Title: A Phone Call Away
Author: Shaneequa
Rating: T
Disclaimer: I don't own anything.
Summary: A twist to FWFS, molded with the HBX challenge of June 2009.
Author's Note: Plese be gentle, this is my first shot at a JAG fanfic. Thanks a bunchios to my beta A'serene for making the story readable :P (: Comments and criticisms always welcomed. (Oh and Amber, here's proof that I'm still living and breathing. Lol.)
"I'm only a phone call away"
Mac, Yeah Baby
Mac walked out of the elevator, still debating with herself whether or not she should've come. She was sure to see him later, at the airport. They could say goodbye to each other then along with everyone else. It would seem less simple that way, a goodbye to a colleague that she had spent nine years working with, eight years loving. Though waiting until that send off to say goodbye was much simpler, Mac knew that it would leave too many things unsaid.
She deserved better than a simple goodbye after everything, they deserved better than that.
"Suck it up, Marine," she told herself walking up to his open door.
His apartment was no different from hers. Boxes full of the past nine years all packed up nicely in bubble wrapped ready to be shipped to the next destination, wherever that may be.
"Hey," Harm greeted her, sensing her presence in the room. It was just something that they could always do; sense when the other is in the room. Just because in twelve hours thirty minutes and nine seconds, they wouldn't be able to apply that certain talent anymore, doesn't mean that he in particular can't use it now.
"Hey yourself," Mac replied leaning on the doorway at first then walking in his apartment still surveying the surroundings. It somehow seemed smaller this way, ironic how that was. To her left, she saw his suitcase, not the bag that he usually took with him to TAD assignments but a bigger one, it was all packed up and ready to go.
It was really happening. They were really moving on with their lives, separately. Before she could think about it, the words slipped out of her mouth; "There's just something so final about a packed suitcase."
"Yeah," Harm agreed as he placed yet another box of his belongings all taped up and ready to go, "not to mention an entirely packed apartment. How 'bout you, you packed?"
Mac shyly shrugged and admitted, "Not completely."
Harm brushed past her to pack up some more of his things. Nine years of memories, all boxed up and ready to go. He might as well have packed his heart in one of the boxes as well and offered it to her. At least that's what it felt like at the moment.
He heard her sigh and instantly knew what was coming next, and he wasn't disappointed.
"Let's talk about you and me," Mac suggested. Wasn't that the reason she came by tonight anyway? Because she wanted closure, she needed it before they would be split apart to the other ends of the world?
"Neither one of us –"
"— wants to be the first to say goodbye. Yeah I know the song, we've been singing it for years."
'And for good reason,' he thought to himself with a sigh. Saying goodbye, moving on from them – whatever they may be, was hard. For a long time, Mac had made up what became everything to him.
He turned needing to meet her eyes so that she could see that he meant it. "I don't think that I will ever feel about anyone else the way I feel about you."
He met her eyes, it was the truth and seeing that raw emotion in him made her want to just bolt right out the door and brush this whole thing off. She steeled herself not to do it, she was a Marine, and Marines never backed down, though the woman in her wanted to so much.
She smiled and approached the issue the only way she knew how.
"That's very flattering," Mac replied with a shy smile. It was as if this was his Sydney Harbor where he would lay his emotions out on the line just for her to shove it right back to him. She had decided long ago that things would never work out between the two of them. It was just too complicated, and she wasn't gonna back down from that theory now. "One piece of advice, don't share that with your wife, whoever she may be, she might not understand."
Harm rolled his eyes, in typical fashion, they had dodged another opportunity. This time it was Mac's turn to deflect, but he wasn't going to end the night until he got the truth, until she had no doubt what he felt for her. "Do you understand?"
He set the finished box along with the rest of the boxes ready to be shipped to London and stood up with her, face to face. There was no turning back now.
"I want to," she whispered, afraid that if she spoke any louder than a whisper, the bubble that she was trapped in would burst.
Without a second though, Harm did what he had wanted to do for so long. He leant in and kissed her, his hands immediately being strategically placed on her hair massaging her scalp as their kiss depend to something other than a goodbye.
"I love you," he whispered as they broke apart panting and needing oxygen as much as each other.
"Show me," she replied not waiting for him to react to her offer as she captured his lips with hers.
In the blink of an eye, the main door was shut closed and they had made their way to his bedroom, surrounded in boxes. If Harm had a moment to think, he would've thanked the movers for leaving his bed while the rest of his furniture had been shipped to storage for him to take later. All thoughts of sleeping on an airbed and how uncomfortable that would've been for him wasn't in his mind at all.
His focus was on Mac; the beautiful goddess that after nine years, he could finally say was his, even just for that moment.
He slipped in to her, keeping her gaze. Everything in the past nine years didn't seem to matter anymore. It was all there, in her eyes and his, the love and connection that would be untouchable to anyone else.
"I love you, Mac," Harm whispered before burying his face in the crook of her neck, spooned behind her.
"I love you too, Harm," Mac replied as she closed her eyes and let sleep take her where reality couldn't.
Mac awoke the next morning to the sound of Harm's singing. Her internal clock read 0715, local. She and Harm were needed at the airport in four hours, and there was just so much more to do!
"Morning, Mac," Harm greeted her as she walked to the kitchen where he handed her a bagel and cream cheese. She looked at him trying to gauge his reaction to last night events, but he was neither in a perky mood or a sad one.
"Harm, about last night –" Mac started knowing that if she didn't approach the subject he was never going to. She couldn't afford to brush the whole thing without at least talking about it beforehand. Last night, she had the sole intention of getting closure and sleeping together defiantly wasn't the kind of closure that she was looking for.
Harm looked at her meeting her eye, trying to see how she felt about the whole ordeal. He was happy, as long as she was but last night may have just been a goodbye to her and he wasn't about to make it harder for her.
"It's okay, Mac. I understand, last night was just goodbye," he sighed covering up the hurt that he felt when she didn't correct him. "We tried didn't we?"
Mac held back a sob, that was it wasn't it? After nine years of dancing around each other, they would end in these terms. After one night together that 'at least they tried.'
"Yeah," Mac said forcing a smile on her face that came out more as a grimace. "I'll see you later at the airport?
"Yup," Harm said watching as she walked out his door for what would be the last time.
As soon as the door shut, he gathered his things and showered and changed into his civvies. Harriet and Bud had insisted on seeing them off at the airport with AJ, Jimmy and the twins. The family had been such a big part of his life that neither he nor Mac could refuse their request to say goodbye to them one last time.
He would miss Bud, Harriet and their family almost as much as he would miss his Marine.
Before he knew it, he was standing at the terminal of the airport saying goodbye. Bud and his family were only allowed so far to the gate. Harm was carrying AJ in his arms as Mac hugged Harriet and promised to stay in touch. She bid the kids goodbye then looked at Harm who had set AJ free to send his godmother to San Diego.
"Promise to visit me there?" Mac asked Harriet with hopeful eyes as she hugged the godson whose birth was supposed to change her life.
"We promise, Ma'am," Bud stepped in a replied. "We wouldn't miss going to Disneyland!"
"We wouldn't miss seeing London either, Com—Captain," Harriet replied with a smile at Harm who had hugged her as a goodbye.
"It's not too late to take me up on the offer, Bud," Harm reminded Bud of the position that awaited him in London.
"I'm sorry sir," Bud declined once again pulling his family close as Mac finished saying goodbye to the kids. "This is where we belong."
"Can't say I didn't try," Harm chuckled patting Bud on the back.
"We really need to get going," Mac said looking at Harm then at Harriet and Bud with a sad smile. "I'm really going to miss you guys."
"We'll miss you too Aunty Mac," AJ replied hugging her godmother one last time before the two checked in the gates.
Since they were going to two different parts of the world, it was only logical that the gates they would board in were in two opposite parts of the airport.
They stood in the middle of the crowd letting time and people pass them by.
"So, I guess this is it?" Mac asked him that solemn smile still on her face.
"I guess it is," Harm replied pulling her in his arms for one long hug. "I'm gonna miss you, Mac."
"I'm gonna miss you too, Flyboy," she cast one last smile at him before taking a step away. "We'll keep in touch."
"Yep," Harm said taking one step away to the direction of his gate. "I'm only a phone call away, Mac."
"I'm only a plane ride away, Harm."
FOUR MONTHS LATER
Mac's House
Coronado, California
'This can't be happening,' Mac thought as she paced the length of her spacious bedroom. Her doctor back in DC had told her, made it a point, that she had less than five percent of become pregnant.
"Now I really have to call him," she whispered to the German Shepard perched on top of her bed watching her pace back and forth. The dog didn't reply and just waited as she – once again – dialed the numbers that Harriet had given her, and as she – once again – hung up the phone before the third or fourth ring.
"How am I even supposed to tell him?" she asked talking to her dog once again. "Hey Harm, you know that night, before we both left Washington? Yeah, well we really can't brush it off now, coz I'm pregnant. Yep, less than four percent my ass huh?"
Once again, Champion, her dog was unresponsive. He just looked at his owner walk back and forth babbling to herself.
After the third time she crossed the room, the handheld on the bed rang and before looking at the called ID (thankful for the distraction), she answered the phone.
"Mackenzie," she answered the phone.
"Mac, its Harm, did you call?" Harm asked her, his voice shooting her back to her nervous state a few moments earlier. She mentally cursed herself for not looking at the caller ID before answering her phone. Now she really had no choice but to tell him.
"Uhm, no," Mac said trying to cover up the fact that the last call would've made the nineteenth, no twentieth time she called him and hung up before anyone answered.
"Really?" Harm said his voice clearly sending the message that he didn't believe her, "coz I have your name here and 21 missed calls next to it."
"Twenty one?" she said surprised before she could help it, she must've called him more than she though.
"… Is… Everything okay?"
"Yeah," Mac lied. "I though I'd just take you up in the offer of that call."
"Mac, is everything Okay?" Harm repeated. "Do you need me to go there? I'll catch the-"
"Look," Mac said with a sigh, might as well get it over with right? "I don't know exactly how to say this, or how you'd react but… I'm… I'm pregnant."
"Pregnant?" Harm asked obvious surprise coating his voice. "I… Congratulations to you and the Mister."
"Harm?"
"Yeah?"
"I'm just a plane ride away," Mac started, "and so is your baby."
Mac could hear shuffling in the background, yet nothing about Harm's reaction to the current development of their complicated relationship.
"I'll be there in fifteen hours," Harm replied quickly, then added as an afterthought, "Mac?"
"Yeah, Harm?"
"I lov—Thanks."
"I'll see you in fifteen hours, flyboy."
Reviews, greatly appreciated. Even flames on my good days.