A/N : Well, I already posted this elsewhere a long time ago, and had just realised that I haven't posted it here. Oh well. Enjoy!~
"YOU IDIOT FLEA! GET OUT OF IKEBUKURO!"
The roar from the Heiwajima Shizuo echoed in the streets, causing everyone to run out of the immediate area to steer away from a certain impending doom. A red vending machine flew in the air and smashed to the ground near Orihara Izaya's feet as he sidestepped away from the dangerous path.
"Ahahaha! Shizu-chan, you're losing your touch!" laughed Izaya as he pointed a mocking finger in the blonde's way. He daringly skipped closer to the angered man and leaned in with a snicker. "What were you aiming for? The road?"
A vein throbbed at Shizuo's temple and he grabbed Izaya's parka by the neck, lifting him up unceremoniously in the air. He then butted heads with Izaya and growled.
"You shitty bastard. What are you planning now, stupid flea?"
Izaya clicked his tongue in disapproval and removed Shizuo's sunglasses before putting it on himself. Nudging the sunglasses at the bridge of his nose, Izaya replied. "I just want to annoy you, Shizu-chan~ Even if I DO have a plan…I wouldn't be dumb enough to tell you. Now who's the stupid one here?"
"What was that?!"
Izaya pulled his head away from Shizuo's and shrugged his shoulder.
"Well, whatever. If you don't put me down now, you're gonna be sorry~" said Izaya in a singsong voice. At that, Shizuo barked out a laugh.
"What the hell, flea?! You think I'm going to miss this chance to throw you halfway across Ikebukuro at just some stupid threat?" yelled Shizuo as he gripped Izaya's parka tighter. The maniacal grin on his face showed how serious he was with going through with his threat, though for the life of him, he couldn't fathom why Izaya's grin went wider too.
"Hehehe~ Don't say I didn't warn you, now!"
"Like hell!"
Shizuo spun on his feet, swinging Izaya hard with him as each turn gained him more momentum for a further throw. Before the ex-bartender could follow through with the throw, a familiar stern voice behind him stopped him in his track.
"Heiwajima Shizuo! You put that nice man down, right now!"
Because of the previous furious spinning, Shizuo was dizzy and couldn't keep on his feet properly. Thus, he fell in a heap on the ground with Izaya on top of him, who was also dizzy and trying to hold his head in an attempt to lower his dizziness.
Shizuo groaned and sat up groggily, only to look up to the figure of his mother crossing her arms with her foot tapping impatiently.
"M-Mom?!"
"Yes, Shizuo…'Mom'," said his mother.
From Shizuo's lap, Izaya tried to get up but failed.
"I told you…Shizu-chan~ You'll b…e sorry if you…don't put me down…"
Boxing Izaya's ears, Shizuo muttered, "Shut up, stupid flea…and give me back my sunglasses!"
"Ouch!"
Izaya got up with much difficulty; his legs still unsteady from his dizziness. He tried his best to turn towards Shizuo's mother and nodded in acknowledgement.
"Heiwajima Namiko-san, a pleasure to meet you," said Izaya with a charming smile as he put his hand to his chest. "I am Orihara Izaya, Shizuo's best friend."
"THE FUCK, FLEA?! SINCE WHEN WERE YOU MY BEST FRIEND?" shouted Shizuo indignantly from the ground.
"Shizuo! Mind your language!" admonished Namiko. She waved her index finger in a warning gesture, causing Shizuo to hang his head in shame, much to the crowd's surprise. Who would've known that the Heiwajima Shizuo was afraid of his own mother!
"Sorry, mom…" mumbled Shizuo in apology.
Namiko looked down at her son and tutted. "You shouldn't be apologizing to me! Apologise to Orihara-san!"
"What?! There's no way that I'd apologise to that scum of the—" Shizuo stopped in mid-sentence when his mother glared at him, promising him great punishment if he didn't do as she says. Shizuo bit the inside of his cheeks in aggravation. At his mother's expectant clearing of her throat, Shizuo turned around to face Izaya, who to his chagrin, smiled mischievously at him. There was no doubt in his mind that Izaya was the one who called his mother here and fed some kind of lie to her. Despite that, he still apologised grudgingly.
"Sorry."
"Shizuo, be more sincere in your apology!" said Namiko in dismay.
"Yes! Your mother's right. I don't want this kind of apology!" goaded Izaya as he put his hands on his hips. Shizuo punched the round next to him, the ground caving in at the force of the punch, but he couldn't do anything to that flea. Not until his mother was gone.
"Shizuooo?" asked his mother in a warning tone.
Blushing at being told off by his mother in public, Shizuo tried his best to not look around him at the gawking crowd. He took a deep breath and muttered again. "Sorry, Izaya-kun…"
At the public apology, Izaya was ecstatic that he finally got Shizuo where he wanted him, but he was still not satisfied and wanted to tease Shizuo more.
"I'm sorry~ I can't hear you!"
"Izaya, you retard! You heard me already! There's no need to…"
Shizuo could feel the piercing glance his mother sent to his back and shivered involuntarily.
"I'm sorry…" said Shizuo in a louder voice.
"For what?"
Shizuo bit his lips in frustration; his face reddening in a whole new different shade. However he replied anyway. "I'm sorry for calling you a fucking flea and a retard…"
"And…?"
"…" Shizuo glared daggers at his most hated person in the world.
"Shizuo, apologise properly!" said Namiko from the back.
"…I'm also sorry for calling you the scum of the earth, though you deserved it."
"Shizuo!" cried his mother as she walked forward and lightly hit her son on the left shoulder.
"I'm sorry for calling you bad names, okay! I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" shouted Shizuo at the top of his lungs. Fuck, he's so embarrassed, he would crawl into a hole if he could find one right now. The fact that Izaya was howling in laughter in front of him didn't help him feel better.
In his embarrassment, he looked to his left to see his mother crouching next to him with a relieved smile on her face. She pinched both sides of his cheeks and cooed.
"Aww~ That's my Shizu-poo…Such a nice boy!"
At the statement, Shizuo blushed furiously. Forget finding a hole to crawl in! Heck, he'd punch a hole in the ground himself if he had to!
At the background, Izaya was rolling on the road, cackling madly and kicking the air. "Kuha! 'Shizu-poo'! That's so precious!~ Ahahahahaha!"
Shizuo snapped.
"SHUT IT!"
He didn't know how it got to this, and he didn't even want to remember why. But currently, his mother had made him prostrate himself in the middle of the street, in front of the idiot flea of all people, and apologise for every single bad thing he had ever done to the flea in the course of their 'friendship'. For both true and made-up situations.
He didn't even know why Kasuka was there, holding his head down to the ground with a firm hold, since their mother didn't want him to get back up until Izaya was satisfied with his apologies. The only thing that made the whole ordeal better to Shizuo was how Kasuka would rub his head in encouragement every time he felt like sobbing with every apology uttered. At some point, Shizuo really did cry in humiliation, but he was too far gone to even save his dignity anymore, lest he faces the wrath of his mother.
"Be patient, brother…I'll buy you some pudding when this is over."
Shizuo sniffed from the ground. "Guh…thanks Kasuka…I must look really uncool now."
Kasuka smiled a little. "You're still my brother."
"HEY, HEY, HEY! What's with the brotherly love? I'm not finished yet, Shizu-chan!~" said Izaya. He was clearly enjoying this moment to the fullest and he's not going to waste even a single second of it.
"Tch! What more, fle-Izaya?!"
"Apologise for the time you crushed my contacts under your huge feet!"
"You don't wear contacts, you asshole!"
"I do too, I do too! So apologise!"
"Shizu-poo…it's not good to get mad when apologising!"
"Sorry, mom…" Shizuo mumbled. He sighed heavily. "…Sorry for crushing your contacts with my huge feet…"
"And say sorry for always making me your gopher and threatening to crush me into a pulp if I don't follow your orders!"
"Shizu-poo! I'm disappointed in you! I didn't raise you to be such a bully!" cried Namiko.
Shizuo looked to the side at his mother. "But moooom! He was lying! I didn't do all those stuff he said!"
Namiko shook her head in disappointment. "Look at you! You're 24 and you still act like this! Where did I ever go wrong?"
"Now, now, Namiko-san. Don't be too harsh on Shizu-chan. He can't help it," consoled Izaya as he hugged the woman and patted her back.
"I'm so sorry, Orihara-san. Shizu-poo has been so harsh on you!"
"Please, call me Izaya," said Izaya with a fake smile as he let go of Namiko. He turned back to Shizuo. "Well, Shizu-chan! If you can do this apology sincerely, I'll make that the last apology you ever need to say for today!"
"…This guy's acting could give me a run for my money…" whispered Kasuka into his brother's ears; to which Shizuo replied with an exasperated, "Tell me about it…"
"Well, Shizu-chan~ I'm waiting!"
Shizuo took a peek to the crowd who were still ogling at him and saw something good. Good, they've finally arrived!, thought Shizuo. He smirked and said, "Well, I would…but two can play at this game."
"Whatever do you mean, Shizu-chan~ Don't tell me you're going to go against your mom's wishes and really beat me into a pulp? You'd break her heart again, Shizu-chan!" teased Izaya.
"Laugh all you want, flea. But I didn't think that you'd actually be thinking the same thing as me!" Shizuo challenged.
"Hey! That was uncalled for. Apologise! I demand an apology, Shizu-chan!"
Shizuo smirked. "I called her yesterday! Didn't think you'd do the same thing as me. What a surprise!"
Shizuo wished he could see the slowly changing expression on Izaya's face when someone spoke out, but alas, his head is still pressed to the tarred road. He'll just settle with his imagination then…
"Iza-chan! What are you doing?" said a shrill voice from the crowd.
"M-Mother?!" said the surprised informant when he turned around as his mother walked forward with his twin sisters in tow.
"Pfft…Iza-chan? How precious!" laughed Shizuo from the ground. Kasuka, who was still holding his brother's head down didn't say anything. But the small twitch of the corner of his lips sent Izaya to a raging fit.
"WELL AT LEAST IT'S NOT SOMETHING LIKE 'IZA-POO', YOU MONSTER!"
"Iza-chan! Mind your language!"
"Sorry, mother…"
A/N : Aaaaand, done! I hope I managed to get some laugh out of you…