A: I do not own Slayers. I'm just having a bit of fun.

Zel grabbed his copy of The History of the Claire Bible and quickly found the chapter where he had left off. On the bed beside his Gourry sat polishing his sword. Zel could count on one hand the number of times the swordsman could be troubled to read a book before bed. Usually he tended to his supplies before hitting the sack. To each their own.

In the room beside theirs, Zel could hear the women settling into bed. He strived not to eavesdrop, but some nights they were easier to block out than others. This night would prove to not be one of them.

"What are you reading, Miss Lina?' he heard Amelia ask dimly through the wall.

"The Monster Race: Myths, Legends, and Reality." Lina replied.

"Oh, wow." Amelia replied, mystified, "You always read about such dense subjects. Why don't you read something light for a change?"

"Amelia, compared to The Intricacies of Black Magic: A Book for the Expert Sorcerer, this is light reading!" Lina exclaimed.

Zel noticed a small smile pull on Gourry's lips, and realized that he was not the only one who could hear what was being said.

"It's all non-fiction, though." Amelia persisted.

"Yes, so?"

"Don't you ever read fiction?"

"Well, a long time ago I did."

"Didn't you like it?"

"I guess. Then I just started to read non-fiction more. It's no use spending so much time reading something that doesn't expand your knowledge and can be useful is what I figured."

"But fiction can be useful." Amelia cried.

"Amelia, what's so useful about…The Pirate King and Princess Justina Justice?" Lina asked in exasperation.

Zel and Gourry exchanged a smile. "Princess Justina Justice?" Gourry mouthed.

"Typical Amelia." Zel sighed, only to turn purple by what Amelia said next in an uncannily matter of fact manner.

"Well, for one thing you can learn a lot of ways to pleasure a man."

"WHAT!" Lina yelled.

"You should read it, it might give you some ideas for whenever you and Mr. Gourry…"

"Me and who and what!?" Lina exclaimed.

Now it was Gourry's turn to blush crimson. The boys sat on their respective beds deliberately avoiding eye contact, wondering if they should let the women know they were hearing every word they said before accidently overhearing anymore awkward conversations. Zel decided it would be safer to leave. He stood and made a few steps to the door when he heard Amelia say, "Listen, here's a good bit."

She cleared her throat and continued: "The Pirate King deepened his kiss, pulling Justina Justice closer to him as she ran her fingers down his finely chiseled chest to the place where…"

"I don't want to know!" Lina screamed. The sounds of the pitter-patter of footfalls running to the door followed. A loud banging sound hit their ears as the door to Amelia and Linas' room opened and slammed. As Lina's footsteps rebounded through the hallway, Zel, with his hand on the door handle to his room exchanged an awkward glance with Gourry. Amelia could be heard muttering, "Oh well, her loss."

Gourry stood up and solemnly clasped Zel on the shoulder and said, "You, my friend, will be a very lucky man one day."