This is my first FF so be nice!

Hmmn... Right okay, this is a Twilight um... parody, this is just the way I'd expect a sane person to interpret the situation . Wrote in Bella's pov.

I'm riding down to the Airport with my mom, it's seventy-five degrees and I have the window rolled down apparently mom's car doesn't have air-con which is surprising as we live in Phoenix (so the weather is usually hot), correction

I did. I'm wearing my favourite shirt, I'm not going to bore you with a description, don't worry.

I'm going to be living with Charlie, that's my dad if you were wondering, I guess I call him Charlie cause we're not that close which isn't shocking when took into consideration that my mom ran off with me before I could walk or talk leaving Charlie behind.

I guess it's been difficult since then; he only got to see me in the summer holidays I used to stay with him for a month, which is until I had a fit about having to go to that hideous town.

So instead now Charlie has to make the effort to see me!

And now it's that hideous town Forks I'm headed for. "Bella" I turned my head towards my mother, I haven't told you what I look like, but she's the same, except older, "yes?" I answer.

"You don't have to go, you know... ha! That rhymed!" did I mention my mom is a total bimbo?

So this is how it is, she gets this new boyfriend, Phil, and he's this football wannabe, right, or maybe baseball, so I get that I'm not her top priority I mean ripping a child away from her father, who is actually a pretty nice guy because Forks is a little boring, cold, wet ... you get the idea so she could go live in California doesn't scream perfect mom material but now she wants to put Phil's non-existent career in front of my education and well being.

Well no! Bella Swan is a burden to no one! Seriously I'd rather go this with my dopey dad than drag myself around the country.

"No, it's okay, I want to go" I lied through my teeth, "Tell Charlie I said hi", I'm sure he'll appreciate that hollow gesture coming from the woman who practically stole his only child! "Okay, sure will!" I smiled.

We hugged goodbye and I boarded the plane and slept the whole four hour flight. It took another plane from Seattle airport to Port Angeles, and I was not surprised by the fact it was raining, I'm pale I'll fit in here.

That's it for now folks :] Please R&R, and I'll make sure to update faster ;D