I'm sorry

I'm sorry. I can't be serious. I just get these ideas and I just HAVE to write humor stories! I've only written two non-humor ones, and people seem to like them, but I just CAN'T!!! You've got to understand ::breaks into strange hysterical sobs::

Anyhoo have you ever noticed that Voldie (OMG I love that name! Voldie, Voldie, Voldie!) never gets any respect at all? This is his story

NO RESPECT! NO RESPECT AT ALL!

Harry was staring into the beady, red eyes. His entire body was riddled with hatred, he was shaking in rage and this new feeling seemed to be swallowing him up whole he couldn't give in, he shouldn't give in, but eventually he had to break from the icy stare to draw his wand.

"That's it, Voldemort! This is IT! Either I kill you, or you kill me, but whatever happens, I will NEVER turn to the dark side!" and he raised his wand.

Poor Voldie.

"You killed my parents! You have made the past seventeen YEARS of my life completely miserable. YOU'RE EVIL AND YOU KNOW IT! I DON'T KNOW WHERE YOU WENT WRONG, BUT RIGHT NOW, ALL I KNOW IS THAT I HATE YOU MORE THAN ANYTHING IN THE WORLD!!!" Harry roared. His breath was coming in great gasps now, and he could hardly stand it. He was ready to say the Avada Kedavra' curse, but he noticed that Voldie wasn't doing ANYTHING! Well, except for the fact that TEARS were welling up in his eyes!

And then, he spoke, "It's not easy for me, you know! Being evil and all, I mean. Sure, I have my followers, but do you think they last? Do you think they actually like me?!" Voldie was sobbing great sobs by this time.

"You'll never know what it's like! You'll never care! Do you know my real name? It's not Tom. Its HERBERT!!!!!"

Poor Voldie was hysterical by now. Tears streamed like waterfalls down his cheeks and he was practically screaming.

"I envy you, Harry Potter. I want to be you! All I want is a little respect! And it's SOOOO hard to keep a reputation these days! It's so hard to be evil, so hard so hard to be ME!!!"

Harry put a comforting hand around Voldie's shoulder.

"Aw, Voldie, I never knew! I'm sorry! I'm sorry about all those times I tried to kill you, too. And all the times I made you disappear. Poor Voldie!"

Voldie buried his face into Harry's chest, still sobbing.

"Wanna get a coffee? Huh? We can go over to the Dunkin' Donuts across the street, how's that sound?"

"Yeah," said Voldie. "Yeah, I'd like that!" His face lit up and hand in hand, he and Harry skipped merrily across the street.

Gilderoy Lockhart came out the Dunkin Donuts and ran across the street.

"I am a starfish," he said, smiling stupidly.

HAHAHAHA!!!! Sorry, I just had to include that please R/R it. It wasn't very long, so please just take several more moments to review it, ok? And do remember, no flames, because Mrs. Norris is a cat, not a phoenix.

~~The Norris