The Night of the Screaming Mimi

"AAAAHHHHH!"

James West woke with a start. Did he just hear a scream? At 4:10 in the morning?

"AAAHHHH! JIIIIIM!"

Jim jumped out of bed and raced as fast as he could to where he'd heard a woman's shrill scream. He didn't even bother to put a robe over his sky blue polka dot pajamas as he darted to Artemus Gordon's room. The door swung open. "Sandy, are you all right?" he called.

Artie, dressed in his turquoise striped nightgown and nightcap, was up, patting his wife's back. Sandy Gordon stood in her dark maroon satin negligee, curlers in her hair, shaking.

"Honey, what's wrong?" asked Jim.

"Spider!" she shrieked.

"Where?" asked Jim.

"It was on my bed!" she shrieked.

Jim and Artie searched the bed. "Are you sure you weren't dreaming about it?"

Sandy shook her head. "I woke up and saw it, and started screaming for you."

Jim glared. "Why didn't you just wake Artie?" I was right in the middle of dreaming about a blue eyed blonde as beautiful as an angel!

"Well, I guess it was force of habit, since you always do the rescuing." she admitted.

"I wouldn't worry about it." said Artie, turning around. "It's probably gone by now."

Suddenly Sandy gasped.

"What's wrong?" asked Artie.

Jim saw it, too. "Artie, don't move."

Artie wondered why, but didn't question it.

Jim took off his nightcap and studied the small, black spider on Artie's back. He then hit it with a good whack!

"Ouch!" barked Artie, spinning around. "What did you do that for?"

Jim raced over to the corner of the wall and began beating on something in the corner. He then picked it up and sighed. "Because you had this."

Artemus' eyes narrowed as he studied the dead spider on Jim's palm. "That's a black widow spider!"

Jim nodded. "Quite poisonous."

"Did it bite?" squeaked Sandy.

"Well, do you feel anything?" asked Jim.

"No." said Sandy.

"Well, then, I don't think it got to you." said Artie.

Sandy breathed a sigh of relief.

"Well then." said Jim, covering a yawn, "I guess I'd better go back to bed. Goodnight."

"Goodnight." said Artie and Sandy. "And thanks!"

Jim smiled and buried himself under the covers as soon as he was back in bed. Now, about that dream concerning the blonde...

Jim was almost asleep when he heard another "AAAHHH!"

He jumped up again. "What now?"

"You left that creepy spider on my bed!" came the reply.

Jim sighed and raced back to Artie's room. Can't an agent get any sleep around here these days?

The End