I'm not making fun at you, so please don't flame me down. I just collected something that, in my opinion, shouldn't go into a Titanic fanfic all together. I repeat, all together.
Okay guys, this will be about historical Titanic fanfiction, not movie-based one.
Okay guys, this will be about historical Titanic fanfiction, not movie-based one. Writing those is easy: Jack and Rose fluff all the way and it'll be fine, unless you exaggerate with the pink candy clouds, but that's another subject as I have said.
So, you see the movie and fall in love with insert officer's name here, and think up some random 16 or 17 year-old girl (stick with the age!), name her something like Amethyst Viola ShiningStar (specify in the summary that she's not a Mary-Sue) and place her on the Titanic with some boring evil restrictive parents named with old-sounding names such as Hank and Marge (don't bother about the second name ShiningStar, they're probably named Smith or stuff like that, Amethyst Viola picked the beautiful name by herself), who won't let her out after 10 o'clock to flirt with insert officer's name here. Or even better, Amethyst Viola is travelling alone! And in first class, of course, wearing tight clothes and her long hair is flowing down her back (don't bother about the historical research which will undoubtedly tell you she looks like a prostitute in 1912). Now that we're talking about her appearance, her hair is always long and is either shining gold or cherry red or ebony black, her eyes are usually some shining emerald green and her figure is slim but not skinny with a tiny waist, blah blah, anyway she has to capture insert officer's name here's gaze immediately. Once again forget about the historical research, like that the officers weren't allowed to get too intimate with first-class ladies. So, insert officer's name here and Amethyst Viola are sweetly and slowly falling for each other, but she is either too embarrassed or is kept back by the evil restrictive parents, so at least 12 chapters are spent with grey angst and pink fluff, without anything of importance happening between her and insert officer's name here. At this point, however, Amethyst Viola should definitely attempt suicide for some irrelevant reason, but of course insert officer's name here is there ready to save her, and finally he... OMG! A CLIFFY! takes her hand!! Oh, the warmth of his body, aaah, pink fluff, 2 or 3 chapters, you know the rant. The two start getting closer (it's about time, the ship will sink in, like less than 2 days from there!!), and finally, on the night of the sinking, they... OMG! A CLIFFY! ...kiss!!
Beautiful.
Right here you realize there's not much time left, and insert officer's name here immediately takes Amethyst Viola up to his quarters and you decide to change your story's rating to M. The other officers cover for them, of course. Please, omit that stupid historical research, I mean, truly, who cares if insert officer's name here was more than 20 years older than your Amethyst Viola/was married with children/was on watch that night? And if it was so?! Amethyst Viola is so gorgeous that insert officer's name here, in your story, is barely 20 and has no girlfriend/wife!!
But... OMG! A CLIFFY! The ship is sinking (make her exit his quarters before the iceberg hits), and you must fill 10 chapters with inner turmoil, but obviously she is saved and angsts all night long about him in the lifeboat.
Option 1: insert officer's name here dies. OH THE DRAMA! Crying, angst, whatever, but, in the midst of the sinking, while he, as a hero, was busy saving other people, he somehow found pen and waterproof paper to write her a very short farewell note of 4 or 5 pages in which he tells her about his everlasting love. She cries and angsts for 10 more chapters, then decides life must go on.
Option 2: insert officer's name here survives! They marry and live happily ever after. Write a sequel of another 50 chapters, please!
Option 3: insert officer's name here dies, but once again, forget about that useless historical research and go for option 2!
- Pretty fanfic, isn't it?