Vernal Equinox.
Chapter One: Teenage Dream.
Now, I must say before I start, it is not that I am ungrateful nor is it that I do not recognise I live a very charmed life. Infact, I have quite the blessed life. I never have to have money concerns for my entire life - and that will be a long time, forever actually, as long as no one tries to kill me - as well as a large family who loves me. I know that.
What drives me crazy however is that my family is so huge that there is always at least one person with me or near me at any one time. I can't even escape it when I'm asleep. Seriously, there is always someone watching me sleep although for the most part it is either my parents or my Jacob. As I'm nearing my seventh year of life I know my teenage hormones are racing around. Considering how fast they race around in humans its twice as bad for me. However, I feel stifled. I feel like I'm suffocating, and honestly, it feels like I have absolutely no real say in my life.
Sure, I can choose the colour of my room or decide what to have for dinner that night - well almost. It had to be healthy. No junk food for me. However I could not decide to go to school, that was very clearly a hell no as far as my father was concerned, I couldn't decide whether to wear a onesie at all let alone for the rest of my life (hey! They look comfy and sooo cute), nor could I even decide whether I wanted to date. None of the major decisions in my life were mine to make, and when my parents thought I was getting too... out of hand they'd send me for a trip up to Alaska with the Denalis and called it a holiday.
It also did not help my father insisted I play the piano at the same time every day. I loved music, I did, especially the classical stuff my father plays however doing it every day and studying with one of the members of my family over some college or university course of study was starting to drive me crazy. I was a teenage girl! I had been proper all my life and right now I just wanted to... Well, go wild I supposed. I wanted to just do things I wanted to. I wanted to sit in a cute pink rabbit onesie with every piece of junk food known to man and watch the likes of True Blood where there was always a hot guy around with his shirt off - that was another no-no. I may be a teenager but apparently I was not allowed to feel the likes of lust, attraction, a crush, or love for the opposite gender. This was hard however with Jacob around. He didn't know it of course but I was starting to develop feelings for him and considering how often he was shirtless - which was a lot, thank the lord! - it wasn't hard to see why I was attracted. He, however, was oblivious. As usual. Which also drove me crazy.
I huffed as I let my face fall against my desk with a thud, growling in fustration as my massive volume of hair covered my face and went into my mouth. That was another thing that drove me crazy. Why the hell did my mother have so much hair? I wish I could just cut it but Alice, Rosalie, and my mother wouldn't let me. Apparently it was just so pretty. Yeah, try handling it fresh out of the shower when it looks more like a frizzy poodle then actual human hair.
"Renesmee, its time to play your piano."
I heard my father call. Now, I've heard the tale of how I got my name and its so sweet. I appreciate that but god is my name a mouthful and my parents refuse to call me Nessie which actually sounds normal. I wanted to be normal so badly. Just do normal things.
"Sweetheart,"
Came the voice of my father who was now leaning against my doorway. That was another reason I was fustrated. There was absolutely no secrets in this house - unless you were my mother - and I had a mind-reading dad to boot. I couldn't help but feel that my life sucked. I mentally groaned before lifting my head off the desk, blowing upwards whilst attempting with one hand to get my bronze hair away from my face before glancing at my father with the usual polite but friendly smile everyone put on for appearances. Yeah, there weren't even any humans around.
I reached a hand out and placed it gently on the palm of my hand. It was useful that my desk was right next to my bedroom door.
'I'm coming father.'
I told him before he could comment on any of my thoughts. God knows I did not want to talk about it. Yell maybe but definitely not talk. However it just wouldn't feel right to yell at my parents. Its not like I couldn't verbally talk. I did a few times when I was smaller, mostly whilst the Volturi were causing trouble after my mum turned into a vampire, however with my gift I didn't need to so I didn't bother. All of my family tried to get me to talk at first once they noticed it but by now they were all used to it.
Forcing back the need to sigh I got off my chair and brushed past my father before using vampire speed to go down the stairs to the piano that was located right by the Bay Window. I let my fingers slide across the keys as I played my father's lullaby for my mother. A standard tune in this house. Sometimes it was odd to realise I learned this when I looked two years old. As I played I found myself grumbling about the outfit my aunts Alice and Rosalie got me into. Even my closet wasn't my own.
Today they had forced me into what could only be described as a cute sailor dress that was apparently in fashion. It was mostly white with a thick stripe of blue on the end of both sleeves and a thinner white stripe just above that. The collar was the exact same, but a proper shirt collar, with a bow right in the middle at the front of the neck. White buttons went down the front of the dress up to the waist, making the upper portion look like a sophisticated navy sailor officer's jacket. The bottom of the dress was a prim white skirt, no pleats just straight with the usual triangle shape to it when looked face on, with blue lace patterns at the bottom of the skirt. They had paired it with a pair of white stockings that had 'pretty' blue bows at the top with a strap that attached the top of the stockings to the waistband of my plain white underwear. A pair of white flat shoes was on my feet with the same two blue stripes over the toe of the shoe. I managed to talk them out of a french Beret that apparently would have gone 'just perfect' with my outfit.
I just hoped to god Jacob didn't see me like this. It would make me appear even more like the 'kid' of the family then I was already.
Clearly god was not on my side because not only did Jacob saunter in through the front door directly in my line of sight but he was also wearing a t-shirt. It had to be one of those rare times he wore a t-shirt. Now I didn't even have a pleasurable sight to look at whilst he laughed at me. I watched him cautiously as he gave a simple nod to my father who had just come down to sit in his chair - mother was out hunting with the girls - before turning towards me. He always seemed to have this radar when it came to me. It was rather odd but considering my family I didn't bother questioning it.
Unfortunately Jacob gave the reaction I was dreading. He chuckled, barely holding really loud laughter I usually liked so much because it made him look like a jolly beacon, as he stepped closer towards me.
"Getting ready to join the Navy Nessie?"
He teased, ruffling my bronze hair as if I was a kid. I couldn't help it. I knew whilst I erupted I would feel bad afterwards but it was just the straw that broke the camel's back that day. I stood up, fists clenched, as I spun on with a growl of my own.
"LEAVE ME ALONE!"
I snarled, before in a blur of vampire speed I was out of the house and speeding through the forest of Forks.
We had only returned halfway into my sixth year of life since my mother wanted Grandpa Charlie to be able to see me as I finally matured on my seventh birthday. Of course it would be say it was my seventeenth since that was how old I look. Before then we had given Alaska a go. The snow's novelty had worn off rather quickly for me. Well, it had once I looked twelve years old anyway.
When I eventually stopped running I realised I had ended up on the edge of the cliffs in La Push. I couldn't help but smile just a little. I was the only Cullen allowed on Pack territory. That sorted out my family although Jacob could still come after me. I sighed. He probably would. He never liked seeing me upset, and honestly I didn't like to hurt him. I didn't even mean it either... I was just fustrated. I hadn't meant to take it all out on him.
Sighing deeply, I plopped down onto the grassy floor as I let my legs hang off the edge of the cliff. I let my legs sway back and forth as I ran my hands through the grass and soil beneath me. Sometimes it was just so tempting to run for the horizon, never stopping and never looking back.
"Ness?"
Came a soft, concerned voice which I knew belonged to Jacob without even looking at him. I looked over my shoulder, noticing he was shirtless which meant he must have ripped his shirt when phasing (and his cutoffs too although it looked like he had left a few pairs around the forest in La Push), as I gave him an apologetic look.
"I'm sorry my Jacob. I just don't like this outfit."
I told him, although deep down I knew it wasn't entirely the truth. It wasn't a lie but I wasn't telling him what the whole truth was.
This was my life. I was grateful for it. My mother died to give birth to me as well as my whole family, vampires and shapeshifters alike, had stood up to the Volturi as well as had been prepared to fight them just to keep me alive. They had done so much for me so what else could I do but continue this existence as it was?
It wasn't a bad life to be honest. I would never have to want for anything. My family had so much money there was no way it could be counted. They had their own island for god's sake and it was given as a gift from Carlisle to Esme. We could get anything in the world without a problem. I would never starve. I would never be short of anything. However, although I had freedom from everyday human woes, I didn't have the kind of freedom I wanted. I couldn't just leave the house without an interrogation of where I was going, how I was going to my destination, and my own personal escort. I couldn't even loose the escort either because they were supernatural themselves so they would find it incredibly easy to track me down should I even try.
Games of tag with all my family (including Jacob) when I looked under ten years old taught me that.
It would be nice though that if one day I could finally have the freedom I was begging for.
However, as I stood up and took Jacob's hand, letting him lead me back to my house in Forks I knew it wasn't going to be this day. It most likely wasn't going to be tomorrow either. I'd probably have some kind of punishment tomorrow for yelling and running off.
All this in the daily life of a vampire cross human hybrid by the name of Renesmee Carlie Cullen. Eh, just call me Nessie. I'd much prefer it.
Author's Note: I blame this on watching Breaking Dawn part two tonight and for the first time. -.-' I couldn't help myself. I'm so very, very sorry...
