He sat alone in his room with his heart heavy and his spirit completely broken. He had never felt so empty in his life, emotionally spent and mentally weak. All he could think about as he held the wooden knight he gave to Rebekah all those centuries ago was the sight of her walking away from him, for the last time. Images of her as a frightened little girl alternated with his last image of her, causing the shattered pieces of his heart of shatter even further. He had promised to never leave her side that night. They were innocent children, living in a terrible time under the care of a terrible man. Those wide-eyed children who loved and protected each other never wanted this. They never wanted to become the people they were now, but there they were, so broken that they couldn't even recognize those pure hearts and untainted spirits they once had. When he said he would never leave her he meant it, he just didn't think the day would come when she didn't want him there.
He looked at the wooden knight filled with regret and sadness wishing they could go back to those days. It was too late for that though and he knew it. The only person he's ever really loved had just walked out of his life and it felt like he had been stabbed in the heart with a million knives. The sister he once knew had stood before him as a shell of her former self, ruined and unhappy, admitting that she may have wanted him dead. The brother she once knew stood before her as a mirror image of the man who had ruined them all. That's when he knew he had to let her go no matter how much he loved her. He didn't want to do it. Every inch of his being screamed at him to hold on to her because he truly couldn't bare to be without her, she was a part of him and to lose her was unfathomable, but he knew that what they had become, what they had done to each other, was so severe that there was no way they could continue on. He loved her too much to keep subjecting her to such destruction.
Rebekah had been right about it all. Right about him and who he had become and it pained him to finally admit it to himself. He had become a vicious and cruel monster, ruining everything in his path all because he was afraid of being alone and now here he was feeling like the earth was one endless mass of pain and torment that only he inhabited. His greatest fear had become a reality and it hurt so much that he thought about plunging that white oak stake into his own heart to ease it.
The only thing keeping him somewhat intact after losing half of his soul was his daughter. She was all he had left in this world; she was the only thing saving his life. Thinking of how Mikael ruined him and how he could one day ruin her gave him the courage to let Rebekah go. When he saw Rebekah's tears images of his daughter's tears flooded his mind, bringing him to the cold hard realization that the ruined unhappy girl could one day be his daughter or even worse she could be the vicious cruel monster that he was. All he could think of was his daughter wanting him dead because of what he had inflicted upon her and that hurt him more that any blow Mikael had ever wounded him with. He had to change, he had to heal because if he didn't that was his fate and his daughter's fate and he wouldn't be able to survive that.
A tear streamed down his face as he placed the wooden knight back into the box. Closing the box felt like he was closing his own casket. The finality of it all was setting in, every bone in his body felt like it was crumbling and every muscle ached.
He just stared at the lid of the box paralyzed by the pain sinking further and further into his depression.
Hayley watched him silently from the door, observing the broken and lost man before her, haunted by who he was and what he caused. She had decided to come after Rebekah visited her in the bayou to say goodbye. She was shocked to even see her alive after everything that had happened and was even more shocked when she told her that she was leaving. Rebekah was a sister and a friend to her, something she had never really had before. She was saddened by her departure but he knew that it was what Rebekah had always wanted. Before she left Rebekah had given her some advice about Klaus that she really didn't want to hear but she took her words to heart. She had always known that Klaus was broken; she could recognize it in anyone because she herself was broken, but his behavior had alienated her and if she was honest with herself she was starting to feel like he was every bit of the monster everyone said he was. Even with those feelings when Rebekah told her that he was broken but wanted more out of life she believed her. She knew that this baby could bring him peace because it had done the same for her.
After Rebekah left she tried to convince herself that she shouldn't care about Klaus and the wrecked state that he was probably in but she couldn't shake the sadness it made her feel. He was her daughter's father after all and his emotional state would have an impact on her daughter. She too was flooded with images of her child standing in the wake of her father's wreckage and it scared her half to death. She couldn't let that happen no matter what had transpired between Klaus and her in the past. That's what brought her to where she was now; back at the compound she was so happy to be free of. Maybe he was capable of building a life with their daughter in the aftermath of this storm? She wasn't 100 percent confident in that but she felt like she owed it to her daughter to find out.
She took a reluctant step forward and the floorboards creaking underneath her feet broke him out of his trance.
"I want to be left alone" he said without even looking up to see who it was.
"Klaus…it's me."
When he heard her voice he looked up to see if his ears were playing tricks on him. We he realized they weren't he quickly turned his head so that she wouldn't see the tears he still had welling up in his eyes. She was the last person he expected to see tonight.
"What are you doing here Hayley?"
"I know that Rebekah is gone," She said timidly.
He just sat silently with downcast eyes. Hearing say that felt like it was happening for the first time all over again.
"I know you let her go Klaus and…and…I guess I just wanted to say that I'm sorry, I know how much she meant to you."
"No one will ever know how much she meant to me," he whispered sadly.
Hayley dropped her eyes and stared at her hands that were now resting on the swell of her belly. Chilling silence filled the room as a stifling sadness surrounded them.
"If you don't mind I would prefer to be left alone Hayley."
"I know, but she said something to be before she left and it…she said that she believes that you may want more out of life than to be feared be everyone." she replied, taking a few apprehensive steps closer to him. "I just thought it might help to be closer to her."
"Closer to who? There isn't a soul in this world who can offer me any comfort right now."
Reaching down she picked up his hand, gently placing it where their daughter rested. "Her"
He looked at his hand on with pained eyes. A tear threatened to escape his eyes but he tried his best to hold it in. Hayley didn't say a word to him, leaving him alone with his thoughts. After a few moments he leaned closer to where his hand rest.
"I don't ever want to lose you like this," he whispered to his child, hoping that she could somehow hear him. Unable to hold the tears back any longer, he let them fall from his eyes and onto Hayley's swollen abdomen. He felt sorry for the child; sorry that she had to be born to a father who was capable inflicting utter destruction upon the ones he loved, sorry that she would never get to know a part of him because of his actions.
Hayley looked up at the ceiling as tears welled up in her eyes. She had never expected to see him so completely broken and she wasn't sure if she could handle seeing him in such a state. Niklaus Mikaelson, the smug egotistical hybrid had been reduced to an empty vessel of weakness and it was jarring. Suddenly she felt his head rest on her swollen abdomen. He had one hand still resting on her as he lay quietly and listened to their daughter's heartbeat, tears still streaming down his face. She looked down and cried as she was overcome with the emotional heaviness of it all. She cupped his cheek with one hand and placed the other on top of his head, gently stroking his face as if to assure him that it would be okay, that he would survive this and so would their daughter.
He closed his eyes and listened to the melodies of his daughter's heartbeat playing in his ears, inhaling deeply as he accepted the comfort of his child and her mother. He didn't know how he was supposed to make it through a future without Rebekah. He didn't even know how he would make it through the night knowing that she was gone, but at least he knew that he had a future. A future that he had the power to make better than his past, a future made possible because of this beating heart that echoed in his hears and at that moment the stinging in his chest hurt just a little less.
