'It's like being in love;
you rob your own mind,
and defile your bed'
"Ugh," Alfred let out a groan. "something smells like shit." He turned on his heels to face the Russian, giving a smile, arching a brow. "Oh, it's just the commie bastard. Hey there, big-nose." Ivan simply smiled and ignored his comment, silently plotting the American's demise.
"Privet, you capitilist pig. Maybe the thing that smells like shit is you, da?"
Alfred's smile didn't at all look friendly, it looked cold and ridged, giving off more of a menacing aura, though it twitched, as he let out a laugh. "Oh, are you so sure about that, you godforsaken alcoholic?"
Russia smiled at the American man ignoring his coldness. "Quite sure." He laughed, shaking his head.
"I guess that big nose of yours really is for looks only, because it sure seems you don't have a sense of smell." Ivan's smile slowly slid off his face beginning to form into a small frown
"What is it you wanted Alfredya?"
He smirked, seeing the other frown, oh how that boosted his pride. Though he quickly frowned, glaring slightly. "I don't know, you tell me. My boss said I had business with you to attend to or some shit..."
The russian man stopped to think, trying to remember any business he could possibly have with the other nation that he forgot, when nothing came to mind he just looked at the American and shook his head.
"Business?"
Alfred looked a bit irritated sighing. "Oh god damn it all..." He shook his head disapprovingly. "I'll give my boss a call, and see if he can tell me what this 'mystery business' is." He slid his cellphone out of his pocket, pressing speed dial, holding the phone to his ear.
The russian man nodded and stood there staring at Alfred, waiting to find out what the 'business' could possible be.
Alfred's face dropped hearing his boss pick up the phone. "But-sir! I've hated the bastard for sixty years and we've been fine! Yes... He's right here.. And look at all the fucks /I/ give! I don't-. . . Fine, yes, sir. I know, sir. I will do my best." He closed his phone, sighing as he slid it back into his pocket. "He said I need to get on better terms with you."
Ivan blinked multiple times, slight shock on his face as the words set in. "Need to get on better terms? Why's that..?" He trailed off furrowing his brow in thought trying to figure out the point of something like that.
He shrugged. "Hell if I know, something about people still being paranoid we'll blow each other off the face of the Earth," he muttered quickly and quietly under his breath. "not that I would mind that..." Alfred returned to his normal tone. "But, what the boss says goes."
He sighed quietly and shut his eyes for a moment in thought, before opening them again quickly. "How are we going to do that..?" Ivan muttered to himself before turning his attention to the American again.
"Like I know, I hate you just as much as you hate me." He sighed shaking his head. "We just need to look civil in front of people, I guess, because, I'm not going to become you friend."
Ivan nodded slowly "Good, I didn't want to become your capitilist pig friend anyway."
"Ex-act-ly." Alfred shot a glare towards the Russian. "You are really a detestable person, Russia."
"I could say the same for you Alfredya." He crossed his arms over his chest.
"I seem to have more friends then you." He spat with a smirk. "At least the people I call my 'friends' are scared of me!"
Ivan swallowed thickly. "So? I don't need friends.."
He rolled his eyes lightly, snorting arrogantly. "Yeah, of course, is that why you always are practically begging people to become 'one' with you, because you are a lonely mother fucker?"
He glared at America. "..."
Alfred gave a tight smirk. "Hit the nail on the head."
"Who would even want to be friends with you! No one even likes you!" Ivan began scowling and glared at the floor.
He shrugged casually. "Can't I say the same thing about you, communist bastard?"
"I know people hate me. They're scared of me, they SHOULD be scared of me. Fear is my ally, Alfredya. Much like General Winter.." He looked up from the ground and back at the american.
"Then why do you hate 'General Winter' so much, Ivan? Why do you still hope people will finally say yes when you ask them to become one? Why do you still believe those empty promises when your bosses promise you the world?" He asked tilting his head a bit to the side.
He smiled lazily. "Why not? General Winter is horrible but an ally, he helps defeat enemies. One day people will say yes, just wait. And-" He moved his arms back to being crossed across his chest. "You or I don't know if thoose promises will come true. I could have the world, you could too but your too much of a blind idiot to see that, Amerika."
He smiled, looking dead on at the lavender-eyed nation. "Well I've realized a long time ago that I had the world on a string, sadly I had to share it with someone." He let out a sigh, shaking his head. "Sadly, that someone was you."
Ivan went quiet for a moment looking back down at the ground, then suddenly he jerked his head up to look at the American again. "See Alfredya? We could have the world together, or then I could wipe out your capitilist country and have it all to myself."
"Like hell I would give up the world to you, Ivan." He paused for a moment, chuckling a bit. "I feel like I'm being tempted by the devil..."
"So," Ivan smiled slightly. "Does that mean you will rule it with me?"
Alfred pondered for a moment. "So, this is what my boss was aiming for..." He let out a snort. "Tell me, Ivan, why would I want to rule the world with you, if I could have it for myself?" He asked smiling, a dark intention or two flickered behind his blue eyes.
The russian man's lips twitched slightly almost into a smile. "Don't be stupid Alfredya, either of us could wipe the other out if it came to that so it would be a game of chance, da? But if we did it together, we'd be stronger and even if anyone tried, we'd own this world and no one could take it back."
He gave a calm smile, watching the other carefully. The expression looked quite out of place on the blonde's face. "This may all be true, but it wouldn't be very 'heroic' of me if I teamed up with you."
"Da, but does being the 'hero' really suit you Alfredya? Is there really anything behind that, having the world would also be very un-heroic." Ivan returned the careful watching back to America, even if it was only for show to him.
His calm smile, grew a bit into a more amused, but twisted smirk. "Now, tell me this, Ivan. Why don't you just aim to wipe me out and take it for yourself? Why do you want me to team up with you?"
Ivan shrugged casually. "I have my reasons for that, Alfredya."
"And if I said yes, your reason would be my reasons too, so spill it." America gave a wide, grin towards the other.
The russian tilted his head down and shook it a bit, "Nyet, Alfredya. It's a personal reason that does not concern you."
He dropped the smile, arching a thin brow. "Alright, though what would be the terms of 'ruling with you'? Would this be a strong alliance or, something else?"
Ivan nodded again. "Da, it'd be a strong alliance, considering I don't know your 'something else'."
He shrugged. "Just wondering, I was making sure this wasn't one of those, combine counties, or become one with Russia things..."
"We'll have all the land once this is complete, I don't need yours." He smirked at his new thought. "For now..." He muttered the last add on quietly so the other nation couldn't hear it.
"Hmph, Russia, I would not let you have all the land to yourself..." He smiled calmly, at the lavender-eyed nation. "Why do I feel like I'm going to get a knife in my back if I say yes to this?"
"I assumed as much Alfredya, but even if devided we will get enough land." He smiled at the blonde. "A knife in your back? Only if you do something that does not please me."
"Isn't that on a daily basis though, Russia?" He smirked though shook his head. "Why not, I suppose this may work. Plus, China has been increasing in power lately, this does not please me at all. So, I will take this deal of yours."
Ivan smiled, pleased with himself. "Bolʹshoĭ, that's great. Soon this will be our world.."
He chuckled a bit. "Ah, Arthur isn't going to be happy about this... Probably no one will, though, I suppose it doesn't matter. It will be our world soon enough..."
"Now that we have all of that out of the way, I think we should celebrate with drinks. To our future world." Alfred smiled, his voice slick like oil. "Would you like to do out, or do you have a few nice bottles of vodka here?" He glanced around Ivan's office a bit, letting out a slight sigh.
"I have Vodka here of course, what type of russian doesn't?" He moved over to where a desk stood and pulled out two bottles of vodka from under it and then handed one to the american. He let out a scoff, taking the bottle from Ivan.
"This makes me wonder what you do when you are actually supposed to be working."
"I work, vodka is my fuel so I need it here." He popped open the bottle and took a big drink of it.
"I have a hard time seeing someone work when they are intoxicated..." He rolled his eyes, biting off the cork and spitting it to the side, before taking a large swig. Alfred swallowed roughly as the burning liquid went down his throat.
Russia just shrugged and took another large gulp of vodka.
Alfred, shrugged it off also, sitting on a smaller sized couch, patting a spot next to him for Ivan to come sit, as he took another drink. He walked over and sat next to Alfred on the couch.
"That's better," He said while pulling the bottle away from his lips. "Ivan, what are we going to do if people try to fight back. Blow 'em up? Or just break their will in every way possible?"
The russian stopped to think for a second. "It'd be better to break their will. What would be the point of taking over destroyed land?"
Alfred nodded slowly, taking another swig from the bottle. "Good point... Hrm, I wonder why we didn't think of doing this sooner..." Probably because back in 1945 the American was actually very strong on his morals of right and wrong. That changed just a /wee/ bit after the Cold War, and 9/11. He let out a sigh. "Let's say goodbye to any remainder of sanity we have tonight."
"Why do you say that, Alfredya?" The russian man asked.
"Because, I've seen a lot of good men go bad from power, and that's one country. We'll have the whole world."
He chuckled lightly, taking a drink from the vodka bottle. "You know, I've never really played the villain. Is it more fun than being a hero, Ivan?"
He smirked. "Da, it's more fun since there's no rules unlike being good."
"Sounds too good to be true..." He shook his head in disapproval. "Too late to reconsider now." He took one last drink of the first bottle, finishing it, setting it to the side. "I probably should stop drinking now, but..." He looked over at the Russian. "Mind if I crash here tonight?"
Ivan shook his head. "Nyet, I dont mind. You can sleep here."
"Alright, that means I can drink till I'm shitfaced." He smirked holding up two fingers. "Ready for bottle two?"
He took the bottle, giving a slight head nod as he popped off the cap, taking a drink. "I think this stuff gets better the more you drink it..."
"It's always good though, da?" He opened the new bottle and took another of his large drinks from it.
He shrugged. "First drink can burn sometimes, but after you drink it for awhile, it makes your body feel all warm." Alfred took another large drink from he bottle, starting to feel a buzz setting in. Ivan shrugged also as he swished his bottle of vodka wathing the liquid inside.
"How you doin' over there, buzz setting in yet?" He took another drink from the bottle, leaning back on the couch a bit."Well, fuck, seems like I'll get shitfaced first if we keep this up..." He let out a laugh, taking another drink of the liquor.
"I could have told you that before we started Alfredya."
"Hey, I can hold my liquor better than some." He shot a slight glare, taking a drink.
Alfred let out a sigh, finished the fifth bottle. "Erm... Another." He shook the empty bottle like there should have been more in there. "You sure you aren't feeling just a tad bit buzzed?"
Ivan went back over to the desk, repeating the process of getting the american another bottle of vodka for the sixth time. "Da...Well, maybe some.."
"I'm surprised you can hold your liquor so well... Erm... Not really, that was a lie.." His words slurred together, taking the bottle from the other.
He laughed a little as he sat back down. "What happened to being able to hold your liquor well?"
"Ah.. I probably still could, if I started drinking with you again. I kind of, cut back on drinking a lot because I said I didn't want to end up like you.." He popped open the bottle taking a swig.
Ivan raised an eyebrow. "End up like me?"
"An alcoholic bastard who can't even get drunk unless he drinks like a barrel." He sighed, taking another drink.
"A barrel? That's a bit much of an exxageration, da, Alfredya?" The russian smiled at him, then finished off the bottle he had been drinking from, quickly getting up and replacing it with a new one.
Alfred looked up at him for a moment, swishing around the remaining liquid in the bottle before swallowing it. "Next." Though paused staring at Ivan for a moment or two. "Ivan, I've been thinking, and stuff."
He grabbed another bottle for the American before returning to his spot and handing the vodka to him. "About what Alfredya..?"
"Why me? Why not China? He supports communism and is rapidly growing in power, yet you wanted to make an alliance with me. I don't get it." He said, sighing, popping open the bottle.
He stopped to think. "It is true China is rapidly growing in power, but I still find you...Stronger, I suppose? Nyet, that's not it..." He stopped again, taking time to think about his words before saying them. "Well...I don't know. An alliance with you just seemed more appropriate, da?"
He scoffed, taking a drink. "You ask the one man who doesn't fear you, no, detests you." He pulled the bottle away from his lips. "I wonder why I said yes if that's true though..."
Ivan simply shrugged and took a large drink from his bottle.
Alfred leaned forward, resting his forehead in his palm. "I feel dizzy..."
"Da." He chuckled a bit "Drinking does that to people."
He glanced back at the other. It took too much effort to glare. "Peh..." He sat up straight, teetering a bit, finally giving up and collapsing on the other's shoulder. "Damn, I need to start drinking again."
Ivan smiled at him. "Or not drink so much when you do."
Alfred scrunched his face a bit, trying to push himself off the other though realizing that required effort he just growled a bit. "That's not as much fun though."
Ivan laughed to himself and shook his head lightly. "Well then, we just have to do this more often, da?"
"Something like that..." He sighed, taking another drink. "Plus, I think it's natural we'll be seeing each other more often now that we have this little alliance set up." He chuckled a bit. "People are going to question why we look to be on good terms though."
"Let them question that then."
He smirked weakly. "You really don't give a flying fuck about everyone else, do you?"
He gave the other nation a blank look. "Should I?"
He paused for a moment and pondered. "Not really, I mean, yeah they are my friends, but, I guess their opinions really don't matter."
Ivan smiled calmly. "See? They can think what they want and question want they want but it really means nothing."
"Coming from the man who has experience being judged and questioned by others I'll believe you." He looked up at the violet-eyed nation, smiling calmly. "I never did really payed any heed to what other's thought anyways..."
The russian raised an eyebrow. "For someone who used to always claim about being the hero, you sure seem inconciderate, da?"
"Well, Ivan my dear, I had realized something a long while ago." His words were slightly slurred but he looked to know what he was saying. "Hero or not, when the whole world practically hates your country you learn to not really care what they think."
Ivan nodded slowly. "I see your point, Alfredya."
"Mmmn.." He nodded, letting out a sigh, just letting his head rest on the other's shoulder.
Ivan blinked and looked at the other nation on his shoulder.
"Are you tired or something, Alfredya?"
He paused not responding for a moment. "I think I'm going to be sick..."
Ivan quickly pointed the american to a trash can "Please puke there and not on me."
He groaned, pushing himself off of Ivan, bending over to grab the small trash can. He let out a hacking sound before vomiting into the trashcan. Ivan watched as the other nation puked in his trashcan, raising an eyebrow during the whole thing.
"Oh that's not pretty..." He made a disgusted look on his face, placing the trashcan on the floor. "God damn... Russian Vodka.. I used to be able to drink that shit like it was fucking water." He was folded over for a moment or two, holding his stomach before leaning back on the couch.
"That's what happens when you stop drinking, da?" The russian asked as he moved his gaze from the trashcan to the american who was back on the couch.
Alfred groaned. "Yes, now shut up."
Ivan laughed silently and leaned back. "If you want, Alfredya." Within minutes, Alfred was asleep.