I have written a couple of Spike/Xander oneshots, but this is the first time I'm posting one in here. As this isn't my main pairing of choice, I hope you guys would like it.

Xander had never been so relieved to see anyone in his life as Buffy gave him a hug, asking all kinds of questions about how he spent his summer, wanting to know what he did, where he went. There was no way he could tell her everything, but he could at least give some of the truth.

"Basically, I got as far as Oxnard and the engine fell out of my car, and that was literally. So, I ended up washing dishes at 'The Fabulous Ladies Night Club' for about a month and a half, while I tried to pay for the repairs. No one really bothered me or even spoke to me, until one night when one of the male strippers called in sick and no power on this earth will make me tell you the rest of that story. Suffice to say, I traded my car in for one that wasn't entirely made of rust, came trundling back home to the arms of my loving parents, where everything was exactly as it was, except I sleep in the basement and I have to pay rent. How's college?"

Buffy raised her eyebrows, a smile forming on her face. "Male strippers?"

Xander should have known that would be the one thing she'd take notice of out of his speech. He wanted to avoid this particular conversation for as long as he could, but there was one thing that made the summer worth it.

"Get your ass out there, Harris! We're not paying you to just stand around."

"You're paying me to be a dishwasher. I didn't realize getting naked was in the job description," he mumbled to himself, taking a deep breath before going out on stage, where he could see lots of bright lights, and women screaming at him to take his clothes off. "I so didn't sign on for this." Xander started gyrating on stage, very slowly removing his shirt and throwing it out to the audience. He undid his belt, sliding it through the loops of his pants, which came off soon after, so he was in nothing but the thong they made him wear. It was beyond uncomfortable, and he now had a new respect for women who decided to wear one on a daily basis. He danced around the pole in the middle of the stage, rubbing against it and wishing that a black hole would decide to open up right there, but there was no such luck. Xander was saved when the lights went out, and he knew it was someone else's turn to take the stage, not wasting any time before heading to the back, quickly putting on a robe. "That was the most embarrassing experience of my life."

A man chuckled. "You get used to it. Not bad for a rookie."

Xander shook his head. "I need to get out of here," he said, heading through the back door and outside to the alley, inhaling the fresh air, which wasn't as fresh as he thought. Xander took in a whiff of cigarette smoke, coughing up what was left of his lungs.

"Fancy meeting you here, whelp."

He cringed, knowing that voice all too well. "Spike, and so my night is complete. What the hell are you doing at a male strip club? Having trouble figuring out your sexuality?"

Spike glared at him, throwing his fag to the ground and stomping on it. "If you must know, I came here with Dru. She gets off on this sort of thing, but she bailed, leaving me all on my lonesome and you know what? I don't even fucking care. I've had it with that crazy bint. I came back for her, and she just tosses me away. Well, it's her bloody loss; I'm nobody's nancy boy. I think the better question is, what are you doing here? Finally got tired of being the Slayer's lackey? I saw your little dance, have to admit, it was quite impressive."

Xander was stunned that the vampire actually gave him a compliment, in his own twisted way. "This has nothing to do with Buffy; I just needed to make some quick cash. It was just a one time thing, and I'm officially done. I'm going home." He turned to open the door, only to find that it was locked. "Shit, my clothes are in there. This is just not my night."

Spike laughed. "That's something we have in common, then." He walked over to his car, handing Xander a flask. "I think you could use this more than me."

Xander didn't hesitate before taking a long sip of the whiskey, feeling it burn his throat, but it was oddly refreshing. "Thanks, don't happen to have any extra clothes in there, do you?" One thing he never thought he would do was ask a vampire to borrow clothes, but he was desperate at the moment.

"Sorry, everything I had is back at the lair I was sharing with Drusilla, but there's no way I'm setting foot in that pit again. You'll just have to settle with what you have on."

Xander groaned. "Just great, shouldn't be hard to get a cab now."

Spike grinned, licking his lips. "The night doesn't have to be a complete waste. The place closes soon; someone is bound to open that door eventually. And seeing as how I have nowhere else to go, you'll just have to wait here with me. I promise not to bite, much."

Xander gulped at the look he was giving him, moving to rest his head against the alley wall. "I guess I don't have much of a choice, just keep your teeth to yourself."

Spike leaned closer to him, pretending to bite, but instead of vamping out, he slid his hands under Xander's robe. "You didn't say anything about the rest of my body."

He let out an unmanly squeal when Spike squeezed his cock, jumping away from him. "Hey, no touching at all. I'll have Buffy stake you."

"Oh, big words," Spike mocked. "What's the Slayer gonna do to me? She's not even here. I think it's pretty pathetic that you have to hide behind a little girl to fight your battles for you. Are you a man or not, Harris? From what I felt a second ago, I would say you have a pretty nice package. The time will go by faster if you give in. I'm bloody bored here."

"Well, that's just too bad for you. I won't have you use me because you're bored, and recently dumped."

Spike rolled his eyes. "We would be using each other. Come on, how long has it been? Have you even been shagged before?"

He scoffed, puffing up his chest. "Of course I have, I had sex with Faith last year. She's a Slayer, you know."

Spike was impressed. "Banged a Slayer, did you? I was wrong about you, Harris. Maybe you're not such a pansy, after all. But I guarantee, that's nothing compared to what I could do to you."

Before Xander could respond, Spike's lips met his in a passionate embrace, the robe flew off and was flung to the ground, but he found it very hard to care.

Spike fondled and caressed his balls, kneeling down before Xander and taking him entirely in his mouth.

Xander groaned, shutting his eyes in pure bliss. "Fuck, that feels amazing. Suck me hard."

Spike was happy to oblige, lightly biting the tip of his erection with his blunt teeth, which was all Xander needed as he spurt his cum down his throat, and Spike made sure to drink it all up, licking his lips in the process. "Bloody delicious," he said with a grin, "but we're nowhere near finished yet."

Xander immediately found himself facing the wall, a horny vampire at his backside. He didn't know what was going on, but vaguely heard a zipper being pulled down.

"I don't have lotion or anything like that on me, so I hope you can take the pain. I promise to make it good for you."

All Xander could do was nod as he felt the head of Spike's cock enter his ass, taking in a deep breath when the vampire buried himself fully inside. This was new for him, but it was a surprisingly pleasurable experience, once the pain wore off a bit.

Spike pounded his ass hard, delighted in the sounds of the other man's moans. "You're so fucking tight, a bloke could get used to this." It was like nothing he'd felt before, not even Angelus' ass was this tight, and the sounds Harris made were enough to completely turn him on, his cock hard and aching.

"God, Spike, right there. Fuck me harder, I can take it."

He was never one to deny what his partner wanted, making his thrusts hard and fast, until he came inside the boy's tight hole, breathing heavily, which he didn't need to do. Spike pulled out of Xander a second later, just as the back door opened and voices filled the night air, looked like the club was officially closing.

Xander hurriedly snatched up his robe, putting it back on and giving Spike a look. "This never happened, okay? It stays between us. I'm going home, and we'll never have to see each other again."

Spike knew he would react that way, shrugging in response. "You do that, but just know this; you'll never be able to have a normal life again after what we did. You'll spend every night thinking about me, wishing you could have had more. Every girl you even think about shoving your dick inside won't be able to measure up; they'll never be able to give you what you need, what you crave. I'm in your blood now, and there's no getting rid of me. Have a nice life, Harris."

He watched as Spike got in his car, and then drove away, leaving Xander to wonder if there was any truth to his words.

Xander came back to reality, shaking his head at Buffy's question. There were just some things he would never tell about his summer.

"No power on this earth."