Okay, so it feels like a long time since I've written fan fiction, but this came to me today and it's definitely going to be a mult-chapter. I have a lot of it planned out already. This of course is just a really short prologue, but give it a chance because I promise it will get better as I go. I'm pretty excited TBH, so yeah. Thanks to anyone who reads and reviews. It's highly appreciated.

Disclaimer - I don't own Victorious. That privilege goes to the one and only, flawless in every way and utmost hilarious person in the word, Dan Schneider.

Time keeps slipping away

And I'd hate to say I never tried all this time

Prologue: "He's more like me than anyone knows…"

"Beck is…" Jade had been trying so hard to explain her ex to Tori the other day and she didn't even know why she was bothering.

Tori had come up to her at her locker wanting to make sure she was okay. Of course she wasn't okay! But it wasn't going to help to lash out at her either. If anything, that would probably make Beck even more irritated by her/at her. Besides, she knew Vega was trying to come from a genuinely friendly and caring place.

"A nice guy." Tori supplied when Jade failed to finish her sentence for a long moment.

Jade nodded.

"He is. He totally is, but he's also…" She trailed off searching for the right words. "He's bad. He can be bad. Just no one else really gets to see it. He's more like me than anyone knows, but he doesn't let it out in front of a lot of people."

Jade reached for the back of her head where it was still tender to the touch. She felt a slight thrill go through he body when she felt that it still hurt a little bit. She had gotten that particular bruise on her head from Beck slamming her against the closed door of his RV when they had been heatedly making out, about a week ago before all this fighting, and the break up. He had apologized, not meaning to hit her head, but she had told him to shut up and kissed him back even more furiously. He knew that she liked it when he handled her a little on the rough side. There were times for tenderness and times to get down, pun intended. Beck wasn't typically the dominant one in their relationship, but in the bedroom… well, that was quite another story.

Jade was smiling to herself and when she realized it, the smile slowly turned sad and then disappeared completely. That was over a week ago. Her and Beck were no longer together. And that hurt. That hurt more than words or thoughts could describe. It hurt. Ached. An ache that spread from her thoughts to every bone in her body. Every muscle until she could hardly carry the weight of her own body when she went to school and had to act like she was okay. Had to watch Beck hang out with their friends with a smile on his face like he wasn't even bothered.

Beck was never one to show his emotions until that day they broke up when she had pushed him to the brink and he had let loose and actually screamed at her repeatedly. He didn't yell much. She was usually the one screaming at him and he would listen and try to calm her down. That was their dynamic, it always had been. She was hotheaded and jealous and he was even-tempered and a general peacemaker. He liked everyone to be happy and getting along, which was admirable she had to admit, in retrospect. At the time it had always just pissed her off more.

But now she found herself thinking… Beck… her Beck… did he miss her? Was he thinking of her? Whenever she caught him laughing with Tori or smiling at something stupid Robbie had done or jamming to Andre's new song idea… was he secretly hurting too? Did he still want to be with her? Why did she have this distinct feeling that she was alone in all these feelings? She felt like she was blindfolded and spinning in a endless vortex of nothing, but blackness. She could do nothing, but wallow in it.

That conversation with Vega had been a couple of days ago and she still couldn't stop thinking about it. Jade still wasn't speaking to Beck right now, just walking past every time she saw him. She knew him well enough to know he thought she was extremely immature and childish for acting this way. He would gladly still talk to her. Because as Vega had so eloquently put it, Beck was a "nice guy." But… it wasn't in Jade's nature to forgive and forget so easily. Nope. That wasn't Jade West's personality, her way. Besides, it honestly hurt too much to look at him right now, knowing she couldn't hold his hand or kiss his lips or know without a doubt that he would pull her in against his side and kiss the side of her head and place his arm around her shoulders or waist as soon as she was in close enough proximity to him. Fuck.

This day was going to be just as bad as all the others had been so far, post break-up. But then, as Jade was putting away some of her schoolbooks in her locker, she overheard a very interesting conversation going on between little Cat Valentine and Tori Vega. Tori seemed to be begging Cat to go on a trip with her, a trip where they'd have to drive for a few hours at least. Jade knew they had long weekend ahead, perfect timing for a trip, she guessed. She shut her locker and walked over, wanting to hear more, her boots squeaking against the shiny floor of Hollywood Arts High School. Usually she had little to no interest in what Vega had to say or her plans, but she was taking Cat. What would ever possess her to do that?

So, I will continue soon. I did say I already have a lot of this planned out. A lot of drama will ensure. They'll meet different people. I've had writer's block for a long while and so this is definitely helping me. Reviews are welcome! :) Let me know what you think