Summary: Fairytale. Hikaru is the King of a kingdom God knows where with Kaoru as his general. A series of drabbles staring our favourite twins.
A/N: My first attempt at writing a drabble story, hope you enjoy.
-King
We were a pair of brothers. Twins. We know this the moment we were born. Forever, it has just been the two of us. No one has ever broken through the strong walls we built between 'us' and 'them'. No one who came into our lives mattered to us. But it's okay, because all we need is each other.
It has always been like this. When we were five, we would roll on the grass in the royal garden with each other, laughing and believing everything is perfect. When we were eight, we would cuddle with each other at night and bury ourselves into the warmth we both love so much. When we were ten, when we held each other's hand in an empty room, we were able to ignore the emptiness around us and focus only on each other's presence. We both believed that just that is enough for us.
Forever, it has just been me. You. Us. Nothing more. Nothing less. We don't need any other people to make us feel belonged, feel loved. You know as well as I do that no one in this world loves you more than me. Just like your love for me.
There has never been verbal or written proof, but we both promised ourselves we will always stay together, never leaving each other's side.
But no matter how close we are or how strong our bond may be, only one of us can become the next ruler to this kingdom. And as the older twin, it has been decided from the very moment that we were born that it'll be me who's going to take the throne, with you by my side as support. As my general.
It was never my wish for us to end up in this situation. And I know that it wasn't yours either. But I can tell from your shining golden orbs and your sweet smile that you don't mind this arrangement.
"It really can't be helped," that's what you said, that smile never leaving you feature. "this is the fate of being born in the royal family."
You are the one who convinced me to accept this thing you call 'fate', telling me that this isn't parting, that you're still here, by my side, never leaving.
And you are the one who knew better than anyone that I trust you the most. That I could never say no to you.
So I accepted.
-Promise
It wasn't until your first trip to the neighboring country alone did we finally made a literal promise.
"Kaoru!" I pulled you into my arms immediately after your first step through the royal gate, ignoring all the royal advisors and knights around us.
"Hikaru," you whispered my name in that soft voice I missed so much, your fingers rubbing circles on my back. "it's not appropriate for the King to act so familiar, especially in public."
"I don't care about that now." I clutched to you tighter. "You've been away for so long, Kaoru. And I missed you..."
"I've only been gone for a week, Hika."
"A week is long!"
You sighed at my childishness. "Let's talk inside, shall we?" I nodded, holding your hand in mine as I led us back into my room. We were forced to have separate room after I officially stepped up as the King. We sat down on my bed, you let me enjoy this moment of just the two of us, with my hand holding onto yours like a desperate man holding onto his life line. The silence isn't awkward like the ones with the royal advisors, rather it's a comfortable one, as if we can understand what each other wants without any exchange of words.
"Hikaru," you spoke first, putting a stop to the silence hanging in the air. "you want to talk to me about something."
It wasn't a question, you knew what I'm thinking. "Kaoru," I gulped. "will... will you ever..." the last few words were muttered so softly even myself could hardly hear them.
"Yes, Hika?" you asked softly, your hand caressing my trembling one, encouraging me to voice out my thoughts.
"Will you ever leave me?"
This is it, the moment where I will receive the answer to my worst nightmare. There is no hint of surprise on your face, as if you were expecting this question all along. Then again, you've always been the person who knows me best, perhaps even better than myself.
"Now, why would I do that?"
"You're the general, Kaoru. You're always so busy with the management of this kingdom and will soon be frequently sent for meetings with the other leaders of other countries and we hardly had time to spent with each other."
"Aren't we spending time together now?"
"But we don't get to do this often!" I yelled out in frustration. "We used to go everywhere together, and I miss those times. I hate the idea of you doing something without me, it makes me feel left out."
"We cannot forever remain as children, Hikaru." I can feel your soothing voice doing its very best in healing the wounds that seems to have grown in my heart. "We have our responsibilities, our people to take care of. Otou-sama and Okaa-sama died at an early age so the need of having a new King is sudden on you, I understand that. The sudden addition of the burden of carrying on the duty of the King is hard on you, I know that. You have to carry out the lifestyle that isn't what a normal 14-years old Prince should be having, I am fully aware of that. But without you, this entire kingdom wouldn't be able to function properly, the people needs a leader, and that leader cannot be anyone other than you, Hikaru. And my duty as your twin and general is to do my work and make myself useful to the King and the kingdom. These are all what is inevitable to achieve that. Do you understand, Hikaru?"
"I understand..." I whispered, squeezing your hand tighter in mine. "doesn't mean I don't hate it..."
You sighed again. "How about this?" you pulled out your other hand, pointing out your fifth finger. "I'll make you a promise, that I will never leave your side."
"As one grows older, one figured out that people tend to lie..."
"Do you not trust me?"
I can feel the guilt eating me alive when you asked that. Those golden pools shining in the dark room, that smile radiating the purest light I've ever seen. It has always been a mystery how you could be my twin when we're so different. There is no way I could give off an aura as pure as you.
"No."
"Then there's no problem, isn't there?" your smiled widened, holding out your pinky. I held out my identical one too, locking it with yours.
"I," you started your vow. "Kaoru Hitachiin, promise to never leave the side of Hikaru Hitachiin. Whether as his twin or as his general, I will forever serve by his side, even if it costs my life..."
"If you died you wouldn't be able to stay by my side, Kaoru." I immediately pulled my hand away, a childish effort to nullify that last part of the vow.
"That is the extend that I'm willing to go to keep my promise, Hikaru." you smiled again. "Will you rest assure now? And do your part to your best ability as the ruler to this kingdom, Hikaru?"
"Yes."
-Her
Half a year later, she appeared.
The royal advisors had said that it would be better to start looking for a Queen for the kingdom. It would look bad in front of the neighboring countries if the King remains single for too long, even if he is just 14. I had refused at first, saying the idea was ridiculous. But you had convinced me to accept the idea of having constant meetings with princesses and maiden until I find one suitable enough to be titled as the next mother to the people of this kingdom. That promise you made is one reminder to me that I should be doing my best as the father to the people now that you're giving your all in supporting me.
Afterwards, countless meetings and even balls were held. I have met a number of fair maiden and even princesses, but none of them were able to capture enough of my attention to pay them second glances. Who could blame them? I had known from the start that their attempts would be met with failure and these meetings were just a waste of time. You have always been the only person worth my attention. I would never grant that privilege to another if it's ever my choice.
I had learned to skip the meetings. Even as far as jumping out of the window of my study and climb down through the vines if I had to.
That first meeting with her was quite by chance. I was walking through the streets alone, the hood of my black cloak covering my face so that no one recognize me as their king. But she was clumsy enough to bump into me. Landing on the ground ungracefully and the paper bags in her basket scattered everywhere, it was quite a pitiful scene.
"I apologize." I started gathering the paper bags and putting them back into their basket, handing it to her as she got up to her feet.
"It's okay, wasn't entirely your fault." she patted off the dust from her dress before taking the basket.
"Well, I'll be taking my leave then." I said as I walked past her, but stopped when the fabric of my cloak was tugged. "Is there something else you want?"
"Hey, how about coming over to my place for lunch?" she offered. "It'll be my treat."
I nodded. If I'm going to just wander around the place I might as well get myself a free lunch. The girl who bumped into me turned out to be the daughter of a local baker, she had just came back from her delivery and is heading back now. I followed her into a small house and sat at the table as she served the food. Thy were nothing like the ones in the castle prepared by first class chefs but they're not bad.
"So," I tried to start a conversation. "I heard that the King is looking out for a Queen." I sipped on the mushroom soup in my spoon. "Why didn't you go?"
"Oh, that." she took a bite from her bread. "I have heard from the girls around that it has happened for quite some time now, but I have no interest in that. I'm happy with my life the way it is. I don't need to marry a King and become Queen or whatsoever. I really don't understand what the others are thinking, why would someone want to marry a guy that they've never met before?"
"Probably because he's the richest person in the kingdom?"
"That's not the point. I mean, why marry someone who you clearly don't love? Just by living in luxury all day doesn't make a happy life. I think that only by marrying someone who understands you and treasure you as who you are is what's meaningful. I don't mind marrying someone without high social standing in this kingdom if he's the one who can fulfill those roles."
"Is that so?" I smirked, liking her view of this entire thing. Not only does her complete no interest in marrying rich and having a luxury life surprises me, but I can't help but agree with her on the what-kind-of-person-should-you-marry topic. I'm starting to get interested in this girl.
"Yeah." she continued eating. "Are you a foreigner? I don't think I've ever seen you in the streets before."
"Well... my identity is a secret for now, but..." another smirk. "may I know your name?"
"It's Haruhi. Haruhi Fujioka."
"Haruhi, if fate is on your side, we may meet again." I stood up from my seat. "And when that happens, you'll find out my name." I said as I walked towards the door. "See you."
-Falter
The guest list for the next ball was made by the royal council, that's a given. And of course, she didn't make the list. I was the one who ordered the messenger to specially sent the invitation to her. You looked surprised. Well, I myself am surprised by my own actions too. I barely met this 'Haruhi' for a few hours, what makes me want to consider her as a Queen candidate?
"Hikaru, when did you met this 'Haruhi' person?" you asked after the messenger left.
"I met her once when I escaped out of the castle, she's a unique girl." I smiled, remembering her long dark hair and big chocolate eyes.
"So that's what you've been doing while we were searching all around the castle for you," you smirked as you pinched my cheeks. "bad boy."
"Hey, but I went out Queen-hunting, isn't that what you want me to do?" I rebutted, dislodging your fingers from my cheeks before poking yours.
"Hikaru... stop..." you whined, swatting my fingers away. "Remember Hikaru, despite what the advisors said, you should try looking for someone whom you know you're willing to spend the rest of your life with happily."
"If that's what you want to remind me then there's no need to worry about that Kaoru," I pulled back my hands. "I already found that person."
"Really now?" you raised an eyebrow, as if not believing what I'm saying.
"Really." I smiled cheekily and wrapped my arms around your slim waist and pulled you close to my body. "Right here."
"Hikaru, I'm being serious here." you sighed as you got off from my grasp. "You need someone to stay by your side forever. And that person cannot be me. You need to get wife. A Queen. I can only stay with you until you get married, and after that I can never be as close to you as I am now, even if I want to."
"W-What?" I gagged at your words. You can't be serious now, can you? "Y-You've got to be kidding me, Kao. There's no way that could ever happen. You promised to stay by my side forever." I know what you mean, when I get a wife it's natural to want to spend more time with her, right? But no one ever said that I'll spend any less time with you, so what are you saying now?
You look thoughtful for a minute, as if remembering the promise you made. "I did." you smiled, like you always did, but I can tell that you aren't so sure yourself too, but didn't fail to keep encouraging me. "We'll just see how it goes."
-Acceptance
The first time you met her is during that ball we held in the castle. You seemed to like her too. Though, I really can't expect anything other than that, we had liked the same thing since forever, being identical twins and all. She's beautiful, and her charming smile and straightforward believes makes her easily well-liked by the others.
However, having low social standards and all, the royal council does not approve for her to be the next Queen.
"Why not?!" I screamed at the royal advisors in the meeting room. "You have been searching for the past three months for someone I am willing to accept as my Queen and I finally found one, so what's the problem now?"
"Your Highness," the black-haired head advisor with glasses spoke first, "a Queen plays a very important role in managing the kingdom, thus the image she portraits is also unneglectable. Even if you choose not to marry a princess from neighboring countries, we must still insist you marry someone regal and pretentious, a courtier or the daughter of a Baron would be ideal for that category."
"Your Highness," the blond sitting beside the raven spoke next. "Kyoya has a good point. And personally, I think that due to being raised in a low-standard family, Fujioka-san will be having a hard time getting used to managing the kingdom. Even if we, the royal council, will be there to guide her, the amount of time she needs to adapt to living in the affluent societies is all a matter of luck and her own will."
"Further more, the impression of our Queen being peasant-blooded is going to without a doubt leave a bad impression on our neighboring countries." Kyoya added, adjusting his glasses. "This could lead to severe consequences to the kingdom such as economic disadvantage and loss of trading. Sorry to say this, but we won't be able to deal with such consequences if they were to ever happen, your Highness. So please reconsider your decision."
Facing the argument and criticism of the royal advisors, I wasn't able to give a single rebuttal. It wasn't my fault. Out of all the girls in the world, the one I had fallen for is peasant-blooded. Of all I know, I could have remained single for the rest of my life if I hadn't met her. She's the only one I'm willing to marry and I swear no other woman is able to catch my eyes like she did. And asking me to choose another candidate for my 'Queen' position now is just torturing me. But at the same time I wasn't able to offer the public with an undebatable reason to accept her as their Queen.
"Ah hem," everyone in the room turned their attention to you, who had just cleared your throat. "Minna-san, first of all, I don't think we will ever find another Queen who is acceptable by his Highness. I trust that you have all seen his Highness's attitude towards princesses and maiden who have visited for the past three months, no? And I believe his Highness's behavior tells us that he is clearly not interested in them and that he already has someone else in mind, don't you think?"
Kaoru, what are you talking about? I didn't even know Haruhi when I met the other women. I stared at you with incredulity, wondering what are you trying to pull.
"Kaoru-sama, I understand your point." Kyoya replied. "But when it comes to choosing the future Queen, I believe whether or not his Highness loves her or not should never be our concern. We just need a political marriage to help us economically. If Fujioka-san is able to do that, then I have nothing against it. But as everyone can tell, she isn't. So I'm very sorry, but I can't agree to this."
"Kyoya-san, during the short conversations I had with Fujioka-san, I truly believe she is a very smart individual and is able to carry out the duty of a Queen perfectly. She may not be as educated as a courtier or the daughter of a Baron but I doubt she will be any worse than any princess once she has gone through the lessons required. As for the peasant-blooded issue, I believe that as long as Fujioka-san fulfills her duty as the mother to the people of this kingdom, no one will have any objections to her being Queen."
"Even if you say that, Kaoru-sama, how certain are you that whatever you just said will turn into reality? I believe today is also the first day you met Fujioka-san. In whatever short conversations you two have, I doubt that you can actually know enough about her to deem her worthy as Queen."
"Rest assure, Kyoya-san. I promise that whatever I said will become reality. I assure you that Fujioka-san will turn into the Queen that will meet your standards if you give me the opportunity to prove it to you. If you could give me the time, I will personally tutor Fujioka-san into the Queen that can be accepted by everyone in the kingdom. Is that all right with you?"
I stared at you in disbelief. When everyone objected my decision, you are the only one who still supported me, willing to debate with those who is against me. That moment I really wonder why are you willing to go this far just to let Haruhi be my Queen? I'm just 14, never experience love before, saw one random girl in the streets who interests me and demanded she be my Queen. Even I myself isn't sure why I wanted her to be my wife so desperately. She could even mean just a 'toy' to me, I might not even love her. So why are you doing this?
The room fell complete silence as we waited for the raven's answer. It was only after the third minute did the head advisor finally nodded.
-Forgotten
Haruhi's development in the two year time limit that Kyoya had given surprised everyone.
She is indeed talented. No one will ever believe that she's born peasant if one never asks.
"Your Highness." you bowed upon seeing me entering the royal library, where you're having lessons with my future Queen.
"How's her progress?" I asked while looking at my soon-to-be wife who is flipping through a book on the second level of the giant library.
"Good." is your straightforward answer. "She's improving everyday. Faster and faster, might I add."
"Is that so?"
"This is great, isn't it? Now that she has the knowledge she needs to manage the kingdom and Kyoya has finally approved for her being the next Queen."
"Yeah..."
"You're happy, nee?"
If I wasn't so focused on the girl, in the pink dress that we supplied her with and her brown locks falling over her face and shoulder as her big brown orbs moved rapidly over the words, I might have noticed that smile on your face.
The smile that I used to love so much.
I started spending more time with the brunette. Asking her about her progress and constantly encouraging her whenever I have finished with my paper work and is paying her a visit in the library. Short exchanges of words were done during every visit. Although she was surprised to know that I'm the King we spoke about the other day and she is the one who the said King wants as his Queen, she didn't question anything further and just went along with the lessons.
Before long, my world started revolving around her. I started remembering every detail of her. Her favourite colour. Her favourite food. Even her favourite shampoo. It has been the first time ever in my life that I actually truly cared for another. But at the same time, I started caring less for other stuff.
"Hikaru!"
The door to my study was burst open as you came rushing towards me at my desk.
"Kaoru," I addressed as I looked up from my work and into your identical gold irises, you had both your hands planted on my desk. you're slightly out of breath and there's traces of crystal sweats rolling down your neck. "what's the matter?"
"Your Highness," you panted, trying to catch your breath. "thank God, nothing happened to you."
"Of course," I nodded before looking back to my files. "why would anything happen to me?"
"You didn't come to meet me at the royal garden like you said you would..." you sound hurt, or maybe it's just my imagination.
"I apologize, brother dear. But the royal council suddenly called for a meeting regarding the wedding as well as the ceremony where Haruhi will officially be titled as 'Queen' of the kingdom. It's something I cannot be absent from."
"I see..." my eyes went back to the papers I was once looking through, so I didn't notice those small droplets at the corner of your eyes.
"Sorry, brother. Maybe next time." I said in a monotonous voice, not even realizing when you have already left my study.
—
"Your Highness!" a knight came running into the library where I'm visiting Haruhi. "The messenger from the neighboring country is waiting in the hall. He said that he's here to talk with you about the alliance that the two countries will be signing."
I didn't even pay a glance at the knight from where I sit beside the brunette. "Tell him I'm busy. I will ask someone to call him back tomorrow when I have the time to talk with him."
"But your Highness," the knight said while still on his knee. "the messenger said that you had already agreed that the alliance will be signed by today."
"I'm sorry," my voice is cold and my tone is harsh. "but I don't remember ever agreeing to such a thing."
"B-But, your Highness..."
"If I don't remember it, that means it never happened before. You can't expect me to agree to something that never happened before, can you?" I glared at the knight. "If that is understood then get out of my sight this instant."
"Y-Yes... Your Highness..."
"Your Highness, you should really go see that messenger." you commented from your position beside me as the knight made his way out of the library. "Alliance is a big deal between the two countries, nothing should come before that."
"Kaoru, even if you are the general, you are in no place to question my decision." I turned my attention back to my future Queen. "I expect you to not make the same mistake twice, is that understood?"
"...Yes, your Highness."
-Farewell
"Hikaru,"
"Your Highness."
"Hikaru, it's just the two of us, no one else is here now."
"Kaoru, we discussed this already. Even if it's not in public, you shall formally address me as 'Your Highness'."
"Nii-chan..."
"Your Highness." I corrected you once again, but it doesn't seem like you're caring about that matter now.
"Nii-chan, please..." you looked up at me with those glassy golden eyes of yours. You were pleading. "I miss calling you that..."
"Kaoru, drop this meaningless conversation already. Don't you need to go already?" I waved a hand at you, signalling for you to make your leave. You don't seem willing to leave just yet but obeyed my words anyway, bowing before heading towards the door.
"Hikaru," you stopped just beside the door, your hand on the handle, ready to open the door. Yet there you are, wearing a despairing look that I have never seen before, clenching so hard on it, your hands shaking, as if you don't want to open it. Don't want to leave. "Do you still remember that promise I made to you when we were 14?"
"I don't recall any of such a thing, Kaoru. You should know very clearly that I have work to do and a kingdom to manage, something that happened such a long time ago should not matter to me."
"Is that so..."
"If you don't make your leave now you will be late for the meeting with the neighboring country, Kaoru."
Drawing a quick breath, you finally opened the door, your eyes never leaving mine. "Hikaru,"
For the first time since you entered my study, I looked up at you. Identical golden orbs of the royal family met each other.
"Goodbye."
The last word was whispered so softly that I hardly heard it as it was followed by the sound of the door meeting the jamb.
And you were gone.
I didn't feel the need to question you what was that all about. As members of the royal family, we often have to be parted to settle business with the partnership countries. Even we need our farewells.
But in the end, I always know that you'll come back.
-Missing
The wedding between me and Haruhi was held after you left.
Under the witness of everyone in the kingdom, we made our vows and exchanged our rings. I kissed my bride in the grand hall which is decorated with white roses. In her white wedding dress that dragged along the red-carpeted floor and her veil held up in her brown hair that had been braided into an up do, she really looks like a princess. A princess who is now a Queen.
Words of congrats were received. Some commented on how beautiful their Queen is. Some said that they have faith in the future of the kingdom that lies in our hands. Some even said that they look forward to seeing their new prince or princess in the near future.
But even in this room filled with people, men; women; elders; children, I can't help but feel that something is not right. That something is missing.
"Hikaru-sama, what's wrong?"
I turned to look at my Queen and instantly smiled. "Nothing, dear."
I must be imagining things.
A few months later, the group that went with you to the neighboring country came back.
But you weren't with them.
"Where's the general?" I asked when one of the royal advisors who had gone with you came into my study for the report.
"Your Highness," the brunette who came in bowed. "Kaoru-sama and Tamaki were requested to stay in the country for a few more days to discuss about the agreements the two countries will be signing. It appears that the leaders of the country were still unsatisfied by our demands and wish to negotiate further."
So that's what is going on, huh? Well, it can't be helped. If a few more days is what is needed for the two countries to sign on the agreements, then a few more days shall be given.
"Very well then, you may take your leave."
The advisor bowed before leaving the folder he was carrying on my desk before exiting from the door. I didn't even took notice of how his hand trembled when he placed it there.
-Dream
Everything's perfect.
The sky is blue and the clouds are white. The cool breeze that blows against my face and hair is refreshing. A day without any paper work to do spent with Haruhi, my Queen, in the royal garden is the best.
"Hikaru," the gentle voice was whispered into my ear as a soft hand caressed my own. "isn't everything just perfect?"
"It sure is..." I tangled my long fingers in her dark brown hair, enjoying how it feels so smooth and soft in my hand.
"It feels like we don't need anything else, anyone else, nee?"
"Yeah, no one el-"
Wait, no, that's not it.
Suddenly, the blue sky and the green grass are gone, replaced by total darkness. What remained are just Haruhi and the bench we were sitting on.
"W-What? What is going on?"
"Hikaru," Haruhi muttered, her hand reached out and cupped my cheeks. "don't you feel that even without anything here, you won't feel the emptiness?"
"Huh? What are you talking about, Haruhi? If there is nothing here of course it will be empty." I debated, not understanding what the brunette is saying.
"But Hikaru dear,"the girl whispered, caressing my cheek. "when you love somebody, everything else shouldn't matter. Should it?"
"But..." I wasn't able to respond to that as my Queen vanished into darkness.
"Haruhi! Where did you go?"
'Hey, Hikaru.'
I turned around, looking for the source of that voice. The voice that sounds so... familiar... yet I can't quite distinguish it. I ran around in the darkness, searching desperately for something, somebody, anybody. But all there is is darkness. Endless darkness.
Giving up on hope, I crashed onto my knees. My hands clenched into fists on the ground as sweat droplets rolled down my neck and forehead. I panted heavily as I tried to catch my breath from running in the darkness that I had no idea how to get out from, thinking what a pathetic sight this is of the all-mighty King himself.
It was then when I felt a hand on my shoulder.
'Hey, Hikaru.'
"Kaoru..." the name slipped out of my mouth before I could help it. I was able to recognize the voice this time when it was whispered so close to me. A smile fell on my face as I looked up from the ground to lock eyes with a pair of familiar golden irises.
'Hikaru...'
It was only then did I notice how sad you looked. You are still smiling like always, but somehow I can feel the tears behind your eyes. That's not the only problem. Your whole body seems so... transparent?
"Kao-ru..." my eyes widened when the hand that I tried to grasp just literally slipped through me. "W-What happened to you?"
'Hikaru...' you closed your eyes as you took my hand in yours. I couldn't feel any skin, muscles, bones. Just coldness. 'Hikaru, I'm sorry...'
"W-What for?" I tried to touch your shoulder but all my hand did was went right through it.
'I'm sorry.'
"Kaoru, just what is wrong with you? Why are you apologizing and why are you like this?"
'I'm so sorry.'
"Kaoru, whatever it is, I forgive you, okay? Just explain to me what is going on."
'I'm so sorry, Hikaru...'
"Kaoru, just what-" I couldn't finish my sentence as the hand that's holding onto mine starts fading, along with the rest of you. "Kaoru?"
'I'm so sorry, nii-chan...' you whispered before disappearing into the darkness.
"Kaoru!" I tried to hold you. To touch you. But all those efforts were futile as you disappeared in front of my eyes. "Where are you going? Kaoru!"
'I couldn't keep my promise...'
-Reunion
It had been one month, counting today itself. You are still not back. No matter how much the agreement mattered to the countries, one entire month is too much to ask for. Reports were still sent in everyday without fail, but the handwriting is changing drastically. They are no longer the neat and almost artistic handwriting of yours that I remembered vaguely. It has been too long since I actually took note of details about you. As more reports came in, the handwriting has become more and more messy and simple.
A week had passed since that dream. Without me realizing, I had started neglecting you. Now the memory of you is slowly fading and I don't like that. The dream had made me realize how much I had neglected you and how much you meant to me, now I just don't want to lose you like I did in my dream.
The day has finally came for me to personally make a visit. It must have been a sight to see for the commoners. The King making his way through a foreign country with no subordinates by his side, not even a carriage, just his loyal horse. Dashing his way through the streets, not glancing at any eyes that starred his way, not turning back or away, just kept dashing forward. I don't care what they think of me now, all that is in my mind is the urge to see my brother there and then. Somewhere in me, a soft and gentle voice is telling me that if I don't see you now, I won't be able to forgive myself.
—
"Y-Your Highness!" the blond exclaimed upon seeing my face behind the door.
"Where is he?" I wasted no time in making my point.
"Your Highness, w-what brings you here?"
"You're one to talk, aren't you and that identical twin of mine the ones that stayed here for another month after the day you were suppose to return to the kingdom?"
"Y-Your Highness, I can explain..." the blond stuttered as I invited myself into the room.
"Hey Kaoru!" I shouted at the corridor, my voice echoing through the whole place. "Come out this minute. I expect an explanation of your delay."
My words were met with silence. Nothing in the house even shifted. Not the door. Not the floor. It's like the place is complete lack of a living being.
"Your Highness," the advisor made his way towards me, clearing his throat. "K-Kaoru-sama i-isn't here at the moment. How about you go back to the kingdom first. I'll report to you once he came ba-"
"There is no need for that." I cut him off abruptly before he could finish and made myself comfortable on a nearby couch. "I'll just wait here until he gets back."
"B-But your Highness, don't you have other important business you need to settle back in the kingdom? K-Kaoru-sama might take very long to come back, we can't have you waiting here all da-"
"Do you have any dissatisfaction with me staying here?" my golden devil-like eyes narrowed and sharpened into a slit, telling the advisor to keep his mouth shut. Good thing he got the message and didn't push the matter further.
Ten minutes passed. Thirty minutes passed. An hour. Two. Three. I had lost count after that, but the door never even creaked once. You are nowhere seen.
"Your Highness," the blond spoke from beside me. "it's already getting dark. If you don't leave now, you won't make it back to the castle alone. How about I escort you back to the castle? I will deliver whatever message you have for Kaoru-sama to him when he gets back."
"Silence." a single glare along with the harsh tone are enough to get the advisor to shut up, he quickly retreated to the corner of the room like a kicked puppy. Like I cared about that now. I got up from my seat I've been sitting on for the past... day, I guess, and strolled towards the door.
"Y-Your Highness?"
"I'm going out to look for him."
"Eh?! W-Wait a moment, you can't be serious! It's dangerous to go out at a time like this. It's dark outside and the villagers said that wild animals come out during this time. Hold on, YOUR HIGHNESS!"
—
The advisor had finally given up hope on asking me to leave and confessed that you two didn't stay because of the agreement but for your own selfish reasons. I was mad all right. Just what were you thinking? Doing things on your own and such, what makes you think you have the authority to do that?
"So, where is he now?"
The blond said nothing as he led me towards one of the rooms upstairs. His hand clenched onto the handle and shook violently. Getting tired of waiting, I pushed him aside and opened the door myself, only to have myself staring numbly at the sight before me. There you are, after one month of leaving my side, laid on the bed and covered in the white sheets. Your eyes are shut to the world and your skin is paler than ever.
"...Hey, Kaoru." I made my way towards your body on the bed, wishing very hard that the advisor didn't see the stiffness in my body. "This isn't the time to be sleeping right?" I placed my hand on your chest before shaking you slowly. "Hey Kaoru, don't you have more important things to do other than sleep? Wake up already." Something is not right, and I know it, yet I don't want to admit it, but the touch in my hand just have to disagree with whatever I'm trying to convince myself. Kaoru, I...
I can't feel your heart beat.
"Your Highness," the advisor has bowed his head, his golden locks shielding whatever emotions his eyes held. "please stop this. Kao-Kaoru-sama won't wake up, ever again..."
There it is, the final blow.
"Heh, what are you talking about?" I tried to keep my stern face on and prevent my voice from shaking. "Kaoru, hurry up and wake up and tell this guy he's being ridiculous."
"Your Highness!" the advisor had gotten onto his knees, his body shook uncontrollably and he looks like he's on the verge of breaking apart. "I know that this is hard on you, but please, you can't deny it! Kaoru-sama is deceased and will no longer wake up. It is the fact!"
Even if I know, he doesn't have to rub it in my face. Hearing it that many times is just too much.
I sat down on the bed beside you and clasped your hand. It felt cold and lifeless compared to my own.
"How did this happened?"
-Stop
-One month ago-
"Kaoru-sama, I beg you, please stop already!"
The kingdom's royal advisor's voice quavered at the sight of the young general, shaking fingers holding the handkerchief closely to his mouth as he coughed violently, dying the initially pure white cloth in a scarlet crimson of the blood. His other hand still holding onto the pen that he hadn't let go since the start of the day, filling up papers after papers.
"Kaoru-sama, please stop." the advisor placed a hand over the redhead's, stopping him from his writing. "You need your rest, you can't recover at this rate. Please, let me handle all that while you go get some sleep."
His hand was spat away the minute it landed as the general ignored his words and continued his work.
"Kaoru-sama!" the older man screamed in exasperation as his hands moved to the boy's shoulders, turning him around so that he's facing him. "You need to recover from your illness! This kingdom still needs you. We all need you. His Highness needs you!" Words of worry mixed with anger were thrown as the sick general, trying desperately to bring some senses into him.
A cold and pale hand made its way onto one of the advisors wrist before gently pulling it away from the redhead's shoulder.
"Tamaki," the golden eyes of the royal family that were once radiating the brightest light in the world, now heavy-lidded and dull, stared into the advisor's violet ones, a reassuring smile adorning the general's pale yet still handsome face. "thank you. But please, let me finish my work. This will probably be my last one already, I want to finish it without any regret..."
"Don't say such things, there is no way you can die! You're just a little tired. You'll soon get better and return to our kingdom with the rest of us." big, warm hands held onto long, shivering ones, the advisor's face was twisted in pain, staring down at the young general that look so sick and dangerously fragile.
"Tamaki, you were there when the doctor visited right? You heard what he said, didn't you?"
The advisor clenched his teeth as his hands slowly let go of the general's, landing by his sides and balled into fists in an attempt to fight off the pain he felt for the younger one and that he wasn't able to do anything to change the cruel reality.
"This illness of mine, can no longer be cured already." the general closed his eyes, his hand patting gently on the advisor's tense shoulder. "No one can do anything about it. This is my fate. You don't need to blame yourself for anything, just please let me finish my last work in perfection."
The advisor can do nothing but nod at the request spoken in the weak voice.
-Questions
"Ridiculous." I tried to make my voice sound angry, but all that came out was a sniffle. "Didn't he know what the people would think of their King when they found out that he isn't even aware of his own general, his twin brother's death?"
No. That's not it. That's not the real reason why I'm upset and angry.
I'm angry because you didn't tell me.
Why, Kaoru? We used to be so close together. Nobody can separate us. We were practically joined at the hips from the moment we were born. And yet... you didn't tell me something as serious as this? Don't you trust me anymore, Kaoru? Don't you think that I'm important to you anymore? Kaoru, just what do you see in me? I couldn't have neglected you that much, could I?
"Your Highness, please, that is definitely not the reason why neither Kaoru-sama nor myself failed to inform you. It's just that..."
"'Just', what?"
"Just that... he said something about not wanting to break a promise..."
"Promise?"
"...Yes, your Highness."
What promise? With whom? About what? What has this had to do with my unawareness of your death, Kaoru?
'I'm sorry, nii-chan...'
"Kaoru!"
'I couldn't keep my promise...'
My eyes widened at the memory of the dream I had a week ago. Am I the one you made the promise to, Kaoru? But I couldn't have possibly forgotten something that is between the two of us, could I?
"What sort of promise?" Of course, the easiest and quickest way of getting an answer would be asking Tamaki.
"I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to answer that question, your Highness." the blond advisor bowed with sincerity. "Kaoru-sama didn't stress on details regarding that promise, I also didn't question him further."
"Is that so?" Guess not.
If you didn't tell anyone about that promise even before you... that word that I don't want to admit, then it must have been a very important and personal promise, am I right, Kaoru? I closed my eyes as I tried desperately to recall something. Anything. Something about a promise. I don't really made much promises so it can't be hard to remember, right? A promise... about Kaoru... about death...
"I, Kaoru Hitachiin, promise to never leave the side of Hikaru Hitachiin. Whether as his twin or as his general, I will forever serve by his side, even if it costs my life..."
I opened my eyes as the memory finally rose up.
Damn it! Is that the promise that you wish to keep even in your death? The promise that even I, the one who had you made that promise in the first place, had forgotten? Damn it, Kaoru. Why? Why do I have to remember all these now? I gritted my teeth as tears threatened to form in the corner of my eyes.
"I'm incredibly sorry, your Highness." Tamaki whispered. "Even though he is unable to prevent his death, Kaoru-sama still wants the best for you after his death. He truly care for you, your Highness."
"How's so?"
-Fall
-One week ago-
"Kaoru-sama, please hang in there!" the advisor could do nothing but clench at the dying boy's hand tightly. The young general had fainted that day while finishing the last bit of his work, sending the sick boy crashing on the wooden floor along with his chair and papers scattering around the room. The advisor was so worried that he got the doctor with him rushing into the room and tending to the boy. The said boy was then bedridden and hardly able to move from that point onwards.
"T-Tamaki..." the redhead used whatever energy left in him to make out his last words.
"Kaoru-sama..." the advisor's body wracked with convulsion of grief as he tried to hold back the tears that's threatening to fall from his eyes. Their general is still so young and has yet to experience adulthood and now his life has to be taken away from him. Just how cruel can God be? "If you have followed the doctor's instructions and rest well, you might have been able to live longer..."
"I'm grateful to whatever time I've been given already, being able to live until this point... I have no regrets..."
"Kaoru-sama, please, at least hang in there until we get back to our kingdom." the advisor sniffed. "I'm sure his Highness still wants to see you one last time before..." the words got stuck in his throat and he was not able to successfully utter them without letting some tears fall.
"Tamaki, promise me something."
*sniff* "Yes?"
"Please..." the general's words came out raspy and drained of energy. "don't tell Hikaru... his Highness... about this..."
"W-What?!" the advisor blinked in surprise at the request. "B-But why?"
"Hi-His Highness still needs his general... He w-won't be able to take it if he found out about my death... Though... our King... is no longer that ignorant kid who lives in his own world anymore... He has grown up... to be a great King... no longer needs me by his side anymore... He is able to take care of himself... perfectly fine... even capable of taking care of others... I'm happy that I am able to die after he learnt that... I'll be able to rest in peace like this..."
"H-Hikaru-sama is not just our King, Kaoru-sama. He's your brother. He needs you more than anything by his side."
"What he still need is someone to finish all the work for him... He no longer needs a brother to cling onto and depend on every second of the day... A general isn't that hard to replace... But I don't think he'll get over with my death that easily... I don't want this to affect him... when he had just managed to settle everything down. *cough cough* So, please... don't let him find out..."
"How is he not going to find out?" the advisor asked, not knowing how is he going to fulfill this request. "He surely will suspect something if he saw you not returning with us."
"H-He would not suspect a thing i-if I send in the report e-everyday..." long, dark eyelashes fall onto the eyes that were now drained of colours and life as the owner's voice became nothing more than a whisper.
"Kaoru-sama!"
"Promise me..."
"I... I promise you, Kaoru-sama." the advisor gripped the lifeless hand in his tightly. "I'll keep this promise as long as I live."
The boy gave one last smile before finally not able to keep his eyes open any longer.
"Thank you..."
And his hand fell.
-Movement
"That's enough." I whispered to the blond. It's soft but he heard it. "You may take your leave now."
The advisor bowed after a few seconds of hesitation, closing the door as he left the room, giving me more privacy with you.
"Kaoru," I placed my hand on your shoulder. "wake up."
But I didn't get a reply. Nor any movement.
I frowned. I know I shouldn't expect an answer but I can't help it. This can't be true right? Hurry up and wake up and tell me that you're just sleeping, Kaoru. I know that you don't break promises, you never did. That's the kind of person you are. Sweet, sensitive and selfless. You always places others before yourself, to the extend that sometimes I'm really scared of just how far you are willing to go for someone else's sake. Someone like you shouldn't die like this. You don't deserve to end up like this, Kaoru!
"Wake up now, Kaoru." I shook you with all the strength I got but you didn't even budge. "This isn't a request, it's an order. Wake up this instant and beg for forgiveness for being late for this long."
You still didn't give me a reply.
"Damn it, Kaoru." I slapped your cheek gently as I stared at your pale expression. "Wake up already. You don't want to make your dear Nii-chan worry, do you?"
No reply yet again. Damn it, just say something! Anything would do! Or open your eyes, Kaoru!
"Kaoru Hitachiin! If you don't open your eyes this moment I'm never talking to you again!"
This is my last card up my sleeve. It usually always lets me have my way with you when we were younger. But no, you still laid there motionlessly, like a doll.
I can't believe I'm doing this now. It almost seemed like a dream now. Like I couldn't actually be getting you to wake up now and you completely ignoring me, because that couldn't have possibly happened. Just a month ago you were still perfectly fine and walking and talking. So why aren't you waking up now?! You couldn't have possibly died, right? Because you are not supposed to die before me, that's our promise. You don't just break a promise without saying anything!
"Nii-chan, please... I miss calling you that..."
"Hikaru... goodbye."
A tear finally escaped my eyes as the memory came crashing down onto me.
-Broken
I can't believe you did it.
You broke a promise.
You never break your promise. Especially those with me.
How could you do this to me, Kaoru? You don't break promises. I do. And yet you are always able to forgive me no matter how many times it happened.
Is this punishment? For breaking all those promises with you?
I held your body up and bring it close to my own. My hand on your back and the other one buried in your hair, my face resting beside your neck as I finally lost it and tears streamed down my face. Yet there you are, still motionless as ever. Your hands still lying still by your sides, not rubbing circles on my back like you used to do. I can't feel your warmth breath against my shoulder like it should and you're still not uttering a single word. No light scolding of how a King shouldn't be acting so emotional in front of others nor words of comfort. No 'It's okay, Hikaru.' nor 'I'm right here, Hikaru.'
Does it always hurt you this much when I broke our promises? Fuck, it hurts a lot. I could feel my stomach contracting like a tight ball inside me and the feeling of grief and sorrow was growing like cancer in me. How could you do this to me, Kaoru? How could you?
How could you leave me?
You promised that you'll stay by my side forever. Fuck, how are you suppose to do that now? Do you really expect me to live normally from this point onward? Just what makes you think I can live through this?
I am the King of this kingdom, your superior, you big brother. And yet you hide a matter as big as this from me? If I didn't come here personally today, just how long are you intending to hide this from me? I have all the rights to be aware of this, yet you wanted to prevent me out of all people to know. Just what am I to you? What do you see in me? Don't you think I should have a say in this matter? Is my feelings not important to you? Are you really trying to hide something as big as death from me forever?
"Hikaru, do you still remember that promise I made to you when we were 14?"
"I don't recall any of such a thing, Kaoru. You should know very clearly that I have work to do and a kingdom to manage, something that happened such a long time ago should not matter to me."
If I don't remember it, that means it never happened before. You can't expect me to agree to something that never happened before, can you?
Huh, is that it? Is that why you feel that the promise is not important anymore? Fuck, why am I only remembering all these now out of all time? If only I had remembered earlier, maybe it wouldn't have hurt this much. If only I had remembered earlier, maybe that promise could still be kept. You could still be talking, breathing, alive.
Why must it be you, Kaoru? I don't want you to give me your life, I want you alive. I want you to stay by my side forever like you promised. Heck, why else would I have asked you to even make that promise?!
It certainly has been a long time since I wanted someone to stay with me.
I didn't wish for Haruhi to stay with me. I chose to stay with her. With her I feel happy, but yet I could still live without her.
But you're different, Kaoru. I didn't even realize until now. I couldn't live without you. You're always by my side, since the moment we were born. I had gotten used to your presence around me. Your smile. Your laughter. Your face. Your voice. Your everything. How am I going to continue living with all that gone from me now?
"Please, Kao." I muttered, allowing the tears to roll down my face and land on yours. "Wake up. I need you here. I really do."
-Return
"Your Highness, it's about time for us to return to our kingdom. There are still lots of work waiting for you to complete. The kingdom also needs its ruler back in order to continue its daily routine." the advisor reported by the door to the room we were in, across from the bed where I held you in my arms. I haven't let go of your body since the first day I arrived. Dried tears stained both of my cheeks from days and nights of crying over the lost of you, my dear twin. With your head resting against my chest and my face buried in your hair, the advisor isn't able to see the traces of evidence of my weakened state. Nobody is supposed to see this side of me except you, Kaoru.
"The other members of the royal council will be able to handle everything for little longer. There is no need for my return anytime soon." I replied, keeping my voice and tone in check. After a week of crying, my voice has cracked a bit and my breathing is constantly uneven, but I still decided to put up a strong front before the public. They can't see their powerful and royal King in the state that I am in now.
"Your Highness, please." Tamaki bowed lowly, "Kaoru-sama has left us. As much as it hurts myself and most probably everyone in the kingdom, it is the reality that we cannot change. But we still need you to guide us through, my lord. The kingdom still needs its King back. Kaoru-sama is gone forever and you can't just stay here forever with him. You need to return to the place where both of you belongs to, the place where the people needs you more than anything else now." Keeping his head low and his eyes shut tightly, the kingdom's advisor said. I can't really see his face at the moment, but his voice sounds strangled and he's probably tearing up now from the sound of sniffling in the room.
I remained silent. My hand stroking circles on your back, as if a parent trying to comfort an upset child. But the again, I'm the one who is upset here and you are... not here with me anymore...
"Before Kaoru-sama's last breath, he said he believe that you are a good king, one who is capable of taking care of himself as well as others. I don't wish to disappoint his belief and I'm sure neither do you."
I sighed. The fate of being born in the royal family, is forever a burden to us. There are the responsibilities and the people and you can't choose to do what you want to do. "All right. Prepare my horse."
—
Everyone in the kingdom seems to have stopped in between their tasks and paid a glance at our direction. I carried you in my arms while my horse carried us back to the castle. I haven't let go of you even once. A childish attempt in hoping that I wouldn't lose you again.
The maids and servants waiting for us at the entrance offered to carry you back into your room but I insisted on doing it personally. Sitting both of us on your bed, I stroke a hair from your face. "Hey Kaoru, we're home."
Yo didn't utter a single word. I should have gotten used to it by now, for the past one week you didn't respond to a single thing that I said.
How ironic. Getting used to being ignored like this when I hadn't for the past 16 years of my life.
That is how close we used to be, Kaoru. And now... fuck. Tears ran down my eyes again. They had been doing that for the past one week, almost never stopping. Even when they stopped, more salty drops quickly ran down my cheeks again in streaming cascades. After I remembered that promise you made two years ago, I can't feel anything but regret. Memories of how you have always supported my throughout the toughest times of my life and always by my side when I need you filled my mind endlessly. All those things you are willing to do for me, yet I didn't even said a single 'thank you' to you. I abandoned you once I found someone else to keep me company. I ignored your feelings and focused on gaining the attention of the girl who caught my eyes.
And now you're gone.
"I'm the one that's suppose to be sorry, Kaoru..." I sniffed. "I'm so so sorry..."
But you still didn't respond.
-Wish
"NO!" I screamed at the guards standing around the bed, where I held you close to me. "I won't let you take him from me!"
"Your Highness, Kaoru-sama had passed for two weeks already." one of the guards stood up. "It is time we let him rest in peace."
"He is in peace!" I tightened my grip on your body, trying to prevent the guards from taking you away. "He is in peace when he's with me! Not in the ground!"
"Your Highness," I glared at the raven advisor as he walked into your room. "Kaoru-sama is already gone from us. No matter how much you tried to keep him by your side, he still wouldn't come back. It's best if you let go of your childishness and let us bury him so that he could rest peacefully."
"NO!" I drew my sword and pointed it at the head advisor. "I wouldn't let anyone touch him! I order you to back off this instant!"
"Your Highness! Please point your sword away from Kyoya-sama." the guards said as they drew their weapons too. "Or we'll have no choice but to force you to do so."
"Point it away from him, you say?" I smirked as I quickly pointed the blade against my own neck instead, ignoring the terrorized expressions on everyone 's faces. "Is this better for you?"
"Y-Your Highness..." the guards stuttered, their swords shaking in their hands. "P-Please... we can talk about this nicely... P-Place your sword down, please..."
"Throw away your weapons." I ordered. The guards didn't look willing to but still followed hesitantly, throwing their swords on the floor.
"Now get out." None of them moved. I felt that more drastic actions need to be done to force them to follow my order, so I pressed my sword further into my neck until it drew blood. "I said get out!" I roared at the advisor and the guards before they quickly dashed towards the door, shutting it behind them.
I let out a sigh of relief before throwing my own sword away. "They're all gone now, Kaoru." I whispered into your ear as I caressed your cheek. "The bad guys are gone now. Nii-chan will protect you all right? I wouldn't let anyone separate us..."
—
"Are you really okay with this?" a man dressed in all white asked the redhead who is glancing into the silver river that showed the world of mortals. "He hasn't been himself since your death. He hasn't eaten nor slept. He even neglected his work and his wife."
"I know that," the redhead wiped away a single tear that flowed down his cheek. The boy hasn't left the silver river since the first day he came into heaven, watching over his twin brother in the world of the living. He was touched by the actions of his brother who was still living while himself was dead, but at the same time he doesn't bear to see him suffering like this. Days and days have passed, those golden eyes that once shone like the sun itself are now always tearing up. The smiling face that he had always loved so much now gone from the world. And all of that were his fault. "but there's nothing I can do..."
"What do you want for him, Kaoru?" the man asked as his long silver hair danced in the wind along with his white robes.
"I..." the addressed teen bite his lower lips as he lowered his head. "I... want him to forget about me... To continue living without the memory of me..."
"That won't be a problem, but are you sure about this? If he forgets about you it means to remove every trace of your existence from their world."
"...Yes...I'm sure..."
"You're crying."
The teen lowered his head further to hide his tear-stained face.
"Look, Kaoru. I care about you and that's why I'm here. I am offering you a wish now, a wish for your brother..." the man glanced at the young King shown in the river. "and you."
The redhead could do nothing but cry. He wants to go back to his brother and hug him, tell him that everything is all right, that he is here. But the reality is that he could never do any of such things again.
Because he has died.
"I want both you and your brother to be happy, Kaoru." the man said. "I have been here for hundreds of years, seen millions of people dying and coming to this world. They would grief over their loved ones in this silver river, but none of them stayed as long as you. And it pains me to see you in this state. So here I am, offering you one single wish. You should know too, when God himself grants you a wish, you are free to ask for anything you want. Now tell me kid, what is your wish?"
The teen sniffed before glancing down at the dead body of his own in his brother's arms.
"I wish for my body to be gone from their world."
-Gone
I woke up the next morning in my bed, in my room. I am not sure why I had fallen asleep in the first place but it sure has been a long time since I slept this deep, probably around... a week.
Shit!
I threw the covers away as I dashed towards your room. I hadn't slept since the day I found you dead in the neighboring country. The guards must have taken me to my bed while I somehow fell asleep in your room. I cursed myself as I pleaded with all my heart that they didn't use this chance to bury your body.
I slammed the door against the expensive wood of the wall as I gasped in horror at the sight of the empty bed.
"Oh, your Highness." I gritted my teeth at the familiar voice. "Good mornin-" the raven didn't finish his sentence as I clenched onto the collar of his shirt.
"What have you done to Kaoru?!" I screamed at the advisor's face. "Where did you put him? Give him back to me this minute!"
"I apologize, your Highness." Kyoya spoke coldly. "But I didn't touch a single hair on Kaoru-sama's head, neither do I know what happened to him."
"Why you bastard..." I was about to plant my fist into the face of the head advisor when my arm was held back.
"Your Highness," Tamaki spoke from behind me as he held my arm from behind me. "Kyoya is telling the truth. He didn't do anything to Kaoru-sama. I was there with him when we carried you back into your room. You were sleeping on Kaoru-sama's bed and there's no trace of his body anywhere. We had searched the entire castle, including the halls, the library, the gardens, the rooms and even the restrooms. But there is no sign of him anywhere."
"You..." I let go of Kyoya's collar as I pointed at the blond with a shaking finger. "You're lying..."
"Please believe me, your Highness. That everything I said is the truth."
I pulled my arm from Tamaki's grasp as I started running around the castle. "Kaoru!" I shouted across the corridors as I kept charging forward, ignoring the maids and servants in my way. "Kaoru! Where are you, Kaoru?" No. No. This can't be. I don't want the same thing that happened in my dream. "Kaoru! Kaoru! KAORU!" I screamed your name at the top of my lungs as I ran down the stairs and into every room I pass by. "Kaoru, please come to me!" I begged as I ran into the garden. "Come back here... I need you... I want you... please...Kao..." More tears ran down my cheeks as I feel my legs disappear from underneath me. I collapsed onto the ground on all fours as tears streamed down my face. "Why, Kao?" I sobbed, for the first time in forever not minding the fact that I'm crying in public. "Why must you do this to me...?" My voice trembled as I continued to cry. "I hurt you. I lost you. And now I cannot find you..."
I bawled like I never did before. And the weather seems to have the same mind as me as it started pouring and thundering.
"Kaoru..." I stared up at the sky as the rain washed away the tears on my face. "I'm so sorry..."
I closed my eyes as lightning started flashing across the dark sky.
"I'm such a terrible brother to you, Kaoru... And now, even if I want to make it up to you I will never be able to do that..."
Tears rolled down my face along with the rainwater as thunder cracks overheard.
"I wish... none of this has ever happened... That I am given a chance to show you how sorry I am... and how much I love you..."
~Owari~
A/N: Sorry! I can't help it! This story has been haunting me like forever and I can't study or do anything without suddenly daydream about this story and then I get all emotional and stuff and people were just staring at me with this face that says 'why are you crying over maths/whatever subject I was doing then?!' Then I'm like 'OMFG! I'm getting all emotional about something that doesn't even exist! ( the story, I mean )'
Well, now it does, and if you guys out there who are reading this didn't flood your rooms yet, something is wrong!
Be sure to keep this story on Alert because there is going to be a sequel to this story, ( Do you honestly think that I'll just let the story end like this? )but don't be expecting it anytime soon. School is going to be hell for me for the next two years. It will most likely be published somewhen around the end of next year.
Notice how I never wrote anything about how Haruhi felt about all this? Well, because I don't think Haruhi will give too much of a damn if any of this DID happen. I don't know what she's like in the manga, but judging by my knowledge of her in the anime, I really don't think she will actually do much in this sort of situation. Besides, harem stories are always illogical... And I'm sure as hell Bisco Hatori didn't give too much of a fuck about the character development and shit even though OHSHC is like revolving around characteristics and all...
To those people who are waiting for the next chpt for 'World Without you' ( I really hope there is people out there waiting for it, I really do... ), I'll still be taking some time before posting the next chpt. I wonder if this one-shot will be enough to satisfy your thirst for good HikaKao stories until I get the time I need to write the next chpt for WWY...
Forgive me if this story is too OOC for you and please drop a comment on your way out!