Author's Note: This is set pre-season 2. I've always wanted to write a Southland slash story just because their dynamic is so thick with tension & possibilities. (and so many things left unsaid between them...) My smutty mind worked overtime to think of a good story. I've been working on this one for a while, here & there. Finally I decided to do something with it. Please enjoy & please, please comment!

Chapter 1: Communication

They had been arguing all day. John was uncomfortable from the pain in his back and Ben was irritated that he refused to actually get treated for it. Damnit, Ben thought tossing his black duffle over his shoulder. Another day, wasted by either disagreeing over the smallest little things, or full out yelling at one another. Today had not been one of Ben's better days. He was rattled after not having John back him up when he tried to stop a moving vehicle. It just happened to be an elderly man, without his hearing aid that didn't stop when Ben flashed his police lights and rang the siren. So it was Ben's duty to stop the vehicle. Except, John stayed in the car. His back pain making him immobile. Absolutely useless.

Frustrated, Ben had yelled at John for assistance. He glared at him in return through those black tinted sunglasses. The vehicle he had stopped kept rolling away from Ben making it almost impossible for him to control the situation without John's help. It wasn't until Ben almost completely lost it, that John finally got out of the patrol car, slammed his baton into the side of the elderly man's window, shattering, making the car come to a complete stop.

"That's how you stop a car!" John shouted at Ben over the hood before storming back to this patrol car and sliding into the passenger side. Pain riddling his stoic features.

They spent the rest of the afternoon at the hospital with the elderly man and filling out paperwork the remaining half. At the hospital though, Ben felt guilty for taking his anger out on John. John couldn't stop the pain and it affected his personality badly. It made him non-responsive and bitter. So Ben tried talking to him, reason with him, instead John blew him off, again.

Now, Ben strode off to his motorcycle in the police lot. Night had fallen fast on the city. All he could think about was the drive home with the cool air whipping across his body and the hum of the bike between his legs. Anything to get his mind off of John.

He needed time away and to unwind before his next shift. John's behavior was becoming erratic and unpredictable with his back pain. Ben didn't know how to handle the situation anymore with his commanding officer. John called the shots, Ben was still the rookie. He wouldn't snitch on his command. No, he thought, he couldn't snitch. Snitching at this stage in his training would look bad on all accounts. He wouldn't be one of those police officers who got that reputation before he ever officially left the passenger seat.

As Ben walked out into the cool night air, the parking lot was empty of people, loaded with cars. Including an all too familiar black mustang parked besides his bike. Ben's steps stilled as his eyes locked onto the very man who tormented him all day and probably all night- only to wake up in the morning and do it all over again.

John leaned against the passenger side of his black mustang. He seemed more relaxed, maybe he had just taken something to ease his pain, Ben thought. He walked to his bike, not wanting to start a conversation that would just end up in another damn argument.

And he respected and liked John too much to let that happen for the millionth time today.

"Hey, kid." John said causally, yet his tone was aggressive. "You can't even look at me?"

Ben breathed out a sigh and turned to face John. He seemed like his old self tonight. Commanding, sharp, in control and most of all arrogant. Ben often thought of John like this. How John always dominated the situation, the conversation or the person. Ben had always admired that about him. Now, Ben felt the dominance radiate off him. His confidence high and his spirits better.

"What, John?" Ben asked bitterly, ignoring his instinct to hop on his bike and just take off. He would have given anything to just forget the crazy, mixed emotions he had in regards towards his partner.

John hesitated, sensing his bad mood. After riding together in a car all day for several weeks now, anyone could learn and read the person's mood besides them. "I wanna apologize for today."

"Right," Ben nodded tightly, "Whatever- it's over." He brushed it off as he began walking towards his bike. Unable to look at the John he knew and had to begun to care for so many weeks ago. It hurt him too much to see him in pain and not do anything. Now, he just wanted to forget today and prepare for tomorrow.

"I don't think so hot-shot." John grumbled, yanked Ben back to the side of his mustang and pinned him against the car and himself. John was much stronger physically then Ben, even slightly taller, giving him the dominate stance over him. Except Ben didn't let that deter him as he glared up with hard eyes at him. And John had a bad back. Ben didn't.

"What the fuck, John?" Ben demanded angrily, feeling an unusual stirring in the pit of his stomach. John smelled like fresh soap and pure male. It reminded him of the patrol car. He kind of liked the smell. Now he was close enough to lick it from John's skin.

"I wanna talk to you," John said, aggravated. "What you got some pussy at home, waitin' for you?"

"No, I don't." Ben shot back irritably.

John's face seemed relieved by that. Another weird sensation crept up the back of Ben's neck, making him shiver. He hadn't felt like this since high school when he asked his crush out. Now, staring at John, whose bright blue eyes bore into his now, made him wonder…

"All right- the least you can do is let me talk to you. Don't be such an ass." John released his hold and stepped back. Ben quickly shifted away, straightening his leather jacket and trying to shake away the weird flutter in his stomach.

"You're the ass," Ben muttered, refusing to let John off the hook so easily after the shit he pulled today on him. "You should've had my back out there, John. But you didn't."

"Aw- c'mon, some little old guy is hardly worth gettin' you're panties in a wad, Ben."

"That's not it," he spat back. The tension he had been holding onto all day suddenly came spilling out onto the pavement. "It shouldn't matter if it's an old guy or some crack head, John! You're my partner, damnit. I need to know that when I'm out there- I can count on you. Just like you need me. So don't tell me some bullshit that I could've handled that situation on my own. I needed you- and you weren't there."

John's hard face had been passive yet as he leaned heavily against the side of his car, he seemed deflated. He took a deep breath before finally meeting Ben's gaze, "I'm sorry. You're right. I should've been there. It won't happen again."

"Can you guarantee that, John?" Ben gestured with a nod towards John's stiff posture against the car.

John instantly straightened and stood tall, yet said nothing. Ben just nodded, knowing that trying to get this topic to settle between them would be like pulling teeth. He had to just let it go. For now.

Ben casually moved towards his bike a second time, pulling the straps of his helmet loose from the twist on the handle. He glanced over his shoulder to his allusive and unemotional partner. "Good night, John."

John nodded once and turned away, car keys in hand. Though much hadn't been resolved, Ben still felt better ending the night on a good note.

"Hey rookie," John said as Ben pulled out his own keys.

He turned to acknowledge him as he said, "sometimes the best way to communicate in our line of work is by smashing a window or two."

Ben raised a weary eyebrow.

"See yeah tomorrow, rookie…"

John was exhausted. He felt like shit and looked worse. He bent his mouth underneath the sink facet and drank down his painkillers. Thank God the shift was over, he thought swallowing his drugs. He could go home, lay down and sleep like a baby. Luckily he had tomorrow off so that he could zone out the rest of the day and just relax and rest. He wouldn't have to worry about how he might appear to Ben or the rest of the team. Though he was barely holding it together. He knew it and most of all, Ben knew it. He saw it yesterday. Except the kid didn't turn his ass in yet, which surprised John considering how this rookie seemed to play it by the book on everything else. So why didn't he just throw John's ass to the wolves? He'd be better off for sure.

He would have a training officer that didn't give him as much hell and shit as he did. He would have someone he could rely on. Someone who had his back at all times. Unlike John who could barely stand for more than an hour let alone chase or tackle a perp. He was dead weight to the kid. Still, Ben had kept his mouth shut. There had to be a reason, John though splashing water over his face.

Suddenly he heard the shower switch off in the distance. He glanced up from his hand towel to see Ben walk out from the steam of the shower, drenched from the hot shower. His skin glowed. His handsome features always made John envious and unfortunately attracted. When he first met Ben he thought he was just another pretty boy who wanted to impress daddy by becoming a cop. And he was and did. Except Ben also had serious money, with no real motive to join the police force other than to prove himself worthy of being a man. Sure he had daddy issues, but who didn't? This kid bore it and lived with it. And was turning out to be a damn good cop too. John respected that from his rookie.

Now seeing this young buck come strutting out of the shower as if he ruled the world with his finely carved abs, roped muscles and firm ass, made John's cock stir restlessly. Fuck, he thought burying his face in his towel, desperately trying not to stare. He would be more than happy to bury something else then his face into that ridiculous sexy younger man. He could've gone his whole life without seeing Ben so gloriously naked, he thought bitterly.

But damnit, he saw it. Now he couldn't get it out of his head. Why did he have to be such a pervy gay? He chastised himself bitterly, gripping the towel in his hand and shoving it into his duffle bag. Sometimes John still wished he denied that part of his sexuality. That he was still married and utterly hetero. Even if he faked being happy with it.

Alas, he didn't. He was undeniably, 100% gay as fuck. And damn, would he have given anything to see Ben, ass in air and ready to be senselessly fucked.

He hummed at the idea. Oh how he would do it, he thought, imaging every detail. Ben submitting to him. Ben gripping the edge of the bed. Ben on his hands and knees. Ben naked and cock as hard as a rock. Ben biting his lip in passionate need to be taken…

John felt his cock stiffen in his jeans. Damnit-shit-fuck-piss, he clenched his teeth, biting back his urge to walk into an empty stall and just relieve his current distress before leaving. But he wouldn't. No matter how tempting it may be. Suddenly he heard footsteps behind him. He glanced up in the mirror and saw Ben walking up from behind him, wearing only his towel which draped loosely around his waist.

"Hey," Ben nodded towards John. John didn't bother to turn or acknowledge his incredibly attractive, horrible sexy partner. Ben seemed unperturbed by this, "You got any body spray?"

John finally managed to pull his limited self control to raise an eyebrow at the rookie from the mirror. "What? Do I look like you're personal store?"

Ben rolled his eyes, "I know- I know. I just need some… I thought I could snag yours…"

"For what?" John turned on his heel then, ignoring the droplets of water cascading down his chest and over his dark pert nipples. "You got some hot pussy waitin' for you, rookie?"

"Jesus, John- I was just askin' for body spray." Ben shrugged helplessly and was about to leave when John grunted and pulled out his deodorant spray. A mild look of surprise from the rookie didn't pass by John as Ben caught the can and sprayed a few times before tossing it back. "Thanks," said Ben with a hint of a smile.

"Whatever," John replied pushing all his things in his duffle bag, hurrying the process so he could just go home and forget about the rippling muscles and hauntingly dark eyes that now glared at him.

"Got any plans tonight?" Ben asked casually, running a careless hand through his damp sandy blond hair.

"No."

"It's Friday night, John."

"So?"

"Fine," Ben commented, "Just tryin' to get to know you man."

"By asking me my Friday night plans?" John asked suspiciously.

Ben shrugged, "I thought you might be going out with some friends- other than the team."

To be honest, John did have plans. He was going to do the same thing he did every Friday night. Go to his gay bar near his house, find the prescription drug dealer that had the painkillers he wanted, drink himself silly, maybe fuck, go home and pass out. Sometimes that plan changed though. Depending on the drug dealer's mood, they would sometimes fuck like horny dogs in the bar bathroom. John would bend him over the sink and pound him senselessly until they both climaxed fervently after their rough sex. It was always rough with John. The nights he got a good screw where the nights he didn't have to drink himself into a stupor to fall asleep.

And tonight he wondered if he might have a difficult time dozing off with images of naked Ben ran through his mind. Maybe he'd get lucky and his drug dealer would be in the mood for some casual back room fucking.

"No- no plans, Ben." He replied trying not to sound so bitter about it.

Ben nodded slowly, his dark eyes surveying him. "K- well I see you later then."

John muttered a good night and picked up his duffle bag. He couldn't get out of the locker room fast enough. The minute he hit the parking lot and his car door shut and locked, his pressed the palm of his hand into his aching cock. He groaned painfully. The pressure between his legs had built from the moment he laid eyes on Ben to the moment he left. He had been uncomfortable standing right in front of him with a bonner. He felt like some high school teen with no control over his sex drive.

God- he needed to get his shit under control, he realized then. He stepped down hard the accelerator and sped off, heading straight for his bar.

TBC