Saber had long since lost the right to call his circumstances shocking. Waking up by himself but with the clear evidence of a partner the night before was as familiar as drinking for him. The fact he couldn't even recall what happened was also a familiar sensation, along with the pounding headache from a night of too much of a good brew. Too bad he wasn't drunk anymore; putting two and two together hurt like a bitch. Come to think of it, the only thing he noticed that WAS different was his face; no stinging sensation of being slapped. Shit, maybe he was finally improving after nearly fifteen years as a mercenary… back to now though.

He took in his bed; tattered sheets, multiple patches of dried fluids, and it sounded like the supports were about ready to give. Whoever she was, he'd give her credit for trying; the marks on his back and the saliva on his dick were a good indicator she'd be into him. No lipstick though; guess he wasn't THAT much of a catch. Then again, tavern wenches rarely dolled themselves up that much unless they were already gunning for a catch. Still, he enjoyed the feeling of crisp sea air, the sound of pounding rain at his window, and the wet stench of…stone? The inn at the harbor didn't have stone in its construction.

Wait…we're not in the harbor anymore…'

That's right: they'd left the harbor a few days ago and were trying to reach the Temple. Something about more brigands, a mountain… there was an earthquake at some point. It wasn't until a particularly nasty flash of lightning illuminated his hazy world that he remembered what happened. How the upcoming storm had kept them from reaching the mountain village and forced them to turn around and take refugee in an old fort near where they'd saved those Pegasus Knights earlier. So if they didn't make it back to the harbor, and they weren't pushing forward...oh hell.

They were about a few hours away from any villages or other settlements, no one else had come by the night before, and ever since the incident on Barth's fortress, their merry band had totaled himself, the Priory kids, and Valbar's men. He KNEW that his mystery lay was of the fairer sex, so that meant there was only one explanation… "Well damn".

Saber considered his circumstances and his surroundings. Again, minus feeling sore and hung over, there was no other signs of struggle; nothing that suggested any kind of foul play. Considering the trio of girl's arcane gifts, it didn't seem like there were any signs of burns or in the case of the rosette, scorched impacts. Saber was strong, he could proudly admit that. But even he would be in trouble in the face of magic wielders, and he knew that at least two of them were not shy about resorting to spell flinging when the chips were down or backed into a corner. As for Curls…well, he'd seen those three poor souls that had been drained of their life force thanks to the cleric's ghastly Nosferatu, and HE was still kicking if the pain in his head was any testament. Still, he couldn't help but be annoyed at the scenario now presented to him.

It wasn't just that he'd fucked one the girls, it wasn't even that they were barely past the cusp of womanhood. Sure he usually stuck to women that served mead, but the youngest they'd go was about nineteen. It wasn't even the fact they were women of the cloth; there'd already been a couple of blasphemers on the road. No, it was the fact that CLEARLY they'd enjoyed one hell of a night, and he couldn't. Remember. Squat.

'Alright, think Saber…' "Fuck, that hurts." He hissed, regretting his plan immediately. Still, he wasn't going to get anywhere by doing nothing, so he tried to piece together the fragmented pieces of his past actions the best he could. They made it back to this fort: check. They took shelter only to find it was well stocked, not surprising considering the Brigands that had previously occupied it. So with nowhere to go and nothing else to do, they did what adults do when presented with the chance; relish.

Celebrating; always a fun time. Plenty of good food and drinks… LOTS of drinks now that he thought of it. Turns out Valbar could down an entire keg and still come back for more. The kids meanwhile weren't as resilient, but at least the boy knew he had limits and had the sense to step back early.

Getting to the three; the rosette was drunk, the little healer claimed she had a stomachache and barely even touched a mug before turning in first, and the lass was only about an hour behind, but had a clear stagger to her gait. She'd definitely had some of the Ram Wine; of that he was certain. He could even see her sitting with Leon talking about something or another with two nursed glasses in arms reach of both. Somehow, the thought of wine brought a familiar sensation rushing back…

She leaned up to capture his mouth, pushing him back against the dresser. He could taste the faint trace of wine on her lips, barely registering above his own alcoholic intake. Still, it was a nice flavor to add to her passionate mouth-fucking. His hand grabbed the back of her head and pulled her closer, practically impaling his into her mouth and engaging her in a dance of tongues. Not to be out done, his clandestine partner wrapped her dainty hands around his broad shoulders, the soft material of her nightgown rubbing against his scarred rugged chest…

That didn't mean squat. He knew all three had similar nightgowns from their days at the Priory thanks to taking laundry duty a few times…at least until Mae freaked out and barred him from washing their clothes. It's not like he even touched their underwear; He didn't clean ANYONE'S undergarments but his own and stated that on no uncertain terms. The lips could've been a clue, if only because he didn't recall any other tastes outside the wine, and he knew that of the three only Curls elected to keep her mouth free of balm. The only thing she used was perfume; a mixture of lilac that offset Mae's stronger scent of oranges (for whatever inane reason) or Celica's lack of enhancement.

That COULD have been enough… if it weren't for the fact the storm had washed away any fragrance or makeup the duo had before they managed to reach the fort. After a quick change of clothes, all three had the same scent that night, meaning that smell wasn't a good lead. Saber took his mind off the investigation long enough to reach for his set of pyrite and flint, using the two minerals to ignite the candle that'd burned out hours earlier. But the warmth near his hands prompted another memory to spring forth…

He snaked his hands around her sides and fondled her modest breasts, causing her to moan as she leaned into him. They had moved away from the door and were instead up against the wall by the bed. He had pressed her against the stonework, dwarfing her with his raw muscled form. At some point he'd been robbed of his trousers, while in return he had taken her panties and tossed them aside, leaving him bare and her with a bunched-up nightgown. He could feel the warm gap in her hips constrict his erect dick, creating a pleasurable friction that served to further stimulate him and his efforts to honor her. As he continued to squeeze her lovely melons, the material of her nightgown passed over his hands from its place at her neck. Now trapped between her tits and the thin garment, Saber continued his ministrations as she sped up her grinding, his mouth going to her exposed neck...

Well there was a lead; find the girl with a hickey, and he'd find the source of his pleasurable plight. He'd confront them in secret, see what she knew or remembered, and if necessary make a bribe to keep it from ever coming to light again. On the off chance it was the Lass, he'd keep his promise to get her to the Temple, make sure she was safe and not carrying a child, and then leave immediately after confirming she wasn't. If it was the other two…well he'd have to get creative. First things first; find the one that's covering her neck today.

'Wait, they all wear collars anyway…damn.'

So that plan was a bust. He could try to see which one had sore marks on her breasts from being forced against the wall, but somehow he'd doubt that would go well. Maybe the girl had left one of her things behind? A headband, gloves, maybe some stockings or…underwear! Saber regretted his snap of brilliance as the sharp tone only served to aggravate his hangover. 'Mother Goddess, it's been a few years since I got it this bad…not since that time in…where was it?' He mused. Still, he'd been in worse shape before and had to drag himself up under more dire circumstances. It took a few tries, but in little time Saber was up and clumsily slotting his legs into his trousers. Once the leggings were sloppily secured, the mercenary started to grope around his chamber, finding a lead midway between his bed and the door.

There was no doubting that the errant underwear had landed here; the drying puddle on the stonework was as good a lead as he was going to find at any rate. His legs protested his movements after their hours of wear the night before, and he limped/crawled his way back to remains of his fornication and rest. He sat down on the opposite edge of the bed; the side that had been facing the door…

When he had entered her, he felt her barrier break and quickly locked down on her screaming lips. He'd held her close, rubbing circles across the small of her back and leaning in to whisper words of encouragement into her ears, breaking pattern only to wipe the tears from her eyes. He waited for her to move before he started, knowing that it wouldn't be long before he lost all inhibitions. As their tempo increased, his hands instead shifted down to her hips as he matched her pace; meeting her thrusts with his own. Drunk with pleasure, her head leaned back in bliss. He could just make out the mark where he'd been necking her; the rest of her head was still bathed in the shadows. Her hips continued to slam into his pelvis; her rhythm aided by the way they sat on the edge of the bed. The sight of her nightgown (once again over her breasts) draped past her shoulders gave the illusion of long hair…or maybe her hair WAS that long and the gown was just making it harder to see?

It was difficult for him to make out her face; even knowing what her hair looked like would be enough of a clue, seeing as how all three had varying lengths and texture. But all he could faintly recall was feeling the material of her nightgown, or the warm touch of her smooth skin. Maybe another scan around the floor could lead to some clues? With his muscles still protesting, he once again stood up from the edge of the bed and started to stumble around the small chamber. It took a few passes, but finally he found a new lead rolled into the corner and out of the dim light of his candle.

"Oh Mother, you've got to be pulling my leg…" he muttered as he made out the discarded vial of cream. Whoever she was, she was a kinky sort; not only had they partaken in some tongue dancing and the two-backed beast, but apparently sodomy was also part of the deal. Better news; his hips might be screaming like a randy goat, but his ass wasn't. Meaning that he wasn't the one taken up the cavern. THAT was an experience he'd been spared thus far and wasn't keen to cross that creek…

Still dark; shock of all shocks. What had changed was him now laying on the bed and the view front of him. Instead of looking up at the vague sign of exposed breasts and a head thrown back in sexual joy, he was being presented with an ass that practically hypnotized him as it devoured his cock. Hwas sitting over her and clearly had the reins, thrusting into her tight little rear like a man possessed. His hands weren't on her luscious cheeks, but rather had bunched up her hair into two streams near the base of her scalp and were yanking her head back. Somehow he was sure it was HER idea, if the fact she was calling herself a dirty pony could be accepted. He could almost make out her voice, she sounded like…

*KRACK-BOOM!*

"Damn storm, how the hell did I manage to get any sleep last night?" Saber muttered as his erotic memory was shattered by the storm. He'd finally started pulling together his rougish uniform, fumbling with the deep neck green undershirt that exposed his well-worn chest. He wasn't fool enough to try with the belts or his bandolier; too many incidents of sliced fingers to make that mistake again. Instead he'd waste his time trying to secure the knots for his vest and leggings whilst going over any loose ends of his evening. Nope, he had nothing. At least not until he finished lazily tying the right legging together and staring down the end of his bed…

He could just make out the slowly blooming light of the sun outside his window, giving him just enough illumination to make out the definition of his chamber. It was a wonder that anything managed to break the blanket of wet clouds that had haunted them for the past few days, really. Speaking of, whatever blankets he had used was just barely covering his chest, exposing the grizzled and weathered body he had earned through years of being a sellsword. His vision was still blurry, but even with one good eye he could make out something off about his bed, namely the massive lump that was situated near his legs. That explained why his crotch was currently engulfed in someplace warm and wet, or the dainty fingers that were fondling his nuts. Such soft hands, almost like gloves now that he thought of it…

"GUUUUHH!"

"WHAT WAS THAT?!"

"Where did a damn Cantor come from?!"

"By Mila, they're at the DOOR!"

"Everyone outside NOW!"

Saber snapped out of his thoughts and stumbled over to the window. Sure enough, there was a nasty surprise waiting just outside; a horde of Revenant Terrors. Further off in the distance, Saber could just make out the unmistakable silhouette of their master; a Cantor. On the bridge between the fort and the land, a few of his companions were already out and striking back against the horde, fighting their way to the cackling summoner.

That sounded like a good workout; he'd always been better at springing back from a rough night with some good old combat. Maybe it would take his mind off the lewd memories or the throbbing erection that was now protesting against his pants…

"Ugh, if there's one thing worse than the smell of a Terror, it's a CHARRED Terror…Boey." Mae pinched her nose to fend off the smell as she glared at the target of her ire.

"Oh, ha, ha. And I suppose that tossing 'big hurty lightning' at them didn't have a hand in that?" The young mage crossed his arms and gazed at his partner-in-whine. Behind him, the ashes of his previous foe were being scattered by the wind and rain that pelted them.

"Well, obviously… I mean, that's… Shut up, Boey."

"Will you two focus? We're not done yet!" Kamui yelled back, deftly dodging a Revenant's claws before delivering a slice that bisected the reanimated corpse in twain. A second tried to pierce him, only to be blocked by Valbar's shield. The knight was bereft of his usual armor save his helmet, gauntlets, and boots. Still, he was more than a match for the rotted flesh of the Terrors.

The Cantor was already dealt with by the time Saber got there; nearly dead and spent of potential magical ability. Unfortunately, Celica and her comrades were being pushed back by the numerous Terrors he had already summoned. Too bad for the cultist the one-eyed mercenary had a perfect shot, and with a quick dash swiftly lopped off the emaciated man's head. With their caster's death, most of the Revenants crumpled to pieces, leaving only three left to deal with.

One was cut down by Celica, her Blessed Sword disintegrating the undead abomination in cold blue light. The second attempted to flee, only to be struck in the back of its head courtesy of Leon's precise aim. Finally, Mae blasted the third away with another bolt of her lightning, causing the last Terror to scream in pain before going limp. The band of eight let out a staggered chorus of pants and exertion. Somehow, despite being caught off-guard and with their pants-down, they'd managed to survive.

"That the last of 'em?" Saber asked as he turned back to his comrades, flicking the blood off of his Golden Dagger. A nod from Kamui and Genny let the mercenary drop his shoulders, content that everyone seemed to be okay. And hell, at least he wasn't the only one that wasn't dressed in full.

"Nice that you could finally join us Saber. I trust you slept well, seeing as how long it took you to get your ass out here." Leon asked with a clear bite to his tone, his right shoulder missing its usual pauldron. Boey crossed his arms, his body making the same statement without a single word spoken. He too was missing something, specifically his black cloak and one of his gloves. The group had returned to the fort and were lingering in the entryway, listening to the pounding of the waves below, the rain above, and their own prater within.

"Bite me, pretty boy." Saber growled, locking gaze with the archer across the way.

"Sorry: not interested."

"Oh just kiss you two; save us all the headache." Mae groaned as she massaged her stiff neck. She'd claim her bed had been just a bit too cramped, even for her tastes. Celica likewise rolled her shoulder, wincing from when one of her slashes over-extended against a Terror and caused the sore muscle to stretch too far. Minus a few of their flairs like Celica's pauldrons or Mae's shaw, the two were already dressed, suggesting they'd been already up for some time when things went south. Genny limped her way over to the group, her staff working to heal the blow she'd suffered earlier. Like the other two she was lacking her full outfit; in her case it was her bow and the cuffs on her wrists. Besides those omissions, all three looked the same as always.

Saber silently cursed the fact that all three already had their necks covered; it'd be impossible to make out which one he'd been suckling the night before and finally pin the identity of his amorous, anonymous partner. Even as she handed the surprisingly heavy magical staff to Valbar, he tried in vain to scan the youngest girl for any signs of his handy work to no avail. His thoughts were so consumed with his perversely intentioned investigation he barely made out when someone spoke up. Specifically, it was the knight Valbar who had been trying to dodge errant lightning the entire battle thanks to his armored helmet and shield. "Looks like that storm won't be letting up anytime soon; guess we're here for another day."

"Great, so were stuck in this old fort for another night? I'd rather take my chances out in the woods, pretty sure this place is haunted." Kamui muttered as he crossed his arms, leaning against the wall as Genny sat down to rest. When he didn't hear a response, he looked up to see his comrades looking at him with a mix of confusion and curiosity. "What, none of you heard the moaning last night? The woman that was wailing or the beast growling? It started after everyone else went to bed and kept going for hours! Couldn't sleep a damn wink even after things quieted down."

If Saber was even the slightest bit sober, he'd probably have put two and two together and had the decency to look ashamed. Then again it was probably in his favor that he WASN'T sober, since Kamui would've put things together much faster if he saw the look of guilt on the ex-pirate's face. Instead it was the trio of young women that bore guilty faces, something that Leon noticed with an ire-soaked 'hmm?'

"I-I'm sorry; my stomach was hurting last night." Genny meekly whimpered. It was her first time trying shieldfish, and clearly her body was not keen on the dish. Having similar experiences with some rancid meals in the past, Valbar related to her plight. Wordlessly the knight kneeled down to Genny and helped her stand, giving the cleric much-needed support for her tired and weary body. Figuring she should come clean herself, Mae followed up with her own admission.

"I had WAY too much of that wine. No idea if that was me or not though, can't remember a thing." Mae bluntly admitted, rolling her gloved fingers through her hair and letting out an un-ladylike belch. "Oh Earth Mother, this is the worst." She groaned as she stumbled, being caught by Boey before she could hit the ground. The dark-skinned mage looked in equal parts pity and disgust at the uncouth behavior of his companion, but said nothing as she silently cursed her poor life choices. That just left Celica looking guilty, and it wasn't until the others continued to silently judge her that she told her own story.

"I…might have had a rough night. My apologies." Celica simply declared with a bow, briefly losing her footing before catching herself with the Blessed Sword. It was no secret that the poor priestess sometimes woke up in a cold sweat with visions of doom and despair still fresh in her mind, even if she wasn't willing to admit it at times like this. His ire briefly forgotten, Leon had the manners to offer a sympathetic hand to the maiden.

"Don't beat yourselves up about it girls; not every day is going to go as smoothly as we'd hope. You three go and get some more sleep; the rest of us will take turns on watch for anymore cultists or brigands." Valbar explained, his tone shifting from paternal concern to a stern military figure. It was obvious that the knight was taking the first shift, with Kamui chiming in as backup. Boey tried to insist he'd help Mae back to bed first, only for her to harshly turn him down while Saber just gave a non-committal grunt.

"Well, I'M going back to bed; don't wake me up the next time we have a crisis or your going to be the next 'ghost' of this dump." The flamboyant archer warned as he stumbled back into the keep. Valbar and Boey were shortly behind him, with Kamui instead opting to practice muttering about a cursed woman's pleading. That just left Saber and the girls to collect themselves at the entrance.

"W- Who does that guy think he is? I don't need hel-" Mae couldn't even finish her rant before the mage practically keeled over, only being caught by Saber before she hit her head against the stone wall. "…Shutting up now." She meekly decided as she pulled herself out of the mercenary's strong, firm grip and stumbled to the opposite wall where her friends were stewing.

As Saber leaned back against a column, he took the chance to examine the three pious women. He didn't doubt that one of them was hiding something; the question was, who? It was obvious that all three were suffering in some way. Pigtails was clearly nursing a hangover like she said, so at least part of her story checked out. Then again, HE was dealing with the same thing and had the extra challenge of trying to find out who he'd taken to bed last night, so Mae wasn't off the hook, especially not when he could vividly recall hands as soft as gloves: perhaps like hers…

Meanwhile, the Lass looked to be exhausted and barely standing - no doubt due to her nightmares. Another alibi, but one that could easily be compounded by a night of fun. Being honest, Saber was skeptical that Celica was the one; he'd be sure that even drunk off his ass he'd be able to remember HER proper voice trying to express sexual thrill. Still, he would be lying if he said that he'd regret if she WAS the one, especially after some of the nights they'd spent regaling stories together. Well, mostly him to her; not a lot of excitement on a Priory turns out.

Finally, Curls… well she just looked timid and insecure, so no changes there he guessed. She didn't seem to have any more issues with her stomach, but seeing as how Genny was a healer, that was easily explainable. Saber could recall some of the times he'd catch her glancing at him from afar, getting nervous and trying to meekly get away. Clearly she had some issues with him or he brought out some unpleasant memories, he figured. If she couldn't stand him on the battlefield, what would compel her to end up in bed with him?

All three had at least a solid act behind their purported plights. Speaking of plights, his own headache was back in full force; guess the adrenaline had worn off and he was back to being a barely-functioning sort. There'd be time to try and investigate later, so the question now became; what to do now? Go back to bed, or stay up and keep vigil with Valbar while downing some more wine? As he stumbled past the three to meet the knight, his thoughts processed what he knew one final time.

'Great way to start today; waking up with a hangover, assaulted by some nut that tosses out Terrors, and I've fucked one of the young women in my charge's little party… Well finger's crossed there's more Ram Wine.'

Guess it only makes sense to post what's arguably my most famous story from A03, huh? In case anyone's wondering, the future chapters will be focused on presenting 'what-if' scenarios for the three possible girls. I HAD planned to just release the truth and move on, but after how well-received the story was and how much fun it was to read other's speculation, I decided to use this story as a jumping-off point for other possible scenarios.