Welcome to My Fan Fic! This is Definitely the Longest One I've Written so Far.
So Yeah, I Really Don't Have Much to Say Except....
Jasper: *Sigh* April Doesn't Any Twilight or Anything Related Blah Blah Blah.
You're so Enthusiastic, Jazzy.
Jasper: DO YOU KNOW WHAT I'VE BEEN PUT THROUGH.
Calm Down. Calm Down.
Onto the Story :D

"Goodbye!" Emmett and I called in sync as the rest of our family scattered off into the woods to hunt. We had gone hunting yesterday so today could be brotherly bonding day. But Edward's too busy stalking Bella. Dammit, Edward, either kill that whore already or I'll have to do it. I couldn't tell if I should be grinning or grimacing at that thought. Killing that worthless girl would be doing a huge favor to the whole planet but I don't think I want to put my mouth anywhere near her. Yuck.

Everyone thought I just didn't like being near Bella because she tempted me too much, but honestly that girl was just such a bitch. No matter how long I thought about it, I couldn't understand how my lovely Alice could be best friends with something like that. I was totally on Rose's side on the whole "Bella Issue" as we liked to call it.

Emmett's booming voice took me out of my thoughts. "Alright, so now that everyone's gone, what do we do?" I shrugged, still thinking about killing Bella, and Emmett pouted. I swear he was like an 8-year-old stuck in a 20-year-old's body. Which is really strange because he's a 93-year-old stuck in a 20-year-old's body. I guess some people, or in this case, vampires, never grow up.

When I looked up again I noticed Emmett was gone. Never a good sign. "Emmett?" I called. "Em? Where are you? Please don't tell me you're playing hide & go seek cuz that'd just be putting your immaturity over the top."

Instead of looking for him I decided to try finding him by sensing his emotions. As I walked around the house I was suddenly struck with a huge wave of excitement. And it was coming from the bathroom. Oh god… Did I really want to go check on what was making Emmett excited in the bathroom?

"Emmett?" I tried again outside the door, really not wanting to go in. But he didn't answer me so I had no choice. I through the door open, only to find my brother standing at the medicine cabinet. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Carlisle's gone," he answered matter-of-factly.

"So?" I urged.

"Yes! Jackpot!" Emmett yelled as he clutched a white bottle in his hand.

"Em, what are you doing?" I asked, almost afraid of the answer.

"I'm raiding Carlisle's drugs! It's time for some fun!" Oh yes, I was definitely afraid of the answer. Normal Emmett was bad enough, but an Emmett hyped up on drugs? That could only end badly.

"Emmett, put down the drugs!" I ordered going into my military mode, which was almost always necessary when dealing with Emmett.

"No!" he yelled and ran out of the room. My god, must he always be so difficult?! I starting chasing him downstairs and smirked, even though Emmett was stronger, I was faster. I ran as fast as I could and was catching up to him quickly.

"You have no chance, Em!" I yelled, taunting him. But, when I looked in front of me, it was too late to stop. Emmett had moved the couch in front of the door way to block me off. I growled, he wasn't as dumb as he looked.

Pushing the couch out of the way, I couldn't the chase, but it ended when I saw him curled up in a corner, shaking slightly. My horrors were confirmed when I saw an empty bottle rolling down the tile.

He looked as if he were a bomb, just waiting to be set off. I carefully approached my brother, as if any swift movement would ignite the dynamite. "Em?" I said softly. He needed respond so I shook him slightly. He closed his eyes and everything went limp. Oh god. There was no way he could be dead. Well, technically he was already dead but, dead dead. Only fire could do that!

"Emmett," I tried once more. Suddenly, he shot up like a firecracker. There was a crazed look in his eyes, and I'm not afraid to admit that I was honestly scared of Emmett at that moment.

"Jaaaaaaaaaaaaazzy," he said like a drunken idiot, which he probably was, "Let's go have some fun."

I backed away, though there was no escape, "No, I'd rather not."

"Aw, come on, Jazz. Live a little," Emmett said as he crept closer.

"We're dead."

"Live up the dead life, what's the point of being immortal if you don't have a little fun with it?"

"Really, Em, I'd rather not," I said trying to push him away, but Emmett's strength was too much. I looked down at the bottle to see exactly what he had taken. Steroids and that drug you take when you're schizophrenic. This is going to be a fun night…

15 Minutes Later

"Don't we look gorgeous, Jasper?" Emmett said as he posed in front of the mirror.

"Y-yes," I stuttered afraid of what he would do if I said no. You do not wanna mess with someone who's hyped up on steroids and multiple personality meds.

Not only had Emmett dragged me up to Alice's room but he raided her closet and put two of her favorite dresses on us. My wife may be tiny, but you really did not want to mess with her clothes. I think Emmett and I are going to die tonight.

He continued posing in Alice's royal blue sequined dress, while I just sat on our bed in her layered magenta one. That dress really showed off his muscles… Stop it, Jasper, stop it! Emmett blew a kiss to the mirror, while I cringed, before he turned around with a look of horror on his face. Oh god, please don't tell me they're home!

"What is it!?" I asked in panic.

"How can we be having a fashion show with no makeup or accessories!? Or shoes!? Go get some NOW!"

There was no way I was going to argue with insane Emmett so I quickly zipped around the room finding everything. Please understand, Alice, I didn't have a choice. Oh no. I stopped dead in my tracks. Alice, had probably seen this.

My suspicions were confirmed as I looked over to the windowsill to see Edward and Bella watching us with cameras in their hands.

My mouth fell open and I immediately grabbed the blanket off our bed to try and cover myself up. The two climbed into the room and couldn't stop laughing.

"Alice called and said Emmett was planning on doing something pretty stupid. So I figured I should stop by and check up on things. Enjoying how Emmett's muscles look in that dress, Jazz?"

I growled as fiercely as a man could while in a pink dress when Emmett turned around. I didn't even have to see the look on Emmett's face because I could tell by the look on Edward's that he was pissed.

But, before anyone could say anything Alice and Rosalie burst into the room. The amount of anger coming off of Alice and Rose was unbelievable.

"What the hell!?" they both yelled at the same time, but suddenly I felt anger coming from another person. It wasn't Emmett… The answer came through the door the next second.

"Who the heck took all of my medications!?" I don't think I've seen Carlisle that angry since Emmett ran around the ER screaming 'I've been bitten! I've been bitten!'

Our fatherly figure looked straight past Emmett, who I thought would be a prime target for taking the drugs. But, instead he glared right at Bella. "You stinking good for nothing, pot-head!" he yelled as he lunged at her. Emmett got a good grasp on Edward and Carlisle proceeded to throw Bella out the window.

We all stared at him with mixed emotions coming from everyone. A few seconds went by before we all yelled out, "Yay!"

Everyone felt relief and happiness at the human's death, though I was confused.

The drugs wore off on Emmett during the adrenaline rush of seeing Bella die, and he looked at me first, silently asking why I was happy. "Never liked that whore."

Then Rosalie, "That slut would go to bed with Mike Newton if he had as much cash as us."

Then Carlisle and Esme, "Gold digger," they replied at the same time.

Then Alice, "She was planning on throwing a party and not inviting me, so I'm glad she died."

Finally, we all looked to Edward, "I had to find some stupid slut to have sex with me so everyone would stop calling me the 107-year-old virgin."

We all nodded and started laughing uncontrollably. I'm surprised Alice was able to forget about the dresses, but none the less grateful.

But, just as Emmett and I were about to go change the window came crashing in. And who else could it be but, Charlie Swan, Chief of Fork's Police.

"You two are under arrest!" he yelled at us. Before we could ask why we were handcuffed and taken to the cop car. We couldn't break out of them or we'd be exposed so we were taken to jail. Emmett and I got stuck in a jail cell wearing dresses.

As we lay there in our private cell, still hand cuffed, wondering why the hell no one from our family came to bail us out yet when Emmett turned to me and said, "Great bonding, huh, Bro?"

I sighed, "Great, Emmett. Just great."

Well That's the End! Sorry For the Craptastic Ending, But I Really Couldn't Think of Anything Else.
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Just Tell Me if You Think it's Good or Not, That's All I Ask For :D
Alright, Bye Bye!