Author's Note: IT'S MAH BIRTHDAY!

Vladimir: *Pops champagne bottle* TIME TO GET WASTED!

Me: FUCK YEAH! Except... This was started over a year ago, so it is now no longer close to my birthday. It is in fact four months away.

Vladimir: Oh... Well. Sucks.

Disclaimer: Shigesato-san owns these boys, and the rest go to their respective Nintendo/Sega/ whatever else producers, not me.

/OO/

Dim lights. Music filling the room. Thirty-plus guests of all shapes, sizes, and dimensions talking, laughing, and having a good time. Tonight was Ness's birthday party, and all the smashers were in attendance, not just the younger ones. Yoshi was dancing with Nana, Pikachu was biting part of a broken pinata, and the birthday boy himself was eating a slice of chocolate cake next to Lucas. "Isn't this fun, Luke?" He asked. "I wish it was my birthday every day!"

Lucas smiled and leaned against his boyfriend. "But if every day was your birthday, you'd be too old for me." They'd started dating about a month ago, and had been happily together ever since.

Ness nodded with a grin on his face. "Yeah, I guess you're right. Still, it'd be nice for parties like this to happen more often." He looked around the room at all the guests, seeing that even Bowser was having fun dancing with Peach while a protective Mario watched from the sidelines. His eyes eventually rested on Snake, who seemed to be drinking something other than punch. "Hey Snake," he called, "what are you drinking?"

The intimidating man looked over to the capped psychic with a crooked grin. "Just something that I brought myself. It's nothing a little kid like you could handle."

This, of course, sparked Ness's competitive spirit. "Oh yeah?" He challenged. "What could you be drinking that you think I can't take?"

Snake smirked at the now fourteen year old. "Whiskey, kid. Alcoholic drinks aren't meant for someone so young."

Ness placed his cake down on the table next to him and stood up. "You wanna bet?"

Snake laughed, holding his hands up. "Ooh, watch out everybody. We got ourselves a badass here."

"Um, Ness," Lucas spoke up, "I don't think this is such a good idea. Aren't you too young for alcohol? Something bad might happen."

Ness waved a hand in his boyfriend's direction, his expression one of pure confidence. "What's the worst that can happen, Luke? Can't be any worse than being mushroomized." He pointed at Snake. "Let's see just who it is that can't handle alcohol, Snake."

Snake raised an eyebrow at the capped psychic. "Are you challenging me to a drinking contest?"

Ness smirked. "I guess I am." By now, the two had attracted the stares of most all of the smashers, interested to see how this would go.

Snake chuckled at Ness. "Well then, let's go. Hey everyone!" He called, getting everyone's attention. "Ness and I are having a drinking contest down at the bar!" This brought about a few cheers from the smashers, along with a few concerned murmurs from the more sensible party goers.

"He's just a young teen!" Zelda cried.

"Oh this is gonna be so awesome..." Falco snickered.

"Heh, bet he'll beat your ass, Snake." Samus laughed.

"Hey! I'll have you know I can handle my liquor very well, Samus!" Snake said indignantly. "Now, to settle this at the bar. Bring your boyfriend, Ness. Someone has to carry you back to your room once you pass out after two sips of beer."

"Ha! We'll see who passes out after two sips! Come on, Lucas!" Ness started marching behind Snake, following him to the stairs that would lead down to the cellar.

Lucas sighed and stood from his seat, running to catch up to his boyfriend before everyone left and cut him off. 'Does he even know what he's getting into?' He thought. Lucas caught up to the two, the rest of the smashers now walking behind them. "Ness, I really don't think you should do this. Have you ever even tasted an alcoholic drink before?"

Ness looked over his shoulders at the blonde, grinning and ruffling his hair. "No... But there's a first time for everything, right? Why not now?"

Lucas gave his boyfriend A deadpan expression. "For starters, you're underaged." "

Minor detail," Ness said, leaning over and kissing Lucas' cheek. "Anyway, the challenge is calling my name." With that, Ness took off down the hall to pass Snake, eager to prove himself.

"Ness, wait!" Lucas yelled, struggling to get through the crowd of people that had slowly but surely gotten ahead of him. "Damn it Ness, I'm making you sleep on the couch tonight!" Lucas hoped that Ness heard him, but if he did, the raven didn't show it.

Snake and Ness descended the stairs at the end of the hall, the later having been unable to pass Snake by due to the older man blocking his every attempt. The other Smashers followed behind the two excitedly, looking forward to some entertainment. By the time Lucas made it down the stairs and into the cellar, Ness and Snake were already seated on two brown wooden stools at the bar. Two drinks were placed in front of them, courtesy of Wolf, and Ness flashed a confident grin up at Snake. "Ready when you are, old man."

Snake smirked down at the young teen, picking up a glass of amber liquid and holding it out slightly towards Ness. "We'll see how ready you are, kid. Cheers."

Ness picked up his own glass and clinked it against Snake's, then brought it up and tilted his head back for a drink.

/OO/

Lucas sighed, walking through the halls of the mansion as he carried his drunk boyfriend on his back. "I told you this was a bad idea, Ness." The capped psychic had been able to handle three drinks, but after that...

"C'mon old man, less keep goin'. I could do this aaaaall night," Ness said, his speech a little slurred from the three beers he'd had.

Snake chuckled, reaching a hand out and ruffling the drunk teen's capped head. "I don't know, kid. Can you even lift up your glass?"

Ness leaned back, bringing one hand up to weakly bat Snake's hand away from him. "Dun' touch me! Of course I can lift the glass!" Ness demonstrated just how badly he couldn't by grabbing onto the handle of the glass with trembling fingers, slowly lifting it off the bar. It shook so badly while he lifted it that almost a quarter of the beer sloshed out of it and onto the wood of the bar.

Snake sighed, reaching out and gently pulling the drink out of the teen's unsteady hand. "Alright kid, I think you've had enough."

Ness slapped Snake's hand away, pointing a little off-centeredly at him. "I dun' need you three to tell me when I've had 'nough!" Ness slammed the glass down on the bar, spilling more beer in the process, and unsteadily stood up on his bar stool. His unfocused eyes drifted over the crowd of Smashers watching him before landing on a pink ball he recognized as Jigglypuff. He smiled, lifting one arm and pointing at the Pokemon, and started to speak again. "Jigglypuff... I've always, um, loved your... Jigglyness."

The pink Pokemon blushed and placed a stubby arm to her cheek. "Jiggly!"

"Nothin' can come between our love, Jiggles! We will be togetha!" With that, Ness fell forward, landing flat on his face on the unforgiving stone floor.

Lucas sighed and shook his head at the memory, feeling his boyfriend shifting on his back. "I hope you're proud of yourself, Ness."

They arrived back at their shared room less than five minutes later, Lucas being just the slightest bit worried about his boyfriend's lack of response. He turned the doorknob to their room, pulling it open and walking inside. He flicked the light switch on and made his way over to Ness' bed, moving him from his back to the mattress. After setting the capped psychic down, he examined his face and saw that his eyes were closed. "Ness?" he asked, "Are you awake?"

Ness opened his eyes and gave the blonde a goofy smile. "Hey Lucas... Know somethin' funny about mistah' Game And Watch?"

Lucas blinked a few times, not expecting a question like that, but decided to humor his drunk boyfriend. "What, Ness?"

Ness giggled for a few seconds before answering. "He's flat."

"...Hilarious."

Ness giggled again, a contagious sound, and nodded his head in an exaggerated motion. "I knooooow... It was funny cuz I said it."

Lucas rolled his eyes, shaking his head slightly. "You're going to be so hungover in the morning, you know. We have brawls scheduled tomorrow."

Ness waved a hand in Lucas' general direction, not looking at all bothered. "I'll deal with that later." His hand reached out, grabbing onto Lucas' shirt. "Luke... Will you sleep with me?"

Lucas eyed Ness suspiciously. "Define 'sleep'."

Ness whined. "Aw come on, you know I wouldn't try anything bad! 'sides, we're too young for anything like THAT yet."

"We're both also too young to be drunk, but look at you now," Lucas countered.

Ness looked up at Lucas with a pout on his face, trying his best to win his boyfriend over. "Pleeease? I swear, you can kick me out if I do somethin' that makes you feel uncomfortable."

Lucas looked at Ness for a while longer, then gave in with a sigh. "Alright, but you try anything and your ass is going on the floor, got it?"

Ness nodded eagerly, scooting over and holding his arms out for the blonde.

Before Lucas got in, he moved over and pulled off Ness' shoes so he could sleep more comfortably, placing them down on the floor. He then slipped his own off and lay down next to the capped psychic.

Ness smiled and held the blonde close, rubbing his cheek against his boyfriend's. "I love you, Luke." He moved to place a kiss on the other's lips, but met a hand on his mouth pushing him away instead. "Mrah?"

Lucas smirked and shook his head. "Sorry. Maybe when your breath doesn't reek of alcohol, Ness."

Ness let out a muffled whine from behind Lucas' hand, moving to bury his face in the other's shoulder. "You're killin' me here, Luke."

Lucas laughed quietly, rolling his eyes and pulling the covers over them. "Whatever. Go to sleep."

Ness grumbled to himself for a while, but slowly quieted down. His breathing evened out, and within minutes, he was asleep.

After waiting a bit to make sure his boyfriend really was asleep, Lucas took off the capped psychic's hat and hung it on the bedpost. "Happy birthday, Ness..." he muttered, yawning widely. Tonight sure had been eventful, and he knew he'd have to apologize to Jigglypuff in the morning for Ness' behavior, but for now he was content to fall asleep next to his boyfriend.

/OO/

Author's Note: Poor Jigglypuff, getting all embarrassed like that. I admit, I had way too much fun writing the scene with drunk Ness. At first I was going to skip over it, but then I thought 'Nah, you guys would want to see exactly what happens.' So what'd you all think of this? Please let me know in a review, and I will see you next time I write my lovelies!