"Babe." Barney gasped, giving Robin a meaningful look. "Hand. Being crushed."
"Don't care." Robin panted in reply, earning a chuckle from the nurse at the end of the hospital bed. "Why did I let you talk me into this?" Robin cried, gripping her husband's hand even tighter.
"I hardly think that Argentinian booze and a lack of a condom can be considered "talking you into this", Scherbatsky." Barney joked. The pregnancy had come as a shock to both of them, and while Barney had been scared that Robin wouldn't want the baby, Robin had been doubly scared by the fact that she did.
They had been back in New York for just three days when reality hit. Robin, whom had been suffering from morning sickness for the last week, had thrown herself on the bed next to Barney. "This nausea is a bitch." she complained, brushing stray hairs out of her face.
Barney, looking mildly amused, raised an eyebrow. "You're still sick?" he asked, concern creeping into his tone.
"Nah." Robin deadpanned, "I've just been puking like a busted fire hydrant for the hell of it."
Barney cut her a look, but otherwise ignored the snark. "It's been a while now, though." he reminded her unnecessarily. "Maybe you should see a doctor."
Robin nodded distractedly, focused on keeping down the bile rising back up. "Good idea." she muttered as she bolted back to the bathroom, hand clapped over her mouth.
The appointment had been made for the next morning, and a still-sick Robin reluctantly pushed herself into a cab. "You really didn't have to take off work." she said, not for the first time, as Barney scooted into the seat next to her.
He gave the driver the hospital's address and shrugged, taking Robin's hand. "It's no big deal."
Robin smirked at his attempted nonchalance. "If you really believed that, you'd have gone to work today." she pointed out. Barney threw her a look, then turned his head to stare out the window.
"Anyway," Robin continued, "You shouldn't be so worried. I'm sure it's just food poisoning or something. Maybe from the Thai restaurant we went to in Venice."
Barney winced. "Yeah, let's stick to ordering Thai food from, you know, Thailand." he paused, glancing at Robin for a moment. "But still, I feel completely fine. You'd think we'd both get food poisoning if that's what it is."
Robin grinned, easily brushing it off. "You're just paranoid." she promised him.
In the doctor's office later, Robin was seated on the examination table with a nervous Barney clutching her hand.
"Dude!" she whisper-yelled at her husband, "You have seriously got to calm down." The nurse had ran some tests, and, after reading over Robin's file-and getting a peculiar expression on her face-made an immediate excuse to leave the room. She'd been gone for at least twenty minutes, and Barney's nerves were beginning to get to Robin, too.
Now, Barney was gnawing on the nails of his free hand. "It's fine." he said unconvincingly, jumping to worse-case scenarios in his head. Robin glared, feeling more anxious as the clock to her left ticked on. Another three minutes passed before the nurse finally returned, with a familiar face behind her this time.
"Dr. Sonya?" Robin and Barney chorused, sharing an bewildered look. The redheaded woman gave an awkward smile, which automatically told them that the news wouldn't be great.
"Hullo, Mister and Missus Stinson." The doctor greeted with her heavy accent. "So nice to see the two of you again."
Robin, despite her nervousness, had a moment of enjoyment. The last time her and Barney had seen this woman was during Robin's pregnancy scare all those years ago. She had awkwardly corrected Dr. Sonya for addressing Barney as Robin's husband, and it appeared that they had come full circle.
"Why exactly are we seeing you again?" Barney asked before his wife could, more loudly than intended due to his worry.
The nurse stepped forward to explain. "After taking the blood tests, I wanted Dr. Sonya to double check the results..." she faltered for a moment, "Seeing as she's familiar with your case."
Robin's face twisted in confusion. "My case?" she repeated, her voice going up an octave. "You mean my- infertility?" Robin couldn't remember if she'd ever said it aloud like that, if she'd ever called it by name. The nervousness knotted her stomach up, and suddenly she felt sick again.
Dr. Sonya hesitated. "That's right...Except it's not." Seeing Robin and Barney's lack of understanding, she continued: "Your test showed that you have hCG in your blood. Human chorionic gonadotropin- also known as the pregnancy hormone."
Robin and Barney shared an incredulous look. The next second, they both burst into laughter.
"Good one, Doc." Barney said once he'd calmed down, wiping faux tears from his eyes. "But that was a bit of a stretch."
"Yeah." Robin agreed, equally amused. "Nice try, but we all know I can't be pregnant." But as she caught Dr. Sonya and the nurse's shared glance, Robins nerves returned, tenfold. "I can't be pregnant." she said again, less confidently.
Dr. Sonya hesitated. "Actually...You are." In response to Robin's alarmed look, she quickly explained: "In some rare cases, women with your same condition have been able to conceive."
Robin felt Barney's hand squeeze hers. She looked at him and saw the question in his eyes, wondering if she was alright. Robin shook her head minisculely, and Barney addressed Dr. Sonya now. "Could you give us a sec?"
The doctor nodded, ushering the nurse out before following and closing the door behind her.
"Okay." Barney said slowly, stepping in front of Robin. He took each of her hands, trying to get her full attention. "I know you're freaking out, but it's going to be fine." Robin's eyes were wide, and she found herself unable to speak as Barney continued to try to ease her concern. "We'll ask Dr. Sonya about it, and go to a clinic right after this appointment. We'll, uh, handle it, Scherbatsky."
Robin found her voice as Barney's meaning settled in her mind. Her words came out very quietly. "By 'handle', you mean an abortion."
Barney gave her a strange look. "Well, yeah." Misinterpreting Robin's horrified expression, he added: "Don't worry, we'll make sure it's safe first."
"You-" Robin shook her head. "You want me to have an abortion?"
"It's what you want-" Barney replied, clearly confused.
"No." Robin muttered. She moved her eyes from the tiled floor to look at Barney. "I don't want that." As she said this, Barney's expression went blank, like a slate being wiped clean. But then he was smiling.
"You're saying..."
Robin mirrored his smile, but it was wobbly around the edges. "We're having a baby."
Barney hugged her with such enthusiasm he lifted Robin from her seat. "We're having a baby!"
Contrary to everything that Barney and Robin had read or otherwise heard about pregnancy, it hadn't been the last months that were the hardest, but the first few.
Robin was adjusting to the idea of being a mother very slowly and uncertainly. She still had her doubts, but the one thing she knew was that, inexplicably, she wanted this baby. Robin had always been so sure of her plan: her job came first, marriage was optional, and kids were definitely a no-go.
But it seemed that-like in so many other aspects of Robin's life- Barney changed everything.
This man, from the very beginning, made Robin reconsider things she'd believed all her life. Barney had challenged Robin's ideas that dating friends could never work out, that people couldn't change, and that love and career could never go hand-in-hand. Barney had made Robin want to be a wife, and now, even a mother.
She was still scared as hell, and a little unsure, just like she'd been before their wedding. But the important thing, Robin had come to discover, was that the right person could change it all.
As the months went on, though, she'd even become excited by the prospect of being a mother. The idea of raising a person that was part her and part Barney was bizarre and wonderful. Robin had never loved someone like she did Barney, and having a baby only symbolized that all the more.
They began shopping constantly, eventually unable to pass We-B-Babies without stopping in. Robin had finally wore Barney down enough for him to purchase the maple leaf onesie on the grounds that it was unisex, and that "the baby will be three-quarters Canadian, after all."
The real joy, though, had been during a particular doctor's appointment. Barney and Robin walked-and waddled-into the room the nurse led them to, tightly holding hands. The two of them were giddy with the prospect of finding out the baby's gender.
"It's gonna be a boy." Barney stated when the nurse left them. "I can feel it."
Robin, easing herself onto the table, scoffed. "Well if you can feel the baby, then I guess I did all this for nothing, huh?" she said sarcastically, gesturing at her round middle. Barney grinned.
"I'm just saying that I can tell we're having a son."
"No way." Robin protested confidently. "She's totally a girl."
The doctor came in then. "I think I'll be the judge of that." she joked, gesturing for Robin to prop herself up on the seat.
She did as directed, and Barney moved to her side to retake her hand. The sonographer applied the clear gel to Robin's stomach, causing her to jump slightly. Robin vaguely recalled Lily telling her how cold it would be.
As the nurse explained the process, Robin and Barney only half-listened, anxious to know what gender their baby would be. After a moment, the doctor moved the wand-like device over Robin's abdomen. A soft womp-womp sound filled the room. "And there's the heartbeat." the doctor explained. Robin thought she sounded wistful, though she must have done this a million times.
"Sounds good." Barney said, but his voice wavered a little, ending more like a question. He was as nervous as Robin was to know if the baby was healthy.
The doctor laughed good-naturedly. "It is." she confirmed. "Your daughter is perfectly healthy."
Barney nearly choked, squeezing Robin's hand. "It's a girl?" she asked, disbelief clear though she'd predicted as much.
The doctor smiled, giving them a firm nod. Robin looked up at Barney, and she was certain he was trying to keep his tears back. Robin wasn't as lucky, however, and felt a few drops escape the corners of her eyes. The doctor excused herself, giving a final smile and congratulations. Once the door had shut, Barney laughed giddily.
"Dude!" he yelped, pointing at Robin. "You're totally crying!"
She threw his hand away from hers, attempting to wipe the tears away. "Shut up. It's pregnancy hormones." Seeing Barney was unconvinced, she hit his arm. "You're crying." she muttered.
Barney smirked. "I can't wait to tell everyone that you cried." he said deviously. Robin glared, but the mood changed quickly. Barney took her hand again. "We're gonna have a daughter."
Robin smiled, eyes still misty. He talked big game, but Robin knew he'd secretly been hoping for a girl, just as she had been. Barney, who'd spent nearly all of his adult life taking advantage of women, would show their daughter how to see through any boy's tricks. And Robin, who'd grown up believing that "girl" equaled weakness, would make sure their daughter knew the opposite. They both had a lot to make up for, and a lot to teach.
"How to ride a bike."
It was later, still in the hospital room, and Barney and Robin finally had some time for just themselves and Ellie. They were playing a game of their own making in which they listed all the lessons they had for their baby.
Robin looked at Ellie thoughtfully. "How to shoot a gun."
"How not to piss off mommy." Barney joked in reply. Robin smiled in return, and Barney was suddenly sincere. "To never give up on family." he murmured, and Robin knew that he was thinking of his father.
"That sometimes parents are wrong." Robin offered, because the mood had become somber. Her and Barney were both quiet for a while, all their attention on Ellie. Eventually, Robin spoke again. "You know, I was thinking." She glanced up at an expectant Barney. "Having a kid doesn't have to ruin our lives."
Barney laughed. "Glad you think so, Scherbatsky. And you say it with such delicacy."
Robin rolled her eyes. "I'm serious." she insisted. "I always thought that a baby would make things worse, but you know what?" She paused to smile at her husband. He looked particularly amused. "I think it'll only get more awesome from here."
AN: After writing Penny's birth scene in The Heart's Memory, this one was inevitable. Ideas for it just kept coming to me. I tried to write it in a way that wasn't too out of character for Robin, because I (personally) never really saw her and Barney having kids. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed!