Title: My Immortal
By: Rachel Hunter
Summary: The pain one suffers when someone very close to him departs for the Halls of Mandos.
Rating: Angsty. Really angsty. No kidding.
Disclaimer: I do not own LOTR. Sadly, nor do I own Legolas or Aragorn. In my dreams, perhaps.
Author's Note: The friendship between Legolas and Aragorn never fails to amaze me. Here is my first attempt in writing a LOTR fanfiction.
As always, comments and constructive criticism are immensely appreciated.
Go on… read…and enjoy!
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Chapter 1: If Aragorn Should Die…
Legolas knelt down at the body of his closest friend, cradling the human in his arms. He knew he swore that he would not cry at the future king's untimely demise but the tears refused to be held back and now, they flowed freely down the ashen elf's face, dripping onto the calm face of the one in his arms.
"No, no, Estel," Legolas moaned, embracing the human tighter. "No, you cannot die. You cannot die yet, Estel!"
Alas, the desperate plea was futile. Aragorn was gone, never to return. The fact hit Legolas hard and merciless, and more anguished sobs wracked the elf until his body shuddered and shook with the mounting grief.
Legolas was exhausted beyond words but he ignored it. He ignored everything except for the cold body in his arms. If Aragorn was still alive he would be complaining that he could not breathe but he was alive no more and he could not complain and he was already not breathing. The crystal tears flowed faster.
"Estel," the elf began, this time despite the crushing grief there was a hint of anger in his voice. "If you have to leave, I wish that you would just leave. Your presence still lingers here, and it won't leave me alone. Leave, and take your presence with you! Your memories, your smiles and laughter that you leave behind. I do not want them. I do not want anything that has to do with you!"
The elf faltered, and tears ran afresh. When he spoke next, his voice was overcome with anguish. "You are a selfish, self-centered human, Estel. Fancy leaving for the Halls of Mandos without inviting me to come along! You went on your own and left me to deal with the mess you left behind."
Overwhelmed with unspeakable sorrow, Legolas did not feel the agony of his wounds. He did not feel his blood spilling softly from the injury on his side, did not hear the crimson liquid dripping on the dusty cave floor. His whole body ached with exhaustion and pain, yet he did no move to relieve them. These wounds did not seem to heal, not without treatment and medicinal herbs. At least they would eventually heal… but the pain in his heart was unbearable. The pain at the loss of Aragorn was too much. Too much that time, eternal as an elf's life, could not possibly erased, unless… unless the human returned from the Halls of Mandos.
Unbiddingly, memories of the time spent with Aragorn came rushing back. Young Estel crying when Legolas had to return to Mirkwood, young Estel screaming in fear when spiders emerged from the shadows of the forest where he and Legolas intended to take a mere stroll, young Estel gripping the elf's hand tightly as they trekked through the forest for home. The memories of a young Estel always made him smile, despite the tears cascading down his cheeks like a waterfall during a storm.
When Aragorn became an adult he was no different than his younger self, Legolas thought, burying his head into the man's shoulder and sniffled. When he was saddened, it had always been me who reached up and wiped those tears away. When he was in danger, though he rarely screamed for help, it has always been me who shoved him behind my back and confronted whatever that endangered him, and when he stumbled when trekking the forest, it was I who guided him and make sure he won't fall. Now he is lost to me forever, and…
Legolas shook his head weakly, his face wet with tears and the usually vibrant golden hair hung limply at his shoulders. Tried as he might, he could not keep his mind from straying back to a very much alive Aragorn, with twinkling silver eyes and mischievous smile, darkened only during perils. His heart was pure and untainted by darkness, but filled with light and kindness. His inner light brought shine to his eyes and smiles, and hope whenever they felt hopeless. It was said that elves had a glow of their own but Legolas had long realized that Aragorn, a human, had his own glow around himself. Legolas had never told Aragorn about this amazing discovery. Instead, the elf was contented to just watch the faint light enveloping the ranger.
Legolas clutched Aragorn tighter, willing the memories to go away. How could he convey the message of Aragorn's demise to Lord Elrond? To Elladan and Elrohir? To the Fellowship? To everyone else who held the human so dearly to their hearts? How could he bring Aragorn's body back to Rivendell when he had no strength to even stand up? How would he face everyone else, knowing that it was indeed his fault that Aragorn was felled in the first place? Most importantly, how could he live when Aragorn would surely haunt every waking and sleeping moments? How could he live with the guilt and despair that would eventually destroy his sanity and spirit?
Legolas opened his eyes again. Everything seemed to blur and spin, and his head started to throb insanely. He could no longer feel the wounds, for they had gone strangely numb. He brought his head down and closed his eyes with a sigh, still refusing to let Aragorn go despite his weakening strength in his limbs.
He remembered the friendship forged between the two of them. Friendship that was sowed since Estel was a young child. The bond between them was unbreakable as the years passed by. Both were stubborn, yet one would be willing to die for the other, and vice versa. They were closer than the closest of brothers, bond not by blood but by the heart. Adversity, even death would not tear them apart. Legolas embraced the human tighter. Death… Death had claimed Aragorn, and it was all his fault…
Aragorn had died, bringing what left of hope for the peace of Middle Earth with him. Even then, he tried so hard to deny that fact that the ranger was no longer among the living. It was not working. His heart despaired. His soul grieved. Never had he felt so empty, so lost, so lonely.
His head felt heavy. So were his eyes. Blackness edged around his vision, and for once Legolas welcomed the waiting world of darkness. He felt himself slipping, surrendering in to it.
"Wait for me, Estel…" he whispered.
Even as the darkness surged and consumed him hungrily, his grip on Aragorn did not slack.
Soon after Legolas had lost consciousness, Aragorn began to stir.
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PS: Finally! A chapter done! I was listening to 'My Immortal' by Evanescence when I started to visualize Legolas grieving over Aragorn's death. I can't believe it. Usually I try to avoid reading fanfiction on Legolas or Aragorn dying, with the other grieving over it but alas, I actually written about one.
Based on Evanescence's My Immortal. Actually I have posted the first one with the lyrics, but then I realized that a songfic is not allowed (scowls), so I am reposting this without the lyrics. I really hope that it will still make sense without the lyrics.
My deepest thanks to Mrs Huggins. I don't want to take chances, anyway.
(brightens up) I know you readers don't like cliffhangers. I don't like it too but… oh well. Stay tune! Another chapter coming soon!
Hannon le!