Perspective

Simon wonders, sometimes, how Baz manages to stay alive.

Because Baz is honestly just too attractive for his own good. He's the kind of attractive that gets young men pulled apart in bars. The kind of attractive that makes unsavory heads turn on the streets.

Although this knowledge, of course-it's all gathered from a purely factual perspective, on Simon's part.

A factual perspective that has nearly nothing to do with the fit of Baz's jeans, and even less to do with how he tilts his head, all studied grace, to listen to Simon's stutter. And really truly nothing at all to do with the way his his dark hair falls just so over his shoulders. Seven years stealing pinches of hair products and swipes of combs, and Simon still can't figure out how he makes it look so effortless.

And so the year Baz doesn't come back, the year Simon spends his evenings haunting the Catacombs, the year the room smells less like cedar and bergamot and more like school-issued soap-

It's only natural, really, to be worried, isn't it?

Just because Baz is a beautiful pompous bastard doesn't mean Simon would be glad if he died.

He's not a monster, after all.

Simon isn't, that is. But Baz isn't, either. Not like he used to be. Not anymore.

And it's good that Simon is looking out for Baz, good that Simon's aware of his long, strong legs and his perfect hair and his gray eyes and the way his Watford uniform clings to him, because then he can see how much danger Baz is in. Every day. All the time. Those unsavory heads and bar frequenters, and Baz being torn apart.

When he tries to articulate this to Penny, though, she doesn't seem to understand.

"You've noticed the color of his eyes?" she says, in incredulous disbelief.

And Simon tries hurriedly to explain, once again, why this is a good thing, and the fact that Baz could potentially be dead, and doesn't that worry Penny at all? Just a little bit?

But she just shakes her head and looks at him. Kind of like he's a lost cause. Which really hurts Simon's feelings, because for once, he's actually trying to be a decent human being. He's looking out for Baz.

So he goes to the Mage, and tries again. Because if anyone could figure out a way to save Baz, it would be the Mage.

He says less about Baz's eyes, this time, as that seemed to be the main thing that put Penny off. Instead he tells the Mage about how unsettling it is, having Baz be gone. The scent of his room, and the absence of Baz's clothes hanging over the wardrobe. And he expects the Mage to listen more than Penny did, because he's the Mage and he understands these sorts of things, but the Mage just strokes his little pointed beard and asks him why he's bothered.

"Why I'm bothered?" Simon says, flabbergasted. "Well-he's-he's my roommate, sir, and I wouldn't want anything to-and-and-"

He's in the middle of working himself up to a good bluster (but this time there isn't any Baz to stand there and make fun of him) when the Mage cuts in and says, with an expression like world peace has just dawned upon him:

"I understand completely. It must be unsettling, not knowing where he is or what he's plotting."

And Simon tries desperately to explain that that's not exactly it, not really-Baz could be in actual danger, you know, sir-but it's too late. The Mage has got an idea in his head, and he won't let go of it. He sits back in his chair with the sort of self-satisfied smile that Penny loves to imitate.

"Rest assured, Simon, we have the situation under control."

Which does absolutely nothing to reassure Simon, but it's not like he can waste any more of the Mage's time. So he thanks him and leaves, and he's trudging back to Mummer's House, past the Wood, and fuck, wait-

Now that Baz is gone (dead, maybe, but also maybe not) Simon won't be able to address him about Agatha, and the Wood, and how they were just standing there holding hands.

Simon's forgotten about Agatha.

Perhaps he shouldn't mention that to her. Later on.

If they ever do get back together.

But Baz stole her, didn't he? And that's unforgivable, really. A good excuse not to worry about him. A good excuse to assume, like the Mage, that everyone's got everything under control.

Exactly.

Right.

Maybe the Mage is right, Simon realizes, climbing the stairs to the room. Maybe he is just worried about what Baz is up to. Alive and plotting. He must be plotting. He must be.

Plotting to kill him, and steal Agatha, and Baz really is a monster, isn't he, those infernal gray eyes and perfect hair, and oh, oh-

Wouldn't Simon just give anything to shove him against the wall and kiss him senseless beat him up?