Harry, Ron, and Hermione entered Hogwarts. They took their seats at the same table that they sit at every year. They waited for Dumbledore to walk up to the podium. He walked up to the podium and said, "Good evening!"
"Albus Dumbledore!" yelled Professor McGonagall.
"Yes!" said Dumbledore.
"I can't believe that you have a 'World's Greatest Dad' coffee mug," said McGonagall.
"Shut up about that!" yelled Dumbledore. "Now, where was I? Now I remember. First years, the forbidden forest is off limits even though most students go into it anyways. It is off limits! Now, may the feast begin."
Nothing happened. All the tables were still empty. Dumbledore stood at the podium and said, "Let the feast begin!"
Again, nothing happened. Dumbledore looked furious. He stood there and yelled, "Damn house elves! They must have rebelled on us!"
Everyone stared at Dumbledore with a look of shock on their faces. "Albus," said McGonagall.
"Don't Albus me!" yelled Dumbledore. "Everything is falling to crap! Voldemort has returned, I can't find any of his horcruxes, Snape's gonna kill me at the end of the year! It's just not FAIR!" Dumbledore was in tears. All the students were quiet. Then Hermione spoke up and said, "YES! THE HOUSE ELVES ARE FREE!"
Dumbledore pointed his wand at Hermione and said, "Avada Kedavra!" A flash of green light shot out and hit Hermione straight in the forehead. She collapsed down on the floor. "Somebody, go and check the kitchen," said Dumbledore.
Professor Flitwick jumped up and ran over to the kitchen door. He opened it. House elves were dancing around in a drunkish motion while listening to Take it off by Ke$ha. Flitwick closed the door.
"Students," yelled Dumbledore. "Off to bed."
"But we're hungry!" complained a couple of kids.
"Well then," said Dumbledore. "Slytherin, cook us some food."
From that moment on, no questions were asked. People only wondered why the house elves rebelled, and why Dumbledore had a mug that read, "World's Greatest Dad".