There is a very good possibility that this is going to get very old very
fast. But anyway this idea has been bugging me for awhile so I wanted to
try it out. What if the main characters were all switched around? That's
right, you heard me! In this story I'm going to take the major characters
and switch them with other people. The story will be the exact same thing
as before, only different people will be filling the roles. So basically,
you can laugh at the absurdity of it all. Anyway I can't really explain,
so just enjoy!
Title: POTC: The Curse of the Messed up Cast By: QueenoftheEggs
Disclaimer: This is very silly. Don't get angered..be happy!!!
Mist surrounded a lone ship as it made its way over the dark ocean. The waters were calm and silent, the only sound that could be heard was that of a very feminine high pitched one, drifting out from the ship.
"I feel pretty. Oh so pretty! I feel pretty, and witty and gay!" A boy in a dress with a mop of dreadlocks for hair continued to sing. He was unaware that behind him a hand was reaching out for his shoulder. The hand grasped him tightly and he shrieked so loudly that the hand's owner quickly withdrew it so that he could better cover his ears.
"Quiet, missy! Cursed pirates sail these waters. With your awful singing they're bound to jump aboard and slit our throats as punishment!" A scraggly looking man with yellow eyes warned the boy. At the mention of slit throats, the child's eyes grew wide with fright and he allowed a tiny whimper of fear to escape him.
"Mr. Barbossa. That will do." Sternly, a woman lectured him.
"But she was singing in an E flat when this song distinctly called for a B minor. Frightful bad luck to sing that much out of tune with this unnatural fog, mark my words."
"Consider them marked." The woman replied, disinterested. "On your way then."
Pouting, the man named Barbossa skulked off muttering to himself. "Tis also bad luck to bring a boy dressed up like that on board. Even if his dress is pretty."
Looking up at the woman with her blonde hair tied back into a prim ponytail, the boy exclaimed, "I'd rather like to meet a pirate someday."
"Think again Miss Sparrow. Vile and dissolute creatures the lot of them. I intend to see that every man who sails under a pirate flag or wears a pirate brand gets what he deserves." And she gave him a grim smile that made him shiver inside. "A short drop and a sudden stop."
Unsure as to what that meant, the boy turned to look at Mr. Barbossa. But he was too busy playing with his monkey pet to notice.
"Lieutenant Swann, stop freaking out my daughter." The Lieutenant nodded and apologized to the African woman standing behind her.
"My apologies Governor Maria," the Lieutenant winked to the boy in a seductive manner. He cringed and waited for the scary lady to leave. When she did she replied to her father,
"Actually, I find it all fascinating."
"Yeah, I know. Yeh little freak. Stay outta trouble now." And Governor Maria turned on her heel and left Miss Sparrow alone again. At first he became amused when he saw a floating white wig in the water. But suddenly two arms surfaced near the wig, and then a head appeared underneath it.
"There's a boy wearing a wig in the water!"
Mr. Barbossa rolled his eyes and shoved his monkey back into his pocket. It screeched and protested until he bonked it on the head with his meaty fist.
"Governor, I thought you told us Miss Sparrow's medication had kicked in!"
"Usually she's fine by now." The woman stroked her chin in thought. "Maybe the doctor gave us the wrong prescription at the last port we visited."
"No! I'm not crazy this time! There's a boy wearing a powdered wig and he's drowning! Somebody save him."
The governor strolled over to where his daughter was pointing and chuckled on her way over.
"Now, dear, I'm sure it's just a figment of your..Bleedin' Christ you ain't kidding! There really is a boy!"
Quickly, the Lieutenant, Barbossa, and other men ran to look over the side of the ship. Much to their surprise there really was a boy flailing in the water. He was coughing and sputtering and his white wig was askew as he tried to remain above the surface.
"Man overboard! Throw something in to save him! Don't let the wig get ruined!" The Lieutenant cried. Quickly men scurried about, tossing a rope to the poor boy. Eventually they pulled him onto the ship's deck.
"Eh! Since yeh ain't got anything better to do, watch the kid with the wig. Make sure the Lieutenant doesn't go off and molest him or something." Rolling his eyes, Miss Sparrow headed over to where the boy with the wig lay. His breathing was labored and his white wig was lying crookedly on his face. Trying to fix the wig, Miss Sparrow began rearranging it until the boy grasped the other boy's hand and began gasping for air.
"What's the matter? You're not drowning anymore."
"Oh. I'm James Norrington."
"I'm Jack Sparrow, I'm making sure the lieutenant doesn't molest you."
James nodded and then collapsed back, hitting his head on the wooden crate which he was resting upon.
"Ow." He muttered, before falling asleep.
When he fell backward, Jack noticed that something was sticking out of his pocket. At first it looked as though it was soaking wet paper. But upon closer inspection he Miss Sparrow realized that it was a movie script.
"Y-you have the correct casting appearance for this movie. If anyone gets their hands on this then I might not be allowed to wear pretty dresses. Oh no!"
"Damn.I mean, has he said anything yet?" The Lieutenant asked, noticing that Miss Sparrow was guarding the new addition to the ship.
Jack gasped and quickly shoved the script down the front of his dress. When he turned around her lied,
"His name is James Norrington. That's all I found out."
"Hm. I see, take him below." The Lieutenant ordered his men. Before he turned to leave he stared at the new addition to the front of Jack's dress. Seductively smirking, the Lieutenant kept his gaze on the new growths a moment longer before turning on his heel.
Breathing a sigh of relief Jack watched as the other crew members pointed and stared at the burning remains of another ship. It was obviously where the boy had drifted off from.
'Amazing that he even survived,' Jack thought. Suddenly he noticed something moving across the water. Squinting his eyes he realized it was a ship with black sails, and they were tattered and torn. A pirate flag flapped in the breeze as he blinked once, and then it was gone.
A/N: Don't get too concerned about the him's and her's..it's meant to be confusing. Love it hate it? Review so I know!
Title: POTC: The Curse of the Messed up Cast By: QueenoftheEggs
Disclaimer: This is very silly. Don't get angered..be happy!!!
Mist surrounded a lone ship as it made its way over the dark ocean. The waters were calm and silent, the only sound that could be heard was that of a very feminine high pitched one, drifting out from the ship.
"I feel pretty. Oh so pretty! I feel pretty, and witty and gay!" A boy in a dress with a mop of dreadlocks for hair continued to sing. He was unaware that behind him a hand was reaching out for his shoulder. The hand grasped him tightly and he shrieked so loudly that the hand's owner quickly withdrew it so that he could better cover his ears.
"Quiet, missy! Cursed pirates sail these waters. With your awful singing they're bound to jump aboard and slit our throats as punishment!" A scraggly looking man with yellow eyes warned the boy. At the mention of slit throats, the child's eyes grew wide with fright and he allowed a tiny whimper of fear to escape him.
"Mr. Barbossa. That will do." Sternly, a woman lectured him.
"But she was singing in an E flat when this song distinctly called for a B minor. Frightful bad luck to sing that much out of tune with this unnatural fog, mark my words."
"Consider them marked." The woman replied, disinterested. "On your way then."
Pouting, the man named Barbossa skulked off muttering to himself. "Tis also bad luck to bring a boy dressed up like that on board. Even if his dress is pretty."
Looking up at the woman with her blonde hair tied back into a prim ponytail, the boy exclaimed, "I'd rather like to meet a pirate someday."
"Think again Miss Sparrow. Vile and dissolute creatures the lot of them. I intend to see that every man who sails under a pirate flag or wears a pirate brand gets what he deserves." And she gave him a grim smile that made him shiver inside. "A short drop and a sudden stop."
Unsure as to what that meant, the boy turned to look at Mr. Barbossa. But he was too busy playing with his monkey pet to notice.
"Lieutenant Swann, stop freaking out my daughter." The Lieutenant nodded and apologized to the African woman standing behind her.
"My apologies Governor Maria," the Lieutenant winked to the boy in a seductive manner. He cringed and waited for the scary lady to leave. When she did she replied to her father,
"Actually, I find it all fascinating."
"Yeah, I know. Yeh little freak. Stay outta trouble now." And Governor Maria turned on her heel and left Miss Sparrow alone again. At first he became amused when he saw a floating white wig in the water. But suddenly two arms surfaced near the wig, and then a head appeared underneath it.
"There's a boy wearing a wig in the water!"
Mr. Barbossa rolled his eyes and shoved his monkey back into his pocket. It screeched and protested until he bonked it on the head with his meaty fist.
"Governor, I thought you told us Miss Sparrow's medication had kicked in!"
"Usually she's fine by now." The woman stroked her chin in thought. "Maybe the doctor gave us the wrong prescription at the last port we visited."
"No! I'm not crazy this time! There's a boy wearing a powdered wig and he's drowning! Somebody save him."
The governor strolled over to where his daughter was pointing and chuckled on her way over.
"Now, dear, I'm sure it's just a figment of your..Bleedin' Christ you ain't kidding! There really is a boy!"
Quickly, the Lieutenant, Barbossa, and other men ran to look over the side of the ship. Much to their surprise there really was a boy flailing in the water. He was coughing and sputtering and his white wig was askew as he tried to remain above the surface.
"Man overboard! Throw something in to save him! Don't let the wig get ruined!" The Lieutenant cried. Quickly men scurried about, tossing a rope to the poor boy. Eventually they pulled him onto the ship's deck.
"Eh! Since yeh ain't got anything better to do, watch the kid with the wig. Make sure the Lieutenant doesn't go off and molest him or something." Rolling his eyes, Miss Sparrow headed over to where the boy with the wig lay. His breathing was labored and his white wig was lying crookedly on his face. Trying to fix the wig, Miss Sparrow began rearranging it until the boy grasped the other boy's hand and began gasping for air.
"What's the matter? You're not drowning anymore."
"Oh. I'm James Norrington."
"I'm Jack Sparrow, I'm making sure the lieutenant doesn't molest you."
James nodded and then collapsed back, hitting his head on the wooden crate which he was resting upon.
"Ow." He muttered, before falling asleep.
When he fell backward, Jack noticed that something was sticking out of his pocket. At first it looked as though it was soaking wet paper. But upon closer inspection he Miss Sparrow realized that it was a movie script.
"Y-you have the correct casting appearance for this movie. If anyone gets their hands on this then I might not be allowed to wear pretty dresses. Oh no!"
"Damn.I mean, has he said anything yet?" The Lieutenant asked, noticing that Miss Sparrow was guarding the new addition to the ship.
Jack gasped and quickly shoved the script down the front of his dress. When he turned around her lied,
"His name is James Norrington. That's all I found out."
"Hm. I see, take him below." The Lieutenant ordered his men. Before he turned to leave he stared at the new addition to the front of Jack's dress. Seductively smirking, the Lieutenant kept his gaze on the new growths a moment longer before turning on his heel.
Breathing a sigh of relief Jack watched as the other crew members pointed and stared at the burning remains of another ship. It was obviously where the boy had drifted off from.
'Amazing that he even survived,' Jack thought. Suddenly he noticed something moving across the water. Squinting his eyes he realized it was a ship with black sails, and they were tattered and torn. A pirate flag flapped in the breeze as he blinked once, and then it was gone.
A/N: Don't get too concerned about the him's and her's..it's meant to be confusing. Love it hate it? Review so I know!