In the middle of the night when I'm suppose to be asleep a light turns on. just one small light,my camera go trough the pitchers I've taken of my friends,knowing and sometimes hoping that this might be the last thing I see. the smiling faces of the ones I love. not because I hate them,just because I'm losing my mind. I'd hope I would die night after night,so that they would never see me for what I am,a crazy girl with a blood lust in her eyes. in my sleep I can see myself slicing them with my knifes and watching the blood drip from every part of their body's. then I wake up to regain the parts of myself that have started to slip away,but I'm never truly whole again. day by day,night by endless night my sanity slips away until the day I become nothing,so until that day I look at my camera and hope that death will come swift and painlessly in the night.
Big brother,is this what it was like for you?