, a hint of anger bleeding through.
He didn't need full knowledge of his people's funerary practices to feel his own outrage at this information. "It must be difficult for you, working with archeologists."
"I am mostly reconciled to it," Ishizu said, shaking her head. "At least now most scholars are more concerned for the preservation of history over riches. There are a decent number in Egypt who would prefer to leave the artifacts within their tombs, but archeology has become a matter of political argument nowadays. Foreign countries, for instance, are generally reluctant to return to Egypt the artifacts which their own archeologists discovered."
Acting on impulse, he took her hand and smiled in sympathy. "I certainly don't envy you such a job, though I may envy your knowledge of my people."
Ishizu blushed slightly. "Your memories will be regained, Pharaoh- they aren't to be mourned forever."
"True." His heart sped up a little as he looked up at her, their hands joined, and when he felt himself flushing a little he coughed and released her hand gently. What had that been? …He flushed doubly as he recognized the sensation, and turned his head aside in embarrassment, waiting for it to fade.
But while his blush faded, the sensation never fully did, and as they continued through the exhibit, he found his gaze on Ishizu redoubled, sights of gold, deeply lined eyes, and a long sweep of hair brushed over a strong forehead being committed to memory.
If only I could take flight and search as the falcon does,
I would meet again with my elusive sister.
"Ishtar Ishizu. Do you know where she is today?"
The director of the museum looked down on him and frowned, as if his presence was somehow offensive. "No, I can't say that I do. Why is it that you need to see her, anyway?"
"She's a friend," he replied.
The man raised his brows. "Is that so? And your name is?"
He bit down on the temptation to reply, 'the Nameless Pharaoh'. "Mutou Yuugi."
The disapproving expression vanished. "You must be Mutou Sugoroku's grandson, then?" When he nodded, the director smiled. "Ah! I should have recognized you when I saw that necklace of yours- didn't you lend it to the museum for a display a while back? I wasn't working here then, but I've seen pictures…"
"Ishizu is?" he gently interrupted, trying to prod the conversation back into the right lines.
"Oh, yes. I'm sorry, but I'm not really sure where Ishtar-san went. She told me that she wouldn't be here for the next few days."
Perhaps she was competing in Battle City as well? It made more sense than any other reason he could think of for a prolonged absence, and the days coincided with the tournament. He thanked the director and left, sighing. Given the size of the city, there wasn't a very high chance of running into her. Still, he kept an eye out for her as he made his way to the plaza where the tournament would begin. He knew he was going slowly, but there was time yet, and he was curious.
As he was passing a small park he saw a flash of white and gold out of the corner of his eye, and smiled when he turned. Ishizu was sitting on a bench within the park, a Duel Disk in her lap and a hand on the Tauk. "Ishizu. I should have known you wouldn't need to be there for Kaiba's announcement," he said, voice teasing, as he approached her.
Ishizu inclined her head. "Pharaoh."
"May I join you for a time?" When Ishizu gave permission, he sat down by her, twisting in the seat a little so that he could look at her rather than the park's scenery. "When I heard you would be absent from the museum for a few days I'd wondered if you were entering the tournament. I wouldn't have expected it to be part of the reason you came to Japan."
"I too have a task I must complete," Ishizu said, gazing down at her Duel Disk, an expression on her face which he would have called melancholy if forced to put a name to it, though it didn't entirely fit. She didn't look comfortable with offering any more information, so he decided to do so instead.
"I haven't yet told aibou why I desired to enter Battle City. When I recover my memories, my soul will be able to pass on. Aibou will understand, but I would rather that he not spend all of our days together looking to my death and dreading it. He'll find out soon enough- I'd like for him to have at least this much time with a mind untainted by such thoughts."
"Pharaoh…" Ishizu hesitated, and then placed a hand over his. "There is one place all souls must return to. No matter how long the wait, those who care for each other will always be reunited in the end." She smiled very slightly, her expression warm. "When the time comes, please tell Yuugi this."
"Ishizu…thank you." The knowledge was another thing which, like the pieces of information she had told him in the museum, settled into him easily, as if it had only been waiting to be heard. He looked up at her in wonder, and almost subconsciously shifted his hand so that he could lace his fingers with hers. This was the first time he had seen her smile, and there was something very affecting about it. He found himself wishing to see her smile with happiness, and wondered what it would take.
"Oh! Pharaoh, the tournament will be starting soon," Ishizu said, a hand flying to the Tauk. "I apologize for keeping you so long."
He shook his head and smiled. "Don't. Thank you for the advice, Ishizu." He paused, and then asked, "I suppose I'll only see you again at the semi-finals?"
Ishizu in turn hesitated, but then replied, "I will be at the museum tonight, if you wish to speak with me."
His smile brightened, and his grip on Ishizu's hand tightened for a moment before he released it and rose from the bench. "I look forward to our next meeting."
My sister's visage is that of a falcon, and she torments me,
Wheeling in the sky just out of reach,
Hiding her heart within bright flames.
This time Ishizu was at the museum before him, down in the basement and looking on the tablet which depicted the God Cards and his battle with the priest resembling Kaiba. She clasped the Tauk tightly, and as he grew closer he saw that she was tense, her expression troubled.
When he spoke her name she actually jolted, and spun around to face him with a strange hint of guilt in her eyes. Her voice held a sliver of unease as well, not fully hidden by her calm tone. "Pharaoh, good evening."
He nodded to her and smiled. "Ishizu. I trust that your duels went well?"
"Yes, they did. I am closer to my goal now."
The hints of sadness he had seen during their earlier meeting were showing through again, and he wondered if it would be worth asking. Ishizu had been recalcitrant before, and he respected her desire for privacy, but…this new enemy who had presented himself, who Ishizu had warned him of…he had to wonder if she was connected to him somehow.
"Ishizu, what is your goal, your reason for coming here and joining Battle City? I'm sure that it isn't just to help me regain my memories."
She shook her head and cast her gaze downwards, her eyes distant. "No, it isn't. But Pharaoh, I have been honest in what I have told you, and I swear that I will explain my past to you when the time comes."
"That isn't what I…" He sighed. "I trust your word, Ishizu. I ask because I am worried for you and the burden you carry."
Ishizu looked up now and smiled at him. "Thank you, Pharaoh. But the time is not yet right. I have foreseen it, and it will not be long." She placed a hand over the Tauk as she often did, the gesture seeming to help restore the quiet confidence she held herself with.
Apparently that line of conversation was over, and soon they began their walk through the exhibit again. Ishizu's countenance lightened as she explained arcane bits of history to him, with a reverent voice speaking scriptures of a dead language, still living on her tongue. She smiled little, but became freer of motion, making graceful gestures with her arms and even letting a hand toy with one of her golden tails of hair for a moment.
It was bolstering, to know that he could help her gain some contentment, but it was not enough. He wanted to know what troubled her, what drove her, and not out of simple curiosity- he wished to hear her grievances and help her through them. With that, knowledge rose in him, sharp and clear as the gaze of a bird of prey. He loved Ishizu…but she hid her heart from him, and he did not know how to break through to it.
So for now he simply did what he could, joking lightly and smiling up at her as he asked after more information, coaxing out what little happiness Ishizu was able to feel through her burden. He would keep trying, but it was the best he could offer at the moment, and he had to hope it would suffice.
My sister hides her form behind veils,
But a falcon will always find his mate.
An array of cards was laid out before them, both their chosen deck and the leftovers that currently couldn't find a place in it. The real work was done, but it was always good to review. However, it wasn't long before he found his thoughts wandering, taking the form of both speculation and fantasy… He was rather glad that aibou couldn't see them, though it made little difference when they shared a body.
"Other Me, there's still time to find her," aibou said, and his attention snapped back to where it belonged. Apparently he was being even more transparent than he had thought.
"Apologies, aibou. I hadn't meant to be so distracted."
Aibou shook his head and smiled. "It's all right, you know- I understand. You like Ishizu-san."
How in the world a spirit's form could flush he didn't know, but he did. "Aibou!"
Aibou ducked his head, failing to hide his amused expression. Busying his hands with the work of reforming their deck, he said, "You're actually kind of obvious about it…if anyone else was ever around to see the way you mooned over Ishizu-san you'd be teased mercilessly."
"Teased mercilessly?" he repeated, grinning and raising a brow. It didn't really seem fitting…then he thought of Jii-chan and chuckled. Jounouchi-kun and Honda-kun as well were unlikely to be very forgiving if he made a fool of himself. "Hmm…the victory is yours, aibou."
"Can I claim a few minutes of peace as my prize?" With that aibou transferred control of his body, winking as he vanished into his heart's room. He couldn't help but chuckle. Aibou might complain about his other self being a busybody, but he wasn't much better, only a bit more covert in his efforts.
So he set out, determined to find Ishizu, even if he had no clear idea of where she might be. All he knew was that she was here on the blimp- her determination would not allow anything else.
As before when searching for her in the streets, a flash of gold caught his attention, this time just turning a corner. Hurrying after it, he caught up and saw her turn to meet him.
Ishizu was dressed differently now, in some ways more brightly but in others more reserved than ever. Her dress clung to her form, arms left bare and calves flashing through the low slit. But then there was her headdress and veil, hiding all but her eyes. It lent her a different kind of mystique, making him wonder what led her to conceal her features in such a manner. Her eyes were the only hint afforded to him, and they were somber, a small hint of surprise showing as she looked down at him.
He smiled brightly, hoping to ease some of the heavy feelings already forming around them. "Ishizu. I'm glad to see you again."
"And I you, Pharaoh. But it is almost time for the first duel to be announced, and I doubt that your absence would be looked on well."
"Oh, Kaiba won't disqualify me," he said, grinning and knowing that affection colored his voice. "He'll be sternly rude and tell me that he's only overlooking my absence because he wants to duel me, or because I have a God Card…I'm not quite sure which is more important to him at this stage."
The veil prevented him from telling for sure, but he thought that Ishizu might have smiled. Her eyes did at least lighten slightly, and he counted that as victory enough. "Pharaoh, your duel will be the first. I would not keep you from it."
So his time was already up, then. He nodded and took one last look at Ishizu before going on his way. "I hope to see you again soon."
My heart aches like a wound's mouth,
For I have wronged my sister's family,
And wish redemption for an unforgivable sin.
He was hesitant for the first time as he made his way to meet Ishizu, wondering every few moments if he should just give up and head back. Certainly his presence wouldn't do her any good…
Sighing, he stopped. Throughout their meetings he had been happy in her company, felt a kindred spirit in her, and tried his best to draw her out of her somber moods and help her enjoy herself. But it was all in vain, wasn't it? How could he have the right to make her happy when he was the one to cause her suffering in the first place?
"Pharaoh?"
He jolted and turned around to face Ishizu, who gazed at him steadily, eyes somber but blameless. Resentment burned in him, all self-directed, and he inclined his head towards her. "Ishizu. Is there something you require of me?"
Ishizu's eyes widened for a scant moment, and surprise colored her voice, as if he had somehow confounded her expectations. "Nothing, Pharaoh. However…is there something the matter?"
She was looking at him so earnestly, reserved and concealed but honest in what she did show…she had always done so, and it was now more of a mystery to him than ever, one that bit at him with sharpened fangs. And so with even such a thin invitation the words were pulled from him, his will insignificant in their need to be spoken. "Ishizu, why do you not desire revenge as well? I know I would in your position. Your family has been wronged greatly because of me…you have every right."
"It is the Tomb Keeper's fate to serve the Nameless Pharaoh and guide him upon his resurrection. I understand and accept it," Ishizu said, and her voice was more distant than it had ever been, far more so than on the night he had unsuccessfully attempted to ask after her origins.
"But you did not choose it. Ishizu, would you have chosen such a terrible fate for yourself, given a chance?"
Pain was showing behind Ishizu's reserve now, giving him some inkling as to her true feelings. She did resent this, though she might never acknowledge it. Determined now, he took a step towards her. "Your family does not deserve such suffering, and I am to blame for it. Your younger brother had every right to fight for revenge, and you have every right to despise me." The thought was a terrible one, but no less than the truth, and he wouldn't shy away from it due to his own desires, insignificant in the face of the wrongs he had brought about.
"Pharaoh, that is not-"
But Ishizu's voice was weak, and he spoke over it, uncaring of the rudeness of the action. This was far more important. "I have harmed many people since I met aibou, and not always justly. Those who tried to harm him would receive punishments disproportionate to their crimes… But I am less mad now. I acknowledge my wrongs and accept responsibility for the suffering which I have caused. I will always do so, Ishizu." He looked up at her steadily, and took her hand to hold between his, not as any romantic gesture but firmly, trying to show her his conviction in every way possible. "I swear to you that I will return your younger brother from the darkness which holds him."
Oddly enough, Ishizu smiled at him, showing some of the hope which had been present after her duel with Kaiba. "Thank you, Pharaoh. I have faith in your will."
He released her hand, and stared after her as she walked away, wondering how she had managed to instill hope in him again with such simple words.
I draw life from seeing my sister's smile,
Joyful at last as she stands reunited with her family.
Ishizu smiled at him as they moved away from the group for a word alone, glowing with happiness as she had since Malik's return. It was an amazing difference, her joy making her appear the young woman she truly was.
He couldn't help but smile back, drawing happiness from hers, but still he maintained a distance between them, where before he would have come closer. "Ishizu, what do you wish to tell me?"
"Pharaoh, thank you for saving Malik."
He shook his head, darker feelings creeping in on the joy. "No. I don't deserve thanks for righting a wrong, especially not one which came about because of me in the first place." Sighing, he looked out to the sea, waters and horizon turned a deep red like pomegranates by the setting sun. Or perhaps fire…it was a more fitting image, certainly.
Ishizu stepped closer to him so that they stood side by side, their shoulders and arms brushing. His breath caught, cold shock and then warmth filling the areas she touched. And then Ishizu's hand brushed his, taking it into the lightest of holds. "I admit to being…conflicted, Pharaoh. But you fought to save my younger brother; though he had made himself your enemy, and despite the harm he had done you and your friends. You looked past that and helped to bring my family together again. I must thank you for that."
Turning his head and looking up at Ishizu, he felt hope rekindling again. He didn't deserve her thanks or the forgiveness he still wished for, but he had done this for her, brought joy back into her life, and he could draw his own from seeing her like this.
He ran his thumb over her hand lightly, savoring the warmth of her touch, before moving it from her weak grip and stepping away. Ishizu nodded to him before returning to her siblings and boarding the boat, and soon she was gone, returned to the land which held both of their pasts.
I am a king with no memories,
My seal-ring buried beneath the sands in a distant land,
Where my sister prepares the funeral for my return.
He was closer now than ever, literally only a short journey away from the recovery of his memories. He would probably be dead soon, and he didn't, couldn't regret that, but he could regret the words which lay unspoken between himself and Ishizu. This was the first time he had seen her in months, and would probably be the last- he should be making the most of it, not allowing pain to weigh them down even more than it had before.
Conflicted was the best word to describe Ishizu, as she had described herself before her departure from Japan. While he would rather see her happy, he tended to think that it was an improvement on her earlier disregard for the wrongs done to her. Perhaps now she was at least viewing her clan's tragedy as a crime against them rather than a duty they somehow…deserved.
But it separated them as well, created a barrier he didn't know how to breach. At the airport Ishizu had been more reserved than she ever had before around him, and so he had held back the desire to ask if he might ride with her on the way to the tablet's grounds.
It was strange in a way, to think of the woman he loved making arrangements for his death, but no stranger than the knowledge of his partner and friends standing by him in this, steadfast though they surely must recognize what would come once he regained his memories. It was also a somewhat strange thing to be grateful for, but he had had plenty of time to accustom himself.
We journey now to my funeral grounds,
And my heart, losing hope and the right to hope,
Is reflected in the river gone empty.
At first Atemu paced, indecisive, but after a short time he steeled himself and went forwards. Perhaps he shouldn't, but this was the last time he would be able to speak with Ishizu in this life…he should take the opportunity.
It seemed he had caught Ishizu just as she was readying for bed- she was without her headdress, and when she let him into her room he saw a hairbrush on one of the side tables. He sat down in a chair opposing the one Ishizu chose, and worked to curb his stare. With her hair uncovered Ishizu looked very different, almost exposed, and though he was entranced by the vision she made, it felt somehow wrong for him to be seeing her like this.
"I saw your past self in the World of Memory," he broached, trying and failing to sound casual. It had been a long time since he had last been able to be so around Ishizu, and the subject did not help matters.
"Is that so?" Ishizu looked somewhat surprised. Had she not expected to have roots in the past? Atemu smiled a little- her presence was one of the few things which he had anticipated.
"Yes. Your name was Aishisu…You wore a headdress bearing the head of a golden falcon, and you bore the Sennen Tauk. A vision of yours saved my life just a few minutes into the World of Memory. And it was you who found me when I had been separated from the court, searching through your Kaa, Supiria. She took the form of a blue woman, with a figure not so different from yours…much longer hair, though, and pale wings." He smiled wistfully. "You were beautiful."
Ishizu simply inclined her head in response, appearing uncomfortable at his words. He was pushing, wasn't he?
Atemu sighed. "Apologies. It grows late, and I should leave you to your rest." He rose and went to open the door.
"Pharaoh!" Ishizu's voice stopped him, and turning back around, he saw her hesitation. "While in the World of Memory…did you see any signs of my clan?"
Atemu's breath caught, and his eyes widened as he looked at Ishizu, who then stepped back, her air reminiscent of boughs in the wind. He tried to be steady in turn, and not give in to the weakness and nerves he felt lapping beneath the surface. "Either way, I am responsible for their suffering. My answer will not change anything."
Ishizu straightened now, and her eyes captured his. "It still matters, Pharaoh."
It matters to me. The words hid behind her spoken statement, evoking hope in him though he tried to avoid it. "Within the World of Memory there was no clan of Tomb Keepers."
Ishizu closed her eyes and sighed heavily, and if she had been blowing boughs before, now she was sagging, energy drained. A moment later she straightened again, covering her weakness with a thin veneer of strength, and he sighed. Didn't she understand by now that he wanted to be allowed to support her?
The thought pained him, as he realized that he would not be able to do so. Perhaps Ishizu was right, then, to avoid any reliance on someone who could not remain with her…but even so, he wished to do all he could for her while he was still here.
For a moment he closed his eyes, suffocating under the feeling. "I've wished to be someone you could rely on, Ishizu…but I've failed at that, haven't I? A dead man cannot support anyone."
"Pharaoh…"
Atemu shook his head, and wished he could snatch the words back. He kept doing wrongly by Ishizu…her family had been forced into darkness and tragedy in his name, and now he tried to offer her his heart, when clearly she wasn't willing to accept. Even if she did, it was cruel to ask her to accept his feelings when he would not be able to remain with her.
Opening his eyes, he took one last look at Ishizu, graceful and wise beauty, strong even when he'd caused such awful insecurity in her… He bowed his head. "I am sorry, Ishizu."
With that he turned and opened the door, stepping through it and taking his leave. There was still this night, but already he felt closer to death…and further from Ishizu, for he would never speak with her like this again.
I left my sister on the opposite bank,
Far more than floodwaters and river-horses separating us,
And I must remain content that she names me her brother.
As Atemu dueled aibou he remained focused, not allowing his thoughts or sight to stray. There was only this moment, his partner and the battle between them. He knew that none save the Ishtars wanted him to leave, but he couldn't let that hold him back.
There is one place all souls must return to…
He fought with all his strength, but there was nothing to fight for anymore, no one who truly needed him and no life ahead of him. His duty had been fulfilled, his battle over and his soul ready to be laid to rest. And so he lost, and the doorway began to open.
Saying his farewells, he determinedly kept his gaze from straying to her, refused to let his bearing betray him. Seeing the feelings which he knew were burning beneath the surface would only make it harder for aibou and his friends- it would be a disservice to let his hesitance and pain show through. He owed them more than that…and he owed Ishizu more than that.
Finally he turned to the doorway and made his way towards it, the passing on he had been waiting on for so long.
"Please wait," Ishizu said quietly, her voice right behind him.
Atemu stopped abruptly and turned back, feeling strangely blank, as if his heart wasn't sure which of his chaotic emotions was appropriate in response. He looked up at Ishizu, unable to help taking her features in. She looked…not glad, nor quietly confident as she sometimes did, but certain all the same.
Her eyes were somber, but lightened as she took his hand. "It does still matter, Pharaoh. It makes all the difference."
At those words his breath caught, and he felt hope which he thought he had felled rising in him. "Ishizu…"
Ishizu nodded, smiling gently despite the tears forming in her eyes. Her other hand joined the first, and both pressed down, their warmth becoming all that he felt besides the racing of his heart and her gaze on him. He wondered if her heart was racing as well. It seemed that it should, but if it did her voice betrayed none of it.
Ishizu's smile brightened even as a trail of tears formed, and she clutched his hand tightly for another moment before releasing it and stepping back. "Farewell, brother. I will meet with you again someday."
His throat tightened, one of those few times he felt tears threatening. But even so he smiled, and could feel the sharp joy rising in him and shining through along with the sadness. "Sister," he said simply, savoring the word she had given him the right to speak, and nodded to her before turning back again and taking those final steps through the doorway.
Light washed over him, and he felt his form returning to its true appearance. The doors began to close, and he continued on his way home. They were separated now by worlds and many years…but she named him her brother, and that was enough to fill Atemu with joy.
AN:
The quote, 'There is one place all souls must return to,' is based on Ishizu's line in episode 201: 'Dare no tamashii ni mo kaerubeki basho ga aru'.
Unfortunately I'm not sure how well it came across, but it is meant to be implied at the end that the poems have been written by Atemu after his death. I did my best to draw the imagery from the ancient Egyptian poetry which I've read, though the discussion of death and mourning does automatically mark it out- I've yet to see an ancient Egyptian love poem which wasn't happy.
I forgot before to cite the translation of the Hymn to Osiris I quoted before, and as I can't at the moment find the version I quoted, I've changed it to one I can attribute: the translation by E. A. Wallis Budge. The differences between the two versions are minimal, though.