A/N: Hi, team! Cute little one-shot here in time for Christmas! I've been working on this for about a year but never finished it. I'm close to finishing Educating Eren, so have some festive enjoyment here until then. Much love. Merry Christmas!
This had Eren written all over it.
It was just so Eren.
Typical Eren.
Classic Eren.
As Levi stands in the hallway outside the shiny wooden door of their shared flat now, there's an atmosphere, even from the hall. Everything from the uncharacteristic stillness, and the hushed bickering and shushing from behind the door, to Eren's astonishing performance over socks this morning; everything was screaming 'surprise party'. Not to mention the obscure text half an hour ago telling Levi to get milk on his way home, even though Levi knew they had enough milk in the fridge to supply a small army.
But none of this fazed Levi anymore. He'd learnt early on in their relationship that Eren was jumpy, hyperactive, and just an all-round human Labrador. However, this week really set the standards of Eren's usually overzealous personality. The kid was constantly on edge, checking his phone, and every time the intercom buzzed, Eren practically flew into the hallway.
He was so painfully unsubtle.
But Levi had played along; he might be a Scrooge, but he wasn't a spoilsport.
Eren's problem, however, was that he was a terrible liar.
"Where are you going, Eren?" Levi had called from the living room two days ago, when Eren was trying to sneak out unnoticed, but instead had managed to trip over his own feet, staggering into the coat stand, and knocked Levi's beloved antique to the floor.
"N-nowhere!" Eren called back from the hall, cringing at the loud noise.
Levi rolled his eyes from his spot of the sofa where Eren couldn't see. "Then why are you leaving?"
"Fresh air!" Eren poked his head into the living room, the tops of his ears beginning to blush a tell-tale flushed pink.
"Eren, it's almost midnight." Levi dryly responded, enjoying toying with Eren. Of course Levi knew why he was going out. But Levi was bored. And it was too much fun to watch Eren squirm.
"Yeah but you know me, Levi! I just love a good midnight walk!" Eren babbled, chuckling nervously and rubbing the back of his head.
"Eren."
"Yes, darling?"
"How long have we been together now?"
"Hm." Eren's brows furrowed in thought. "Five years."
Levi nodded. "Correct. And we've lived together for three of those years."
"Ye-es," Eren said uncertainly.
"And in none of those five years have you ever once said; 'gosh, Levi; I just really fancy a lovely midnight stroll'."
Eren gulped. The tops of his ears turned a more violent shade of pink.
"I'm going to the pub with Armin!" Eren attempted guiltily. His ears practically glowed ruby red.
Levi couldn't resist. "You're having an affair, aren't you?"
"NO." Eren's entire face flushes indignantly, the colour in his ears lessening with him telling the truth.
"I'm just fucking with you," Levi waved a dismissive hand. "See you later, okay?"
"Bastard." Eren growled, screwing his face up in irritation.
Levi gave a dry chuckle. "Come here." He held his hand out and Eren begrudgingly slunk into the living room, the glow from the Christmas tree in the corner made Eren's eyes a warm green, and softened Levi's usually harsh features. Levi tugged Eren down to the height of where he sat, and kissed him. "Love you."
Eren's frustration had melted away with the kiss. "Love you too."
…
But now, two days had passed, and here was Christmas Eve. Eren had been highly strung since the moment they'd woken, but was having a rare moment of calm, sat at the glass kitchen table with Levi.
"Le-vi," Eren singsongs suddenly, pausing from looking at his phone.
"Ye-es?" Levi mimics distractedly, concentrating on an article in the newspaper.
"Why do they call it 'Boxing Day'? Is it because it's the day when everyone's Christmas spirit and goodwill runs out and they start punching each other?"
Levi looks up slowly from his paper. "Not yet." He mutters dryly.
Eren hums thoughtfully in response and seems satisfied with this answer, falling silent again.
After a moment, Eren's phone vibrates and he shoots out of his seat, racing into their bedroom.
This is such normal behaviour that Levi doesn't even react.
Five minutes later, Eren comes charging back in. "I NEED SOME SOCKS." Eren demands, skidding to a halt in front of Levi, aiming for nonchalance but missing. His eyes are alight with stress, excitement, and a touch of insanity.
Levi doesn't even look up from his newspaper from his seat at the kitchen table. "Then go put some on." Is his deadpan response.
Eren is momentarily defeated. "I lost them."
Levi moves only his eyes to look at Eren, a single eyebrow raised. He clears his throat. "You lost them." He repeats, flatly.
"Yeah. Uh. I leant them to Jean." Again, Eren's ears are beginning to blush. Levi settles down for the entertainment, even folding away the newspaper, and leaning back in his seat, arms folded.
"What," Levi begins piously. "All of them?"
Eren grits his teeth. "Yes."
"Oh of course," Levi says wryly, looking amused. "How could I forget Jean Kirstein and his many, many feet."
"HE WAS COLD AND A FRIEND IN NEED, LEVI. I COULDN'T LET HIM FREEZE. HE COULD HAVE LOST A TOE," Eren wails dramatically, on the brink of a full on Oscar-worthy meltdown. These are truly the moments that Levi treasures.
"Sure," Levi concedes. "So if I go into the bedroom now, and into your sock drawer –"
"YOU STAY OUT OF MY SOCK DRAWER," Eren blurts guiltily.
Levi's eyebrow rises even higher and the corners of his lips tug in amusement. "Eren, we've been together long enough for you not be ashamed at me seeing the sordid contents of your sock drawer."
The colour in Eren's cheeks isn't from lying at this moment.
"I – just need socks. I need you to buy me some socks. Now." Eren stutters, unable to look Levi in the eye.
"And why can't you buy socks for yourself?" Levi asks innocently.
Eren really hates his boyfriend sometimes.
"I NEED YOUR IMPECCABLE TASTE WHEN IT COMES TO FOOTWEAR," Eren states loudly, trying to distract Levi's suspicions with flattery. "Also you told me last year if I wore the socks with the LED light-up Christmas tree on them to dinner, you were breaking up with me. And do you know, I'm in the mood for some snazzy and whimsical Christmas socks." Eren adds slyly. Dread flashes in Levi's eyes trying to work out if he's bluffing or not.
The risk is too great.
"Fine, you irritating brat," Levi eventually growls after ten seconds of grey and green eyes fixated on each other in a silent stand-off. "I'll go out and get you some damn socks."
Getting to his feet, glaring at Eren the entire time, Levi huffs as he shrugs on a thick woollen jacket and wraps a red scarf around his neck.
"Right. Bye then," Levi says finally, hands deep in coat pockets, his nose and eyes visible from the scarf wrapped over his lower face.
Eren beams and steps close to Levi, adjusting his boyfriend's scarf and jacket. "You're the best," Eren croons, dropping a kiss on the tip of Levi's exposed nose.
Levi narrows his eyes. "Don't push it."
Eren remains cheerful. "See you later, babe!" He opens the door for Levi, all but pushing him out of the door.
…
So now here he is, stood outside the door of his own apartment with a shopping bag of socks, steeling himself, ready to go in. Levi sighs. Better to get it over with.
He pulls out his keys and clears his throat loudly to make sure they know he's there. There's suddenly the distinctive sound of Eren's version of whispering. "EVERYONE SHUT UP," Eren says in an exaggerated whisper. "HE'S HERE."
Levi rolls his eyes as he puts his keys into the lock, hearing everything go very suddenly quiet in the apartment. He turns the key and pushes the door open into a black room.
"Eren," Levi says, playing along. "I'm home."
The light is suddenly turned on, lighting up their living room with all of Eren's friends, Erwin, Hange and Eren jumping out from behind the sofa, armchair and even the kitchen.
"SURPRISE!" They chorus, releasing party poppers and blowing on whistles.
Brightly coloured streamers have been hung up everywhere, and there's a makeshift banner reading 'HAPPY B'DAY YOU MISERABLE BASTARD!' with some silver helium balloons which make the number '106'.
"Wow," Levi says flatly with a slight smile. "I am so surprised."
Eren bounds over and throws his arms around Levi and plants a sloppy kiss on his lips. "Do you love it, Levi?!"
Levi unwraps his scarf. "I really do, thank you, everyone. But who was in charge of the balloons that insinuate that I'm turning 106?"
Wordlessly, everyone points at Hange who sighs. "Snitches get stitches," she says in a chillingly manic voice. The gang gulps. "Happy early birthday, Levi," Hange also comes over to hug him. "I know you hate surprises but Eren was insistent."
"Why does that not surprise me?" Levi says, turning to his boyfriend who is glowing with happiness.
"I wanted to do something nice!"
"I made you a cake," Sasha totters over on 5-inch heels, balancing a cake precariously in her hands.
"Thank you, Sash," Levi says warmly. He looks at the group and feels a surge in his chest. Is this what normal emotional people call affection? "I'm, uh," he clears his throat as they look at him expectantly. "I'm not one for speeches, or surprises, or anything. But thank you lot for this. It means a lot."
Eren has a hand on his heart. "That was beautiful, Levi."
"Has he ever said anything like that to you?" Reiner asks, a beer already in his hand.
"Nope," Eren grins. Levi scowls.
"Let's party!" Hange announces and everyone cheers, Jean immediately flicking on the speakers.
Mikasa heads over to give Levi a kiss on the cheek. "Happy Birthday!" She says with a smile.
"Cheers, Mika," Levi says.
"I did try to reign him in," Mikasa lowers her voice as Eren busies himself with getting two red solo cups of bright green punch from the bowl on the table. "He wanted us all to dress as elves and cover the apartment in fake snow but I told him you'd probably have an aneurysm."
"You'd have been right," Levi says. "But thank you for attempting to control him. He's been a nightmare for weeks."
"I know," Mikasa rolls her eyes. "He's been driving us all mad, too. Connie and Jean started plotting ways they could sedate him."
"He's just so …" Levi and Mikasa watch him chatting animatedly with Ymir and Christa. He tries to use his hands to gesticulate but sloshes one of the drinks down his shirt. Ymir laughs so hard she cries.
"Painfully unsubtle?" Mikasa offers thoughtfully.
"That's the one."
They laugh companionably together. Eren trots over and hands Levi the cup with liquid still in it. "Here you go, babe!" He says happily. "I need to go and change."
"Eren certainly knows how to throw a party," Erwin has come to join him now with a bottle of beer.
"He does," Levi doesn't argue. "And what was your role in this, Eyebrows?"
"I brought the beer," Erwin says.
"And who is responsible for the banner?"
"Me!" Annie joins in the small circle. "Sorry, Levi."
Levi shrugs. "Pretty spot on."
"I did try to make her not call you a bastard," Bertl comes to stand next to his girlfriend, one hand around her neck. "Happy Birthday," he clinks his solo cup with Levi.
"Thanks," Levi takes a drink and makes a face. "Holy shit," he grimaces. "What's in this?"
Hange and Armin exchange conspiratorial smiles.
"Blame Marco," Christa says.
"Not sweet Marco," Levi says, mildly horrified.
Marco smiles from across the room.
"So come on then. What's in it?" Levi asks him.
"A bottle of vodka, a bottle of gin, a bottle of Apple Sourz, and edible glitter," Marco says piously. "Don't look so upset, Levi. Sasha helped too."
Sasha shrugs. "The glitter was me, nothing else."
The door to Levi and Eren's suddenly opens and there stands Eren proudly in an elf costume. Levi visibly pales.
"Mika!" Levi says indignantly.
Mikasa holds her hands up. "I had no idea he was planning this."
"Well a surprise party wouldn't have been complete without a genuine surprise!" Eren announces. "Happy Birthday to my wonderful boyfriend! I shall now perform a lap dance!"
"Oh no you don't," Levi strides over to Eren and pulls him down to his level. "Later," he mutters with a kiss.
Eren grins. "I knew you'd come around to the elf costume eventually."
"You look ridiculous."
"But cute?"
"I refuse to comment."
Eren looks at the group. "And now, gang. We party. Hard."
The rest of the night passes with music, shit dancing, and mystery punch. For someone who adamantly claims to hate both his birthday and surprise parties, Levi didn't half look like he was enjoying himself.
When the clock struck midnight there was a ring of "HAPPY BIRTHDAY" for Levi and "MERRY CHRISTMAS" for each other, and a round of tequila was poured.
Everyone lost their steam at around 2am and crashed in the living room with blow up mattresses and an assortment of blankets and pillows. Eren and Levi had stumbled into their room and collapsed onto the bed together in a flurry of drunken kisses.
Eren had stripped off everything but his elf hat and moved down Levi's body. He have grinned at his boyfriend.
"Now for the first gift of your birthday."
Levi had gasped.
Maybe he could learn to tolerate his birthday after all.