A/N: I'm So sorry for the wait, I've been dealing with some stuff and it has been one hell of stressful time. Postings will hopefully occur regularly, this work has gone through four different rewrites and well, here we are!
Warnings; course language, sexual situations, mentions of drug use, and underage alcohol consumption.
Chapter 1: Tick-Tock.
Steve sighed dejectedly as the phone continued to ring in his ear, this had to have been the fourth time he's called today and Tony still wasn't answering his phone.
A beep and then "your call has been forwarded to an automatic voice messaging system, the master of your universe, is not available, at the tone please leave a message"
Steve sighed again "Hey Tony, it's me again, for the fourth time, listen for a second; I really miss you. We haven't seen each other since the end of August and I can't even remember the last time we had a conversation that lasted more than two minutes. I'm starting to get a little antsy here, give me a call back please? I love you."
Steve hung up his cell phone and placed the unobtrusive device on his bedside table, he still lived at home commuting to NYU where he majored in art and illustration, the fact that he didn't have to pay for a dorm helped out with cost, most of his savings going to his tuition and supplies.
It was honestly insane, Steve pondered laying back on his bed with another sigh, Tony was only a bus ride away from where he was attending MIT, and it was starting to get a little ridiculous that they saw each other more when Tony was halfway across the country in California rather than four hours.
Steve rolled onto his side looking at his phone with vague hopefulness, the last time he had spoken to Tony was three days ago, when Tony had called with exciting news that he'd be able to graduate a year early, having tested out of most of the required classes.
The phone sat silent; the screen blank on the table, causing another sigh to drift from Steve's barely parted lips, he got the busy schedule, really he understood, Tony was fast tracking to early graduation his work load would be immense.
Steve himself was already buried under a ton of projects and essays, his bedroom scattered with half formed ideas and concepts on paper littered around the room. His sketchbook lay open on his bed by his feet, a few top quality charcoal pencils atop the high grade sketch book; both had been birthday gifts from Tony.
Well actually, Tony had given him a gift card for an art store for his birthday and told him he didn't know shit about actual art supplies as he did most of his designing digitally, and to get himself something.
Sure, the gift was a little impersonal, but then Tony really didn't know much about art, and the amount on the card had been generous, Steve still had more than half of the remaining balance left over, planning on putting it towards his supplies when he would need to reload on them.
"Steve?" Steve sat up, looking to the open door where his mother stood, a basket of folded laundry balanced on her hip, "is everything alright?" Sarah Rogers was a beautiful woman, strong and confident, with sunshine hair barely turning grey and laugh lines at the corners of her mouth, showing her sense of humour and good nature.
"Hey Ma," Steve breathed moving to stand to his feet; he loved his mother very much, always appreciating how hard she worked to keep them afloat. It hadn't been easy when his father passed away, but Sarah was a tough woman, and she was a very loving person, accepting Tony with open arms and an open mind. It had honestly stunned Steve at how well his mother and his boyfriend got along; they shared a love of music and bonded immediately over it.
"Do you need some help?" Steve asked, nodding his head towards the basket in his mother's arms, Sarah shook her head, "answer the question mister" her voice held a teasing tone, knowing her son well enough that she'd have to drag what was bothering him out of him tooth and nail, Steve disliked talking about his problems, preferring to deal with them himself.
"It's nothing Ma, just…it's stupid." Sarah hummed, "I noticed Tony hasn't been around the last few weeks" she commented knowingly, Steve gaped, "it's scary how you do that" he finally said, Sarah laughed softly, "Steve, I'm your mother honey, it's my job to know these things, and you miss him."
The unasked question floated in the air around them, "we didn't have a fight or anything" he began, knowing that's what his mother suspected, "he's on a fast track to early graduation and he's been insanely busy with extra work and we haven't really spoken all that much lately."
Steve ran a hand through his hair, messing it up more than the pillow had, "I find it odd that we saw and spoke to each other more when we lived in different states, now he's barely a few hours away, living in an apartment his family owns, we're a mere bus ride away from each other and we don't even cross paths!"
Sarah nodded, leaning against the door frame, "well Steve, high school is easier than college sweetie, sometimes you have to put things into perspective, now is the time you work hard to have a good life, and that puts a strain on any relationship, you just have to bear with it for a bit, once it's over imagine all the time you two will have, and thanksgiving is coming up very soon and he's already agreed to spend it here with us. Steve, you just need to have a little patience honey, and remember how much Tony loves you, and things will work themselves out."
Steve opened his mouth to respond, but at that moment his phone lit up with a picture of him and Tony taken on their two year anniversary, AC/DC's you shook me all night long playing. That hadn't been his choice, Tony had gotten a hold of his phone and set that as his ringtone, the phone was still new and Steve hadn't figured out how to change it yet, not that he wanted too, the song had grown on him.
Steve cast his mother an apologetic look, to which she simply smiled and said "I'll leave you to it" before shutting his bedroom door, her soft steps sounding down the hallway to the living room of their small two bedroom apartment.
"Hey you" Steve said answering the phone, "Steve!" Tony sounded breathless and exhilarated, there was a ton of background noise, and he was barely able to hear Tony over it. There were people chattering loudly and music pumping was Tony at a party? It was a Friday night, but Steve liked to believe that Tony had been busy with work than partying.
"Where are you?" he asked loudly, frowning as the sound of Tony pushing past people echoed out the receiver, "at a common room party" Tony's breathless voice answered, Steve frowned deeper. "So this entire time I've been calling you, you've been at a party?"
There was a sudden silence; Tony must have left the party, "what's with the tone?" Tony asked, the sound of his shuffling steps sounded, must be walking back to his apartment, Tony didn't live far from the campus, barely a 15 minute walk.
"What tone? There's no tone" Steve denied, trying to hide the irritation he felt, "Steve, we've been together too long for you to try and lie to me, you're obviously pissed, why?"
"Why? Well maybe because we haven't seen one another in weeks, this is the first time I've heard your voice in three days without it being you saying 'the master of your universe' on your voice mail, I thought you were busy with school stuff, at least too busy to pick up your phone when I call, but turns out you're not picking up my calls because you're at a party!"
There was a nearly stunned silence on the other end, "okay wow, have a bit of pent up frustration there, I wasn't at this party all day you know, and I didn't answer the phone because it's been on silent, I've been in lectures since eight am this morning, and the only reason I was even near this party was because I was selling one of my textbooks from last year to someone and she lives on that floor, in fact I wasn't actually attending the party, I was passing through it. So I can't say I'm fond of the accusation you're making right now."
Steve sucked in a trembling breath, "what was I supposed to think Tony? You didn't answer my calls all day, and when you finally do you're at a party"
"Steve, if I had time to party, I would have time to get on a bus and come see you, why are you so angry?" Tony asked, genuinely confused at the sudden anger Steve was directing towards him.
Steve shifted, starting to pace the small expense of his bedroom, "I'm angry because I miss you, and it definitely doesn't sound like you're missing me, you're so caught up in everything over there, it's like you forget I'm here waiting for a simple thing like a returned phone call, or even a damn text message!"
There was a stunned silence as Tony took in his words, he took a deep breath and choked out "Why would you even say shit like that? You think that I don't miss you or think about you every day? This is important Steve; I can get out of here a year early and do something with myself."
Steve groaned and dropped heavily onto his bed, "I understand that, I do, but Tony, you're taking too much on and I can't understand why it's a struggle just to talk to you these days, it's barely two months into the semester and you feel like a stranger to me, we didn't have this problem when you were in Malibu, why can't you come up this weekend? Or let me come down there?"
"I told you Steve, I have a major paper due Monday and I haven't even started work on it yet,"
Steve sighed frustrated, "that, right there, sounds like an excuse. You're a genius Tony; you can probably finish that paper in just over an hour and then what?"
"And then I can call you and we can meet up" he said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world, "and I'm supposed to just sit here and wait for you to call?" He heard Tony groan over the phone, "You don't have to sit around waiting for me Steve, see what Bucky's up too, or go see a movie with Thor, they both attend NYU right?"
"I don't want to see Bucky or Thor, I want to see you, and it feels like you're putting everything else above us!"
"Okay you know what, I'm not looking to fight, so don't start one, I've had a long and exhausting day, I have two weeks' worth of laundry to do, and I have work at the café Sunday, so I'm sorry if it feels like I'm too busy for you, maybe I am, but that doesn't mean it affects me any less."
There was a moment of silence, Tony having stopped walking, "Steve, you mean everything to me, that's the honest truth, and sure I can admit that I haven't devoted the amount of time I should to you, but I told you that my life will be unbelievably hectic when they gave me the chance of fast tracking, I have three extra classes a week to make sure I get all my credits, I have to work, I have other responsibilities on top of that, what do you want me to do here?"
"I want you to consider not fast tracking, why do you even want to do that? What's wrong with graduating next year instead of this year?" He answered, clutching his phone tightly.
"So you want me to give up an opportunity to take over S.I faster, to get all these wonderful ideas in my head out into the world, because you can't handle periods of silence, which I told you would be a possibility?"
Steve moaned tiredly, "Tony, don't make me sound like the selfish one here, those ideas aren't going to disappear in a year or two years' time, you probably have them written down somewhere, why can't you just wait?"
"Okay so now I'm the selfish one for wanting to finish school earlier than I should be, for wanting to put myself out there and do things that I can be proud of?" Tony's voice had gone hard and cold.
"You're turning this around! This isn't about me not wanting you to do those things, this about wondering why I can't spend any time with my boyfriend, and me missing you so much it hurts! It kills me Tony, and that's what I can't deal with! Throw me a bone every now and then and let me know you're still aware of my existence!"
The silence was deafening, "I'm aware of it Steve," Tony responded softly, "I've been aware of it since seventh grade, I'm not forgetting about you, I never could. Think about how it feels to hear from someone you've felt for the way I've felt for you, for as long as I have. I will never forget you Steve, and if you think I am, maybe the problem is not with me and my work load, maybe it's you. I love you Steve, try to remember that the next time you don't hear from me for a few days."
A dial tone told Steve that Tony had hung up, Steve stood up, changing into his running clothes; he left his bedroom, a whole myriad of thoughts swirling in his head, body thrumming with emotion, equal parts apologetic and hurt, and angry, and lonely.
His mother gave him a concerned look from where she sat on the worn out couch as he stalked by on his way out of the apartment, "now we had a fight" Steve said, putting his shoes on, "I'm going for a run" he told her turning around and opening the front door, "be safe" she called after him, watching the door shut and listening to him walk speedily down the hall.
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A/N so yea, this shit just happened.