I still couldn't believe it. Even though I was sitting in front of their graves, I couldn't believe it. I refused to even try.
It was just one day after the Mutant War started and the Sentinels were mobilized, and only a day after every last one of my friends died in a single horrific battle. I'm still not sure how I even survived the fight. I think it was because I was able to faze through most of their attacks. I had thought for sure Logan would have survived, he was the strongest of us all. But he was gone, I watched him die and couldn't do anything about it, and the proof was sitting right in front of me in the form of his grave. But despite that I couldn't believe it. I refused to.
I sat in front of all their graves in what used to be the Xavier mansion. I stared at nothing, I thought of nothing, and I felt nothing. And I welcomed the nothingness that surrounded me. It was better than feeling the overwhelming sadness I had felt after Jean had accidentally killed herself yesterday. There I was, thinking that I at least had Jean left and she would make everything right again, but then she went mad with grief and lost control. I'm amazed I haven't done the very same thing.
I guess what kept me sane was that I wasn't as alone as I felt. Lance and Wanda had survived to. I didn't know how, and I didn't care. After the battle they stayed and helped me bury the fallen X-Men. I was thankful for that, but right now I continued to feel nothing. It kept the pain at bay.
"Kitty?" I didn't acknowledge the voice behind me. I knew who he was and I wasn't about to let go of the blissful nothingness just yet. Lance sighed and stepped up beside me. "… Wanda went searching for survivors." He added sitting down beside me. Another thing I couldn't believe. Lance and Wanda had stayed behind after the battle. I imagined they would hightail it out of here first chance they got. But they stayed with me.
"What's the point." I mumbled quietly. Jean's final surge of power had wiped out what little was left of Bayville after the Sentinels were done with it. Nothing was left standing and Bayville was reduced to rubble. I was still amazed we survived.
"Wanda said some mutants might have escaped through the sewers. Also said she'd try to be back before sunset."
"What's the point." I repeated with a little more strength in my voice. "There's nothing left to come back to. Why are you so sure she'll return?"
"Because she has no where else to go. None of us do."
"But there's nothing left here. The institute is gone and so are the X-Men along with the Professor. Everything is gone." I said miserably bringing my legs up against my chest and resting my chin on them.
"Just remember that you're not the only one who's lost everything in that fight Kitty." Lance said with a hint of bitterness lacing his tone. I glanced over at my sole companion for the first time since he arrived, a guilty expression on my face. That had completely slipped my mind. The Brotherhood and Magneto had fought in the 'Battle of Bayville' as Wanda called it as well. They, like the X-Men, had all perished.
"Sorry." I muttered returning to staring at nothing.
"It's alright. It's not your fault." I suddenly felt a flare at anger at his words. He was right, this wasn't my fault. And I turned to glare at him to tell him just that.
"You're right, this isn't my fault, its yours!" I shouted jumping to my feet. Lance stared up at me like I was crazy.
"What?" He asked standing up as well.
"This is your fault! You as well as mutants like you!" I screamed clenching my fists at my sides. Anger was almost as good as feeling nothing. And like everyone who gets angry, I needed someone to take it out on.
"What do you mean 'mutants like me'?" He repeated with a glare.
"Mutants like you who are always causing trouble for mutants like me! All you did was cause trouble and strut around like you were king of the world and could do anything you wanted to! All I wanted to do, all the X-Men wanted to do, was help people and be accepted! But you just had to ruin that and make a bad name for all mutants who didn't deserve it! You started this war! This is all your fault!" My voice began to waver and I could feel tears stinging my eyes once more. Lance noticed this and lost his glare replacing it with a frown.
"Kitty…" He said gently. But I didn't want to hear it.
"Shut up!" I screamed and, without warning, swung my fist at his face. He wasn't expecting that and I was able to sock him clean in the face with enough force that he stumbled back a bit. I could feel the tears pouring down my face now as Lance straitened up and frowned at me once more.
"Kitty it's not my fault." He said firmly. I swung another punch at him, but Lance was prepared this time and easily caught my wrist.
"Yes it is! It's your fault my friends are all dead!" I screamed in his face with more and more tears rolled down my cheeks. I swung my other fist at him which he easily caught one more. I kicked and screamed demanding that he let me go, but Lance simply stood there frowning at me. At some point I finally gave up hanging my head and sobbing loudly. My hands went limp in Lance's grip and he released me, but I didn't have the strength to hold myself up and fell against him. I fisted my hands in his tattered old uniform and sobbed into his chest while he absently wrapped his arms tightly around me. Lance, once one of my enemies, was giving me comfort.
I'm not sure how long we stood like that. Eventually I had stopped crying, but Lance hadn't let me go yet. I was almost glad he didn't. But soon we broke apart when we heard someone clear their throat loudly.
"Am I interrupting something?" I couldn't help but smile slightly and turn my head towards the voice the belonged to none other than the Scarlet Witch herself. She didn't look irritated, but she didn't look very thrilled either. Just neutral standing a few feet away from us, arms crossed over her chest and staring at us suspiciously.
"Wanda." Lance greeted with a small smile.
"Lance." She said unfolding her arms and walking up to us.
"Find anything?" Lance asked hopefully. Wanda sighed and shook her head.
"Nothing." She answered bitterly. Lance and I both frowned.
"What I tell you?" I muttered.
"… Well what do we do now? We can't stay here for much longer." Lance asked motioning to the pile of ruble around us.
"I don't know but you're right. We can't stay here forever." Wanda agreed looking off to the setting sun. "It's starting to get dark. I say we stay here one more night and leave town tomorrow. We can figure out what to do then. In the meantime let's gather up some wood to make a fire." She added walking off towards the ruined building. Lance and I glanced at each other and shrugged. He went off to help Wanda collect some firewood, but I called him back.
"Hey, Lance." I said quickly putting my hand on his shoulder. He stopped and turned his head to stare at me quizzically.
"Yeah?" He asked. I sighed and stared down at my feet.
"I'm… sorry." I mumbled. Lance merely smiled and nodded.
"I know." He said. And with that he left to help Wanda dig through the ruble.
Smiling slightly I returned to the place where we had made camp the night before close to the cliff side. I didn't know where I would go from here, but I knew I wouldn't have to go alone. We three were the only survivors of the Battle of Bayville, and despite past differences we were going to stick together. I would make sure of that.
A couple hours later it was fully dark. I sat across from Wanda with the small fire we had built a while ago being the only thing between us. Despite it being dark Lance insisted on going off to find some food down on the beach. It seemed the ocean and the beach was the only thing that remained untouched by the beginning of the war. I glanced up at Wanda when I heard her sigh to see her frowning at the fire. It was beginning to dim and she tossed what looked like a table leg into the pit causing it to flare up.
"… You ok?" I asked worriedly when she continued to frown at the fire.
"Yeah. I'm fine." She answered slowly. "It's just that… I don't know what to do anymore."
"Hey come on, it's not like it's the end of the world." I tried to cheer her up with a tiny smile forgetting my own depression for a minute.
"It feels like it." She muttered bitterly.
"Tell me about it." I sighed leaning back on my elbows to stare up at the clear night sky.
"Well Bayville can only be the first of dozens of cities to get attacked by the Sentinels. No doubt the whole world will look like this soon. And it's all that bastard Trask's fault." Wanda grumbled making me smirk slightly.
"That was a rhetorical question." I pointed out. She shot me a glare over the fire.
"Whatever. Its true and you know it." I was about to say something else when I heard footsteps behind me. Turning my head I saw Lance walk into the light of the fire, a sullen expression on his face.
"You didn't find any food?" I asked.
"Nope. Nothing." Lance sighed sitting down beside me.
"We definitely have to leave tomorrow." Wanda sighed.
"We've run into this problem already. Where are we going to go?" Wanda stared into the fire again with a thoughtful expression.
"After the fight it looked like the Sentinels left in every direction. They could be anywhere by now. The world is at war now, humans against mutants. If we get spotted we either get killed or captured. Neither option sounds very pleasant to me." She muttered.
"So we need to go somewhere isolated where it wont be easy for them to find us?"
"No. Soon Sentinels will be patrolling the skies on the look out for mutants. It would be easy for them to spot us if we were alone and hiding."
"So, what, we need to go someplace swarming with people?" I asked skeptically. "The Sentinels don't care if they spot a mutant in a group of humans. They'll destroy anything that gets in their way."
"Somehow I doubt Trask would let that happen. He let the Sentinels go all out on us because we were a threat. A strong and experienced threat. He might be a bit more careful when picking off mutants on the street. In fact he might not send the sentinels out at all if there are a lot of humans around."
"Then we go somewhere where there's a lot of people and try to blend in?" Lance asked. Wanda shrugged and nodded.
"It would seem like that's our nest bet."
"But here's another question. What do we do once we get to a safe place?" I asked. Wanda shrugged again.
"Try to stay alive and not cause trouble I guess."
"We can't just sit around and do nothing though!" I shouted.
"Kitty calm down. We'll figure out what to do once we get to a safe place." Lance said from beside me. I glared and him, then at Wanda who glared right back but stayed silent.
"Fine." I grumbled crossing my arms with a huff.
"One thing's for sure though. No matter what, we have to stick together." Wanda added quietly. Lance and I both nodded in our agreement. "We'll figure out where we'll go tomorrow because right now I'm exhausted." She added folding her hands behind her head and falling back on the dirt.
"Same here." Lance said with a yawn and laid back as well shutting his eyes tightly. I sat there for a few moments more staring up at the stars lost in thought. 'Scott, Rouge, Jean, Evan, Kurt… I wish you were all here right now. You'd know what to do.' I thought sadly. Tossing another chair leg in the fire I lied down beside Lance and willed for sleep to come.