Author's note: O.K. for those in doubt I want to make clear that I don't own Harry Potter in any shape or form (I guess I wouldn't publish my drivel here if I did)
This story contains some moments of Narcissa's life - as imagined by me. I do think that she reconciled with Andromeda after the war. However, this is not only about her relationship with her sister but I also threw in some other little snippets here and there.
I'm horribly bad when it comes to punctuation no matter which language. So I hope there aren't too many mistakes in there. (I will not be held responsible for any bleeding eyes)
XOXOXOXOXOXO
Sisters
„Mother won't like it that you're wearing that dress, Cissy. It's for special parties only." Andy said, shaking her head.
"Why do I get to wear my prettiest dresses only on special days? A petulant 6-year old Cissy asked.
Eight- year old Andromeda just shrugged, she wasn't really sure, she just knew that that was what her Mother said.
"Will you braid my hair Andy?"
Andy sighed and started brushing her little sister's hair. Cissy's hair was blond and straight unlike the dark mop of curls she and Bella had. Every time she had to brush her hair, she wished it was straight like Cissy's.
"Which ribbon do you want to use today?" Andy asked.
"The one with the pink butterfly." Cissy answered eagerly, it was her favourite.
"Are you girls ready?" They heard their mother call from downstairs. "If we don't want to be late we have to go now."
"Just a second Mother." Andy called while securing the pink butterfly in her sister's hair.
They went downstairs to find their parents waiting and a very displeased looking Bella.
"I don't want to go to see uncle Orion and aunt Walburga and their new baby." Bella grumbled. Babies are stupid and boring, you can't do anything with them."
"Be quiet Bellatrix, I want you on your best behavior today", their mother said warningly.
"I'm starting Hogwarts this year, I don't want to play with babies anymore." Bella complained.
Mother sent her a glare.
"I think babies are cute." Cissy said.
"Of course you would, you're one yourself." Bella answered.
"That's enough Bella." Their father said.
"What are you wearing Cissy?" Her mother said, after finally having a good look at her youngest daughter.
Cissy wore a white tulle dress with pink flowers. She had only worn it once so far, to a wedding.
"I like this dress, I want to wear it today." Cissy's lips began to quiver dangerously.
Before her mother was able to start a tirade, her father intervened: "Leave her Ella, even if it should get dirty or ripped it's nothing that magic won't be able to fix." Cygnus couldn't stand to see his youngest daughter cry or upset, she had him tightly wrapped around her finger.
"That's not the point", Druella sighed, "oh we don't have time for this, we're late already." With that she took some floopowder and pushed one daughter after the other in the fireplace.
Cissy was slightly afraid of her aunt Walburga. She always seemed upset and ranting about something. She preferred to stay out of her aunt's way.
Today however she was excited to see her new cousin Regulus. He was only a few days old and she found him utterly adorable. Cissy was beside herself when she was allowed to hold him, and she very carefully held him in her arms and smiled down at him. Andy and her played with their little cousins pretending they were their babies. She put ribbons in Sirius' hair, only for him to have them take out immediately. When they had a tea party he just smashed the cups to the floor. And when he got hold of her doll, he tried to pull out her hair, when that didn't work he hit her against the table. It was then that Cissy realized that boys are utterly stupid and annoying.
So while she and Andy got along amiably with their cousins, for the most part at least, Bella was outside in the garden, sulking. Unfortunately Bella got bored of that pretty quickly and then came in to order her sisters and cousins about.
It was not that she didn't love her eldest sister, but Bella was sometimes a bit mean to them. She would call her and Andy names and take away their things and break them (sometimes unintentionally) and she always wanted to decide what they were going to play. She also loved to make fun of Cissy's love of dressing up and putting ribbons in her hair. Bella called her little princess and the way she said it made it clear that she didn't mean it as a term of endearment. And yet Cissy looked up to Bella, she admired her older sister, thought that she was the smartest and prettiest sister anyone could have.
She also looked up to Andromeda. Andy was very different from Bella. The two of them looked very much alike but personality wise they didn't have much in common. Andy was patient and kind. She loved to read and help her father when he made potions. She would always play with Cissy and braid her hair. The only person who could make her really angry was Bella. So the two of them often fought, and had periods of when they wouldn't speak to each other.
Cissy admired Bella and loved Andy fiercely.
XOXOXOXOXOXO
"Don't be such a baby Cissy," Bella spat.
"But I want to go to Hogwarts too." Huge tears streamed down Cissy's face and she clung tightly to her sister Andromeda, who would be leaving for Hogwarts for the first time today.
"I'm going to write to you every day Cissy", Andromeda said and gently tried to untangle herself from Cissy's embrace.
Her father put his hand on her shoulder and Cissy sniffled into his cloak. "How about we get your favourite ice cream later?" He asked gently.
Cissy nodded, still crying.
With her two sisters in Hogwarts, Cissy got to spend more time with her cousins. She didn't particularly care for Sirius. He was constantly climbing or breaking something, playing in the dirt and even making friends with some of the muggle children from the neighborhood. When his mother found out he played with Muggles, she gave him a thorough thrashing. After that he met them in secret. Cissy knew about it and didn't deem it proper company for a Black, but she didn't rat him out. Andy got along well with Sirius and he absolutely adored her. But then again, Andy had the patience and disposition of a Saint. No, Cissy got along far better with Regulus. He was tolerable at least. He would listen to her when she read him stories and play with his stuffed animals while she played with her dolls. He wouldn't let her braid his hair though, or have tea parties. This only strengthened her belief that boys were absolutely boring and useless even further.
When Cissy got to Hogwarts she was very disappointed to learn that her sisters rather spend time with their friends than her. They also didn't want their baby sister around when they were with their friends. During her first week at Hogwarts she would sneak into Andy's dormitory and sleep in her sister's bed. Andy didn't mind but told her to make friends with the children in her year. Eventually she did.
Cissy was shocked but not really surprised when her troublemaking cousin Sirius was sorted into Gryffindor. Andromeda was simply amused. Aunt Walburga sent him a Howler the next day, which Cissy found a bit in bad taste, she didn't like causing a scene like that. She was even less surprised to watch him make friends with the most obnoxious boys in his year.
XOXOXOXOXO
"Bella, for goodness sake, do something with your hair," Mrs. Black said in exasperation. "Cissy help your sister with her hair."
Cissy started combing and braiding her sister's hair, while Bella just glared at her in the mirror.
They were getting ready for dinner at the Lestranges' house to meet with Bella's fiancé and his family.
"Aren't you excited Bella? You're gonna be married soon. Cissy gushed. "I wonder who I will marry one day."
"Maybe a mountain troll", Bella cackled. Cissy just sent her a reproachful look and tugged at her hair with a little more force than necessary.
XOXOXOXOXO
"I don't want to marry Rodolphus anymore." Bella wailed.
"It is normal to get cold feet before the wedding sweetheart", her mother answered.
"I don't have cold feet, I changed my mind. Rodolphus is such a bore, I don't want to be married to him. It's all a huge mistake. I can't love him. I'm not even able to tolerate him. Please mother, can't we cancel the wedding?" Cissy and Andy stared at their sister, they've never seen her that upset.
"No we will not cancel the wedding. The Lestranges are a wealthy and respectable pure blood family and we will not insult them by cancelling the wedding last minute. You should consider yourself lucky, Rodolphus will have you." Druella's voice was sharp and cold.
"But mother, please…I won't be happy with him." Bella was crying now.
"This is not only about you Bellatrix. The whole family will benefit from this union."
"So I have to sacrifice myself. We don't need them." Bella huffed.
"Don't be so dramatic dear." Her mother replied.
"I will not marry him, you can't make me."
"You will marry him. You will put on your wedding dress tomorrow, put a smile on your face and say I do. Or I swear to you, you will not be my daughter any longer." Druella's voice was cold and her face seemed to be carved in stone.
"But mother…"
"No more of this nonsense, do as I say." And with that she left her daughter's room.
Bella cried while Andy and Cissy slowly moved closer to her.
"I can't…Andy I can't…" Bella cried.
"Shh shhh…" Andy crooned while sitting down next to her sister, rubbing her hand down her back.
"I don't love him Andy…. I'm in love with someone else…." Bella whispered.
Cissy sat down on Bella's other side, running her hand through her sister's messy curls. The three sisters slept together in Bella's bed that night.
The next day Bellatrix Black was married to Rodolphus Lestrange. Everyone thought that they made a striking couple.
XOXOXOXOXOXO
Cissy had been on her way back from the library after a late night study session for her OWLS. She passed by an unused classroom when she suddenly heard a familiar voice. Curiously she opened the door to peak inside and froze in shock. It was her sister Andy her arms around that Mudblood boy from Hufflepuff and she was kissing him. Narcissa couldn't believe her eyes, she felt sick, how could her sister kiss a disgusting Mudblood. Andy jumped when she heard the door opening and saw her sister standing there. After a few seconds Cissy turned and left.
"Cissy wait." Andromeda called.
She kept walking. She was still trying to process what she had seen. She felt like she was in a trance.
"Cissy please." Andy grabbed her arm and tried to stop her.
"What is…Did he…How could you do that?" Narcissa didn't know what to say. Had he given her a love potion, there can't be any other explanation for Andy's behavior.
"I like him." Andy said so quietly that Cissy could barely hear her.
"But he is a Mudblood." Cissy said incrediously.
"Don't call him that." Andy hissed angrily.
"But it's the truth, he is filthy, this is disgusting. How can you touch him let alone kiss him, it's repulsive." Narcissa felt as if she was going to be sick again.
"Do you really believe that? Do you really believe that there is a difference, that Muggles and Muggleborns are less worthy?" Andy whispered.
Narcissa stared wide eyed at her sister. "Of course I do. Magic is what raises us above animals, what makes us human."
"But he has magic." Andy countered.
"He is an abomination, who knows where he stole his magic from. And he was still raised by animals." Narcissa spat.
Andromeda shrank back as if she had hit her. "But you don't know any Muggles, you have never even bothered to get to know any Muggleborns. They are just like us, the same fears, hopes…they bleed just like us, there is no difference."
"Yes there is, the magic makes all the difference, our forefathers were magical and so are we, we're pure. Muggles and Muggleborns are nothing more than animals." This belief was so deeply ingrained in Cissy's mind that she couldn't even begin to fathom what her sister was trying to tell her. She couldn't understand how her sister could allow a Mudblood to touch let alone kiss her, the thought alone was revolting to her, like breeding with gobblins or centaurs.
"Please…you won't tell anyone about this…? Andromeda's voice broke.
Narcissa looked sharply at her sister for a short moment. "No I won't at least not for now, I hope you will come to your senses soon."
With that the two sisters walked back to their common room in silence.
XOXOXOXOXOXO
"I will marry Ted, no matter what you say or do." Andromeda's voice was shaky but she stood her ground.
"You bring dishonor to this family." Roared Cygnus.
"I think we have different opinions on what brings dishonor." Andy replied calmly.
Cygnus looked as if he was going to hex his daughter.
"If you do this you won't be a part of this family any longer." Her mother screeched.
"Please, won't you meet him at least, give him a chance?" Andy begged.
Her mother went on as if she hadn't heard her daughter's plea. "We won't support you, you won't be welcome here anymore, we won't see you. You are dead to us."
Andromeda cried. "Please understand… I love him."
"My own daughter nothing but a filthy Mudblood's whore." Cygnus shouted.
"You disgust me Andromeda." Druella spat.
Andromeda cried even harder, she looked small and as if she was going to break down in the middle of the hall.
"Cissy…please." She sobbed reaching out her hand towards her sister.
But Narcissa just turned and went to her room. She felt betrayed by her sister. How could she choose a Mudblood over her own family? How could she abandon her? Narcissa couldn't understand Andromeda's decision at all …Until she fell in love – finally she understood Bella's desperation before her wedding day and she understood Andromeda's decision to leave her family for the man she loved. She would do anything for Lucius, follow him into hell and back, she didn't know it then but many years later she would.
XOXOXOXOXOXOXO
She knew Lucius from school, he had been a year above her. She had secretly found him quite handsome, but he had quite the reputation as a lady's man and Narcissa was too proud to just be another conquest, so she had never given in to him when he had asked her out.
They met again at a formal Christmas ball. Narcissa had been travelling the year after her graduation from Hogwarts, either accompanied by members of her family or visiting with distant relatives who lived in different parts of the world. Narcissa was beautiful and she knew it, she held herself with a certain arrogance which the Black family was famous for (even Sirius though defying everything his family stood for had inherited that arrogance). But she was more than just a pretty face, she was well educated, spoke several languages fluently, a great conversationalist and in possession of a sharp wit. It was no surprise that she had many admirers. Much to her father's chagrin, who didn't think any of them worthy of his youngest daughter.
Lucius strolled over to her that night, a confident smile on his face and asked her to dance. She granted him two dances and even though he would have loved to monopolize her time for longer, she smiled at him and danced with some of her other admirers for the rest of the night.
Later Lucius would say that he had known that night, after they had danced that this was the woman he was going to marry. She played hard to get in the beginning, because she wanted to see how serious he was about her. But Lucius was nothing if not persistent and soon they were engaged.
Narcissa wished that Andromeda was there on her wedding day. But apart from that she was a happy and radiant bride. She got it all, she married for love and into one of the most influential wizarding families. Her heart went out to her sisters, she would have wished the same happiness for them.
Bella's marriage was a sham, she confided to Cissy that she didn't allow Rodolphus to touch her after they had been married for a year. He disgusted her.
Instead Bella had become obsessed with "the cause" as she called it - and with the Leader. Cissy knew that her sister was madly in love with the Dark Lord and that she was a favourite of his and she suspected that she was his lover. She didn't believe, however, that her sister's feelings were returned.
Bella had wanted for Cissy to join the Death Eaters too. Cissy knew that Lucius was one of them and while she believed in the superiority of pureblood witches and wizards, she was not political herself and she certainly did not have the stomach to torture and kill Mudbloods and Muggles.
Lucius had regretted joining the Death Eaters quite quickly. He had thought that he would gain power and knowledge but instead he was ordered to do his master's bidding like a house elf. That had been a hard blow for the proud man.
Cissy often thought of Andromeda, she didn't dare to contact her though. She knew her family would disapprove and she didn't know what to say after she had behaved so horribly that day when her sister had been disinherited. Bella had almost gone berserk once she learned of Andromeda's betrayal and it was only due to Narcissa's interference that she hadn't gone to kill her sister and her Mudblood husband.
XOXOXOXOXOXO
The first two years of their marriage had been pure bliss. But slowly Narcissa got more and more anxious and impatient because she would not become pregnant. She loved children and she wanted to have two or three and she knew Lucius wanted an heir. Then after they've been married for three years she finally got pregnant – and lost the baby. It was a difficult time and she wished for Andy to be there. Bella couldn't understand why she was so upset, Lucius grieved too but he hadn't carried the fetus inside himself, her mother was a hard woman who never showed any emotions in front of her children, so she couldn't find any comfort there either. During their fifth year of marriage she got pregnant again. She was so scared to lose this baby too. It was a difficult pregnancy and she was confined to bed during most of it. Draco was born two weeks early. He was so tiny and fragile. They kept trying for another child after Draco. She even went to Lucius' friend Severus to ask him to brew her some obscure fertility potion, swearing him to absolute secrecy because she knew Lucius was too proud and wouldn't like anyone to know about their troubles. But after two more miscarriages – with the last one nearly killing her- they gave up. Instead they put their whole focus on Draco. They showered him with their love and protection. Lucius would try to be strict with him as not to spoil him too much - but he would still end up buying him everything he wanted and letting him get away with far too much. When she had to let her eleven year old son go to Hogwarts Narcissa felt as if her heart was ripped out of her chest.
She always felt a mixture of fury, envy and profound sadness, whenever she saw the Weasleys. And she knew that Lucius must have felt something similar. She couldn't understand the justice in that woman having seven children and being barely able to provide for them, while she had only one. She would have given all of her fortune to have another child.
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO
Threatening to kill Draco as a means to punish his father should prove to be a fatal mistake to the Dark Lord in the end. Narcissa had never felt any loyalty towards him. After he had provided Draco with his mission she again went to Severus for help and then she waited and bid her time until that moment when she would able to help bring the Dark Lord down.
Her betrayal of the Dark Lord also saved her family from Azkaban. Their reputation was severely damaged. The Pureblood families who had been on the Dark Lords side weren't impressed with what she'd done, neither were those families on the other side. The only ones who didn't really care one way or the other were those who remained neutral, but even some of those would think of them as opportunists.
During the past year Lucius had become a broken man. The Dark Lord had taken away his home and his wand and threatened to hurt his family. He had felt completely unable to protect his family and it was because of him and his failure that they were in this position. Narcissa had always found Lucius pride and confidence extremely sexy. She had always been a strong woman herself and during that time it was her who had to be strong for her husband and her son. But the women in her family had always been made of steel.
She still loved Lucius but it broke her heart to see what the war and the Dark Lord had done to him. She was also barely able to look into those haunted eyes of her son - the eyes of someone who had seen and done horrible things and what's more she saw guilt in them. He suffered from nightmares and barely ate, he was still far too pale and thin. She hated herself for not having been able to protect her son from it all. Her only hope was that time would –maybe not heal him completely- but at least partially. And yet she knew that they were lucky. They were all alive and they had each other. Other families had lost their beloved children or parents or spouses. She had lost a sister but then she had lost Bellatrix even before she was sent to Azkaban.
Her heart went out to Andromeda who had lost her husband, daughter and son in law. The only one who kept her going was little Teddy who needed his grandma now because there was no one else to take care of him with his godfather still being so young.
The war had changed Narcissa's opinion on many things. After having seen the Muggleborn witch Hermione Granger being tortured and bleeding on her rug and after having learned of the things that girl had accomplished throughout the years and after experiencing that compassionate girl speaking in favour of her and her family in front of the Wizengamot she could no longer hold on to the belief of pureblood supremacy. It had also shown her that it wasn't power, influence or wealth that counted in the world, it was the love that you have for your family and friends.
She had always missed Andromeda ever since she had walked out of their parents' house all those years ago. But she had never acted on it. Now the urge to reconcile with her sister was overwhelmingly strong. She tried to write a letter to her but could not find the right words to tell her how sorry she was.
It was the morning of the funeral of Nymphadora and Remus Lupin. Narcissa fastened the buttons on her cloak with shaking fingers. She had long debated with herself whether it was prudent for her to go to the funeral and then decided that she would go and if her sister let her she would be there for her. She apparated to the graveyard. During the ceremony she hung back. People shot her many glares but she hardly noticed them she only focused on her sister who looked incredibly pale, her eyes red rimmed. It was later after everybody had offered their condolences to her sister and left that she slowly walked up to her.
They stared at each other for a few moments.
Narcissa cleared her throat preparing to speak: "I…ahem..I" , she was barely able to rasp.
Suddenly Andromeda clung to her and cried into her shoulder uncontrollably.
"I'm so sorry…so sorry." Narcissa whispered, caressing her sister's hair, tears streaming down her face.
They stood like that a long time crying and holding on to each other.