DISCLAIMER: I own nothing from the 50 Shades Trilogy and no copyright infringement is intended. I do wish Christian was mine though… Yum!
A/N: Hello darlings! So… I was transferring everything from my computer to my new laptop and I stumbled upon this. Seems my brain-frying week erased this little piece of writing from my memory. I had completely forgotten that I'd written this and now I NEED to post it :) I am aware that my other story starts around the time of Ana's pregnancy as well, but both will take very different directions. Thank you to everyone who has reviewed, alerted and favourited Colour Splashes in Our World of Grey. I will respond this week. You rock! I cannot guarantee regular updates because of my and my husband's work schedules but I will try and write as often as I can. I hope you enjoy this!
Chapter One
Morphing Emotions:
Shooting up in bed, I inhale large dosages of air as the tears trickle down my face. What a nightmare! Swiping at the unwelcomed water works I turn my head to the side and notice that it is just past two in the morning. Tossing the duvet back, I rise to my feet and quickly grab onto the edges of the bedside table for support. My trembling limbs are accompanied by a strong wave of nausea. Clasping my hand over my mouth tightly, I stumble to the bathroom as quickly as my shaking, overtired form will carry me and I empty the few contents of my stomach into the toilet.
After what feels like hours, my morning sickness recedes and I rise more steadily to my feet. Flushing the toilet, I make my way over to the sink and hold onto the edge with one hand as I grab my toothbrush with the other. After cleaning the foul taste out of my mouth, I reluctantly look up into the mirror and notice the dark circles under my eyes.
Revealing this news to Christian should have been a happy time. A time where he would sweep me off my feet, twirl me around and then pull me into an all-encompassing embrace, filled with love and excitement. We would celebrate the joy of a new life growing inside me. Instead he flipped out and left to god only knows where, to do god only knows what. My subconscious shakes her head at me with a sad look emanating from her telling me, you knew this would happen if you fell pregnant, while my inner goddess has vanished altogether. So much for your help, I think angrily. Tears of sadness and anger pool in my eyes at the way everything unfolded and quickly, I grab a face cloth to wash away the tears staining my pale face.
Walking back into the bedroom, I glare at the clock which now reads 02:35. Searching the house, I discover that Christian is still out and about. What were you expecting after your news? Racing back up to the bedroom, I grab my Blackberry and check for any word from Christian. No missed calls, no text messages and no emails. My heart plummets and I sink onto the bed. I try calling and his phone rings until it reaches his voicemail.
"Hi… It's me. Where are you? I'm sorry…" swallowing the lump in my throat, I whisper, "Please come home… I love you."
Ending the call, my heart clenches and the tears well up once again as my fingers tighten around my phone. The time when I need you the most and you go and pull a disappearing-fifty-act on me. Where are you, my dear, sweet fifty? My sadness slowly turns to anger as the minutes tick by. Angrily, I throw the phone against the wall and watch with satisfaction as the pieces break apart. See how you feel when you can't reach me. My inner goddess has made an appearance and is glowering at me. He brought it upon himself I tell her with bitterness swirling around my thoughts.
I storm into our walk in closet and pull out a light blue, knee length, halter neck dress. Walking over to the drawers I grab the blue, lace panties that Taylor purchased for me, many months ago. Stomping back to the closet, I grab a pair of light blue and silver heels, really high ones. God, I hope I don't break my neck in these. Walking back to the drawers, I pull out my thigh high, skin-toned stockings and drop ungracefully back onto the bed.
Once I'm dressed, I head over to the mirror and apply some mascara, a touch of eyeliner and some lip gloss. I pull out the bracelet Christian got me for my birthday and tie it around my right wrist. Pulling my hair back into a high ponytail, I swish my head gently from side to side and feel satisfied when the waves lead into a curl and sway sexily. Pinching my cheeks for some colour, I head back into the bedroom and grab a matching handbag.
Dumping the contents and my wallet from one handbag to the other, adding my pregnancy medication into the mix, I quickly zip it up and make my way to the kitchen to grab the keys for my R8. Taylor and Gail look up, shocked at my appearance at this time of the morning. Yes, I can look good too. What the hell are they still doing awake anyway?
"Mrs Grey?" Taylor greets me with a wary and questioning tone.
"Taylor. Gail." I nod as I walk over to the shelf that our keys are placed on.
"Mrs Grey." Gail greets me. Oh, so now I'm Mrs Grey again and not Ana.
Grabbing my car's key off the hook, I turn around and make a hasty retreat out of the kitchen and I watch with satisfaction as both their faces screw up in horror. I race to the elevator and push the button repeatedly. Fuck, what is taking so long? Taylor comes to stand next to me as I wait impatiently for the lift to arrive. My anger is still bubbling just under the surface and seeing Taylor following me makes me explode.
"What the fuck do you want Taylor?" I whisper-shout angrily through clenched teeth and I stare coldly at him. Taylor blanches at my reaction and stutters out a response. None of his staff have ever seen me angry.
"Mrs Grey, my apologies." He stammers, "I am just doing my job." The doors to the elevator open and I give an undignified snort as I step angrily into the confined space. Of course, Taylor steps in next to me and punches in the code to take us down. When we reach the parking, I disregard the dull ache starting in my feet, from stomping in such killer heels, as I march over to my car, shoulders squared and head held high. Unlocking the vehicle, Taylor holds open the door for me and I jump in swiftly, locking the doors again before Taylor can climb in. I fire up the engine and start to open the garage door.
"Mrs Grey?" he asks with a look of pure fear sketched over his facial features and I almost feel bad for him, knowing what Christian is like… almost. Rolling the window down just an inch so that he can hear me, I give him a half apologetic look and tell him, "You can do your job in your own vehicle, Taylor." Turning the window up, I speed out of the garage and into the night. I have no doubt that Mr Grey will be in contact with his security team shortly and get some news he won't be very pleased to hear about. I don't give a shit and quite frankly, I am still too pissed to care who he does and doesn't fire simply because I want to go for a drive, alone. Maybe I can find him before he gets that call. Sure, you keep telling yourself that Steele. My subconscious never lets up.
Ten minutes of speeding has passed and I have landed up where a few bars are scattered around one another and Christian's R8 is parked outside one of them. Realisation dawns on me and I know that we are very close to that paedophile's salon. I take a closer look and notice a vehicle that looks like Elena's, parked right next to Christian's. My jaw drops to the floor, the shaking kicks in and my body freezes as a cold dread settles in my bones. There is no way. He wouldn't do this to me… would he?
Parking my car right behind Christian's, I climb out with grace that only seems to make an appearance in these kinds of situations. I walk over slowly to the bar and take a deep breathe, my heart working double time and pounding frantically beneath my rib cage. As I release the air from my lungs, I peek in through the window and my entire world slows down as I watch the horrific scene unfold before my eyes.
No. No. No. Taking a step back, I stumble on something and almost lose my balance. Righting myself, I continue to stare at them as I walk backwards. Once my feet reach the curb, I turn around and look around frantically for an escape. Noticing a few dark alleyways, I turn around and throw my key towards my car and turn back, running towards one of the pitch-black alleys. I slip into the darkness and push my back against the wall as I inhale sharply and rapidly while the sting of tears race down my cheeks. My breathing is erratic and my body is shaking. I am so cold. Wrapping my arms around myself, my legs give in and I slump to the cold and dirty concrete floor on one side of a huge trash can. Drawing my legs up to my chest, I wrap my arms around my legs instead and rest my head sideways over my arms as I cry silently.
I hear screeching tires and it sounds like it comes from more than one car but I can't be sure. I'm not sure of anything anymore and the distant sounds of shouting and barked orders float around me.
"Her fucking car is here. She must be close. FIND HER!" I hear him shout out and more frenzied activity happens in the distance.
"ANA! Where the fuck are you? ANA!" he shouts repeatedly and the sound of the rising panic in his voice grips me and my entire body starts to convulse as the salty liquid enters my mouth. Breathe, Ana, breathe. Choking on my tears, I try desperately to inhale some much needed oxygen. He said he loved me… He vowed to protect me…
"ANA!"
You promised…
"God, Ana, please!"
"Ana, baby girl. It's Kate. Where are you?"
Katie?
"Mrs Grey!" Taylor's voice rings closer as his footsteps fall nearer to my hiding place.
He can't find me. I'm frozen. He can't find me. I need to get away. He can't find me. I cannot move. Oh god, he is going to find me. Please, don't find me. It's not me. You don't need me… you don't need us. Her… it's her. It's always been her… You need her.
The painful thought that I am not and never have been enough clutches at every fibre of my being and I shatter into a million shards, a strangled sob escaping me. I can't do this. He cannot find me.
Staring up into the dark, night sky I send out a silent prayer for somebody to end this nightmare that I cannot escape from. As I allow my eyes to drop back towards the ground, I quickly scramble to my feet, my swollen eyes locking onto Taylor's relieved yet wary ones.
"Mrs Grey?" He says loudly, too loudly.
"No, Taylor." I whisper-sob and mustering up as much strength as my body is capable of at this time, I swiftly push Taylor against his chest and watch with satisfaction as he stumbles a few steps backwards, giving me the necessary space to escape.
Slipping through the gap, I bolt out of the alley and into the street, colliding with something hard. My knees buckle and I inhale sharply. Christian! No, no, no. The unbidden memory of what I witnessed mere minutes ago floats into my mind. He doesn't want me. It's her.
"Ana, oh thank god." He lets out a relieved breath that has a trace of bourbon to it and encases me tightly in his arms. I struggle to break free. I am vaguely aware that I am kicking and screaming and crying at the top of my lungs for him to release me but it's too much. Everything is just too much and my body is on sensory overload. I watch as the darkness creeps in around me while people un-focus in my line of vision. My body sags in his strong hold and I give myself over to the inviting nothingness.
"Ana!"
A/N: And there you have it! So… What do you think? Would you like longer chapters or does this length cut it? Let me know! Have a fabulous week and don't let work/ school nail you to the ground :) Xxxx