I'm not going to write out the whole year, and I'm not sure if I will even write out the wedding. But from some of the reviews I got, I found the inspiration to write this, and a few other tidbits, so I will see where it takes me and what it leads to.

It was gut retching painful to watch him as she sang the song. To see the glisten of tears on his checks. It was like a punch in the stomach to know that she had done this to him. She knew she couldn't look at him, she needed to sing the song, she needed to get it out of her, she needed him to hear her. She pressed the headphones tighter to her ears, turning away from him. But his imagine seemed to be burned in her memory, she could still make out every detail of his face in her mind. She had hurt him, and she hadn't meant to. She had every intention of having a life with him, being a rock star with him. But her words spoke for her. He wasn't enough for her, he never had been. And this song was all that she was able to give him now, she knew how cliché is was, to tell him that it was her, not him, but in this case it was the truth. He had been perfect, it had been her that couldn't commit, she wasn't able too.

I'm sorry if this hurts you,
but I tried to keep what we had once, I was wrong
it wasn't keeping me awake,
you didn't listen, you didn't listen
you didn't hear me, you didn't hear me
when I said I want more I got no more,
you weren't stealing me away.

It's not enough
it's not enough to give me what it is I want
it's not enough
it's not enough to get me everything I need
And I wish it was
I think its time to give this up.

Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
ohhh
All the memories that we're losing
all the time that I spent with you everyday
I think it's running down the drain
I'm feeling that we're fading
don't make this as hard as you think it would be
it's a lot easier than it seems yeah

It's not enough
it's not enough to get me what it is I want
it's not enough
it's not enough to get me everything I need
and I wish it was
I think it's time to give this up.

And I can feel were falling down
slowly slowly
I can see us starting to drown
Can't stop it now
I can see we're burning out
so show me show me
how you gonna turn it around?
because

It's not enough
it's not enough to give me what it is I want
it's not enough
it's not enough to get me everything I need
It's not enough
it's not enough to give me what it is I want
it's not enough it's not enough to get me everything I need
and I wish it was
I think it's time to give this up.
It's not enough
it's not enough to give me what it is I want
it's not enough
it's not enough to get me everything I need
It's not enough
it's not enough to give me what it is I want
it's not enough
it's not enough to get me everything I need*

As the music ended she could feel her own tears rolling down her cheeks, splashing onto her unsteady hands, making her throat feel tight, holding the cry in.

"That was good Jude." Luke's voice filled the booth. "Why don't you take a moment?"

She didn't need to see the sympathy on his face to hear it in his voice. She headed for the door, she would give anything to not be seen by anyone else, she hated it when people saw her cry. With her head down she headed for the bathroom, the one place she knew she could hide from the rest of the label.

She looked at herself in the mirror, wiping the tears off and fixing her makeup. It took her a few moment to calm down, a few deep breaths. She pulled her phone out of her back pocket, and quickly hit number three on her speed dial. She knew that she could get his voicemail, it was what wanted.

"You've reached my cell, leave me a message and I'll get back to you when I have a chance." His voice was more professional than she remembered.

"Hey, sorry for calling so early." She said softly. She wished that his message was longer, those few seconds of listening weren't enough. "Don't call me back, I just needed to hear your voice." She ended the call just as quickly as she had started it. Even though those few seconds, words that she had heard weren't enough, they were what she needed. She knew that she could do this, and she smiled as she looked at the twist tie on her finger.

As she walked back towards the studio she was working in, she could see him leaving, the pain still visible on his face. She felt her heart ache for him, for them and what they had been. When she returned from Toronto three weeks ago she had explained to him that there break up wasn't going to change, and he had shoved a picture of her and Tommy at the airport in her face. There was nothing she could do to express how sorry she was for hurting him, not simple because she didn't have the words at the time, but because he still wouldn't listen to her. And that is why she had written the song. David had assured her that it was good, good enough for her album, and that is why she had sang it, to finally have him hear her words.

She stood back in front of the microphone and nodded her head and Luke, slipping the headphones back on.

"You ready?" he asked.

"Yeah." Jude smiled, she was ready.

*Avril Lavigne Not Engouh