Disclaimer: The characters of Supernatural do not belong to me. The original character of Evelyn Winchester does.
A/N: This story takes place in the season 1 episode, Faith.
I realized after I posted this that I had my episodes or of order in season 1. I was thinking the episode Faith came before the episode Asylum, where I had Evy participating in her first hunt. Oh well.
Evy was on the edge of her seat, waiting anxiously for Sam and Dean to come out with the two kids inside the house. She had a small assignment on this hunt, but she intended to do the absolute best job she could with it. She hadn't outright asked Sam whether she could start hunting with them. She knew that, with Jess's death still so fresh to them, that would likely be out of the question. So instead she buckled down on her schoolwork, the training that she went through mostly with Dean, and helped them with research whenever Sam would permit. She wanted to give Sam as little ammunition to object with when she finally did ask to hunt. Sam came out of the house, holding the two kids under his arm, and quickly opened the back door of the Impala to put them in the backseat with Evy.
"Dean's still inside. Keep an eye on them and I'll be back."
Evy nodded, and Sam ran inside to help Dean. The kids were shaking and frightened, so Evy kept them occupied while waiting for Sam and Dean to come back out. A few minutes later, Sam did come out, carrying a slumped over Dean in his arms.
"What happened?" Evy asked as Sam placed him in the front passenger seat.
"He was electrocuted." Sam said, quickly buckling Dean in and going to the driver's side.
Evy turned to the kids in the backseat with her, both of whom had been too frightened to give her their names. "Are you two okay?" They nodded, and Evy quickly jumped to the front seat, between Sam and Dean.
"What are you doing?" Sam asked.
"Sitting with Dean." Evy explained.
"But he's unconscious." Sam said.
"That doesn't matter. If it was me here, he'd do the same thing." Evy said. "Come on, Sammy, we don't have time to argue. Let's go!"
Sam put the car in drive, and Evy talked to Dean the whole way. She was sure that telling him he'd be okay, that they were getting him help and he'd be better in no time, and to wake up soon because she needed his help finishing the pie she planned to get for dinner that night soothed her own nerves more than comforted Dean. But it worked. They reached the hospital, got the kids help from the police and back to their parents, and got Dean looked at by a doctor. The news was much worse than electrocution. Dean was dying, with likely only a month or so to live. Sam attempted to calmly persuade Dean to fight, to keep living, but Evy took another route.
"You're just gonna give up?"
"Kiddo, I can't…" Dean started to say, before Evy mowed over him again.
"No, Dean. You're not giving up. We're finding a way to heal you whether you like it or not. Got it?"
Dean smiled. "When did you become so stubborn?"
"The day she was born." Sam answered.
"I mean it, Dean. We need you." Evy said seriously. "Promise you'll at least let Sammy look into it."
Dean nodded. "Okay, kiddo. I promise."
"Don't just say you promise to make me feel better. I'm twelve, not two. Don't say it if you don't mean it."
"I promise I'll let Sam look." Dean repeated.
"Dean, we're going back to the motel." Sam said. "Get some rest."
Evy walked to the bed to give him a hug and asked again, "Dean, please. We already lost Jess, and Daddy's still gone. I can't lose you too. Please don't give up."
"I'll do my best, kiddo. Go on, go back with Sammy."
"'Kay. Love you, Deanie." Evy said.
"Love you more, kiddo."
Evy left the hospital with Sam, her mind turning over and over. She tried to do her schoolwork when Sam told her to, but couldn't concentrate. She got nowhere in the three nights and two days they spent going between Dean's hospital room and the motel room. She heard Sam calling John and thought about her own call she'd made to him back at the hospital.
Daddy, it's Evy. Again. Dean's in trouble. He got hurt on a hunt today and his heart's been damaged. The doctor said he doesn't have very long to live. Just a few weeks, if even that. I know you're not happy with me and Sammy, but please don't let that stop you. Dean needs you, Daddy. Please come back to us, even if it's just for just a little while. I love you, Daddy. Please come back.
Sam hung up the phone and turned to Evy. She was looking at the book she was supposed to be reading, but he could tell her mind was far away. She was on the same page she'd been on when she sat down twenty minutes earlier. Sam felt a slight bit of guilt. How could he expect her to concentrate on everyday things when he could barely function at the moment himself? He put the phone down and sat beside her, placing a hand on her back and scratching it lightly.
"You okay?"
"Yeah." Evy said quietly.
"You sure? You want to talk about it?" Sam asked.
"No."
"Is it Dean?" Sam pushed. "I know you're worried about him. I am too…"
"I said I don't want to talk about it!" Evy snapped.
"Watch the attitude or you're restricted to the Impala and this room until we're done with this." Sam snapped back, before realizing how tired he was. "Cricket…"
"I thought he'd be here by now." Evy admitted.
"You thought who would be here by now?" Sam asked. "Dad?"
"Yeah."
"Cricket, I just called…"
"I called him at the hospital." Evy said. "That was over six hours ago."
"When did you call him?"
"When I went to the bathroom. I came out and used a payphone right before I went back to Dean's room." Evy explained.
"Cricket…" Sam started to scold her for not coming straight back.
"I know I was supposed to come back." Evy said. "But I thought maybe if it was Dean needing him, he'd actually come this time."
"This time? Have you called him before?"
"Yeah. I used to call him from Stanford." Evy said. "And I called him when Jess died, and a few times since."
"I thought you said you were done calling him."
Evy shrugged. "I thought I was. But it scares me."
"What scares you?"
"Dean does everything for Daddy. If he won't even come for Dean, then how much can he really care about you and me?" Evy asked.
Sam sighed. Evy didn't know it, but she'd pinpointed his fears as well as her own. "Cricket, I wish I could tell you you were wrong, but I can't. I just don't know what Dad's thinking. But no matter what happens, with Dad, with Dean, with everything else, you and I will always be together."
"Will we?" Evy asked.
"What does that mean?"
"What happens if we find whatever killed your mom and Jess? If Daddy stops hunting?" Evy asked. "Do I go back to live with him?"
"Do you want to?"
"I don't know." Evy said. "I don't know if it would be different if we tried again."
"How about this?" Sam asked. "Since it's still an if right now, and we've got to worry about getting Dean better, we won't think about it. When this is over, we'll talk about it again. Deal?"
"Deal."
"But Cricket? If and when that time comes, and you do decide you want to stay with me, the answer will never be no. Okay?"
Evy smiled. "Okay."
"Feel better?"
"Yeah, I feel better. Thanks, Sammy." Evy said.
"You're welcome, ba…" A knock at the door stopped Sam in his tracks. He put a finger to his mouth, Evy nodded, and he went to answer the door. "What the hell are you doing here?"
"I checked myself out."
"Are you crazy?" Sam asked.
"I'm not gonna die in a hospital when the nurses aren't even hot."
"You promised." A hurt Evy said from the bed, causing Dean to turn and drop his insincere smile. "You promised you'd let Sammy try to help you."
"Kiddo, I still am…"
"Then what are you doing out of the hospital?" Evy asked. "You're still sick, why are you here?"
"Because I wanted to be with you." Dean said, quickly coming up with an answer she would accept. "I swear that's the only reason."
Evy figured that Dean was just trying to make her feel better, but she accepted his answer anyway. "Okay."
Dean sat next to her on the bed and ruffled her hair, and Evy finally smiled and hugged him. Dean lightly tickled her side, making her laugh, before Sam instructed,
"Cricket, pack up. I'm going to tell Dean what we talked about earlier today."
"Okay." Evy said, releasing Dean and packing her books back into her bag.
Dean was reluctant to go, and only agreed after being pushed by Sam and threatened by Evy ("I'll tie you up and throw you in the trunk if you don't go"). She stayed in the motel room when Sam told her to, though not without a fight. The idea of sitting out when Dean's life was at stake made her rare streak of rebellion come out full swing.
"It's not fair, Sammy! He's my brother too!"
"I know that, Cricket. Just listen to me." Sam said. "The fact that it's Dean is exactly the reason I want you to stay in here. I think this will work, but just in case it goes sideways, I want to make sure you're safe."
Evy huffed and crossed her arms. "I know you want to protect me. But you're just treating me like a baby. Dean's in trouble and I want to help."
"No. Not this time." Sam said firmly.
"Then when?" Evy insisted.
"Cricket, this isn't the time to talk about it. I've gotta go." Sam said. "Get to work on your schoolwork and I'll be back soon."
Evy turned away from him, pouting. "Fine."
Sam's instinct was to scold her, but he knew it would only make the situation worse. Instead he reached over and brushed some of her hair away from her face. "I love you."
"Love you too."
Sam left the room, leaving Evy alone with her thoughts. Above all, she was frustrated. She knew Sam only wanted what was best for her, and she knew this life on the road with Dean was far from what he considered the best. But Evy secretly enjoyed it. Sam and Dean were much more patient with her questions than John had been when she travelled with him. She liked it in the rare moments when Sam and Dean would let her in on what they were doing. She knew Sam hated it, which was why she didn't fight him too much when he told her to do her schoolwork, read, or go to bed. Trying to distract herself, Evy took out her homework, but wasn't working for too long before Dean came back with some food.
"Hey, kiddo. How you doing?"
"Okay. Bored." Evy answered.
Dean put the brown bag on the table and smiled. "Sam told me you were a little ticked off with him."
"I just want to help." Evy whined.
"I know, kiddo." Dean said. "Can I eat with you?"
"Sure." Evy said, before noticing something. "You look better."
Dean smiled. "That's because I am."
Evy gasped. "You're okay?"
Dean nodded. "Yeah, kiddo, I'm okay."
Evy didn't answer, just squealed in delight and jumped up from her seat to grab Dean in a hug. She held him at the waist for a few moments, overwhelmed with relief and happiness. Had she paid closer attention, she might have noticed that Dean was upset about something. But she had her big brother back, and for the moment, that was all that mattered.
"Come on, kiddo. I'm hungry. Let's eat."
As Evy sat down, she asked, "Deanie? Can I ask you something?"
"Sure. What's up?"
"You promise you'd tell me the truth?" Evy asked.
"Have I ever lied to you before?"
"If you had, would you have told me?"
Dean laughed. "Good point. I promise. What's going on?"
"Does Daddy still care about me and Sammy?"
Dean, surprised at the question, asked, "Where did that come from?"
"I just want to know. When we find him, is he gonna want to see us?"
"Kiddo, listen to me." Dean put down the fork in his hand and grabbed Evy's hand. "After you left, Dad was never, ever mad at you. Not once."
"He wasn't?"
"No. He missed you so bad, kiddo." Dean said. "I know it didn't feel like it, but Dad loved you more than he knew what to do with."
"How do you know? Did he say that?" Evy asked, tears building up in her eyes that she tried to fight. "I just wanted to hear him say it once while I lived with Sammy."
Dean suddenly got an idea. "Let me show you something." Dean went to his duffle bag and pulled out an old cell phone. He pressed a few buttons and handed it to Evy. "Look at this."
"What is it?" Evy asked. On the screen was a list of call times. Each was labeled 'SW' with a date and time.
"Play one." Dean said.
Evy pressed play, and her mouth dropped open. Over the speaker was her voice from nearly four years earlier. Hi, Daddy. I got to Sammy's late last night. He's showing me around today, then he's working tonight. Jess is living with us too. She's coming with me and Sammy tomorrow to meet my new teacher and see my new school. I'm kind of nervous about it. I love you, Daddy. I'll call you back soon.
"That's me." Evy said.
"That's right. Dad saved every single message you sent him. When he had to change phones, he'd record them on the new ones. I even made him a tape of them to play in the truck."
"Why wouldn't he tell me?" Evy asked.
"Kiddo, Dad's always had a hard time telling us he cares about us. He loves us, he just doesn't always remember to say it. Or show it. Did you know he used to go see you and Sammy?"
"What? He did?"
"Yep. He sure did. He came every time he could. Including some of those times you called and asked for him." Dean said.
"Why would he come and not say anything?"
"'Cause he thought it was safer that way. I disagreed with him, and I tried to get him to talk to you, or let you know he was there. But he wouldn't do it." Dean explained. "Kiddo, my point is this. He never stopped caring. He did what he thought would keep you and Sam safe."
"When we find him, and all this is over, will you promise to make him not do that again?" Evy asked.
"You want me to make Dad not do something?" Dean asked incredulously.
"Will you try? Please? For me?" Evy asked. "I just want us to be a family."
"Yeah, kiddo. I'll try."
The case was solved soon after that, and Evy packed her things to prepare to go. A girl showed up, and after Dean made introductions, she went to wait for him in the hallway. Sam followed behind her, taking a seat next to her on the small couch there. She was avoiding looking at him. Sam held an arm out towards her and pulled on her hand, a small grin on his face.
"I'm too big for that." Evy weakly objected.
"Indulge me. Please." Sam asked.
Evy huffed. "Fine."
She stood up and crawled into Sam's lap, surprised to find that she still fit there. Sam's long arms wrapped around her, and she hugged his arms to her. They sat that way for a few moments, holding each other and in complete silence, until Sam finally spoke up.
"I know you want to help. I understand that. I do. But I can't let you yet."
"Why not?" Evy asked. "Why are letting me learn if you're not gonna let me do anything?"
Sam sighed. "You're doing so well with everything we've given you to do. But I'm not ready for you to be out here with us. Cricket, I love you more than anything. After what happened with Jess and now Dad going missing, I can't stand the thought of something happening to you."
"But that's how I feel about you." Evy protested. "That's why I want to help keep you safe too."
"I thought you hated hunting."
"No. I hated Daddy and Dean being away all the time." Evy explained. "That's why I don't like sitting in the room by myself or in the car."
"I know." Sam said. "I get it. Please, just give me a little longer before I let you help. It's not forever, I just need a little longer."
"When?" Evy pushed.
"I don't know."
Evy sighed. "If you won't give me a timeline, you promise not to be mad when I ask again?"
"Deal." Sma agreed. "I love you, Cricket."
"I love you too."
"You two ready to go?" Dean had come out of the room, holding his bag and Evy's.
"Yeah, I'm ready." Evy said. "I'm hungry."
"Me too." Dean agreed. "Sam, why don't you grab your bags?"
"You brought hers!" Sam objected.
"She's cuter than you." Dean replied, making Evy giggle. When Sam rolled his eyes, Dean asked, "You feeling better about Dad, kiddo?"
Evy smiled. "Yeah. He'll be back. And everything'll be okay."
"What makes you so sure?" Sam asked.
Evy looked up and asked, "Would you be able to stay away from this cute face?"
Sam and Dean both laughed at that. "Come on, Cricket. Let's go."