An alternate ending for Clove and Cato Part II

Chapter 1

Eight months. Eight months, I have been pregnant. In one month, not only will I be giving birth to twins, but also the Hunger Games will begin again. They are starting early this year. The Capitol citizens are eager for the Games' arrival. The Capitol officials don't want to keep them waiting too long. However, this will be no ordinary Hunger Games. Every 25 years, there is a Quarter Quell. A Quarter Quell is when the game makers add a new element to teach the districts a lesson about their rebellion. In the first Quarter Quell, the districts voted for their tributes, instead of reaping someone at random. In the second Quarter Quell, two male and two female tributes were chosen. This doubled the number of tributes in the arena. Katniss Everdeen and Peeta Mellark, my fellow tributes who were co victors with me and my husband Cato, were mentored by the victor of the second Quarter Quell. His name is Haymitch Abernathy. Who knows what the third Quarter Quell will be. I'm just glad I'll never have to compete in the games again. I just hope my kids don't have to. However, I don't need to worry about that right now. Tomorrow, we are meeting up with our escort, Pinda, our mentor, Enorbia, and I will meet with my stylist, Monte. They will prepare us for the victory tour we are required to go on to represent the Capitol's forgiveness of the rebellion. I'm not really all that happy about it, but I'm looking forward to seeing Katniss and Peeta again. I haven't seen them since we left the Capitol. I bet their jaws will be on the floor when they see how much my belly has grown. Cato is also upset that we have to go on this tour. He just wants to disappear from the prying eyes of Panem. They all want to know what we are up to now. I'm kind of nervous about being on live TV again, especially with my ever growing abdomen. I am worried about them judging me, but I am way more concerned about being able to live up to the Capitol's expectations. If I don't they could kill me, Cato, our parents, or even our kids. That really worries me. I can't lose any of the people I love. I need them.

Chapter 2

In order to keep my mind off the upcoming tour, I will try to focus on the fact that Cato and I are hidden from the public. We have been hidden for several months. During these past few months since coming back, Cato and I have prepared a nursery for our unborn children. Its been a lot of work, but it has been worth it. The nursery looks incredible. It has tons of adorable animals and trees on the walls to give a wild and free kind of look. Also during this time, every night before we went to bed, Cato would read a children's book to them. After he finished reading, he would kiss them good night. He would then bring his face up towards mine to give me a good night kiss. It was so sweet. He still does it too. Its amazing to see this new side of him. He is no longer a ruthless killer with a thirst for blood. He has now become a father figure. He's ready to be a father. I'm ready to be a mother. Its weird to think I will be a mom, especially at such a young age. Both of us are only 17. Although, age is just a number. Anyway, tonight is our last night of privacy before the tour. We go through our nightly routine, and after we get through this, I fall asleep nestled into one of his arms. He places his other arm on our unborn children, as if this is his only way to protect them. After all, both our kids and I are the only things that he really cares about. Without us he would surely die.

Chapter 3

We are awaken by a loud knocking on our door. We don't get up right away. We want to savor our last moments of privacy. That doesn't last long though. Cato pulls on a robe and goes to open the door while I mentally prepare myself for what is to come. I sit there for a few minutes, waiting for something, although I don't know what. Eventually, Cato slips into the room to tell me that Pinda, Enorbia, and our styling teams are here. After I get dressed, I go to greet them. They are extremely excited to see me. They missed me. When they see how much my pregnancy has progressed, their jaws drop. They are speechless. They take a deep breath, and begin to tell us what the plan is. We will start in District 12, and work our way backward toward the Capitol. We all have to deliver a speech in each of the districts. The speeches must praise the Capitol. Basically, we are their puppets. They are using us to deliver a message that looks like it was meant to sound like they are forgiving of the rebellion. However, in reality, we are being manipulated into intimidating them. We are to show the districts that the Capitol is in charge. Anyone who defies them, will meet their doom. I just hope that neither me nor my loved ones receive any damage from the Capitol, due to a mistake that we might make. My loved ones' fates rest on the shoulders of Cato and I. This is a matter of life and death.

Chapter 4

I start to think about what I should do to ensure that my loved ones stay alive. Then it hits me. I know how to keep the Capitol from killing them. I should not meet their expectations, but I should exceed them. In this way, I can be sure that both me and the people nearest to my heart remain on this earth. If I don't succeed at this, they will die. The idea that I could cause the death of someone close to me, haunts my mind as Monte prepares me for my departure. He doesn't dress me in something too fancy. Its just a nice blue top with a simple black skirt. He is trying to make me look friendly. Believe me, I need all the help I can get for this situation. I have no problem with a fight, but I'm not so good at interacting with people. Usually, when I first meet people, I just talk about my life, Cato, or different fighting techniques. I don't have a wide array of discussion topics. However, when I'm with Cato, everything is different. There is always something to talk about when he's around. He brings me out of my shell. Apparently, Katniss and Peeta have a similar affect, although its not quite the same. I know Katniss has the same issues as me. Because of this, we can relate to each other, which makes it easy to understand how each of us is feeling. Peeta just has a way with words. He can get me to pull my walls down, just by the way he talks to me. Cato, on the other hand, is the person I love most in this world. I also trust him more than anyone that I know. Because of the fact we trust each other, we can talk about anything. I don't have to worry about saying the wrong thing when I'm with him, Katniss, or Peeta. With other people, I can't seem to function normally. Luckily, Monte is making up for this by making me look good to distract people from the fact that I'm socially awkward. Eventually, he snaps me out of my own head, and back into reality. I get my brain to relax some, so I can shift gears. I want to distract myself from all this. I eventually am able to distract myself by keeping my eyes locked on Cato. He is being dressed in the same suit that he used last year on our one year anniversary date. I can't help but smile while thinking back to that moment. After 3 hours, we are whisked away to the train station. Once we get there, there are cameras in our faces. Our lives are no longer private. Everything that is going to happen, has finally revealed itself as a reality.

Chapter 5

Once on the train, Pinda sits us done to review the schedule once more. I can't really focus on it though. My brain is numb from all the thinking I did just this morning. I squeeze Cato's hand so I can keep myself from drifting off into my own head. When I hold his hand, I tend to think more logically. Pinda talks and talks for what seems like ages. After what feels like a hundred years, she dismisses us. Just before we set foot into our room, she stops us to say one more thing. We will arrive in District 12 in two hours. Therefore, we don't have time to relax. We need to prepare for our feel like they need to have a different look for everything we do so that we look fresh. They take the entire two hours to redo our hair and pick out our clothes. Its ridiculous how much time they take just for one simple task. I don't want to say anything, because I could say one wrong thing that could end in disaster. I just bite my tongue to remind myself to keep quite. They have already prepared a speech for us. We will have to write our own speeches after this. When we arrive, Katniss and Peeta, along with their team, are there to greet us. I was right. Their jaws are on the floor. They knew it had been a while since they last saw us, but they had no idea how far along I really was. They are thrilled to see us. They give us the biggest hugs. We try to chat for a little bit, but we are forced into separate rooms in District 12's justice building. Its not all that impressive inside, although my mind is going in so many different directions, I don't really take it all in. They are preparing the stage right now. Out the window, I can see people gathering. In a few minutes, Panem will get its first real view of me. The Capitol will be watching. I have to deliver this speech with great care. One misstep could mean the death of my loved ones. I take a deep breath to calm myself down, and they usher us on to the stage. Once on the stage, all eyes are on me.

Chapter 6

As I walk on the stage, for what feels like an eternity, I start to lose a grip on reality. All of my senses, except for my sight, are gone. I can't even hear the Mayor of District 12 announce our presence. We are seated right behind him. I stare out into the crowd waiting to be called up for my speech. While I wait, I observe the inhabitants of District 12. I never realized how poor they are. Most people are thin and pale. The majority of the men have coal stains on their clothes. Their eyes show despair. Also, the buildings here are very dilapidated. I now know how lucky we are to live the way we do. Where I come from, everyone is well fed and clean. Not to mention the architecture of my district is much more sophisticated. This place is what helped Katniss become the person she is. Everyday she would have to fight to keep her family alive. That is what made her successful in surviving the games. Survival, to Katniss, is second nature. Now she doesn't have to fight anymore. She has money to feed her family and house to shelter them in. I am glad that we kept her alive. She is so inspirational. She is living proof that compassion really does exist. Cato and I are too, but her case is a lot more prominent. Also, her family needs her. She is their only life line. If we had killed her, they would have died, too. Cato grabs my hand to bring me back to reality. He knows when I am lost in thought. I am thankful that he was able to get me to focus again. The mayor wraps up his speech and introduces me. I stand up, and make my way to the podium to deliver my speech. The way I deliver this speech, will determine weather or not my loved ones will live or die. I take a deep breath to gather myself. I then begin to delicately deliver my speech.

Chapter 7

Each word that passes through my lips is proclaimed with great care. I make sure that each word is clearly said. One slip up could be disastrous. I can feel sweat on my face, but no one can see it. I try to forget that thousands of eyeballs are directed towards me. I just imagine that I'm giving this speech to Cato. That makes it feel more natural because I can say anything to him. I can feel his eyes locked on me. His presence calms me down a little bit. At this moment in time, I am completely blind. The only thing I can see is Cato. At least, I can only see him in my mind. I continue with my long speech while imagining that only Cato is there. As I look into his eyes, I begin to become more confident in how I am delivering this speech. Eventually, I read the last word on the small note card on the podium in front of me. Once it leaves me tongue, I sigh silently with relief. Thank goodness that's over. As I gain my senses back, I begin to be able to hear the forced cheers of the audience. I know that they are only clapping out of fear. Still, they have empathy for me. They know it's scary to be doing this. However, they are more concerned with trying to make it to the next day. I don't blame them. I'm trying to do the same, but I'm in a much more dangerous situation. The mayor dismisses me and I immediately head back to my seat. I get to my seat not a moment too soon. I feel like I'm going to faint. Cato wraps his arm around me to help me regain my sanity. As I come to, I find Katniss standing at the podium delivering her speech. It seems as though she is not struggling near as much as I was. It doesn't take her long to get through it. Peeta delivers his speech extremely well. His words seem to be knit together perfectly. Its like he has had years of experience at this. He can convince anyone about anything. He doesn't seem flustered at all. He is calm and collected the whole time he is up there. Before I know it, he is done and Cato has left my side to deliver his speech. He is able to present himself in the same manner that Peeta did. He is calm, and is able to weave his words with expertise. He probably feels just as much pressure as I do to keep our families alive. He is just good at hiding his worries from the public. He knows that if he allows himself to slip, even a little, he could lose everything. I have the same situation. I just hope that I didn't mess up. Eventually, I find Cato is back by my side. The mayor concludes the ceremony, and we ushered back into the Justice Building. They have a small party set up for us to celebrate our victory. I am not mentally able to be there. My body is working like a robot. I just go through the motions that are expected of me here. However, I can't think straight because I have so much on my plate. My head is spinning. I never really take in what is happening here. When my head finally stops spinning, I find Cato and I back on the train to District 11. Once we get settled in, we immediately go to bed. We are exhausted. We traveled from our district to District 12 in one day, delivered difficult speeches, and went to a party that ran very late. It may not seem like a lot, but I had so much pressure on me, that everything that happened today took a major toll on me. I have been thinking long and hard all day. My mind needs to rest. I kiss Cato good night, and I am dead asleep as soon as my head hits the pillow.

Chapter 8

Our eyes are open at about 9:00 A.M. We will be in District 11 at noon. We need time to prepare our own speeches. We also need time to get prepared for our arrival. We quickly gobble up our breakfast, and get straight to work. They give us a list of guidelines that we need to follow. I make sure that I follow everything. I am a little shaky as a write down each word. I am a nervous wreck right now. Once we are finished, Pinda checks them to ensure that they are written to the Capitol's standards. She simply nods her head to signify her approval. That's a relief. By the time this all done, our styling teams are already applying make up to our faces. While they are doing so, my mind begins to drift away again. I start to realize that I have changed since the games. The games have changed the person I am. My line of thinking isn't really the same. I tend to get trapped in my own head because I am constantly analyzing each situation, just like I did in the games. I had to be a lot more cautious than normal in order to survive. I am a lot more careful with each decision I make, because I continually fear the worst possible outcomes. I feel like the games has scared me for life. The things I saw and the things I did molded me into a new person. I don't recognize this person. She seems extremely lost and scared with a slight hint of guilt. This guilt arises from the lives she has stolen. I don't like what I have become. I still love Cato and our future children. I still enjoy talking with Katniss and Peeta. That will never change. I'm just... different. I want to be the old me. I want to be that fun-loving, happy, and intelligent person I used to be. I want to be that innocent child I once was. I'm all grown up now. I have lives that are depending on me. I need to stay strong for them. I also need to get back to the old me. In this way, I will be able to escape my head and be free. I need to be the person I once was, not only for my own sake, but for Cato and our children. He doesn't seem any different, other than the fact he has become a gentle father-figure. I wonder how he was able to be unaffected by the games. I need to figure that out for myself. Otherwise, who knows what kind of things I might get myself into if I don't revert back to my old self.

Chapter 9

I find myself back in the real world once we arrive in District 11. We go through the same routine as last time, except in a different order. Peeta and Katniss are up first this time. They don't seem to do anything different. I find my eyes locked on the families of Rue and Thresh. Rue had several younger siblings. They have tears flowing down their tiny, innocent faces. I can barely look at Thresh's parents. I know they hate me for killing their son. I don't blame them. I would be furious at the person who killed my child, too. I feel horrible about it. Thresh didn't deserve to die, but he had to. If I could have saved him, and Rue, I would have done so in a heart beat. I wish there was a way that I could ease the pain they have from their great loss. I try to focus on Cato delivering his speech. After he finishes his speech, I go up. I give my speech the same way as before, except with a little more confidence. All of a sudden, an idea hits me. I think I know how I can at least do something to help the families of Rue and Thresh. I decide to give a portion of my winnings to the families of Rue and Thresh. That won't ease their pain, but at least it will help them be able to feed themselves. I'm sure Thresh was his family's supplier of food. They are probably starving without him. Rue probably was able to gather food for her family. This amount of money should be able to compensate for their lack of food, but that won't bring Rue and Thresh back. That is what they really want, but they know that won't happen. I'm sure that appreciate the fact that I do care. I even sincerely apologize to them. I really mean it. I'm sure Rue and Thresh would be grateful that I was able to help take care of their families since they couldn't come back. I wish they could. After I finish my apology, the whole district begins to clap. They have never seen such generosity. Even though I wasn't doing anything for all of them, they recognize that humanity does still exist. I have proven that. Once the commotion dies down, the Mayor of District 11 concludes the event the same way the Mayor of District 12 did. We attend another party and I feel the same way I did at the last one. Once we are on board the train again, Pinda calls Cato and I to the dinner table. I am in big trouble.

Chapter 10

Apparently, the Capitol doesn't like the fact that I gave some of my winnings away. They felt that this action worked against what they have been trying to establish. They were trying to establish that they are in control and that no one will be compensated for anything. Everyone has to earn their keep, unless they have proven themselves worthy by winning the games. What I did made it look like compensation is possible. They think that other people might try to gain compensation for other things. The more people that do this, the more likely things are going to get out of control. The Capitol must always have control, or things can get deadly. I am worried what might happen now. Are they going to kill the families of Rue and Thresh so they don't have to compensate them? Are they going to punish them? Its not their fault that they are feeling a hole in their hearts. They are missing a piece of their family. They shouldn't be punished for that. They just might be because of what I did. I could have caused them to meet their doom! What have I done? I might have just robbed more innocent people of their lives! I squeeze Cato's hand as I wait for Pinda to tell me what the Capitol plans to do about this. He seems nervous, too. I don't know why. Its not like he's in danger. Or is he? Are the going to punish me for going against them? Are they going to kill Cato, or our families? I now know why he is so nervous. He's worried that they might kill me for this. He doesn't want to lose me. I don't want to die either. I also don't want him or our families to die either. I brace myself for what is about to happen. When the news passes through Pinda's lips, I burry my face into my hands and cry.

Chapter 11

I can't believe they would do such a thing just because of one stupid mistake. Now I feel a hole in my heart. Our parents are gone. I let them die. I killed them. I tried to do the right thing, and that caused me to lose our family. They will never get to see their grandchildren. I feel horrible about this. Not only did I get my own parents killed, but I caused Cato's parents to die as well. He didn't deserve to lose them just because of what I did. Now neither of us have their support. We are pretty much on our own now. Katniss and Peeta are the only people we can trust now. How could I be so stupid to let this happen? I should have known better. I just wanted to show my sympathy for the loss the families of Rue and Thresh feel. Instead, I caused my own loss, as well as Cato's. This is pretty much the same as me stabbing them to death. Either way, I caused them to die. Cato pulls me into his arms to comfort me. I bury my face into his chest and slam fist on the table out of sheer rage. I'm sobbing hysterically, too. I know he's upset about losing his parents, but he's not showing it. How is he able to keep himself together after hearing that his parents died? I wonder if he's mad at me about it. He has every right to be. Eventually, Pinda dismisses to our room. I begin to apologize to him about letting this happen. I ramble about it for a few moments when he places his hands on my shoulders, and goes to kiss me. That gets me to shut up. He looks me in the eyes and softly says, "Clove, don't feel so bad about this. Sure, I'm upset that our parents are dead. However, I'm not mad at you about it. It really isn't your fault. What you did was right. The Capitol just panicked and did something harsh just because they don't agree with you. I still love you no matter what happens. I want our parents to be alive, but I need you. As long as you and our kids are alive, I'm ok. I need you like a heart needs to beat." I begin to tear up again after hearing this. It makes me feel so special. I cry back, "Oh, Cato!" and I wrap my arms around him and squeeze him tight. No words can describe how grateful I am to be so loved. He loves me more than his own family. I am so lucky to have him. Sure I miss my family, but Cato means everything to me. I too, "Need him like a heart needs to beat."

Chapter 12

For the next eight days, we continue across Panem as the Capitol's messengers. They go back to preparing our speeches so that we don't make the another deadly mistake. Each and every time I am careful with each individual word that I say. Every day, we attend a party after each ceremony. I live every day in fear of what could happen next. I am in survival mode again. The last time I was in survival mode was when I was in the games. Every second, of every minute, of every day, Cato is right by my side to keep my spirits high. He guides me through every obstacle that comes my way. Since I am due to give birth in a matter of weeks, he is always there to be sure that both I and our children are okay. He knows how much stress I am having right now. He's stressed, too, but he doesn't show it. I know I'm causing some of his stress. My hormones have been out of whack because of my pregnancy. This has caused me to be very moody. I'm constantly crying, screaming in rage, and I have been just plain annoying. Pinda and Enorbia are running out of patience. I don't know how Cato is always able to stand my constant mood swings. Every night before we go to bed, he places his hand on my stomach to see if he can feel our children kicking. Every night, he can feel them kicking or punching. This is his way of making sure that are still alive. There isn't a moment that goes by where I don't feel them stirring inside me. It is a strange feeling to be carrying human beings in my stomach. I like it though. It gives me a warm and fuzzy feeling. It is because of the fact that I am carrying a form of life inside of me, this warm fuzzy feeling, the fact that Cato is so happy to become a father, and because of how happy I make him, that I am able to continue to fight to make it through each and every single day. I cannot give up on us. He needs me and I need him. We both need our children. If any of us die, so will the others. After I think about all of this, do I realize why he is able to be so patient. Its because he loves me. He also loves our kids. He will do any thing to keep us alive. I keep all this in mind as I move through the districts. When we get ours, I can't help but cry. Knowing that there is no one left in our district that we love, tears us to pieces. I don't know how I'm going to get through this.

Chapter 13

Although we are able to go through the usual motions, we are both fighting back tears. There are four empty chairs that are supposed to be for our parents. However, I got them killed. I don't even want to be here right now. I want to move away from District 2. Just being hear is causing severe emotional pain. I can barely get through my speech. I really want to go back to the simple days. The days where Cato and I never existed in the eyes of Panem. The days, where are relationship was still blossoming. We were worry free. I miss not only my parents, but also his. The support they provided was phenomenal. They were such a big help. Now, we are on own. Not to mention they always had useful advice for us. We needed them. I am so mad at myself for letting this happen. I am fighting back tears the whole day. When we get back on the train, I sigh with relief. I never want to go back. Sure, I'll miss our home in the victor's village. Especially since we worked so hard on the nursery. However, being in the district is bringing me heartache. I need to get away from this. I want to move next door to Katniss and Peeta. We can get some support from them. We need their help to get past our grief. I'm going to ask them soon. I'm sure they would love to have us next door. In the past few months, we have become very close. Not to mention that Katniss's mother, and Prim, can help keep an eye on my pregnancy. They could even deliver our children. They have done it before. I don't want a stranger to be looking down there, even if it they are being professional. It would be just plain uncomfortable. I decide to discuss this with Cato. He likes the idea. He is feeling the same pain I am. He doesn't want to be in District two. He wants to get as far away from it as possible. Tomorrow, after the end party in District one, we are going to ask them if it is possible to live next door from them. As I lay my head down to sleep for the night, I try to think about the things I have to look forward to. The tour will be over soon, I might live next door to my best friends, and best of all, I am looking forward to raising my children with Cato. As my eyes begin to close, I can't help, but feel my unborn bundles of joy squirming inside of me. They want to get out, and soon. I just hope its not too soon.

Chapter 14

Going through our routine in District one is a breeze. Our speeches are delivered perfectly. The party goes as usual. Eventually, we approach Katniss and Peeta to ask them if we could be neighbors. They seem to like the idea. They have no problem with it. In fact, they are willing to help us move in. Peeta is a great artist. He wants to design our nursery. I am so excited about becoming their neighbors. Its going to be great. We will have our best friends right next us in case something happens. Plus, we always have fun talking with each other. Peeta is hilarious, and Katniss always has some useful advice. She is so kind. I'm happy that I finally have real friends. I can't help but smile through out the whole night. After some time, we are back on the train. We are being taken to the Capitol again. We are having one last celebration before we are allowed to head back home. Of course, we will just be gathering our belongings so we can move to District 12. However, I feel like something isn't right. I can feel that something drastic is going to happen in the near future. I feel like I might lose something important. I hope this is just my hormones messing with me again. I try to ignore this feeling as I fall asleep again.

Chapter 15

By the time we arrive in the Capitol, we are dressed to perfection. However, I don't even pay attention to what I'm wearing. I couldn't describe it if I wanted to. I'm too nervous to think about anything. This uneasy feeling inside me has grown stronger. I try to ignore it again as we are taken to President Snow's mansion. The party is exactly the same as the ones in the districts, except that there are more people. Enorbia introduces us to the new head game maker, Plutarch Heavansbee. He seems uneasy. He looks like he is out of place. Something is bothering him. The moment he opened his mouth to introduce himself, a picture of a mockingjay pin appeared in my head. That was weird. The only mocking jay pin I've ever seen was the one Katniss wore in the arena. A mocking jay is a symbol of rebellion. I wonder why my mind brought this image to me. What does it mean? I think about it the whole day. By late afternoon, we are back on the train. By evening time, we have already stopped in District two to pick up our things, and to drop off Enorbia, Pinda, and our stylist teams. On the way to District 12, we are forced to turn on the TV so we can find out what this years Quarter Quell will be. President Snow opens the envelope, and reads off what is on the card that was inside it. Once he is done reading it, I shut off the TV, run to our room, crawl under the covers, and cry.

Chapter 16

There has to be some mistake. It can't be real. I must be hallucinating out of fear. After about a minute, I realize that I'm not hallucinating. They are sending previous victors of the games back to the arena. They will have to fight for their lives again. There is a chance that Cato and I might have to go back in. I am in no condition to fight. I can if I have to, but I should't put my body through this ordeal again. It's too stressed out. I also don't want Cato to have to go back in. He can't. I need him. I can't lose him. I know I could not survive without him in my life. I begin to sob harder knowing that I might be deprived of my Boy with the Sword. Not two minutes later, I find myself wrapped up tightly in Cato's arms. He looks straight in to my eyes, and gently wipes the tears flowing down my face. He then tips my chin up to give me a reassuring kiss. As I kiss him, it feels like the whole world has stopped. There is nothing going on around us. It is as if we are the only people on earth. Once we let go, I feel instantly relaxed. I really needed that. He always knows how to cheer me up. I pull him in for another kiss, just because I enjoy having his lips on mine. After we release, he strokes my hair, looks me in the eye, and whispers,"Just close your eyes. You'll be all right. Nothing can hurt you now." He's right. I am not in danger at the moment. I just need to rest. As I drift away to sleep, I find myself imbedded into his warm body. Throughout the entire night, I feel as if his body is my shield from the cruel outside world. At the moment, I'm safe & sound right here, right now.

Chapter 17

I awaken to find myself still encased in his arms. He hasn't moved all night. In fact, he hasn't slept. He's just been lying here, waiting for me to wake up. He wanted to be sure I was going to make it though the night. He is in his protective state again. The moment I open my eyes, his lips are pressed against mine. This kiss puts me in a good mood to start the day. We will be arriving in District 12 today. I am so excited to finally live in peace. I just hope neither Cato nor I have to go back into the arena. I am also looking forward to moving next door to Katniss and Peeta. I start to think about how great it will be to be neighbors with them. Then all of a sudden, I feel a sharp pain. I may not have them here forever. Katniss is the only female victor from her district, which means she is the only female that can go back into the arena. I don't know how she would survive against previous victors, especially since they are now trained killers. Peeta also might go into the arena. However, Peeta and Katniss's mentor, Haymitch might get reaped. Peeta might still be ok, but I don't know what will happen with Katniss. She is my best friend. I don't want to watch her die. I also don't want to be reaped and have to contend with her or Peeta again. I shudder just thinking about having to fight them again. It would be too difficult to kill them, since I have grown so close to them. I know Cato has grown to enjoy their company as well. He wouldn't want to kill them either. Plus, we don't want to go in together because we might find ourselves in the same situation as we did in the last game we were in. We can't fight each other. Besides, I know Cato would rather stab himself in the heart then have to even give me the slightest cut. Not to mention, he will do anything to ensure the survival of both me and our children. This includes killing Katniss and Peeta if he has to. As I lie here thinking about this, while still wrapped in Cato arms, I begin to feel a fire growing in my heart. A fire that is fueled by anger. This anger is directed towards the Capitol. I am furious that they would make the previous victors battle to survive again. They have already done it once. They should't have to do it again. Many of them have been scared for life by the brutal and bloody things that happened within the walls of the arena. Those scars won't heal. This will only make them even more excruciatingly painful than they already are. I have my own unhealed wounds from my ordeal in the games. No matter what happens, it feels like the Capitol is rubbing salt in these wounds. They are trying to prove that there is no one strong enough to challenge them. Therefore, they are sending the strongest people they know to war, against themselves. Neither Cato nor I can afford to become their soldiers in the arena because we will have to fight Katniss for sure. If we don't go in, she could win. I just have to hope we don't get reaped. If we do, who knows what will happen.

Chapter 18

My head is spinning. I can't stop worrying about what could happen. Cato can see that I am distressed. In order to distract me from my negative thoughts, he picks me up and takes me to the kitchen to eat breakfast. Its hard to eat because my mind is being pulled in so many different directions. Eventually, I finish my breakfast and he guides me back to the room so we can change for our arrival in District 12. He attempts to tell a few corny jokes, just to cheer me up. They do make me giggle. He then comes to me for another kiss. After we release, I can't help but smile. How can I be so upset when I have him by my side? As long as I have him, I have nothing to worry about. Not only does he have my back, but also he is always able to give me something to be happy about. There is no need to be so upset right now. We have two beautiful children on the way, we are moving to a better place, we will have awesome neighbors, and we will never have to fight in the games again. At least, I hope. As the day goes on, I try to keep these positive thoughts in my head so I don't stress myself out with all of my worries. We eventually do arrive in District 12. Katniss and Peeta help us move our few belongings into our new home right next to theirs. We are settled in within hours. Over the course of about a week, we are moved in, and Katniss and Peeta have prepared a new nursery for us. We haven't seen it yet. They want to keep it a surprise. At the end of the week, they blind fold us and guide us to the new room. As soon as they remove my blind fold, I stand there in awe of how amazing it is. Peeta has painted some adorable animals all over the walls. They are living the most serene forest with a rainbow in the middle to represent peace and prosperity. Katniss has built two beautiful cribs, two diaper changing stations, and a couple of chairs. She even painted them to match the room. Cato, too, is amazed at how elegant the room is. We love it. The whole room is incredible. I nearly squeeze the life out of them repeating "thank you" constantly to both of them. I have tears of joy flowing down my face. I don't know how I could ever repay them. Now that this gorgeous nursery is built, not only am I ready to bring two new lives into the world, but also the world is now ready for them.

Chapter 19

The next day we are on a train back to District 2 for the reaping. I can't help but think that, even though I am overjoyed about our new nursery, about how I am dreading tomorrow. The positive thoughts I have had in my head all week are now being over shadowed by what is to come. Tomorrow is the reaping for the 75th Hunger Games. I also recently found out that no one can volunteer in place of someone else because the person that is reaped has already proved that they are capable of surviving the games. In the Capitol's mind they should be able to do it again. That's scary for me because I wouldn't survive again. They know that too, but they don't care. I can't afford to be reaped. I also can't afford for Cato to be reaped either. I need him. He could make it through again, but I don't want to risk it. As the night wears on, I become anxious about losing him. He is aware of this. He again attempts to lower my anxiety by trying to tell me a few corny jokes again. It doesn't work this time, although I don't know why. Even kissing him doesn't help. The only thing we can do is hold on to each other as if it is a life or death matter. However, it is. We could lose each other. He, too is even scared about this. He never gets scared. I don't even think he ever gets nightmares. I asked him once if he does. He replied, "The only nightmares I have, are about losing you, and our children." These nightmares might become a reality. He won't show that he is afraid of losing us. He wants to stay strong for us. He wants to be able to protect us. He's afraid that he will look weak if he shows that he is afraid. Since we both are scared of what the future holds, we won't be getting any sleep tonight.

Chapter 20

We awaken 30 minutes before our arrival in District 2. We use the entire 30 minutes to prepare. While we are preparing, I wander through the confusing forest in my head. This forest is dark, gloomy, and most of all, terrifying. The forest itself represents the fact that I am lost and that I have nowhere to go. All I know is that I am in a very frightening place right now. I am in a position where I might lose everything that I love. The darkness of the forest represents that I have entered a place full of fear. This fear is derived from the horrific thoughts of what is to come. The gloomy look of this forest represents what I am feeling. I feel like I might lose a part of me. This part of me is what keeps me from being depressed. This depressed me is evil. This evil turns me into a malicious creature. This creature is ruthless because there is no joy to fill the black hole that would be her heart. Without that joy, she has no feelings. She then becomes a stone cold killer. She and I, are not the same person. However, I might transform into this terrifying creature if I lose everything that I hold close at heart. I will become my own worst enemy. I can't let that happen. My kids don't deserve to see me that way. They deserve the best that I can give them. I must fight off my inner evil for their sake. I continue to roam through the dark forest for what seems like an eternity. All of a sudden, I find my hand grasping Cato's. He kisses me on the cheek which allows me to find the light at the end of the tunnel that will lead me out of the darkness in my head. We have arrived. I take a deep breath to prepare myself for appearing in the eyes of Panem again. We stride down the stairs, hand in hand, to a small car that takes us to the stage. We are seated together in an arrangement of chairs set up for each of the former victors. Before I know it, they are playing that stupid documentary about how the games began. As the film goes on, I realize that many of the former victors are eager to get back into the arena. I can read it on their faces. They want to relive the glory of being a victor again. After the film is finished, normally we would expect Pinda to go on and reap the girls. However, this time somethings different. She instead says, "In order to remind the districts that the Capitol is in full control of everyone, there will be no volunteers this year. Also, the Capitol believes that since everyone that is eligible for the games has already won it, they should have the ability to win it again. Therefore, who ever is reaped must go in, regardless if someone wants to volunteer." There goes the chance of us being spared of having to go in again. I knew this too. Pinda had told me this earlier. I just forgot because I have so much going on. Anyway, she eventually goes to reap the girls. I hold my breath as she takes the small slip of paper to the podium. I squeeze Cato's hand tightly as she opens it. In a matter of moments, my fate will be decided. For now, I can only hope.

Chapter 21

I don't hear even hear the name. All I know is that it is not mine. Thank goodness I'm not going back in. I have been spared. I look behind me to see that Enorbia is getting up. She must have been reaped. This isn't good for Katniss. Enorbia is extremely deadly. She is quick, and incredibly strong. The only way that Katniss could beat her, is by outsmarting her. I think she could do it though. Anyway, I can see that Enorbia is smiling. She's ready to head back in and dominate. She shakes Pinda's hand, and steps off to the side. Now it's the boy's turn. My heart is racing. I clench Cato's hand with all my might as she heads over to the bowl filled with names. My other hand eventually wanders over to his arm. That hand then begins to tightly squeeze his firm bicep. I have forgotten how strong he is. His arm is harder than a diamond. However, not even his strength can protect us from what might be on that slip of paper. When she reaches in to take out an unfortunate name, she doesn't even hesitate. She just grabs a single slip of paper off the top. I can tell she's eager to just get this over with. I hope that his name is not on that slip. Cato's name can't be on that slip. There are so many names in there, that it is unlikely for that piece to belong to him. Still, there is a slight chance. Anyway, it feels like it takes her an eternity to reach the podium. When she finally begins to unfold the paper, I feel my heart stop. It then drops to the floor and shatters into billions of tiny little pieces. It has been broken by the sound of my lovers name. He kisses me tenderly, and takes his place right next to Enorbia. I may have just lost the man I love forever.

Chapter 22

Everything in my body goes numb. I then find myself trying to resist a scream. There must be some mistake. It can't be his name that was on that tiny piece of paper. Maybe it's all a dream. I try to pinch myself so I can wake up. It doesn't work. This is really happening. Now that I know that this is reality, I must now fight off the urge to go and kill Pinda for reaping his name. Then again, she's only doing her job. This is the Capitol's doing. They allowed this to happen. I once again feel a fire ignite in my heart and soul. My sheer rage acts as coal, feeding the inferno that is blazing through me. Then, all of a sudden, I run out of coal. The fire is put out by the tears flowing down my face. I can no longer shield my emotions from the world. It doesn't matter if they see my despair. The only thing that matters to me, could be lost forever. I cannot bear losing him. I begin to sob hysterically, knowing that I might lose him. As I attempt to try to salvage what little emotional strength I have left, Pinda takes them into the justice building. Eventually, I am allowed to see him one last time. The moment I burst though the door, I dash straight into his arms. The tears are once again streaming down my face. He then lets me go to wipe away the tears. I look into his glassy eyes and hysterically cry, "Its not fair! You can't go back in! You shouldn't have to fight for your life again. Plus, I need you. Our children need you! We need you! Please stay! Don't leave me. You know I won't make it without you!" For the first time he has tears streaming from his eyes. He then says,"Clove, there is nothing we can do! I have to go! If I could stay I would! I don't want to leave you, but I must!" I start to enter a state of denial. I ramble on, "No, no, no! You can't go! I cannot imagine life without you! I'm dead without you! The only reason I live, is to love you! Please don't ..." He places one finger on my mouth to silence me, places his other hand on my pregnant belly, and then utters, "I know. I feel the same way. However, if I have to die, so be it. I will do it in order to make sure you and our children survive. Whatever happens, I know you can make it through. You are strong. You are a fighter. Plus, either Haymitch or Peeta won't get reaped and whoever lives will comfort you in my absence. There will always be someone there for you. You won't be alone." I then sob,"But that someone won't be you! A guy like you is impossible to find!" He sigh's,"Clove, I love you so much, and it breaks my heart that I have to leave you like this. If I don't make it back, just remember these promises. I promise that I will always love you until my last breath, and beyond. Our love will never die. I promise I will always be living in the stars watching down upon you and our family. I will always be with you. Always." I begin sob even harder after hearing this. I feel like I'm losing apart of me. There has to be a way to prevent this. I only know one way. I squeeze him tight and whisper,"Promise me one last thing?" He replies, "Anything." For the last time, I stare into his soft blue eyes and say," Win for me, Cato." as I am dragged out of the room by the peace keepers. I probably will never see him again.

Chapter 23

The peace keepers lead me to the train platform to wait for his departure. As I wait, I burst into tears. I have no one next to me right now to comfort me. I'm on my own. I'm all alone in this world. As he is boarding the train, I can feel that something is missing. Instead of feeling a hole in my heart, I feel as though my whole heart is gone. Cato has stolen it. It will always be with him. Therefore, I'm pretty much dead. It makes my soul ache not having him here. I feel like I'm being ripped apart. As the tears flood my eyes, I watch as the train doors close behind him. He presses his face up against the window. I can see that his face is flushed red with pain. He yearns to be next to me again. As the train begins to move, he blows me a good bye kiss. I catch it and send one back. He catches it and begins to wave goodbye. As I wave back, I feel everything that I am become destroyed. I am broken. I begin to reenter that dark, gloomy forest that is in my head. His glassy eyes are the last thing I see. Before I know it, he's gone.

Chapter 24

I just stand there, on the platform, for what feels like ages. I don't know where to go or what to do. Once the train is gone, I begin to feel my legs take me somewhere, although I don't know exactly where. As I wander through town I begin to think about what I should do next. Maybe I should go back to 12 and try to console either Peeta or Haymitch, which ever one wasn't reaped. They might be able to help. That is the only place I have left to go. Once I decide that this is my best option, I attempt to figure out where my legs are taking me. The moment I get there, it hits me. How could I allow myself to come here? It hurts being here. This place is filled with many fond memories, although I am associating it more with pain. However, I am able to allow myself a small smile. There are many wonderful things that happened here. I remember playing in the back yard here. I remember doing my homework on the porch. I remember practicing knife throwing at a tree in the front yard as I was training for the games. I can see the marks on the tree are still there. I wander inside as if I'm looking for something. The kitchen and living room reminds me of that one fateful moment that happened eight long months ago. We were carefree at that time. We were enjoying each others company before all of this ever happened. Now that my parents are gone, this place is just as empty as my heart. After a few moments, I eventually wander into the last place I probably should be. Here it is. This is the place that changed our lives forever. I go to sit on the bed. As soon as I sit down, my brain instantly recreates that life changing moment. Everything is in vivid detail. I smile thinking back to the event. It was an incredible experience that I will cherish forever. I think I found what I was looking for. I was trying to find the place where it all started. Then I realize that it didn't start here. As soon as this hits me, I return to where it all truly began.

Chapter 25

The moment I arrive, the memories flood my mind. This is the location of our beginning. I still remember everything. I walk over to that spot by the lake where we first met. I remember that I was thinking about how I could be in the games in a few years. I remember him introducing himself. While this moment was brief, it was probably the most important thing that happened to us. This moment, was where we reached the turning point in our lives. This was the point that determined what was to be our future. However, our future is no more. Now that he's gone, most of these events don't matter. The only thing that does matter, is our children. They eventually will need to know the story of their father's beginning with me. This is why I'm here. I'm here for them. I want to be able to recreate this for them, so they know how it all lead up to their birth. A few moments later, I realize there is more to this story. I then wander over to the place of our first date and one year anniversary picnic. All of a sudden, I realize how late it is. It must have taken hours to get from the train station to my old house and from my old house to here. I know this because I find myself looking at the same picture I did when we were here last. The stars are shinning down and reflecting off the lake. The dock is still there. I sit down and stare into the stars. While I sit here, I feel as though he is here, in spirit. I can feel his arm wrapped around me. With his spirit's arm wrapped around me, I close my eyes and try to remember that special moment. I can remember his words perfectly. I can still see him getting down on one knee to propose to me. I can still feel that special kiss we shared after my acceptance. I feel his spirit's lips pressed on mine. He really is here. At least, in spirit. I open my eyes to realize I'm standing in the same position I was during this time. I guess I was really feeling as though it was happening again. At first, I smile thinking back to this point. Here, I was the happiest girl in the universe. I felt like I was on top of the world. I was looking forward to spending the rest of my life with him. I was excited about raising a family with him. Now, all of that has been stolen from me. Once the reality sets in again, I just lose it. While I am strong, cunning, and fearless, I still have my moments of weakness. Everyone is allowed to at some point in their life. This is that point for me. I am at the lowest point in my life. I can't help but cry in his absence. I miss him so much. I need him, but he's gone. I don't know how I'm going to be able to pick myself back up, but I must. I need to pull it together for my kids. They can feel my distress. They express they are worried by thrashing about inside me. I caress my unborn children, and whisper,"Just close your eyes. You'll be all right. You and I will be safe & sound."

Chapter 26

I eventually return to the station to catch a train back to District 12. As I sit on the train, I just stare out into the window. I have no thoughts going through my brain whatsoever. I'm brain dead. After some time, a train employee tells me to get up and go watch the reapings. It is required by the Capitol. Many of the people that are reaped look like trained killers. They have all done this before. They have the skills to do it again. However, I don't even pay attention to their names. When District 2 comes up, I can't bare to watch, but I have to. I stare at the screen, but I block out everything I see. I don't want to relive that moment. It hurts too much. Once they move to the other districts, I try to evaluate Cato's odds of survival. He can beat most of them, but not all of them. At least, not without help. Hopefully, he will align with Katniss and which ever guy that goes in with her. That reminds me. I need to find out who her district partner will be. Eventually, they begin to show the District 12 reaping. Their escort, Effie don't even bother pulling Katniss's name out of a bowl. She just announces that she is going in. She then goes over to a small bowl with two slips of paper in it. I know Peeta wants to be the one to go in, so he can protect her. He would volunteer if he could, but he can't. There isn't much he can do, because it's Haymitch. Looks like it will be Peeta and I consoling each other. He will miss his Katniss and I will miss my Cato. He's going to need me just as much as I need him. He probably is feeling just as much heartache as I am. We can support each other. I then realize Cato was right. I will never be alone. I do have someone that will support me. Peeta can help me raise my kids, although it won't be quite the same. They won't know their own father. They will just know me and their "uncle" Peeta. It pains me that Cato will probably never be able to see them. However, at least there will be some sort of male figure for them to look up to. They will have Peeta. He's a good guy. The other thing too is that he and I will be good friends. Only good friends. He won't replace Cato, ever. He will never be the father of my children. He and I will only rely on each other for support, and nothing else. I'm kind of glad that he will be here with me, instead of Haymitch. He is not the kind of guy I want around my kids. He's always drunk, and he's too sarcastic all the time. He wouldn't be able to support me. He only cares about himself. Therefore, Peeta is the only guy, other than Cato, that I can rely on. Relying on Peeta, is my only option at the moment. I'll just have to see how everything pans out.

Chapter 27

Out of the blue, I hear the Capitol anthem play to represent that the reapings are finished. That brings me back to earth. I then collect myself and go to my room for the night. I'm on the train for 2 days, although normally it only takes 2 hours. The reason it's taking so much long is because this train is stopping in the Capitol to deliver weapons made in the district to be used in the arena. I don't want to be on the same train that holds a weapon that might end up stuck inside Cato or Katniss. This makes me shudder. I need to distract myself from it all. Instead, the whole time I don't eat, or drink anything. I either sleep or watch coverage of the upcoming games, only because its required. On the second and final day on the train, I watch the tribute parade. I then see Cato pop up on the screen. He's wearing a gold gladiator suit. Also, the suit is sleeveless, to show his strong arms. Not to mention it makes him look highly attractive. I can hear the Capitol girls scream as he passes by. However, he doesn't even look at them. He just stares straight ahead. He still has that same look of pain on his face that he had when he left the district. It hurts me seeing him on TV with such agony in his eyes. He yearns to be with me. I long for him. Before I know it, the parade is over and he, along with everyone else, are taken into the training center. I didn't even see Katniss or Haymitch's costume. I was too focused on Cato. Now that the parade is over, I try to figure out how far I am from District 12. I find out I'm about 5 minutes away. I gather my things and am ready to leave the train just in time. The doors open the moment I am ready to go. As soon as I step off, I am surprised at what I see.

Chapter 28

I see Peeta is waiting there for me. He must have known I was coming back. He comes up to me, and gives me a friendly hug. I really needed that. It is the only comforting thing I have had since Cato had been taken from me. He then grabs my single bag and we walk back to the Victor's Village. Once we arrive, he tells me that Cato had spoken to him with instructions on what he wants to happen. He wants Peeta to sleep on our couch until the games are over, so that we are able to support each other, incase the inevitable happens. He doesn't want me to have to go over to his house, because he thinks it's safer for me at ours. He also wants Katniss's mother and Prim to be the ones to deliver our kids. He feels that they are the most trustworthy people capable of handling this. I agree. The last thing he wants is for me to relax, and not worry about him. He will do whatever it takes to get back to me. He doesn't want me to stress. However, he knows that this makes me stress even more. He just felt like he should at least try to lessen my anxiety. I wonder how he even arranged for this. I then realize how this is possible. That night that Peeta and Katniss showed us the nursery, after expressing my gratitude for their hard work, I remember taking a step toward the room when all of a sudden, I slipped on the slick hardwood floor of our house. I then fell backward and hit my head, hard. They then picked me up and guide me back to my room to get me to lay down. I don't remember a whole lot after that. I was half-conscious. However, I do remember hearing Cato discussing something with them outside the door. I barely heard him say,"Make sure nothing happens to her if I end up being reaped. Remember to do these three things..." Then I blacked out. This is what they must have been talking about! He was preparing for the worst. He wanted to make sure I would be ok. I'm glad he took these precautions. They are definitely going to help me through the struggles I will be facing soon. I just wish he was here for them. He may come back. I hope he does. I need him. Of course, if he comes back, that will mean Katniss is dead. I value our friendship highly. She is the only female friend I've ever had. If Cato doesn't come back, she is the next person I would want to come back. However, I prefer Cato to be the one that survives. If they could both come back that would be great. It could happen again. For now, and once again, all I can do is hope.

Chapter 29

About a week later, it is time to present the tributes' training scores. The first people to pop up are of course the tributes from District one. I don't catch their names. Both get a 10. Next up is Enorbia. She also gets a 10. Now it's Cato's turn. I'm sure his score will be just as high if not higher. I am pleased, yet shocked, to see that he got a perfect score of 12. Then again, I shouldn't be surprised. He is just as smart as he is strong. He probably blew the judges away with his amazing skills. Not to mention, that because he is fighting to get back to me, he is highly motivated to win. The other tributes should watch out because his desire to return to me makes him extremely lethal. It is this drive that gets him to preform at his best. This is probably what really impressed the judges. Everything he did, must have proven that he is not only capable, but also his chance of survival is almost definite. That makes me realize that there is hope for us. After his face disappears from the screen, I see that the rest of the people there either get into the high-middle range, or incredibly high. I also find that one tribute, named Finnick, is given a score of 11. His district partner, Mags, who looks like she is in her 70s, only gets a four. There is no way she will make it. She looks to fragile. Eventually, it is time to find out Katniss and Haymitch's scores. Haymitch gets a 10. I never thought he was capable of much, since he was always drunk and lazy. I guess I was wrong. Anyway, the last person up is Katniss. She once again has proven herself as a worthy contender for the games. She also gets a 12, just like Cato. I don't know how she did it, but what ever it was, it really impressed the judges. Peeta and I thrilled to find out that Katniss and Cato have the highest chances of survival. That means that either mine or Peeta's lover will return to us. We just don't know which.

Chapter 30

The next day they begin to interview everybody. The tributes from District one don't have much to say. They give really simple answers. Enorbia is the same way. However, she looks a little nervous while the tributes from District one were calm and collected. Next up, is Cato. Caesar, the Master of Ceremonies, introduces him as the Boy with the Sword. He steps onto the stage in a very stunning blue suit. He sits down and look Caesar in the eye to show that he means business. At first Caesar asks him if he is ready to enter the arena. He says he has to be. Caesar then asks about me. He doesn't say much. Caesar then tries to dig deeper, but Cato won't let him. Cato needs to open up to remind potential sponsors that he needs to come back home, for his family. I wish I could tell him. Anyway, Caesar continues to poke at the subject until, finally, he gets through. He asks Cato to describe me, even though everyone knows me. He just wants to see how Cato sees me. He sighs, "Well , there is a quote I once read a quote that really describes her. It says 'She's like a wild rose. Beautiful and calm, but willing to draw blood in defense.'" Caesar then comes back with,"Are you willing to do the same?" Cato quickly answers with,"If it means that I can return home to her, absolutely. I will do anything to get back to her." Caesar then comments,"The other tributes probably need to watch out for you then." Cato then adds,"Indeed. My drive has made me a dangerous creature. They need to know not to cross me. Every single one of these tributes is an obstacle standing between me and Clove. That is the last thing anyone wants to be. I will take down anything that stands in my path. And I mean anything." Caesar then asks,"What is it that you love about her." He replies with, "Well, to be honest, I can't describe it. No one would understand it. All I can say about is that she is my four-leaf Clover." Come on Cato. I know you are better than this. He is giving the cheesiest answers possible. I don't know why he's not coming up with better answers. The next question is,"How much does she mean to you?" He answers, "Everyone things I have it all now. I'm rich and famous. However, the truth is that without her, I have nothing. She means more to me than anything." The final question is,"What is the last thing you said to her?" He replies,"The last thing I said to her was that I will try to win. And that is exactly what I am going to do. I will win, for her. She told me she needs me. I told her I need her. We need each other, like a heart needs to beat."

Chapter 31

I find myself too distraught to even pay attention to Katniss's interview. While his chances of returning are high, it is still hard on me not having him here. Not to mention, my hormones are making me more emotional than usual. These combined make life so hard to live, but I have to. I just need to keep in mind what is important. As I try to prioritize everything in my head, Haymitch comes up for his interview. However, I can't hear it, because, once again, I'm thinking too much. All of this thinking is driving me crazy. I snap back to the real world when I hear the Capitol Anthem play to signal the end of the interviews. Peeta and I just stare blankly at the screen. We dread tomorrow. Tomorrow, Katniss and Cato might possibly die. Neither of us want to lose them. However, their competition is fierce. I remember seeing some of these people in the games they won. While some won by default, others are deadly. However, between Cato's skilled swordsmanship and Katniss's precision in archery, their combined skills make them lethal. Not to mention that both of them have the same drive to return home to us. As said before, that drive can be fatal to those who stand in their way. I am fairly confident that either Katniss or Cato will return. On the other hand, there is still a good amount of doubt. These other people aren't innocent kids anymore. They are trained assassins. On the other side of this, while these people may be experts in the art of murder, they may lack the abilities that would lead to survival. They may not know about poisonous plants, how to make shelters, or treat injuries and illnesses. However, it is still possible that they have retained this information from before, or relearned it in training. On the flip side, I know that Katniss and Cato do know how to do these things. They are going to have to use every ounce of knowledge they have if they are to survive. I witnessed them doing it during training.

Chapter 32

I remember observing everyone's skills when I was training for the last games. Katniss was the person that caught my eye the most, other than Cato of course. She is the most talented archer I've ever seen. She is also quick witted, and extremely cunning. Her cleverness amazes me. Even after the games were over she still continued to impress me with her compassion and strength. She has always been strong both physically and emotionally. Although, I do remember that one day, she opened up about a moment of weakness. She trusted me enough to see her be vulnerable. She had said to me,"After seeing our competition before the games, I thought that there was no way that I could win, but I had to. I had to win, for Prim. However, she didn't understand that there were guys twice my size, and girls that know 20 different ways to kill you. She has no idea how hard it was. I thought I couldn't make it." That was one of her few moments of weakness. It's a good thing she shared this with me, because it makes me realize that, while many people find that strength and power is the key to life, being open and vulnerable every once in a while doesn't hurt. In fact, being vulnerable every so often makes a person human This vulnerability combined with strength, creates a balanced form of human life. Not many people find that balance, but Katniss has. She has proven that humanity still does exist. Cato and I are also proof of this. As cheesy and sappy as it sounds, the fact that we can love each other in such a cruel world, verifies our ability to not become the corrupt human beings that Panem has created. It gives us the strength to ward off immoral thoughts and ideas that are embedded in the minds of most of the nation's citizens. Ethics no longer exist anymore. Therefore, the people of Panem no longer have virtues. They mostly resort to taking action by force and violence that is directed toward friends, family, and anyone that they deem as a threat to their survival. Whether a person chooses either these actions, or what is right, will determine if that person is a sincere human being, or a cruel and ruthless creature.

Chapter 33

The next day, I wake up, with fear flowing through me. From this day on, for who knows how long, there is a chance of loosing Cato and Katniss forever. I'm so tense, that I can't even get out of bed. Peeta comes in to coax me into getting up. He is feeling the same form of terror I am, but he just hiding it. He is hiding it so he can help me through this horrible ordeal. I need to help him with it too. I have to get up. I need to support him in what ever happens. I have to fight myself to get up. My body is trying to shelter me from the worst by shielding me in my bed. However, I must leave this shield behind and become vulnerable so I can do what I can to support Peeta. Not to mention I have to get up anyway because we are required to watch the games. Once I'm out of bed, Peeta steps out so I can get dressed. As I pull on a plain T-shirt, I feel a kick from the life forms inside me. These life forms are trying to tell me to calm down. They want me to relax, so they can relax. I'm stressing them out. I try to take deep breaths to calm my nerves. I head down stairs and eat a quick breakfast. I look at the clock to see that it is almost time. Peeta and I sit on the couch and turn on the TV to see the countdown begin. I see Cato and Katniss. Their pedestals are right next to each other. I see Cato nod toward her as if to signal something. He then looks around to figure out his surroundings. This arena, is in the swamplands. He will have to wade through who knows how deep of water and mud to get to the Cornucopia. He looks directly into it. I can see that no longer is there light in his soft blue eyes. Instead, his eyes are once again glowing red with anger. He is determined to win. I squeeze Peeta's hand as the countdown reaches the 10 second mark. 10...9...8...7...6...5...4...3...2...1... The siren sounds and he dives straight into the thick watery mud.

Chapter 34

His body rises from the mud a mere second later. He swiftly maneuvers through the muddy earth as if it is nothing. He and Katniss are the first ones to the Cornucopia. They both go inside and grab their key weapons, while everyone else is still trudging through the thick mud. Finnick is the next one there. He grabs a trident. I hope he doesn't go for them. He walks over towards Katniss and points at something. Its a first aid kit. She grabs it and he goes to grab food while Cato works on grabbing camping gear and weapons. Eventually, another tribute arrives. The moment he steps onto the small island that holds the Cornucopia, Finnick stabs him with his trident. He falls backward into the mud. I bet he's gone. After that the District 1 tributes, apparently named Gloss and Cashmere, arrive. They both end up finding some lethal weapons that Cato managed to miss. The male tribute, Gloss, instantly goes straight for Cato, while the female tribute, Cashmere, goes for Katniss. Cato turns around, but not before Gloss stabs him in the back with a knife. Unaware of what has just happened, Cato immediately tackles him to the ground. They wrestle for a bit until finally, Cato manages to push him off the island, into the wet, cold, and dense earth. He seems unconscious. As he begins to sink into the mud, as if it's quick sand, his district partner, Cashmere, stops her quarrel with Katniss to save her partner. Why would he be so important to her? Then I remember that they are brother and sister tributes that won back to back years. She wanted to save her brother. As she tends to her brother, Cato, Finnick, and Katniss grab their supplies, and dive back into the mud to escape the blood bath. Finnick goes, to grab his 70+ old district partner, Mags, from her pedestal, because she isn't strong enough to wade through the waist deep mud, all while carrying a huge sack full of food. They meet up with Haymitch on higher ground far from the , they sort their supplies and set up a base camp. While they are doing so, several cannons begin to fire. I count about 11. That is already nearly half of the former victors gone. By the time it's dark, they are all set up. The faces of the fallen appear in the sky for them. The fallen include, both tributes from Districts 5, 6, 8, 9, and 10, and the female from District 11. However, I'm just glad it isn't Cato or Katniss that died. It was smart of them to form an alliance because a group is always stronger than an individual. They will dominate in there. Anyway, as the night goes on, Finnick offers to take the first watch. Cato steps into his tent and blows a kiss toward the camera. I know it's meant for me. I receive it with relief. He is still the same Cato, and not a killing machine like many of the other former victors in there. He may be a trained, heartless assassin in the eyes of Panem, but to me, he is a gentle father figure with a heart that beats with more power than the Capitol will ever have.

Chapter 35

The very next day, Peeta and I wake up at the crack of dawn to see how Cato and Katniss are doing. While watching the games is mandatory, we are only required to watch it for at least 3 hours or more. We, however, will be watching all day. We turn on the TV just in time to see them packing up their camp. They decide its best to keep moving, with Cato in the lead. They walk for several hours until something pulls Cato under the thick mud. Everyone just stares at each other trying to figure out what to do. I can see some movement in the mud, but I don't know what is happening. I start get worried. Peeta places his hand on my back to try to comfort me. Eventually, Cato's head barely appears. He is struggling against something. Katniss moves toward him and he screams something at her, although I can't here because the audio isn't so great. She walks forward, slowly. She then dives under. I see some more movement under the mud until Cato is freed. Katniss stands up with a crocodile jaw clasped in her tiny hands. The crocodile tries thrashing about, but Katniss has a good grip on him. He nearly squirms his way out of her hands, when Cato finally decapitates him. The croc's body sinks into the mud instantly. Katniss then tosses the croc's head off to the side. Next everyone turns to Cato, who is breathing heavily. His eyes tell me he is in a lot of pain. His left arm is bleeding heavily. He knows that he has no choice but to find higher ground to treat himself. I can feel his pain. He and I are connected in a way where we can feel everything the other can. We are both in agony. On the flip side, Katniss is unscathed and pain free. How she was able to avoid injury, is beyond me. Anyway, the group desperately searches for higher ground for a good half hour before they find it. The very moment they get up there, Cato collapses.

Chapter 36

I cover my mouth to hold back a scream. This could be it. This could be his time. Peeta tries to give me a comforting hug, but I resist, because I am fearing the worst. I can see that, not only is his left arm bleeding heavily, but also both of his legs. The croc must have gotten a hold of both of them. Those things bite hard. I wouldn't be surprised if the croc's bite nearly went through Cato's bones. I wait for a cannon to fire as I watch Katniss work desperately to bandage him up. She eventually has completely bandaged his left arm and both legs, but Cato is still out. I hold my breath, waiting for the inevitable to happen. Then, I hear it go off.

Chapter 37

I begin to sob hysterically as I begin to experience true heartbreak. I am feeling as though a part of me died. He was a part of me. I now realize that the thing I was missing when he left on the train was not him taking my heart. Instead, he was my heart, and my soul. He was the part I was missing all along. Once this hits me, I start to scream at the TV with rage. They not only killed him, but also me. I am dead now. There is no reason for my heart to beat, because it is dead. Peeta wraps me in his arms, trying desperately to calm me down. I watch in agony as Katniss turns him over and places her head on his heart. She then begins to shake him, as if trying to get him out of a coma. Its no use, and she knows it. However, she continues to jiggle his lifeless body. She won't give up because she knows how much he means to me, and how much he can do to bring either himself or her to victory. All of a sudden, a parachute lands right next her. She opens it to find smelling salts. The moment she puts them up to Cato's nose, he's on his feet. My tears of sadness turn to tears of joy, knowing that he is still alive. If he's alive, I'm alive. Anyway, once he realize's that he survived the croc attack, he goes to thank Katniss, and begins to help the others make another camp. They finish just before sun set. Not five seconds after the sun sets, the Capitol anthem begins to play. The face that appears in the sky is the male from District 7. I am so thankful that it wasn't Cato or Katniss. It almost was. I can tell they too are thankful that they will live to see another day. However, Cato is still in severe pain. Katniss notices this, and gives him some pain killers from the first aid kit. The pain killers only take a few minutes to work, because they are so powerful. However, he becomes instantly drowsy from them. Haymitch decides to take watch so Cato and Katniss can rest after their ordeal today. They both crash instantly. Eventually, everyone, except Haymitch of course, is out like a light. Peeta and I turn off the TV and hug each other to celebrate that our loved ones are still alive. We then realize its already midnight. Even though its pretty late, Peeta still cooks us dinner. As we are eating, we hear a knock on the door. Now who in the world could that be, especially at this time of night? We both walk over to the door and open to find two people who, besides Cato and Katniss, are the last thing we expected to see.

Chapter 38

It's Prim and her mother. We immediately invite them inside, wondering why they would be here. I begin to worry that something is wrong. We all sit around the kitchen table and wait for someone to break the silence. Katniss's mother is the first to speak. She says,"Sorry about the surprise visit. We just here to keep an eye on you, since you are so close to being due." She's right. I only have nine days before my due date. I'm going to need all the help I can get right now. I know I should be able to handle myself, but with Cato gone, and my due date looming so close, I should have some kind of support, just in case I do need some help. Anyway, I thank them and show them to the guest bedroom. Once they are settled in, we say good night and head off to bed. As I lay down to sleep, I begin to feel my children stir within me. They're anxious because I'm anxious about everything that's going on now. They want me to remain calm. I probably should listen to them. I stroke my stomach to try to get them to settle down. I eventually am able to fall asleep. Over the course of the next week, we watch as Katniss, Cato, and the rest of their group struggle to survive. They are able to take out the tributes from 1 after they attempt a surprise attack. However, in the unexpected battle, the female from four dies from a knife wound. Finnick is instantly distressed after seeing this. They must have been close friends. Once the battle is finished they begin to get moving once more. They meet up with the female from seven, apparently named Johanna, and both tributes from three. On the day before I am due to give birth, Enorbia and the male from 11 jump out at them at random. They easily kill off both tributes from three, and attempt to go for everyone else. Enorbia goes straight for Cato. She is seeking revenge from when he had pinned her to the ground before our first games. She has the ability to beat him, but I know he won't let her win. Haymitch, and Finnick are unconscious at the moment, because the male from 11 had knocked them out the moment he jumped out at them. Therefore, they can't help him. Katniss is also preoccupied with the male from 11. All of a sudden, in the distance, I see some kind of explosion. Then all I see, is static.

Chapter 39

My body goes numb. I don't know what I have just witnessed. Peeta, Katniss's mother, Prim, and I are all shaking. We are afraid of what just happened. It could be a number of things. My brain is going nuts trying to figure out what is going on. I start to get a headache. I lie down on the couch hoping that lying down will relieve me of everything that is flooding my head. I then lose all of my senses. I have been trapped by a limitless number of thoughts surrounding me. My brain is crammed with so many emotions. My body is riddled with tension and pain. I just lay there, waiting to be released from my mind and body. All of a sudden, I feel someone shaking me. I come back to the world and see Peeta looking into my eyes. He's trying to tell me something. I sit up and he tells me that someone is knocking on our door. However, he doesn't want to answer it without my permission, because its my house. Anyway, I go to open the door, slowly. I am expecting to see President Snow, or maybe some peace keepers to come take us away for some reason. When I open the door, the mockingjay once again flashes into my head as I once again look into the eyes that belong to none other than Plutarch Heavansbee.

Chapter 40

I invite him in, wondering why in the world he would be here. Had something happened to Katniss or Cato that we need to know about? Are we being punished for something? Are we being summoned for something? Anyway, we sit down and he instantly begins to speak. He explains,"Look, this is going to be hard to believe, but an uprising has begun all over Panem. You two, along with Katniss and Cato, are viewed by the people as rebels. The reason why will be explained later. Anyway, President Snow is seeking to find and destroy you, in hopes that if you die, so will the uprising. You have sparked a rebellion. For your safety, you are going to have to come with me." "To the Capitol?" asked Peeta. Plutarch shook his head no. Where on earth could he take us? There is no where else to hide. Snow has access to every corner in Panem. Besides, we are no threat to him. We didn't mean to start a rebellion. How did we do that? I never thought that our actions would cause anything like this. I decide to demand,"Tell us what we did, or we won't come with you." Plutarch replies,"I will explain on the ride there. We need to get moving, before Snow gets to you. He is only a matter of minutes away." "Where are we going then," I ask. He sighs, "To District 13." "District 13", I scream. "I thought it was destroyed!" Plutarch yells back, "I'll explain on the way! We need to go! Pack up your things so we can get moving!" We hastily gather all of our clothes, and everything that is special to us, and board the nearby hovercraft that is hidden in a large bush. Plutarch then leads us into a small meeting room to try to explain everything. He says,"Okay. First of all the people of District 13 moved underground before they were bombed. They still live there to this day. They have been planning a rebellion for years. They just needed to find the right moment to strike. You guys have given them the perfect opportunity. It is critical that you guys are brought back and made the faces of the rebellion." I then inquire, "What did we do to cause all this?" He then goes on with, "Look, this is going to sound really strange, but Panem is mad that Snow let a pregnant person go and fight in the games. Not only was Panem concerned for you, but also the Capitol people. You know they love the games, but they too thought it was unfair to see you go in because you were carrying a new life. As a result, everyone want to punish Snow for this, including the Capitol. Snow is blaming you guys for his troubles. He thinks it's your fault that you let your hormones allow you to get to this state. He feels that if he gets rid of you, the rebellion will cease. This fight is not about you, but for you. Panem is trying to avenge you. Clove, you are the biggest target on Snow's list. We had to save you, or the rebellion will die."

Chapter 41

I cover my gaping mouth in awe. Why would Panem care about me? Sure it was bad that I went into the games as a pregnant teen, but how does that make me any different from any other teenager in the games? I am just as strong and skilled as anyone that has ever been in there, if not more. As I ponder this, Peeta asks,"How does this involve Katniss and I?" Plutarch continues with,"Peeta, Katniss is considered a rebel because she volunteered for her sister. Whenever someone volunteers, its to bring pride to their district. They don't care who's place they take, they just want to fight. Snow doesn't want to see people try to save their family members because the point of the games is to teach everyone that many lives that belonged to the loved ones of several families, were lost from the original rebellion. Plus, they are being punished by having to offer up their younger members of their families as a result of the rebellion. When Katniss volunteered for the games, she contradicted the whole reason why the games are here in the first place. You are here because Snow sees you as a motivator for it all, because you are so good at convincing people. He's afraid that you will turn everyone against him." Peeta and I think about all of this for a while. In the mean time, Plutarch tells us that someone has been sent to rescue Katniss and Cato. After a couple of hours, we land in District 13. The very moment we land, I feel some kind of liquid explode all over me. Oh no. They're early.

Chapter 42

It all hits me so quickly, that I don't even have time to say anything about it. I can feel it happening at a very rapid rate. Everyone sees whats going on and immediately take me to the District 13 hospital. Before I know it, I'm dressed in a hospital gown and being wheeled to a delivery room. Prim and her mother are there to oversee everything. They tell me I've dilated about 5 cm, although I'm not quite sure what that means. They tell me that basically, it means that I'm half way there. I then realize that Cato isn't here yet. I don't want to deliver without him. I need his support. He also deserves to see his children be born. He needs to be here. I explain this to Prim's mother and she tells me that the team that has been sent off to rescue him and Katniss are working as quickly as possible, because they know how important it is that he's here. I then start to feel a couple of major contractions. However, they are infrequent. Prim then informs me that my body is slowing down the whole delivery process. Her mother adds that not having Cato here is stressing me out. This stress is causing my body to hold back on the whole thing. They explain that this could cause complications. We all know that he needs to get here soon.

Chapter 43

After a good 3 hours of waiting, we get word that the rescue team has just returned. Not two minutes later, Cato finally bursts through the door. He instantly returns to my side and kisses me passionately. He then hugs me tight. He doesn't even know whats going on, because he's too focused on the fact that we are together again. I eventually tell him that I'm in labor. He's shocked at first, but he quickly gathers himself, and takes my hand into his. I'm ready now to do this now. I can feel it. On the other hand, I don't know if I'll be able to handle the pain. I have an incredible pain tolerance, but this is probably going to be beyond what I can normally take. I can take being stabbed, beaten, and cut, but this, I know, will be the toughest thing I have ever had to take on. It will be even harder than being in the games. I decide to ask for something to numb the process. However, They tell me its too late to do that. I'm just going to have fight through it. I need to be strong. I will be strong, for Cato and our kids. I squeeze his hand tight as I feel another major contraction come upon me. I cover my mouth with my other hand, holding back a scream. Cato tells me that I shouldn't hold back. He wants me to just let go and stop fighting it. I don't even get a chance to think about this because another contraction hits me even harder. Prim tells me I'm at 8 cm. I am informed that its going to happen very soon. Cato looks me in the eye and he can see my discomfort. This is torture for him. He hates that all he can do is just sit and watch me suffer. He takes my one hand into both of his and kisses it tenderly. He then starts to tell me that I'm doing well, and to keep fighting. He repeats himself serval times. I try to take in his words of encouragement and turn it all into a motivator to keep going. Before I know it, Prim tells me that at any moment now, the children will begin their journey into the world. Not two seconds after that, It begins.

Chapter 44

I scream so loud, that I nearly lose my voice. I begin to sweat. My breathing quickens. The pain is unbearable. This whole ordeal is pushing my body beyond its limits. I'm squeezing Cato's hand so tight, that it begins to turn purple. He continues to tell me that I'm doing great and to try and stay calm. He's fighting back tears, because it hurts him to see how much strain I am putting my body through. Prim steps back as her mother gets ready to guide the baby out. She tells me to push. I scream as I push with all my might. She tells me that she can see the head. I push again, and she is able to see the shoulders. She then says that, if give it one more big push, she should be able to pull out. I take a deep breath. I can hear my heart beat. I'm dripping with sweat. Cato's hand is completely purple. Not once has his eyes left mine throughout this whole thing. His eyes convince me to give it my all. With the last strength I have, I push it through. Prim's mom then exclaims, " I got it! I can get it now!" I can feel her slide the thing out of me. My vision is blurry. I can barely see Cato cut the cord. Prim takes the child away to clean it up a bit. She then tells me it's a girl. I smile to Cato to show that I'm so happy to have our new baby girl. Prim hands her to me so I can feed her. However, I only get 5 minutes to do so before I feel contractions again. Prim takes her to an incubation chamber as her mother prepares for the arrival of our next child. I take Cato's hand again and prepare to start all over. However, the newborn is out so quickly, that I don't feel a thing. I am told that its a boy. I am so relieved to finally be able to hold my children in my arms. I am given a special pillow so I can hold them as they both feed off me. I begin to tear up because I'm thrilled to finally have my children cradled in my arms. Cato too begins to tear up. He kisses my hand again, and says,"Its such a beautiful thing to witness the bond that is formed between mother and child! Its just unbelievable that I am witnessing my children bond with their mother. Thank you so much for giving me these beautiful children. I'm so proud of you!" I start to smile from ear to ear as my body begins to fill with joy. Once they are done feeding I allow Cato to hold each of them, one at a time. He takes the girl first. He looks so attractive with a child in his arms. He pokes at her nose a little, and she grabs his finger. It's so adorable. Seeing this new side of Cato, is priceless. He is officially a father. I'm officially a mother. We are both parents now, and we are enjoying every minute of it. We eventually trade so he can hold his son. Next we realize we need to name them. We decide to name the girl after Katniss, because she is a fighter. We want her to be just as strong as she is. I decide to name the boy Cato jr., after his father. I want him to be just like his dad. Cato disagrees, because he feels he is not that special. He knows I won't take no for an answer. So it's settled. Our kids are named Katniss and Cato Jr. At some point, we give them to Prim and her mother so they can lay them down for a nap. I am so relieved to finally have them out. Don't get me wrong. I loved the experience. I just wanted it to be over, because it's been way too long since I've felt relaxed. I then notice that Cato is bleeding from his forehead. His legs are still bandaged, and he can barely stand. His legs are really wobbly. I suppose he was so focused on getting to me, he didn't even notice that he needs medical attention. I tell him to go clean himself up, but he refuses. He wants to stay by my side. He doesn't want to leave me again. To be honest, I want him to stay. And he does. After a couple hours, we allow Peeta and Katniss to come in and see our kids. They congratulate us, hold them for a few minutes, and step out so we can be alone again. I'm in the hospital three days. They want to keep an eye me, because I lost a large amount of blood somehow. Cato doesn't leave my side once. He still won't get the medical attention he needs. I won't nag him about, because I don't want stress him out more than he already is. On the third day, about an hour or so before my release, we hear a large explosion. Then we hear gunfire.

Chapter 45

I start to get really nervous. Cato gets the kids for me, and he, Prim, and her mother begin to wheel us to an emergency exit. However, we are stopped by several peacekeepers. They're here for us. I don't know what to do. I look to Cato to see if he can figure this out. He kisses me and the kids on the forehead, pulls out a hidden sword out of his pants, and charges into the hoard of peace keepers, cutting them to pieces. I can hear his anger and pain. It's a distraction. The peace keepers are focused on him. Prim and her mother wheel me and the kids out a secret passage and to an emergency hover craft. As the door closes, I scream, "No, no! We can't leave him!" Prim's mom then says, "We need to get you to safety. We have no choice. He sacrificed himself for you. He would want you to go." I don't even listen to her. I've lost him again, and this time, probably for good. As the hover craft starts to take off, Prim takes the kids from me and I stumble out of the stretcher and run towards the window. I then get a glimpse of him become submerged under the sea of peacekeepers. I begin to bang on the window and cry, "No Cato, No! No, no, no! Cato! Cato! No! Don't leave me...please! I need you! I need you like a heart needs to beat! Please...don't go."

END OF BOOK II