This story grew out of a discussion on PKSP, about how much better "Dark Frontier" would have been, if only it had been Steve and Terri Irwin (of
The Crocodile Hunter) stalking the Borg, instead of the Hansens. (Steve [poking drone with stick]: "Come 'ere, mate, let's have a look at you. Aren't you a beauty? Ooh, you're a little bit grumpy...") I started thinking about how other such shows might play out with a Voyager influence. This Old Starship, with Bob Vila blundering through the Jeffries Tubes? From Neelix's Kitchen? Emergency Holograms? Of course, being an inveterate P/Ker, the one I ended up doing was A Wedding Story.(
A Wedding Story is a series on TLC which tells the story of a real couple's courtship and wedding, using interview clips of the bride, groom, and their friends and families, along with footage of wedding preparations and the actual ceremony.)
Rating: PG
Codes: P/K
Date Posted: 25 December 1999
Summary: Star Trek: Voyager meets A Wedding Story.
Schmaltz warning. I'm hoping I can get away with it, since it's Christmas. :-)
Characters and situations owned by Paramount/Viacom. Used without permission. No copyright infringement intended. Song lyrics adapted from "Wedding Song (There Is Love)" by Noel Paul Stookey.
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by Shayney
Your presence is requested at the wedding of
We actually met before we got on Voyager.
In a sleazy bar on Deep Space Nine. It figures it
would be in a bar.
If there's one thing I learned in New Zealand, it
was to mind my own business. Not to get involved.
But I turned around, and there he was. This sweet-faced kid who didn't look old enough to even be in a
bar. Getting scammed by a Ferengi. One of the
oldest scams in the book, too, I might add. I just
couldn't sit by and let him get suckered.
He rescued me. A total stranger who, as far as
he knew, he'd never see again. That's Tom. Always
first into the fray if someone needs help.
He followed me around like a puppy after that.
I...well, I wasn't the most popular guy on Voyager
back then, so I didn't mind. And we just...clicked.
I've never had such a good friend.
But it was years before I finally asked him out.
He was so damned young. I felt like Mrs. Robinson.
(What? Oh, just a historical reference, Neelix.) And
he had a homeworld honey, see. It wasn't until he got
a letter from his parents telling him Libby had
married someone else that he gave up on her. I made
my move then, but I guess it was too soon.
Our first date was pretty much a disaster. I
took him to the holodeck, and ran my "parking"
program. Very romantic. A vintage '57 Chevy
convertible, parked on a ridge with a breathtaking
view, sexy music on the radio. Almost never fails.
But he didn't get it. He sort of liked the music, but he
was bored just sitting there parked. He wanted to go
somewhere or do something. I tried to put my arm
around him, get cozy, but he was too antsy to sit still.
I ended up giving him a driving lesson instead.
This is sort of embarrassing. I think I loved
Tom, but, um...I didn't know it yet. I thought that
was the most boring holoprogram I ever saw in my
life. I couldn't believe he wanted to waste his
holodeck time just sitting there.
That was the final straw. Lately, he'd been
acting so strange. Sometimes almost manically
excited, sometimes so quiet and withdrawn. I
thought he might be sick or something. So I went to
talk to the Doctor....
Yes, in a way you could say that I'm
responsible for getting Ensigns Paris and Kim
together. Mr. Kim came to consult with me about
Mr. Paris' odd behavior. As soon as he described the
"weird holoprogram," I was able to diagnose the
"problem."
You don't know how mortifying it was to have
to have a hologram explain it to me. It's just that
we'd been friends so long, it never occurred to me....
But I went to Tom, and told him I wanted to try his
holoprogram again. It was, uh, a lot more fun the
second time.
We've been together ever since. Finally I
proposed to him. In a turbolift. Romantic, huh?
Yeah, well, it wasn't quite how I planned it.
I wanted everything to be perfect. Absolutely
perfect. But somehow it never worked out.
Something always happened. The first time, I invited
him to my quarters for dinner. I had it all planned.
The meal, the wine, what I was going to say. Only
my replicator broke down, and Harry spent most of
the evening fixing it. I tried to suggest that we go to
his quarters and eat there, but he's so compulsive. I
knew even if I succeeded in dragging him off, he'd be
distracted, thinking about what could be wrong with
the replicator.
So I tried again, this time when we were on an
away mission. Beautiful planet, routine supply
acquisition - and out of contact with Voyager for
two days. Just me, Harry, a shuttlecraft, and a
gourmet picnic. It was perfect. Until we got a call
from one of the other teams. Ayala had fallen out of
a tree, and I was the only medic on the planet.
Nothing the Doc couldn't handle, but I had to stay
with him until Voyager got back.
The third time, I planned an evening on the
holodeck. My favorite restaurant on Risa, much
fancier than Sandrine's. We were just about to order
when the call came over the comm: "All senior
officers to the bridge." We ended the program and
raced to the turbolift. Harry was amused, thinking
about the looks we'd get, taking our stations in our
formalwear, but I was beginning to think the universe
was conspiring against me. So I proposed, there in
the turbolift. In case I never got another chance. He
must have thought I was nuts, but he said yes, and we
stepped out onto the bridge grinning like fools. I
don't even remember what we were called to the
bridge for now.
Yes, it was Tom who proposed. It's Tom who
wanted to get married. It's Tom who wanted a real
wedding. He teases me about being old-fashioned
and sentimental, but he's a lot worse than I am. I
never felt the need for formal sanction and public
recognition of our bond. We know how we feel, and
that's what counts. But Tom...tradition means a lot to
him. More than he'll admit. And if it makes him
happy, I'll go along.
Well, within limits....
TWO WEEKS BEFORE THE WEDDING:
HARRY'S QUARTERS
"I'm going to ask Tuvok to be my attendant."
"Tuvok? I figured you'd pick B'Elanna."
"I would, but you're picking her."
"I am? Okay, I am." She would have been his
first choice, except he thought Harry was going to ask
her.
"Tuvok's been a mentor to me ever since I came
aboard. A substitute father, almost." Harry grinned.
"And he's always....tolerated you."
"Oh, shut up and help me plan the ceremony."
"I agreed to a wedding if you planned it," Harry
protested.
"I will, but I want to honor your heritage. You
know, some Chinese or Korean wedding customs."
"Most of my family's been in South Carolina
for generations."
"Don't you have any special traditions at
your family weddings?"
Harry thought for a moment. "Well...my
cousin got married just before I was stationed to
Voyager. She and her husband were big Clemson
Tigers fans. They decorated everything in purple and
orange, with pawprints. Just like her parents did at
their wedding."
"I'm serious, Harry."
"So am I. Sports is a religion in my family.
Especially Clemson."
"Purple and orange pawprints aren't quite what
I had in mind."
"Well, check the cultural database, then."
"Good idea." Tom worked at the computer for
a moment. "Chinese tea ceremony?"
"No way."
"Oh, here's an interesting Korean custom. The
groom's friends tie him up and beat him with a stick."
"Forget it."
"That's your problem, Harry, you just have no
sense of adventure."
"Maybe for my next marriage."
"Oh, here's a good one. No, really, come look.
It's an old Japanese and Korean wedding custom that
symbolizes unity and dedication."
Harry leaned over Tom's shoulder, looking at
the terminal. "I should have known it would involve
booze," he teased. "But yeah, it is a good one."
B'Elanna:
To tell you the truth, I really didn't want to give
the toast - even though I'm their best friend and it's
traditional for the best friend of the couple to do the
honors. I was really, really flattered that they asked,
but I hate public speaking. Especially at fancy
parties. But they blackmailed me. Harry said that if I
didn't agree to do it, he'd ask Tuvok. The rest of the
guests would never forgive me if I let that happen.
So I said yes.
Captain Janeway:
Under normal circumstances, a married couple
would not be allowed to serve together on a ship as
small as Voyager. At the very least, I'd be
expected to separate them, so they weren't working
together.
But these aren't normal circumstances.
Transfers aren't an option, and we don't have any
staff to spare. I consider it one of the benefits of
being out here in the Delta Quadrant. They're part of
a great team on the bridge; it would be a shame to
separate them. Out here, I don't have to.
Chakotay:
I have to admit, I had my doubts at first. Tom
and Harry bonded instantly, but they seemed so
mismatched. Harry's quiet, Tom's loud. Harry's neat,
Tom's...not. Harry's so serious, Tom treats
everything like a joke. Harry is cautious, Tom jumps
in head first. They seemed to have nothing in
common.
But somehow, they complement each other,
rather than clash. Over the years, they've proved me
wrong...and I'm glad.
ONE WEEK BEFORE THE WEDDING: THE
HOLODECK
Tom tapped some commands into the console,
and the holodeck grid vanished, replaced by a lovely
cottage on the beach. Floor to ceiling windows
looked out on a deck built out over the water.
"We compromised on the honeymoon," Harry
said. "It's Myrtle Beach, late 20th century. My
favorite place, and Tom's favorite time."
"Myrtle Beach was known for its golf courses
back then," Tom explained. "I've got two dozen
different ones programmed. Also parasailing,
jetskiing, and several bike trails. And dozens of
nightclubs, all authentic."
"It's going to be great," Harry said, smiling.
"Yeah. Even if we never leave the house."
Seven:
I asked Ensign Kim what he wished for a
wedding gift. I expected him to request an item
which could be replicated. Instead, he asked me to
sing a song at his wedding.
It seemed an unusual request. I know Ensign
Kim likes music, but the computer database contains
millions of recordings from hundreds of Alpha
Quadrant cultures. Surely he could find a more
accomplished performer than myself among those.
According to the Doctor, however, a live
performance is more valued than a recording, and one
by a...friend even more so.
Therefore, the Doctor and I will be singing at
the Kim-Paris wedding.
ONE DAY BEFORE THE WEDDING: CARGO
BAY ONE
Neelix:
Tom wanted to have the wedding on the
holodeck, but I told him there just wouldn't be
enough room. The mess hall wasn't big enough,
either. Everyone wanted to see Voyager's favorite
couple get married. As morale officer, I insisted
everyone be invited. So it had to be Cargo Bay One.
Of course, not everyone can be there for the actual
ceremony, but Commander Chakotay graciously
worked the shifts so everyone will be able to attend
the reception.
Doesn't everything look nice? The flowers are
from Kes' garden. I know she would approve. She
always thought Tom and Harry were meant for each
other.
There's still a lot of work to do. I'm preparing a
fabulous banquet, featuring the foods of both Earth
and the Delta Quadrant. And Mr. Vulcan is making
the dessert.
"Wedding cake" is of dubious nutritional value.
It is, however, traditional. Cooking is a simple
matter of chemistry; I am confident of my ability to
complete this task. Admittedly, it is an inefficient
use of my time. Replicating a cake would be more
logical.
But I have observed that humans invest a great
deal of meaning into inefficiency, particularly for
ceremonial and social occasions. Making desserts
from scratch may be illogical, but making
concessions for others' values and customs is not.
THE MORNING OF THE WEDDING: TOM'S
QUARTERS
"We decided to get married in our Starfleet
dress uniforms. Starfleet has come to mean a lot to
both of us, and it just seemed right....Harry, hold still,
your collar's crooked."
Harry stopped long enough for Tom to adjust
the neckline on his dress uniform, then resumed
pacing and wringing his hands.
"Getting cold feet, Harry?"
"No!" Harry sighed, and came over to Tom.
"At least, not about marrying you. It's the ceremony
I'm nervous about. I'm afraid I'm going to screw it
up. I always screw up things like this."
"Relax, Har. I made it really short and sweet,
remember? No long vows or speeches. All you have
to do is stand there and say 'yes' at the right place."
"I'll probably still mess it up."
"Harry, don't worry. You can't screw it up.
And even if you do, so what? These are our friends.
They'll understand." He put an arm around Harry,
hugging him.
Harry smiled slightly, a little more relaxed.
"Sorry. You're marrying a doofus, Tom."
"I know. But I wouldn't have it any other way."
THE WEDDING
The crew were assembled in the cargo bay one,
standing in neat rows. They were all in uniform, as
suggested in the invitations. The wedding couple
didn't want anyone wasting relicator rations on
clothes they might never use again. Everyone who
was off-shift was there, and the ceremony would be
broadcast over the comm system, so those on duty
could watch or listen if they wanted to.
Music began, played on the Vulcan harp by
Tuvok, and Tom and Harry came in together, side by
side. The guests turned to see the happy couple.
Tom's red dress uniform sported his "fruit salad" - the impressive assortment of medals he'd earned in
his first stint in Starfleet. Harry's gold uniform was
embellished with a wide sash and a replica of a sword
that had been in his family for years.
The Doctor took holos as they walked the
length of the cargo bay, along the red carpet to where
the Captain awaited them, a narrow table before her.
As they stopped, facing Janeway across the table,
Tuvok put his harp down and came to Harry's side.
B'Elanna took her place at Tom's.
Seven and the Doctor performed their song
then. It was a variation of a traditional 20th century
wedding song, another concession to Tom's
sensibilities.
"Well a boy must leave his mother
They sang with their usual inhumanly perfect
harmony. Tom and Harry smiled at the singers, then
at each other. They both loved classical music.
"What's to be the reason
As the song ended, the Captain spoke. "This
has been the happiest duty of any ship's captain, since
the days of masted sailing ships. We are gathered
here today to witness the union of our crewmates and
friends, Tom and Harry."
There were two lacquered cups on the table;
Janeway pushed them forward. Tom and Harry each
picked one up, took a sip, then exchanged cups.
They drank again, then poured the wine in the two
cups back and forth, mixing their contents, and drank
a third time.
"Ensign Kim, Ensign Paris. Do you agree to
travel the path of life together from this day forth?"
"Yes," Tom and Harry said in unison.
"The rings," Janeway said.
B'Elanna handed Tom a plain gold band;
Tuvok did the same for Harry. There was a slightly
awkward moment when Harry forgot Tom was
supposed to go first, but they recovered quickly.
The Captain smiled. "With the power vested in
me by Starfleet Command, and the United Federation
of Planets, I pronounce that your wedding vows are
sealed. You may now kiss each other...."
THE RECEPTION
"Neelix outdid himself, didn't he?" Jenny
Delaney remarked to Lt. Chapman.
"Especially the pâté. I'd never guess it was
made with leola root."
"And the cake is simply stunning."
"I heard it was Tuvok who did that, not
Neelix."
"You're kidding!"
The buzz of conversation was interrupted by
the ringing of a spoon against a glass. "Shhh, it's
time for the toast," various voices hissed.
B'Elanna stood, resplendent in her dress
uniform. "Could I have your attention, please?
Everybody grab a drink." She looked a little nervous,
but her voice was strong and clear.
"The first time I saw Harry was in the medical
ward of the Ocampa. He was a soft human, so young
and confused and scared, barefoot in a drafty hospital
gown. Looking at him now, it's hard to believe he's
the same person." She paused. "He's much better
dressed." There were shouts of laughter.
She continued. "When I first met Tom, he was
just a boy, obsessed with silly holoprograms. Now
he's a man...obsessed with silly holoprograms."
More laughter. "It was obvious from the beginning
that Tom and Harry were meant for each other. It
took them a little longer to realize it. But it's been a
joy to watch them make that realization. And it will
be a joy to watch them share their lives together."
She raised her glass. "Please join me in wishing
them well."
EPILOGUE:
"But, Tom...."
"Harry, you didn't even want a wedding. I
don't understand why you're so anxious to get it all
recorded now. We've got plenty of great holos to
show your folks when we get back to the Alpha
Quadrant."
"I know, but...well, I can't help thinking that
one day you and I and all our friends will be dead."
"How cheerful."
"It's true," Harry insisted. "And I want our love
story, all of it, to be remembered, even after we're all
gone."
"Oh, Harry...." Tom blinked back tears.
"That's so sweet." He hugged his new husband,
gently kissed him. "But I'm sorry. There's still no
way I'm letting Neelix record our wedding night."
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Author's Note: Dedicated to Karen, who swore she'd
kill me if I ever did a wedding scene where someone
sings "There Is Love." So of course I had to do it,
just to annoy her. :-)
And no, I am absolutely, positively not doing A Baby Story!