TITLE: As It Is Only[1/6]
AUTHOR: Nymph Du Pave
FANDOM: Smallville
PAIRING: Lex Luthor/Clark Kent.
RATING: R
SUMMARY: CLexy. Something New. In the future but not too far. Still mainly in Smallville.
DISCLAIMER: The WB, DC Comics, MillarGoughInk, Tolin, Robbins, and Davola [along with whomever else] own this wonderfully cute show. I am merely borrowing the characters to use in my own evil ways and will try to return them as mentally cognizant and stable as when I took them [with the exception of the incredibly handsome and elegant Michael Rosenbaum of whom I might never let go ;)], but I can't make any promises. The Muse controls these fingers.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: First is first: I am working Neverland's ending [trust me when I say that if I hadn't changed it you all would have hated me as much as most people hated Thomas Harris for that Hannibal peice of shit] and then the last in the Trilogy. Got the plot, just working on the ending to one so that I can begin the next. [Big thanks to Diane! I'm not giving up and can't thank you enough for the in depth reviews!!]. Now, about the story at hand: This is stuff in a brand new style for me. It's already finished, btw, so it's not taking away from my time on Neverland. Not used to the style. I wrote the majority [little over 3,600 words] between the hours of 2:00 am and 4:45 am. This morning. Could not get to sleep, this has not been betad either so, please, bear with me here.
FEEDBACK: Please. I love it as it inspires me [Fernie, Diane, everyone else! Thank you guys!] to work my hardest. It's important in the world of fanfic to know that your writing reaches and touches people. Or that it sucks and could use some improvement.
AUTHOR'S EMAIL: nymph_du_pave@hotmail.com
As It Is Only
By Nymph Du Pave
As the dance music throbbed in the background, I struggled to remember what exactly it was that had first drawn me to Lana.
"It's actually very important," Lex half-shouted, taking a sip of his Ty-Nant. I looked away, towards the dark, towards the swinging colored lights and the wave of sultry teens. It was a habit I had long since grown accustomed to. There was something a little too intimate about Lex and his favored water bottles. Just something a little too intense and it always left me feeling uncomfortable with no real reason as to just why.
"Never leave this place," boomed the Talon's new sound-system. "The only place I need to be."
"Well," I muttered, still perplexed by his question. "It was just something."
"At sunrise."
"A feeling," I finished lamely.
Lex nodded as if he had been expecting just that answer. "Yes, but what kind of feeling, Clark? What kind?"
I sighed. What did it matter? And why, why, why did Lana have to decide once again to throw a test of our friendship my way? Another test dealing with truth.
A grind, a bump and Lex was stepping closer to get away from two kids very much into their dancing. My gut tightened and I blushed. Why my body reacted strangely towards his I'm sure I'll never know. Maybe something to do with his concentrated exposure to those nasty green rocks as a child.
I rolled my eyes, knowing the excuse could not be that simple.
Lex smiled a small, clandestine Lex-smile and tapped my chest with his free hand. "Was it the kind of feeling you get here? Or here?"
He tapped my crotch with the bottom of his water bottle and I swallowed. My throat felt warm and a lot smaller than it had been a minute ago.
"Both," I said, my strained throat producing little more than a whisper, but he nodded.
A hand settled itself on my shoulder and I instantly noticed the lack of depth in Lex's eyes. He was pulling away from me again, away from the owner of the hand and I could see the distaste in his body language.
It was Lana.
Chloe would have brought a smug smile and a look of interest. My parents or Pete would have conjured the respectful and proper side of Lex. Others would have brought out the surprising protectiveness. Only Lana forced out the disinterested side in Lex.
"She's bland, Clark," whispered the highly intoxicated Lex of three months ago. Four days after Chloe's Junebug 18th, two days after Lex had walked in on Lana and I losing control to our sexual urges and the first time I'd seen Lex ever truly drunk.
"Her secrets aren't new, they're tried and old."
"I still want to know them, Lex." My naïve little response.
"No, Clark. You don't. They'll bore. She'll bore."
"Hey guys."
I turned to look her in the eyes and her doll's face beauty brought back to mind the words from two nights ago. The words that led to her grabbing me.
"I want to date you, Clark. I want to be with you." Her voice had been soft, her eyes distant in the reflected moon light. "But I want you to put me first. I have to come first to someone. I have to be there, foremost."
I remember the confusion in my heart and soul. If she really was the one, then she would already be first. But she wasn't. My parents, Chloe, Pete and Lex were all higher concerns. Sexually and entertainment wise she was the first. But for friendship and intellectual foremosts, as far as who I would chose to be around...
"But Lana," I began. Wherever I had intended to go, well, it never reached the beginning of that dusty little road. Her hands tugged on the lose waistband of my work jeans, her lips crushing against mine. My gut tumbled, my crotch throbbed and my mind swelled. It was a perfect aim and her hands were roaming up my chest with perfect intent, hands gracefully outlining the carving that was my stomach, feeling my hard lines.
The same hand was on me now and my mind flashed forward past the deepening of the kiss, past the part where she pushed me into the wall and gasped her little gasp reminding me of the cheerleader inside when she felt the hard stab of my erection against the soft cushion of her stomach. My blood had soared. I could picture perfectly that round little mouth on me, her tongue licking, her lips closing-
That's when Lex had walked in on us. Or more accurately, the moment Lana's hand had started down my pants - two days after Chloe had announced her intent to leave for Metropolis, fifteen minutes after Lana had come to console me, two minutes after I had become completely aroused - Lex, with his old MP3 player walked in and looked up. He, wearing his boxing gear because I in all my teenage glory had forgotten out workout scheduled, was exposed to my flushed self and Lana's attempts to find my erection.
The tremendous guilt I had experienced at that moment had washed over me, coating me with its slimy residue. I still do not understand just why. To say things had been slightly awkward since would certainly be accurate if just a bit understated.
The music switched to Motorhead's Ace of Spades, Lex's contribution to the latest Talon Mix [=Talon= Vol. 42 - June, Year 4] and I took a deep breath.
Lana's jet black hair was pulled back into a bun at the top of her head, the deep cherry-red of the chopsticks glittered in the now bright white of the strobes. It depressed me for a moment. It was the perfect up-do to the perfect oriental dressing. Her burgundy dress and matching jewelry, shoes and wrap...
In the four years that the Talon had been open, Lana had become very successful. She was the first out of our highschool group that had moved out already, and she was the first to have a brand new car bought clear and free with cash.
I had gone with her to insure that her femininity was not intruded upon, a suggestion of my father's that I had completely agreed with. We both had been wrong however in our assessment of Lana's ability to judge a car's worth and the worth of the words coming from the salesman.
"Enjoying the party?"
I nodded, wondering. If we were a couple now would she be one to let me kiss her or touch her how I wanted? I doubted it very much. She was too in control of how she was percieved, something that I guessed grew from the fact that, as a child and young teen, everyone saw her for something she never wanted them to. Saw her weakest moment and thereby naming her as thus, the resulting product of a single moment in time when, truly she was stronger for that moment. Her life had become a mission statement, a drive to prove that she was something else. That her insecurity - the same insecurity that forced her to mold just how she looked through other people's eyes - didn't exist.
"Great music." She was like a movie star in that she sheltered her live from even those closest. I wasn't sure just how close she would let me get, just how much truth she would show me, even if I gave her everything of mine.
She grinned a perfect grin for the moment. "It should be," she said tipping her head to the side. All traces of the lisp I had once found so adorable was long gone, practiced away with the help of a very expensive, very good voice trainer. "You helped with the final editing."
Behind her Lex caught my eye and my concentration on Lana flickered for a moment. There was always something about him that caught my eye.
Lana, of course, was not blind to my distraction. Not through with being the center of my attention, she cleared her throat. When our eyes met, she looked satisfied and started talking about next month's compilation CD.
The moment her eyes flickered towards something else, I took advantage and quickly searched the room for Lex.
He was heading for the door. And watching me.