Bonnie Bennett is not a fan of winter. She thinks as she is standing on her porch and can feel the sharp sting of the wind from the air. She takes a step forward her boots feeling heavy from the events of the day and clutches the row of keys in her hand to put them in her back pocket. She instantly regrets not wearing gloves because the chill of the air is quickly sinking into her jeans and she really wants to go inside but she can't shake the fact that something is wrong.
And she has never been wrong about this kind of feeling before so she retracts her step toward the door and convinces her aching body to get ready. Trouble seems to like it in Mystic Falls and Bonnie is not one to back down from a fight. Especially at home.
She curls her hands into fists that feel like frozen bricks and the muscles in her stomach turn to stone as she sees the shadow coming toward her shape into someone she recognizes. She narrows her eyes to make sure she isn't tired enough to hallucinate.
Nope it's him.
"Damon." An exhausted breath.
He casually yet cautiously takes the last creaking step onto the porch that suddenly is a little too crowded for Bonnie's liking. What does he want?
"What are you doing here? I thought I told you Elena is fine." She bites out without actually meaning to.
Must be the cold weather
For a moment she feels guilty for her outburst but silence ensues for a second, that turns into sixty strung together waiting for someone to say something. Anything.
Damon has yet to say a word. He just stands there with his head craning at an angle she has never seen before. Needless to say it makes her uncomfortable. What is wrong with him? Why is he acting so weird?
He looks as if there is something he's choking on from the inside yet he manages to take a breath he doesn't need. The silence is too consuming and Bonnie feels her heartbeat race with anticipation. There is a inescapable sinking feeling in the stone pit she calls her stomach as it hits her.
Something must have happened.
Oh no.
"Damon.." she whispers taking six small steps to close the gap between them. He doesn't flinch only watches her with a ice cold blue meant to stop her.
"What's wrong. Is it Elena?" she hears herself ask and slowly closes her eyes in anticipation of the answer.
He swallows something like air and Bonnie opens her eyes to find her personal space now belongs to the both of them. She inhales sharply. He smells like cedar and sympathy but there is something else she can't quite decipher about him. Bonnie is not so cold anymore. In fact she feels a slight heat start in her hands as they start to itch. She has to pull her hands from her back pockets just to quell the urge to touch him.
But really it is his gaze that is setting her on fire.
Why won't he just say something because what whatever it is, my mind has imagined worse.
"Damon" She asks for a third time. "Are you okay?" leaning her head up entirely over the neck of her thick cashmere sweater to see the wrinkle in his forehead closer. He looks like he is struggling with something he doesn't want to let go of, something that will change everything.
She has a feeling she's about to find out.
"IknowElenaisfine" comes out in one swift exhalation pushing a white puff of frozen air into her face. He is still standing way too close and Bonnie shifts her weight to the heel of her boots because she doesn't quite believe him. He must have read her mind because he parts his alabaster lips to speak when she continues to stare at him.
"I-I ca.." He gulps again but this time forces himself to speak between ragged breaths. His Adam's apple more visible with each passage of the seconds between them.
She has never seen Damon Salvatore act like this. He has never, in the time that she has known him, staggered over his words. He has always said exactly what he was thinking especially if it wasn't popular opinion. Even more if it had the added bonus of pissing someone off. He never does this. Ever.
Not around her anyway.
Okay this is really weird
Her thoughts were broken by his body movements.
"I came to see you" His eyelids seem heavy for the first time in his life and he is struggling to keep his focus on her face.
The leather of his black jacket makes a noise when he drops his right shoulder a centimeter. Bonnie averts her eyes for a second in that direction before saying that he is in fact seeing her but has yet to tell her why. She quirked her lips into a crooked smile waiting for the usual Salvatore retort but it never came.
All of a sudden the air is so thick she thinks she is going to need a shovel to get back to her front door.
His first sentence.
"What you did today…Bonnie"
His second.
"I didn't know you would."
There is a slight pitch in his voice as he says his next.
"I didn't know we were.."
He gulps again, this time with his mouth open and she can see the glint of his bottom teeth in the glow of her porch light. She tilts her head to the left making her hair sway a little in the polar breeze.
Don't do it. Don't do it Damon.
He has to imagine squeezing the life from someone's heart to make a fist while fighting the urge to push her hair behind her shoulders again.
She narrows her green eyes at him cautiously.
"What?" "Friends?"
He nods in response and a lock of raven hued hair falls into his eyes. He wants to move it but he knows he NEEDS to keep his hands at his sides.
She breathes out white smoke that disappears almost instantly. "Well I think we're working on it Damon." Shrugging her shoulders and pulling at her sweater as nonchalantly as she can trying to melt the tension in the air, she smiles again and there it is.
Wow
He swears he has never noticed it before now. The unrestrained emotion in her smile, the light in her eyes making them dazzle like pools of jade he wants to dive into. She means it when she says they can work on it. But after today Damon knows they can never be just friends.
Nope never going to happen
"We bypassed working on it when you took a bullet Bennett." He slowly muses ,drawing out every syllable, dropping his head to look into those pools he loves so much. She cowers a little at the distinct memory of the bullet ripping through her abdomen with a searing heat she hopes to never feel again. Hanging her head so that her brunette bangs cover most of Damon's body from her view she releases a soft breath. "It was—"
"It was meant for me." Unfolding his fist he lifts her chin with his index finger as lightly as he can. "And you took it. I just-" His pale hand travels away from her face carefully and he can feel the scratching in his throat threaten to devour him whole.
"It was necessary." A pause. "To save Elena"
Damon's eyes slowly float down to the worn oak panels of the porch and Bonnie catches a glimpse of something she has only seen reserved for the resident damsel of Mystic Falls come to the surface.
He wets his lips.
"Our definitions of the word necessary must be vastly different because I don't take bullets for my almost friends Bonnie." He steps closer and she can see the subtle veining in his neck as he swallows again. "I was wrong but you, Bennett witch that you are, stepped in and did what you did. And you can say it was for Elena or the greater good or whatever you need to believe but-"
Bonnie feels her mouth open to suck in air that is too cold for her lungs and Damon does the same. They seem to breathe in unison for a moment.
Only a moment.
"We both know Elena wasn't in any real danger." Never breaking eye contact he can feel the heat from her body a few inches away from his as she struggles to find a breathing pattern right for the occasion. So he takes it upon himself to be spontaneous as he grazes her right cheek with the back of his cool hand and smirks when she closes her eyes under his touch. "But you did it anyway." he spoke without breathing.
"That's why I'm here." He cups her face in his grasp slowly and she jumps at the feel of it. She attempts to step back and sort out her thoughts at the realization of what is happening but her boots are welded to the porch from the intensity of his eyes meeting hers. He places a shaky hand on her waist and instantly feels the rush of electricity between them. He can feel her trembling underneath the fabric of her sweater. "To say. thank you"
Oh God no..please
Just as Bonnie is about to ask him what he means by saying "thank you" when she feels his lips crash into hers. The force of it makes her lose her balance and his grip tightens around her waist. The heat in her hands has now spread to her entire body, flushing her cheeks with warmth. Bringing her into his chest Damon fights for entry into her mouth and for some reason she allows it. "Mmm" Leaning into him, she closes her eyes and he tastes like bourbon and vanilla. A sweet burning she didn't know exists. He moans as the kiss deepens until she is completely absorbed. Shit. Damon thinks he has never had something like this before. The taste of her lips overwhelms him to the point where he just wants to steal the very breath from her body-keeping her close forever. So that's what they do. Keep each other close,locked in the arms of one another, burning holes in the resolve they claim to have. Until an extremely shaky hand with mocha skin and purple nail polish presses into the blade of his shoulder slowly pushing him back.
They break apart and try to breathe normally only managing to fail. Bonnie slowly opens her green eyes and meets Damon's crystalline baby blues doing the same. He slides his hand from her waist and notices he has never heard a heart beat louder than hers.
Damn
She looks at him stunned-speechless.
She searches his eyes for something she guesses she saw earlier. And when she finds it, he smiles before she has the chance.
Rubbing his thumb across her cheek he cups her face again placing a feather weight kiss to her forehead. She shudders at the motion and he keeps her there a second longer than he should. If he didn't love the sound of his name on her lips he would have never heard it.
"Damon"
She moves her hand to her chest and he takes a step back, watching her. The tension evaporated into nothingness. She wants to say something he knows she does.
Maybe she wants to yell at him, tell him he's a pig, fry his brain for doing what he did. Damon won't give her the opportunity.
"Thank you Judgy."
He lets out a shaky breath he didn't know he needed to hold in front of her.
Damon slowly adjusts the lapels of his leather jacket and licks his lips taking in her appearance. She is almost one with the glow of the porch light. He knows she has never looked more radiant. The usual moss green of her eyes now a malachite lime, Damon feels a slight tug in his chest he didn't know was there before and he suddenly doesn't want to leave her. Something he will obviously never tell the witch.
That would change everything
What the hell am I talking about? I just kissed her!
Shuffling his right boot over his left leg he turns away from her. And he can already feel the cold seeping into his bones again. Not saying a word he descends the steps slowly knowing she is watching him. His shoulder slump from the trite anticipation that she will hate him again but he forces himself to straighten them.
Bonnie is suddenly aware that it is January the second Damon lets her go. I hate the cold. Feeling the arctic frost nip at her heart and she wishes for the heat him trudge through the dirty snow leaving her porch, she senses he wants to say more. Do more. Have more. But he keeps walking and soon he reaches the end of the sidewalk where he parked his car.
The lingering desire still on Bonnie's swollen lips she traces two fingers over them and hitches her breathing.
Damon has his hand on the door handle when he lifts his head to survey his witch standing alone in the angelic halo of her porch light. This is the only time he will ever see her like this. She has her body turned to the side in the exact position he left her. Frozen like the winter-tide.
He closes his eyes so he can hear her steady her lungs to breath again and grins to himself because he also heard something else.
"You're welcome."
He opens his eyes at the sound of keys rattling a deadbolt just in time to see the door ease shut. Behind the door he can hear that she finally has her breath back. He can see the outline of her silhouette against the door, her back attempting to hold her weight against the entryway. Floundering into his front seat Damon takes a beat before starting the engine. Waiting.
Bonnie can still feel Damon all over her body almost like he has never left. Almost like they are more than friends. She takes a while to stand up on her own knowing her legs are still pretty much useless. But keeps her fingers pressed to her lips until she hears the familiar hum of his car shift into drive and disappear down a street and away from a porch that no longer feels the same as yesterday.