Through a Child's Eyes
Summary: When you make your first kill as a ninja, you are sure to be in for a rough night. Especially for someone as young as Sasuke, who has no one but his sensei to comfort him when a mission goes wrong.
Characters: Kakashi Hatake, Sasuke Uchiha
Rating: T
Pairings: Parental KakaSasu
Story:
Crimson blood splashed over Sasuke's torn clothing, engulfing him in the sickening smell of death. His ears rang from the deafening scream that had just emitted from the now lifeless corpse his hand was lodged into. The chidori that was once sizzling in the palm of his hand faded away, leaving nothing but warm, sticky blood on his trembling fingertips.
He had just made his first kill.
Onyx eyes wide with realization, he quickly pulled his hand out of the enemy's chest. He had struck a vital organ, the heart. They had died before even registering pain. He looked at his hand, coated heavily in dripping blood, still warm with previous life.
I just… killed someone. I slaughtered them with my own hands.
He felt nauseous, and the room seemed to be spinning. A throbbing headache pounded against his skull. He clutched his head with his hand that hadn't been stained by blood.
I'm a murderer…
He took a swift glance at the lifeless body in front of him, a pool of crimson blood growing bigger and bigger the longer it lied there. Sasuke took in a shaky breath, and then looked up, seeing a tall, familiar figure standing over the corpse. The sight of the platinum haired ninja comforted him slightly. He let the tension in his shoulders relax as he whispered his name.
"Kakashi sensei…" He sounded broken; his words were heavy with guilt. Every inch of his body trembled with regret.
Kakashi's eyes slightly widened when he realized what his student had done. He never would've expected Sasuke to make his first kill so soon. He was only 13. The second he had saw the corpse; the sensei regretted leaving Sasuke to fight the leader while he took care of the henchmen. He knew Sasuke didn't have the mental capability to kill someone yet. The night would be a rough one, not only for his student, but for himself as well.
He remembered the first time he had killed an enemy. He was 15, and he woke up from nightmares three times that night. Even though he got over it quickly, he knew it wouldn't be as easy for Sasuke. Death was all too familiar to the Uchiha. Even though he had eyes older than his age, his heart seemed younger.
Kakashi could see the regret and guilt in his student's heavy gaze. Seeing the blood splattered around his arm, face, and chest frightened him a little. He hoped none of the blood was Sasuke's.
"Sasuke, come here." He whispered gently, trying to show him it was okay. The Uchiha took a few slow steps towards him, avoiding the corpse carefully. His naked feet splashed in the edge of the pool of blood. A few droplets flew up, coating his leg warmers with sticky red. He visibly flinched as he felt it run down passed the tape, to his exposed skin. He felt his feet step back onto the damp wood. He could hear the soft tap tap of his skin against the rotting floorboards.
He stopped in front of his sensei, avoiding eye contact. He glanced behind him without turning his head as much as possible. He could clearly trace the path he took to reach his sensei using his bloody footprints. He squeezed his eyes shut tightly, his eyelids shaking from the pressure.
I'm a murderer… The three words repeated in his mind again. He looked back into Kakashi's gaze.
"Sensei… are you mad?" He whispered softly. Kakashi's eyes widened as he heard his student's soft words. The Uchiha looked to the ground, shuffling his feet uncomfortably. His pride wouldn't allow him to look up at the platinum haired ninja at this point.
Kakashi gave a heavy sigh. "Look at me, Sasuke." He whispered. When he didn't, he gently lifted Sasuke's chin up with his index finger and thumb, forcing him to look into his two different colored eyes.
"I'm not mad. I would never be mad at you for this. You did what you had to do." He said, keeping his voice steady, to prove to Sasuke he was serious. Sasuke nodded slightly, his eyes brimming with guilty tears. Kakashi sighed again and pulled him into a hug.
"I know it's hard when you make your first kill. It is for everybody. Unfortunately, it does get better the more times you do it…" Sasuke nodded into his vest, tears started to soak through it. Kakashi pulled away gently, putting one hand on Sasuke's shoulder, he used the other to wipe away the tears streaming down his face.
Sasuke looked down again, looking at the bloody footprints on the ground that he had created. Kakashi reached into his faded green backpack and took out a rag and his water bottle. He poured the water onto the rag, and wrung it out. Then he carefully dabbed it on the blood splotches spread all over Sasuke's body. He sighed in relief, confirming that none of the blood belonged to his student. He put the supplies into his bag, and then looked into Sasuke's sorrowful eyes.
"Come on, Sasuke. The mission was a success. Let's head back to our shelter until tomorrow. I have a feeling tonight's gonna be a rough night for both of us." Kakashi scratched his head and chuckled softly as he put the scroll he was ordered to take into his pocket. He gently nudged the Uchiha's back. He looked at his sensei once more, and then obediently took shaky steps towards the exit. He took one more look at the human he had killed, before his sensei stepped in the way, blocking off the sight from his eyes. Kakashi stayed alert for possible ambushes on the way out the door, but no enemies came. Kakashi and Sasuke took this chance to flee the mansion.
Once exposed under the sky, Kakashi took a much needed breath of fresh air. He looked down at his student, and realized his steps were a little wobbly from lack of chakra. Sasuke noticed the 27 year old was staring at him and lowered his head, blocking Kakashi's view from his eyes. He knew if he looked into his eyes, he would be able to tell that he was about to cry.
We need to get back to the shelter… Kakashi thought, having just catching sight of Sasuke's eyes before he turned. He needs to rest.
It only took ten minutes for them to reach the small shelter. Sasuke had done okay walking at least. He didn't speak a word as Kakashi unlocked the door and stepped inside, keeping the door open for Sasuke before shutting it and locking it for the night. It was nothing more than a small, two-story cabin made entirely of wood. The bottom had a bathroom, living room, and kitchen, while the upstairs had two bedrooms and a bathroom.
"Go ahead and head upstairs and take a shower. It will get all of the blood off and it'll help you relax a bit. After that crawl into bed for the night; believe me, you'll want all the sleep you can get." Kakashi told his student, who nodded and, without a word, sauntered upstairs. He dug into his backpack for pajamas, and then went into the bathroom, locking the door behind him.
He slowly slipped off his shorts and boxers both at the same time, then pulled his shirt over his head. He checked himself in the mirror for injuries. When he confirmed that his wounds were only minor cuts and scratches on his body, he turned the shower on, slipping in slowly. He winced as the water touched his raw cuts.
He took a half an hour shower, lathering his body with extra soap to make sure all of the blood was off. When he finished, he flipped the handle off, then wrapped a towel around his body. He dried himself, slipping his pajamas on quickly. He unlocked the door, and then stepped out slowly. He was surprised to see his sensei standing at the door, waiting for him.
"Come on, Sasuke." He said, nodding his head towards the direction of Sasuke's room. He followed Kakashi without a word spoken back. He stopped in front of the bed, where Kakashi slowly pulled back the faded blue covers. The Uchiha hesitated for a second, before slipping under the sheets. Kakashi covered him back up, sliding the blanket up to the student's neck. Sasuke felt slightly uncomfortable with his sensei's strange actions. He normally didn't act so fatherly to him. He also realized Kakashi had carried his backpack home. He sighed as Kakashi sat down on the edge of the bed and patted his head.
"Try to get a good night sleep. I'll stay in here until you're asleep. When you do, I'll go back into my room. If you need me for anything, I'll be in my bed." Kakashi told his student. Sasuke let his curiosity finally get the best of him.
"Why are you so concerned about me?" He asked. He immediately realized his voice was softer than it normally was… too soft. The mental grimaced, and the first thought that came to mind was 'My voice is too soft for an Uchiha voice.'
Kakashi's visible eye curled upwards into a smile. "Well, Sasuke. Let's just leave it at tonight is going to be a rough one. You don't think so now, but trust me, you'll know what I mean in a few hours." Sasuke still didn't understand, but sighed and closed his eyes, waiting for sleep to take him. He was honestly exhausted from the fight. He heard the floorboards slightly creek as Kakashi walked to the other end of the room, turning off the light. The room was illuminated by nothing but the small night light next to Sasuke's bed. He came back by his student and he leaned up against the wall, taking out his Make Out Paradise book. He flipped through the flimsy pages until he found the marked corner, and then began reading. He glanced up from the book momentarily to look at his student.
"Goodnight, Sasuke." He whispered softly. Sasuke's eyes opened halfway to look up at his sensei. He was a little shocked by Kakashi's words. Was the dog loving, platinum haired ninja opening up to him?
"Yea… Goodnight." He spoke back to the Sharingan user calmly, closing his eyes again. Kakashi's last words to him threw his mind into many thoughts. All the thoughts, however, drifted back to his kill in the previous hours.
I'm a murderer… He thought. He felt his body tense slightly as the thought came back to him. He curled his body up tighter into a ball. He had both of his arms wrapped around his knees, while he buried his head in between them and his chest. He squeezed his eyelids tighter a little.
He gasped suddenly, his body jolting in surprise. His eyes snapped open as he felt a hand rest gently on the side of his head that was facing upwards.
"It's only me." Kakashi said reassuringly. "Are you okay? You're tensing up."
Sasuke nodded shakily, pulling the blankets closer to his head. He buried his face in it, closing his eyes tight again. "Sorry…" He whispered.
Kakashi's gaze softened. "Is it about today?" When Sasuke nodded, he pulled the boy into a hug.
"I'm sorry. You should never had killed someone so early in your life. You're still so young. Do you want to sleep with me tonight?" He asked the boy, who had begun shaking after Kakashi began talking about the event. Sasuke lied unmoving for awhile before nodding slightly. Kakashi smiled at him underneath the mask, before gently nudging his student. Sasuke sat up slowly, sucking in a deep breath before standing up. Kakashi put an arm around his shaking body and gently guided him to his bed.
Sasuke watched as Kakashi put a hand on his shoulder- a silent order to stay put. Then he walked over to the messy bed. He chucked a couple of clothing items off, setting a couple 'Make Out Paradise' books on the nightstand on his side of the bed. He situated the messed up sheets and comforter. He pulled back the covers and patted the bed softly, signaling for Sasuke to get in. Sasuke nodded shakily, before silently sauntering to the giant kind sized bed. He crawled under the faded blue comforter, snuggling into the warm sheets.
"You've got everything you need?" The one eyed Sharingan user asked. Sasuke nodded slowly, too tired to respond. Kakashi noticed this and laughed softly.
"Nice to know you like my bed." He joked, crawling in on the other side. He covered his student up with the sheets and comforter, and then covered himself up as well.
"Well… Goodnight Sasuke." He whispered quietly, groping for the light on his nightstand. When he found it, he flicked the light off. The dimly lighted room quickly faded into darkness, leaving only the pale sliver of moonlight glowing over Sasuke's small form. He gazed at the moon for a few silent seconds, before he closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep.
Just as Kakashi had said, Sasuke awoke just a few short hours later, screaming in cold sweat "I'm a murderer!"
Kakashi was at his side in an instant, leaning over the bedside so it was easier to talk to his student instead of in the bed together. He held Sasuke close and shushed him as he screamed. The images in his dreams rushed back to him, and he cried out again, pulling his legs to his chest and letting out a strangled gasp. Kakashi held him close to his chest while whispering "You're not a murderer, you're not a murderer…" He repeated over and over. He knew exactly how to handle the situation; not only did he go through it once; he's dealt with the situation before with others, although not quite so young.
"Sensei I can't take it!" He screamed. "The dead body… it's like… my parents!" He screamed. Kakashi suddenly felt sympathetic. He had forgotten that Sasuke had witnessed his parents get killed by his older brother. Before he could say anything, Sasuke suddenly screamed out something he didn't expect to hear.
"I KILLED MY PARENTS! I'M A MURDERER!" He yelled out. Kakashi gasped and hugged him even tighter. He could feel Sasuke's body racking in sobs, and his hot breath against his cheek as he panted heavily from fear.
"Shh... Shh… You're not a murderer, Sasuke. You didn't kill your parents." He whispered softly. "You're not a murderer."
Sasuke continued crying for another hour and a half, occasionally whispering "I'm a murder… I'm a murderer…" and every time he'd whisper it, Kakashi would immediately murmur back "You're not a murderer… You're not a murderer…"
The hour and a half passed by extremely slowly, until Sasuke had finally cried himself to sleep. Though it seemed uncharacteristic for Sasuke to do such a thing, Kakashi expected nothing less from the young Uchiha boy. He carefully placed the palm of his hand on the side of Sasuke's face, wiping his tear stained cheeks with his thumb.
"I'm sorry I put you through this…" He whispered softly. He stroked his student's face a couple more times, before carefully removing his hand. When Sasuke didn't wake, he walked back to his side of the bed. He climbed in very cautiously, placing his heavy head on the pillow. He thanked the heavens that he was only sleeping lightly tonight at all, then closed his eyes. It took him awhile to fall asleep.
Unfortunately, Sasuke was up and screaming again a mere half an hour after he had just gotten to sleep.
"I'm a murderer!" He had screamed again. Kakashi immediately turned over and pulled Sasuke close to his body again, this time still under the sheets. The boy bit his lip until it bled to keep himself from screaming. His body was racking with sobs, and he was hyperventilating badly.
"Make… Make it go away…" He whispered. "I don't want… to see… the dead body… I don't want… to hear… the screams… Please…" He whimpered slightly. "Please… Make it go away…"
Kakashi held him tighter, stroking his cheeks softly. "I can't do that Sasuke… I'm sorry." He whispered. "This night is hardest. Tomorrow, you'll feel better about it and it won't be as bad. I promise." Kakashi whispered. He glanced at the clock and let out a deep sigh.
"It's three a.m. Morning should come pretty quickly for us." He whispered. Sasuke couldn't hold the sobs in any longer. Kakashi continued holding him close. "You're not a murderer, Sasuke. I swear on my life."
Sasuke cried another three hours after that. It was now six a.m., and the sun was beginning to rise in the sky. Sasuke had once again cried himself to sleep, clinging desperately to Kakashi like a child. Kakashi accepted the fact Sasuke wasn't going to let go, and fell asleep with the teen clutching to him for life.
Sasuke managed to get a good couple of hours of sleep before waking up again. He woke up the same way he had done the last two times- screaming "I'm a murderer!" Kakashi pulled him to his chest tighter, since they were already snuggled in to each other. He brushed the bangs out of Sasuke's face, wiping away some of the sweat pouring down the Uchiha's face.
"Shh… You're not a murderer." Even though he had repeated the same thing over and over, he knew the phrase was powerful. To Sasuke's mind, this was the most reassuring sentence it could register. The silver haired ninja noticed the boy was reacting a lot worse than before. He was trembling so bad Kakashi was having a hard time holding onto him. While Kakashi caressed his cheek, he laid his fingertips on top of Sasuke's shaking fists, clenched so tightly sweat clung to them. He could hear small whimpers coming from the Uchiha.
"You're not a murderer…" He whispered to him. He felt Sasuke's whole body jump as he sobbed.
"Yes I am, Sensei… I killed someone… They looked like my parents… I'm a killer!" He screamed, though it was muffled into his sensei's chest. Kakashi rubbed his back.
"Would a murderer by this shaken after killing someone?" He asked his student calmly. Sasuke stiffened, not answering the question.
"Sasuke?" He muffled a reply into the Jonin's chest, too soft to understood.
"I can't hear you, Sasuke." He would be more confident in his answer if he said it, not just thought it.
The Uchiha got an uncomfortable look plastered onto his face. "No…" He whispered after awhile.
Kakashi nodded. "You're not a murderer, Sasuke. Far from it." He pulled him closer to his chest, feeling him clutch the fabric of his vest tightly. He placed his hand back on top of his student's. He could feel warm tears beginning to soak through his clothing again, but he didn't mind.
They laid there without exchanging a word for an hour, before Sasuke began to hyperventilate. Kakashi lifted his head and opened his eyes to look at his student.
"Sasuke, are you alright?" He asked him.
Sasuke bit his lip, drawing more blood. "…Flashback…" He whispered. "Parents… bodies… yesterday… look alike…" He managed to breathe out through the panting.
"I'm sorry, Sasuke. I know you want me to help you, but I can't. All I can say is that who you killed wasn't one of your parents, and you didn't kill your parents, Itachi did." Sasuke visibly flinched when his sensei mentioned his older brother's name.
"Kakashi sensei… how will I be able to… kill him?" He whimpered. "Knowing… this will happen?"
Kakashi sighed. He honestly wasn't in favor of Sasuke's goal of avenging his family's death, but he had to comfort the boy. "Like I said, Sasuke. Unfortunately, it gets easier the more times you do it…" He whispered back. It seemed to help settle the boy down a little. His hyperventilating slowed down a bit, allowing Kakashi to hold him close again.
"Do you think you can go back to sleep?" He asked. Sasuke shook his head.
"No more nightmares… please… no more nightmares…" He whimpered.
Kakashi nodded, understanding Sasuke's fear. He personally didn't want Sasuke to get anymore nightmares.
"Shh… Shh… alright, alright. Let's get up now then. Remember, once we get home we have to report to the Hokage. I think it'd be best if you stayed with me tonight again." He whispered.
Sasuke nodded into his shirt, his body trembling. "Thank you... sensei…" He murmured.
Kakashi smiled behind his mask. "No problem, Sasuke. I'm here to help you." He rubbed Sasuke's cheek momentarily, before unzipping Sasuke's backpack, taking out his clothes.
"Here you go, they're washed and cleaned up. Go ahead and get dressed and ready, we'll leave in an hour." Sasuke nodded, and Kakashi slowly slipped out the door, shutting the door behind him. Sasuke slowly slipped out of his pajamas, putting on his normal clothes and walking outside of his sensei's room. He went into the bathroom and got ready for the day. He still felt shaky about what had happened the night before. When he opened the door to walk out of the bathroom, he saw Kakashi standing there, waiting for him.
"Are you ready?" He asked. Sasuke looked to the ground and waited a couple of seconds before nodding.
Kakashi realized what was bothering Sasuke and sighed. "Look, Sasuke. I know you're upset about last night, which is why you're staying with me tonight. It's going to get better, okay? Don't think that this is how it's going to be every time you kill someone." Sasuke nodded softly. "I know, Kakashi sensei."
Kakashi walked back into his room and carried the two backpacks out. He handed Sasuke his and carried his own. He locked the door to the shelter, and began walking back to the village. Sasuke didn't speak the whole time, his mind still muddled in the thoughts of the dead corpse. Kakashi noticed this, but didn't say anything. If Sasuke needed to talk, he would speak to him at the house.
It took an hour and a half before they finally reached the village. They walked straight to the Hokage's tower, knocking before they entered the door.
Kakashi briefly described the details of the mission, before being cut off by Tsunade.
"Are you alright, Sasuke? You look lost in thought." She told him. Sasuke looked up at her slowly, not wanting to make eye contact with the Hokage. Kakashi knew Sasuke wanted his privacy about the kill, so he figured he'd tell Tsunade when Sasuke wasn't there.
"He's alright, just a little tired from the mission. He's staying at my house tonight to make sure he makes a full recovery." Kakashi laughed. "As I was saying, while I took care of the henchmen, Sasuke took on the leader. He ended up killing the leader on his own." He tried to emphasize the last sentence as much as possible without Sasuke noticing. Tsunade nodded and looked at Sasuke.
"Good job, Sasuke." She said. When Sasuke looked to the ground without answering her, she looked back to Kakashi and mouthed. 'Is that why he's acting this way?' When Kakashi nodded back to her, she carried on as if nothing had been said so Sasuke wouldn't get suspicious.
"Alright, mission accomplished. Good job, you two. Go ahead and rest for the night. You have no missions today or tomorrow at all." Kakashi nodded.
"Thank you, Lady Tsunade." He said. He turned to his student. "Ready, Sasuke?" He asked. Sasuke looked up at him and nodded with tired, lost eyes. Kakashi put a hand on his back and guided him outside.
"You've got an extra pair of clean clothes in your backpack right? Let's go straight to my house then." Sasuke nodded and followed Kakashi down the road. Kakashi unlocked the door and allowed Sasuke to step inside.
"You've been here before so you know where everything is. Let me make you something to eat. Go ahead and lie down on the couch and turn on the tv if you want." Sasuke nodded. He lied his head down on a couch pillow and watched Kakashi saunter into the kitchen. He sighed and grabbed the remote, flipping the tv on.
To his fuzzy mind, the screen was nothing but a blur of flashing bright colors. He closed his eyes, his tiredness taking over him. He didn't want to sleep knowing the nightmares wouldn't stop, but his body was demanding it. Sasuke situated his body more, taking one last look at 'Family Feud' before drifting off to sleep.
Kakashi came back to the living room five minutes later, holding a bowl of tomato soup and saltine crackers on the side. When Sasuke didn't move, he slowly walked up to the Uchiha and bent down to look at his face. When he saw Sasuke's eyes had closed, he realized the teen had fallen asleep. He sighed and set the bowl carefully on the wooden table in front of the couch. He walked to the nearest hall closet and pulled out the softest blanket he could find. When he came back, he gently draped it over Sasuke's body and sat down on the couch by his feet, careful not to wake the boy too early. He was going to wait until he started getting agitated from nightmares before he'd wake him up. He sighed and looked at the tv, wondering what Sasuke had been watching.
'Family Feud, huh?' He thought to himself, chuckling a little. 'I'd never expect you to watch this show…' He smiled and turned back to the tv.
Ten minutes later, he heard Sasuke let out a small whimper. Kakashi rubbed his student's back, before slowly shaking him awake. He moaned slightly, before slowly opening his eyes. Kakashi smiled at him.
"Sleep good?" He asked. Sasuke nodded, sucking in a breath. "Go ahead and have some soup. I'm sure you're hungry."
He sat up slowly and Kakashi gave him the bowl. Sasuke continued watching the screen as he ate slowly. When he finished, he set the bowl back down and lied down again.
"Thanks, sensei…" He whispered. Kakashi smiled and nodded. "You know, if you're tired, I have a bed…" He told him. Sasuke shook his head slowly. "I want to stay… next to you…" He whispered back to his sensei. He snuggled into the warm blanket and drifted back off to sleep before Kakashi could even respond.
The platinum haired sensei smiled softly. 'Well well well… seems like you're finally starting to warm up to me, Sasuke.' He thought, patting his student on the back softly. After confirming that Sasuke would be asleep for awhile, he turned back to watch Family Feud. He noted how foolish the Hoshi family was for guessing that foxes were the most commonly summoned fighting partners for ninja during combat.
When commercials came on, Kakashi took the half eaten tomato soup bowl the sink and washed it out. He put the spoon and the bowl in the dish washer, and poured a glass of warm tea for himself. He sat back down on the couch and sipped it slowly. The sweet aroma calmed his mind and nerves from all the stress. He looked back at the tv, watching the last ten minutes of the show.
When it had finished, he flipped through the channels until he found something else. He wasn't sure what the show was called. It was something about crime scene investigations. He watched it for another twenty minutes, sipping his tea and occasionally glancing over towards Sasuke's direction to make sure he was still sleeping.
It was well into the afternoon before Sasuke woke up again. Kakashi was very surprised he hadn't gotten any nightmares, but he was happy about it nonetheless. Sasuke needed the sleep, even though he wasn't physically exhausted. The lack of sleep from the night before, and the mental state he was enough to let his body rest for the day. He glanced up at Kakashi, who smiled at him.
"Waking up, huh? How are you feeling?" He asked him, patting his head gently. Sasuke closed his eyes and sighed.
"Tired…" He admitted, looking back at the tv screen. "What are you watching?" He asked, looking at the animated scene of a girl holding her breath as she crossed over a red bridge, gripping someone's arm tightly.
"Spirited Away." He said tonelessly. "It was one of my favorite childhood movies." Sasuke smiled slightly and nodded. "Yea… me too." He watched the screen for awhile, his eyes continuing to droop lower and lower as his tiredness grew. Kakashi noticed this and positioned the blanket around Sasuke's body.
"Go to sleep, Sasuke." He smiled. The Uchiha nodded, his mind already screaming for sleep. He closed his eyes, and fell asleep seconds later. Kakashi smiled, and turned back to the tv.
It was about seven thirty when Kakashi heard a knock on his door. He sighed and got up, walking over and opening it. He was greeted by his two other students.
"Hey sensei, is Sasuke here?" Sakura asked him, looking at him with worried eyes. "We heard he was staying with you tonight because he's hurt." Naruto nodded in agreement to her statement. Kakashi sighed.
"Yea, he's here." He told them. "But he's not hurt." Naruto and Sakura looked confused.
"What? But Tsunade told us…" Kakashi cut Naruto off when he bent down to their eye level.
"Do you promise you will not tell him I told you this? You can't tell anybody of this either. Nobody can know about it. This cannot be spoken of again, alright?"
They both nodded.
"Good." Kakashi sighed. He leaned in to whisper into their ears. "He made his first kill." He told them.
Sakura gasped and covered her mouth, while Naruto just screamed "WHAT?" while his eyes went wide.
"Shh." Kakashi silenced him. "He's sleeping. You'll wake him up."
"He's sleeping?" Sakura looked surprised. "But it's only 7:30! How could he already be asleep?"
Kakashi sighed. "He had a very rough night last night. You guys have heard in the academy what happens to a ninja when they make their first kill." Naruto and Sakura nodded. "He was up all night screaming 'I'm a murderer' and crying. Actually, every time he fell back asleep, he had done it crying." Kakashi continued.
"Basically, he cried himself to sleep." Naruto stated. Kakashi nodded. "Correct. It would take him hours to fall back asleep once he woke up too. Normally, it wouldn't have been so bad for him, but because of the tragedy of his family, it brought back some painful memories for him." Sakura and Naruto nodded, understanding the situation.
"He's basically just sleeping the day away right now. Tonight is going to be another rough one for him, but he should be okay afterwards." He stepped aside so his students could see. Naruto and Sakura poked their heads in and saw Sasuke asleep on the couch.
"Aww… he's so cute." Sakura giggled. Naruto looked back up at Kakashi.
"He really is tired. I've never seen him look so worn out." He said. Kakashi nodded.
"Exactly. So you guys cannot bring this up to him at all. "Naruto and Sakura both looked at him with understanding eyes. "We won't." Naruto reassured his sensei.
Kakashi nodded. "We were just watching Spirited Away. Do you want to come in and watch the movie? If Sasuke wakes up, he might like the company." He asked.
Sakura shook her head. "Sorry, but I've gotta be home by eight, otherwise I would." He nodded and looked at Naruto. "I've got to go meet up with Iruka at Ichiraku at eight." He grinned sheepishly.
Kakashi waved at them. "Alright then, I'll see you guys later." He said, watching them walk away.
He sighed and walked over to the Uchiha, carefully scooping him up in his arms. "Let's get you to bed." He chuckled quietly. He carried him to his bed and pulled the covers back. He gently set him down on the mattress, covering him back up with the blankets. He walked downstairs and turned off the tv and the lights.
He got in bed next to Sasuke, turning on a small nightlight. He read in the dark for a few hours, before setting his book down and going to bed for the night.
When Sasuke woke up the next morning, he was met by Kakashi's whimsical smile.
"Well hello Sasuke. Have a good sleep?" He asked. "You had a better night than I expected. You only woke up twice! It took you about an hour to fall asleep for each too." He patted Sasuke's head, still smiling.
His eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "I don't remember anything. I last remember watching Spirited Away on the couch." He said, his voice back to the normal deep tone that he hadn't been able to let himself use from his fright in the last couple of days.
Kakashi just laughed. "Well, you certainly seem a lot better today." He ruffled the messy black hair. "I think you're gonna be okay now." He smiled. "GO ahead and get dressed. I'll go make some breakfast." He walked out of the room and shut the door, giving Sasuke some privacy while he dug through his backpack and found his clothes.
He slowly undressed and redressed into the new fabric. The coolness felt good on his skin. He looked in the mirror Kakashi had in his room, noting how messy he looked overall. He sighed, realizing Kakashi was the only one who had ever seen him this unready.
He found the brush in his backpack and combed his hair a little, making sure it at least looked decent before he tucked it away again. When he opened the door and walked into the kitchen, he was met by Kakashi, who pulled out a chair for Sasuke to sit in. In front of it was a plate with two pieces of buttered toast and a few pieces of bacon.
"Go ahead and eat up." He smiled.
Sasuke left three hours after he had finished eating breakfast. He thanked Kakashi for helping him through the nights. Kakashi just smiled.
"No problem, Sasuke. Remember, anytime you need me, I'll be here for you." It took Sasuke a few seconds to fully register that, before he nodded.
"Thanks sensei… goodbye." He whispered as he turned and walked towards his house.
Kakashi waved to him as he got more and more distant from the house. Kakashi lowered his arm and watched Sasuke until he was out of sight.
'It's hard for a ninja to make their first kill, but it's especially hard when it's merely a child doing it. Sasuke, you may not realize it, but you are yet a child. And through a child's eyes, killing is wrong. You'll understand it the day you fulfill your dream of avenging your brother…' He closed his eyes and shut the door.
~End.
Sorry about the terrible ending. Anyways, I tried really hard to make this descriptive, especially in the beginning. PLEASE review and tell me what you thought of the story. To improve my writing, I'd like to know what I do well and what I can improve on. Yea, yea, I know I have to work on better endings…. ^_^;
Anyways, thanks for reading my story!
~SasukeUchihasGuardian
