Uh huh ... extra cheese Uh huh, uh huh ... save a piece for me
Cowgirl Bella walked into the saloon and demanded a piece of pizza. Jacob, the bartender told her there was a pizza party at the Cullens'. Bella left to go to the Cullens'.
Pizza party at your house I went just to check it out Nineteen extra larges What a shame No one came
The Cullens were vampires so Bella was the only one who came. The Cullens felt very sad, because they can't eat food so they forced Bella to take the pizzas home.
Just us eatin' all alone
You said, "Take the pizza home"
"No sense lettin' all this go to waste"
So then I faced
Pizza all day And every day This cheese 'round the clock Is gettin' me blocked And I sure don't care For irregularity
She had a rough time being a criminal cause she always had to make bathroom runs. It was very uncomfortable.
Tell me
Why'd you have to go and make me so constipated?
'Cause right now I'd do anything to just get my bowels evacuated
In the bathroom ... I sit and I wait and I strain
And I sweat and I clench and I feel the pain
Oh, should I take laxatives or have my colon irrigated?
No no no
Bella ran to the Cullens' house, but to her dismay they had left.
I was feelin' pretty down 'Till my girlfriend came around We're just so alike in every way I gotta say
"Eric Yorkie, my girlfriend"
Bella hugged Eric.
In fact, I just thought I might Pop the question there that night I was kissing her so tenderly But woe is me
She had stolen a ring to propose to Eric Yorkie.
Who would have guessed Her family crest I'd suddely spy Tattooed on her thigh And son-of-a-gun It's just like the one on me Bella became depressed an emo and went off to rob a saloon.
Tell me
How was I supposed to know we were both related?
Believe me, if I knew she was my cousin we never would have dated
What to do now? Should I go ahead and propose
And get hitched and have kids with eleven toes
And move to Alabama where that kind of thing is tolerated?
No no no no no no no
No no no no no no no
No no no no no
They couldn't move to Alabama because they lived in the wild, wild west (37!) and Alabama hadn't been invented yet.
I had so much on my mind I thought maybe I'd unwind Try out that new roller coaster ride And the guide
...who was named Renee. Bella was very happy roller coasters had been invented last tuesday.
Said not to stand But that's a demand That I couldn't meet I got on my feet And stood up instead And knocked off my head, you see
Luckily, she had a cowgirl hat so no one could tell she was headless. But it made robbing saloons so difficult.
Tell me
Why'd I have to go and get myself decapitated?
This really is a major inconvenience, oh man, I really hate it
Such a drag, now ... Can't eat, I can't breathe, I can't snore
I can't belch or yodel anymore
Can't spit or blow my nose or even read Sports Illustrated
Bella ran to the Cullens' because this was all their fault. Luckily she found them in a saloon.
"Cullens! Y'all made me lose ma' head"
A distraught Bella sat down in what she thought was an empty chair, but really the stove.
Oh no
Why'd I have to go and get myself all mutilated? (yeah, yeah)
I gotta tell ya, life without a head kinda makes me irritated
What a bummer
Can't blink, I can't cough, I can't sneeeze
But my neck is enjoyin' a pleasant breeze now
Haven't been the same since my head and I were separated
No no no
Luckily, Edward saved her and they fell in love and she got her head back and became a vampire the end.