In a room lit by the moon
3 Hey! I haven't written a fanfiction in a very, very long time, nee? I decided to discontinue the last one cause… it didn't sound real… D This one will be much better, I hope.
This is a two-shot. Is that actually a word? Oh well.., Live with it. It's just a two chapter story on some pretty dark themes.
Warning: sniff This fanfiction contains, cutting, contemplation of suicide, character death, yaoi and incest rape / (which I'm not to proud of by the way) So… if you don't feel comfortable reading things with these contents, please don't. I'm telling you now, so I better not get any comments saying that I never stated anything about it. X3
Disclaimer: I do NOT own Gravitation… if I did, the world would be over as we know it.
I might as well tell you now that you should be familiar with Gravitation to understand the beginning. X3 hint hint…. Red hair... mmm… That's my cover-up. What I am trying to say is… I'm really horrible at trying to introduce characters.
A/N: Lets just say Hiro lives with his parents… And sorry about the beginning being a bit choppy... I really didn't mean to... oops... too many disclaimers.
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Flesh hitting against flesh. Sweat dripping off both figures. Moans in the dark. The two figures lit by the glow of the moon appeared as if this sin were holy. The bed sheets where no longer made in the tight corners of the bed, but wrinkled from the action taking place upon the covers.
"More…" a voice panted in the darkness. "Tatsuha… more."
Red hair illuminated by the moon light flipped in the air with the thrust of the other. Faster and faster the two went till they burst, making Tatsuha a hot and sticky blanket on the other.
"Hiro…" Tatsuha moaned nipping at the skin on his neck. (A/N: uhuuhuu… kinky no?) He grabbed his arms and pinned Hiro to the bed until he noticed long thin lines going across his lovers arms.
"What's this… on your arms…" Tatsuha said trying to hold back tears.
"Tatsuha, I can explain." Hiro felt Tatsuha starting to shake.
"Why didn't you tell me this before… that you were doing this…" Tatsuha said with his voice growing lower with each syllable spoken. Hiro looked away in shame and discuss of his own self. He felt as if everything he had was lost.
That next morning when Hiro woke up, he woke up alone. Where could Tatsuha have gone? Hiro left that same morning back to his home.
When he arrived there he was greeted by his drunk father.
"Where were you last night?" he said with his voice slurring on every word.
"Out." Was the only answer Hiro could give. He dared not to tell him that he was with Tatsuha because, in his fathers eyes, having a gay relationship was forbidden. It was really what led his mother to her grave.
Hiro had broken his parents hearts once by becoming a musician. When he 'came out of the closet' so to speak, his mother almost has a heart attack. His family was strictly traditional, which means: no gay relationships. A week or so after that, his mother committed suicide, and that's when all the troubles began.
After the lost of his wife, Hiro's father became a drunkard and started becoming abusive towards Hiro, blaming him for his mothers death.
But this morning when Hiro came in, his father did something that would never be forgotten.
"You smell like a whore!" Hiro's father shouted. "You were out with that fag boy again, weren't you."
He pushed Hiro up against the wall making a large thud. His hands were tied to the bed post behind his back and his lower garments were ripped off. His father slowly moved in, and that's when Hiro felt a sharp pain in his lower area. He let out a soft cry and begged for someone to save him; but no one did and he had to endure the pain. His eyes became dull with tears breaking outfrom the sides. But those tears never really did fall then.
His father had left the room. He had left the room for him to clean. Hiro could barely stand up, but somehow he did. He cleaned the blood and other liquids off the floor and warped the dirty bed sheet before he collapsed. The tears that didn't fall, fell.
In the middle of all the sobs and hicks he grabbed a razor from the box of refills (A/N: They do have refills… right? and started to hack away at his arms. The first cut was light but as time grew, he started going faster and harder. Blood dripped on the already blood stained sheets. He was going to wash them, so did it really matter?
There he slept.
About an hour later he awoke and took the sheets to the washing machine out in the garage, but to his surprise Shuichi was out there just about to ring the door bell.
"Hey Hiro!" Shuichi smiled, but his smile was soon turned into a look of concern. "What the hell happened to your arm?"
"Oh, I just fell." Hiro said carelessly. He didn't expect to see anyone for the next few hours so he didn't bother to clean and conceal the wound. The dry blood was crusted on his arm and it was starting to peel, so it was hard for Shuichi not to notice.
'Hiro… I'm not stupid…' Shuichi thought.
"Shu, I'll catch up with you later. I have to do the laundry." Hiro then let out a phony, yet believable smile.
"Okay…"
Shuichi headed towards his home with Yuki, the other part of the Uesugi pair.
"Yuki?" Shuichi called.
"What?" Yuki answered with an annoyance to his voice. (A/N: I just didn'thave the heart to make Yuki that mean today. x3)
"I'm worried about Hiro. I saw cuts on his arm… and they were no accident." Shuichi's head drooped down. "I-I just don't know what to do… He could hurt himself really badly… or he could… could…" Shuichi's tears dropped on the floor, and now more than ever, he felt like a helpless child. Yuki knew that and embraced him in his arms.
"You really don't know that…" Yuki said kissing the tears away.
"I can I not know. The cuts were all over his fucking arm!" Shuichi's voice suddenly had taken an angry tone.
"Shh" Yuki hushed. "I'll talk to my brother about it… don't worry."
After Yuki was sure his pink-headed lover was asleep he called his bother. The Tatsuha he heard on the phone wasn't the Tatsuha he expected to hear. He sounded groggy and as if he had just been crying for the last few hours.
"Yuki… He's given up…" Was the first thing Tatsuha said since he has answered the phone.
"Do you know about Hiroshi and his cutting habits?" Yuki asked.
"I don't know what I did wrong. What was so wrong in his life!"
"You don't know that it was you."
"THEN WHAT ELSE COULD IT HAVE BEEN!" Tatsuha shouted with a tone even his own brother had never heard. "He's never talked to me. He was always so happy."
"GOD DAMNIT! You're one of the only people that I know that NEVER give up! And here you are wallowing in your own self pity when someone who is obviously close to you is in danger. You aren't my brother anymore. You're something foreign, something that quits." Tatsuha remained quiet, Yuki could hear sobs come from the other line. "Shuichi said that he saw new cuts on his arms when he came over to visit." Yuki's voice had calmed down. (A/N: I just love turmoil between these two)
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"Shit, shit, shit!" Hiro thought. "He's seen too much. I know Shuichi's not that dense." He backed himself onto a wall and slid down. He grabbed the razor he had used earlier and started once again, but cutting along his arm…
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Tatsuha went cold to what Yuki had said. He hung up and dialed Hiro's number not knowing what to expect. Would he get a perky Hiro? Or abeaten one? Would he even get an answer at all?
When no one picked up Tatsuha got even more worried about his red headed lover. He hopped on his bike and speed over to his house breaking nearly all the laws in the book. He didn't even bother to knock, he just barged and was overwhelmed with the smell of rotting flesh. He braced himself for the worst, but obviously that wasn't even enough.
He walked up to see his lover broken into pieces. The person who stood so tall curled into a helpless ball. Tatsuha ran up to him and held his head up by his chinand kissed Hiro's lips that were still warm. Tears gathered in his eyes and fell freely.
"Hiro… can you hear me?" Tatsuha cried. He didn't even wait for an answer before calling 911.
At the hospital Tatsuha anxiously waited for news on Hiro. Soon after, he was greeted by his brother and a puffy eyed Shuichi. A little latter after that, Fujisaki and K arrived.
Tatsuha started to pace around. Step after step, seconds grew few and far between. A nurse arrived and told him that Hiro was stable enough and he could have visitors. That had liffeted a heavy burden off of his heart.
The room was a blinding white. Red blood stains had spotted the clean floor.
"Hi-ro…" Tatsuha's voice shook. He placed his hand upon his lovers head. He was cold. He then placed his lips upon the others. His tears falling on Hiro's face.
Hiro's arms were tightly bandaged with red staining the white. Everything about him looked peaceful and childish. He looked so helpless. Tatsuha traced his finger around his lovers wrists when his hand twitched.
Hiro's face that was once peaceful face turned into a face full of pain a horror, which made Tatsuha sob even harder.
"It's okay… I'mhere with you…" Tatsuha reassured, and his face grew calm once again.
Two weeks later, he was released out of the hospital, and back to his own home. He told Tatsuha not to worry about him, and that going back home would be for the best. The sad part was, Tatsuha believed him. Hiro was trying to protect him, he knew that if he was gone any longer, his father would go after him.
When he entered the door his father came charging after him.
"Where the fuck have you been." His father screamed slapping him on the face. "It's been two fucking weeks."
Hiro just stood there enduring every hit his father threw.
"Do you need me to show you a lesson like last time?" Hiro winced at that thought of having to go through that all over again.
Hiro had no response.
"So have it." His father said pinning him to the wall. Hiro could smell the alcohol in his breath. His father placed his arm against Hiro's neck suffocating him as he reached for his back pocket. He pulled out a small razor and started marking the boys beautiful face with bright red lines.
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Tatsuha had an uneasy feeling about everything. He wasn't sure if Hiro was actually as fine as he said he was. He felt fear. Fear for the one thing that meant the world to him. And that one thing was Nakano Hiroshi.
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Hiro was able to loosen away out of his fathers grip and tried to run out the door. His father was too drunk to chase after him. A/N: I think that Hiro needs a break… I'm hurting him too much. He was still dizzy from his leave from the hospital and stumbled a few times getting to the door. He tried to run as far as he could get. He reached NG Studios and dropped by the side of the building.
"Tatsuha… save me." He said before blanking out. A/N: It's a surprise no one had seen him… and… it's just going to keep on getting worse and worse.
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Tatsuha had a sudden impulse to drive to NG. He didn't know why, but something was tugging at him. When he saw Hiro, he almost flew off his bike. He ran over to his lover and carried him inside the building. "It's going to be alright…"
"Tatsuha…" A small voice called out. "I'm sorry."
"No, it's alright, everything will be okay. You wont have to worry anymore because, I'm here with you right now." Tatsuha could feel his lovers body start to shake and he started to cry.
"I'm too dirty. I-I… You… should have never come. I'm too dirty." Hiro chanted those words over and over again… "I'm too dirty…" and Tatsuha didn't know why.
Tatsuha kissed the tears away. "No… you're not dirty."
"How would you know?" Hiro said with a slight hate in his voice.
"I just know." Tatsuha said, grasping his hand in his.
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Owari
Okay.. this is the end of the first chapter in this two chapter fic. I hope it was to your liking. It's so angst though. I feel as if I added too much. Did I? Oh, and please excuse my gramatical (sp) errors. I wish I could say I don't speak english, but that would be a lie. The truth is I'm just really horrible at it. PLEASE READ AND REVIEW! X3 I'll give anyone who comments a virtual cookie.