Teyla and Ronon were almost at the gate by now and John was covering the rear. Rodney was running at his fastest, he could tell from behind him. He also noticed the fear in Rodney's movements; they were being chased by the Wraith after all.
"Teyla dial the gate, NOW!" Just as Sheppard yelled he saw something moving in the corner of his eye and he stopped, aiming his P-90 at the forest. He watched as a little girl run and not far behind a huge wraith running after her. He didn't think about it twice before running in the direction of both of them.
"Colonel, what the hell are you doing!"
"Rodney, go trough the gate and raise the shield"
"Are you nuts! Well, of course that's just a rhetorical question because you obviously are!" Rodney kept talking till John wasn't visible anymore.
"I should go after him" Said Ronon.
"Maybe you should".
Like sensing the conversation John's voice was heard over the radio.
"Go now!"
"You expect us to leave you here?" Rodney whispered over the radio.
"I'll be there in no time; just go…That's an order"
None of them were convinced but Ronon was military, and he followed orders, and John knew that. They stepped through.
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Elizabeth watched as the gate engaged and waited till her number one team emerged…But they didn't. She was worried, she knew a certain Lieutenant Colonel that attracted trouble like a magnet. After what felt like an eternity three figures emerged and she desperately searched with her eyes for the fourth member, no other than John Sheppard. But he didn't come through.
"Where's John!" She couldn't conceal the concern in her voice.
"He ordered us to go through while he went chasing something, of course he didn't mind tell us what it was, you know him, he's just reckless and selfish, he wouldn't have thought-"
"Rodney!" Elizabeth cut him off, it was obvious all the rambling was because he knew no other way to show the concern for his friend, but she needed to know what had happened.
"He said we should raise the shield. He said he would be here in no time" Teyla wasn't sure if she said that to reassure Elizabeth or herself.
With one look at the technician he raised the shield. And then they waited.
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When John reached the girl, the wraith had her by the throat. He aimed to the wraith's head and shot. But the wraith had heard John coming; it ducked and moved so fast that John could do nothing to stop it when it snapped the girl's neck. If it wasn't for his military training he probably would have stayed there looking in shock how the girl was thrown away. And today, he was very thankful for that training.
He shot at the wraith again to buy some time and get the hell out of there, but the wraith was fast and in a heart beat he was punching John in the chest so hard that he went flying over some bushes. He couldn't let the pain slow him down, that would mean death, so he just ignored it and run as fast as he could to the gate.
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They all stood in the gate room balcony in silence waiting for the arrival of their friend.
Elizabeth looked pale and her heart was tight with worry. Why would he do this to her, why he couldn't just pop up from the gate smirking as always. Her thoughts were interrupted by the technician.
"Ma'am, we have Colonel Sheppard's IDC".
"Lower the shield!"
He stepped through and there was a collective sigh of relieve in the gate room. John Sheppard was home.
"Hey" Was all he said before heading to the living quarters.
"Wait a minute Colonel" Beckett was at his side in an instant "Post mission check, for all of you" He directed the last part to the team who was approaching Sheppard.
John just sighed, he saw it coming.
The team reached Sheppard not saying a word and headed to the infirmary.
Elizabeth was a bit concern by the lack of conversation from John's part, and she also noticed something in his eyes, she couldn't place what it was, but something felt different.
And she decided, after the adrenalin rush was over, she should do some paperwork before the debriefing and headed for her office.
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He was almost inside his quarters when he heard a voice calling his name. It was Rodney, and John knew the scientist wouldn't be gentle, not today.
"What's up Rodney?"
"WHAT'S UP! Are you kidding me!" Rodney yelled to John.
"Not now, Rodney"
It was simple, he didn't want to talk about it, he felt bad as it was, and he knew he would have to give every explanation and detail in the debriefing, so he had about a twenty minutes break from the guilt and burden. As he said that he shut the door behind him with a single thought. John suspected Rodney would be angry and frustrated but for the moment he didn't care, he just wanted to relax and forget about the pain in his chest that wasn't all given by the wraith. He lay down on his bed while replaying in his head the image of the girl being thrown to the ground.
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The debriefing was short and John didn't say a word until he had to explain why he run to the forest. He didn't want to give too much detail but he said what they wanted to hear. And when it ended one Elizabeth Weir was pissed. She wasn't yelling at him nor she was grounding him, but if looks could kill, John would have been dead by now. At the end she asked him to follow her to her office and he did, reluctantly, but he did. He wasn't sure why she was so mad at him, but he wasn't sure if he wanted to find out either.
"What were you thinking, Colonel?" Damn it, she used his rank, things didn't look too good for him.
"I was…" He didn't know what to say, he acted on instinct basically.
"What!"
"I don't know, OK? I just saw the girl and the wraith behind her, she needed help, and I went to help her".
"And did you help her?" Elizabeth knew this was low, and the hurt look in John's face confirmed it, but she was so mad at him. He always did things like this, worried her to the bone and then act like nothing happened, why does he have to be the hero? She needed him to be safe, why couldn't he see that?
"No" He answered in a whisper looking down.
"No. But you still left your team alone, didn't you?"
"They were at the gate, almost in Atlantis…"
"Almost, John."
She was right, what kind of leader leaves his team alone for a girl that couldn't be helped. Damn it. I messed up, again.
"John, you have to understand, you can't save everybody"
"No I can't" I can't seem to save anybody, he thought. "But I can at least try".
" No you can't, Colonel. What are you trying to do? You're not Superman. You want to kill yourself, fine. But there're more people in this base, in your team! You only think about yourself!" She knew she was yelling and she knew she was being unfair, he isn't selfish at all on the contrary, he's selfless, and that was what bothers her the most. Why can't he see he's worthy and loved! Damn it, John.
"You're right. I'm sorry" And with that he left her office, leaving a very shocked Elizabeth Weir.
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The next morning Elizabeth tried to reach John by radio, he didn't answer. She thought he'd be angry at her and didn't want to talk to her so she walked to her office, dismissing the fact that John wasn't answering. By lunch time she went to the mess hall to grab something to eat and saw Rodney sitting with Carson in one of the tables.
"May I join you, gentlemen?"
"Sure, lass"
Elizabeth smiled at the Scot and sat down.
"Have you seen John?" Suddenly McKay asked.
"No, he's probably avoiding me" Elizabeth answered with a hint of sadness.
"He is?" McKay questioned surprised. John was never angry at Elizabeth, quite the opposite.
"I was an….Yesterday, I yelled at him" She suppressed the urge to call herself an ass because they were in a public place and she still was the leader of the expedition, she at least needed some decorum.
"Why, love?" Asked Carson concerned.
"I didn't have the right really….I just did it because I needed to. I needed to know he was there, and I needed to release some of the tension I had…I shouldn't have done it" She said regretfully.
McKay looked uncomfortable, he felt he was getting in whatever John and Elizabeth's relationship was. But Carson understood…He always did.
"Lass, you should talk to him"
"I tried he's not answering his radio, like I said, he's avoiding me".
"No, he's not"
"Rodney, what are you talking about?"
"He's not answering his radio, I've been looking for him all morning. He didn't answer me or the control room when I asked them to call him"
"WHAT?" Elizabeth was even more worried now. God, she shouldn't have yelled to him!