The morning sunlight crept through the open curtains and onto the bed, slowing waking the brunette who was sleeping on the left side of the bed. As she gained more consciousness, her pain intensified. Her ribs ached, her delicate skin bruised, her brain felt swollen, but amongst the pain, she felt a warmth next to her. An overstretched arm clung to her midsection like a seatbelt, relentless to give any leeway even as the brunette began to stir.
As she inhaled deeply, she was caught in a swell of emotion, was this real?, Paige thought to herself. It had been two days since the kidnapping. Two days of police interviews, hospital visits, relentless questioning, two days of staring into eyes that bore nothing but guilt and unwavering pain. Emily had been relentless about not leaving her side, but Paige questioned whether it was from guilt or her need to protect her. Something had definitely changed within Emily and Paige could see it, but couldn't put a finger on it. There were so many factors, so many aspects of their lives that added to the hurricane of chaos they were both experiencing, not only were they teenagers with typical problems, they had both looked a very certain death in the eye. As Paige laid processing, her physical pain began to become unbearable, she needed her pain killers, but did not want to wake Emily. Laying there for several more moments, she finally decided to move, but unbeknownst to her Emily was already wide awake.
Lying in bed, clinging to Paige was the only thing that felt real to Emily. Feeling Paige's pulse and hearing the rise and fall of her breath, sensing her body heat against her own skin was the only thing that was grounding Emily to reality, the only thing that was keeping her from floating away into the depths of her mind. How could I have let any of this happen? she thought to herself, a reoccurring statement that played like a broken record in her mind, how could I lose her? Silent tears began to fall onto her pillow for the fourth or fifth time that morning.
As she continued to cry, Emily failed to realize that Paige had woken up and was trying very hard to move without disturbing her solid grip on her waist. The pain in her chest and back had become too excruciating to continue lying in wait for Emily to wake up and Paige was determined to find relief in her prescription. As she stirred, Paige then realized that Emily had no intention of letting her go.
"Emily" she whispered, in the smooth voice, Emily loved to hear. "Em, I can't move, you have to let go of me a little, I need my meds" Emily moved her arm immediately as to not keep her from getting the pills she needed, and in turn kept from hurting her even more. Paige began to sit up and as she did so Emily quickly wiped her eyes in a hurried attempt to maintain some sort of composure, in an attempt to keep Paige from realizing what she was feeling. And although she believed herself to be successful, Paige had already seen it in Emily's eyes the night before. There was no fooling Paige, she spent years watching Emily, memorizing her physique, studying her emotions; she could write the book on Emily Fields. And although she could write the book, she was unaware of her crying girlfriend next to her until she fully sat up in Emily's bed.
Emily had insisted on staying with Paige, gluing herself to the kidnap victim from the time the nurses had allowed her to see her girlfriend at the hospital. After several rounds of x-rays, the doctors determined that she had several broken ribs, and would be quite bruised from the attack, but was otherwise physically fine. She recounted how she had been knocked down from behind and was kicked repeatedly until she blacked out, only to find herself bound with duct tape in a closet in a cabin, to countless police officers and detectives until she was blue in the face, Emily by her side the whole time. She had developed friction burns on her wrists from trying to free herself from her tight bindings, which were the least physically painful to her, but every time Emily held her hand, she could see the pain in Emily's face.
The girls were transported from the hospital to the police station and once the detectives talked with Mr. and Mrs. McCullers and Mrs. Fields, the girls were released into their custody. Although there was previously a lot of tension between the parents, this was now a time for peace between them and it was apparent that Emily was not going to leave Paige's side. Deciding that it was best for the girls to stay together after such an ordeal, Pam drove the two girls back to the Field's residence. Because of her broken ribs, Paige would need quite a bit of bed rest, and Mrs. McCullers would be by in the morning to check on her daughter.
That was yesterday and Paige hadn't moved from Emily's bed since. Two days. In any other circumstances Paige would have been overjoyed to spend two days in bed with Emily. Although they had only been seriously together for a little over a month, the girls found a familiarity in being together, a comfort in each other's arms, an equally matched passion in each other's kiss. It was two days ago that they had found each other lying across the room on Emily's window seat, Paige promising never to leave Emily's side, two days ago they would have never suspected the tables would be so skewed, so turned.
Paige finally sat up straight against the head board, reeling from the pain and noticed Emily's lying next to her legs, staring into space, puffy cheeks, framing her gorgeous brown that Paige loved so dearly.
"Em, are you okay? Talk to me, you haven't strung together more than three or four sentences in days. Please, you have to say something", Paige pleaded, slowly lying her finger tips to the girl's forehead, brushing aside stray pieces of her hair. What could she say? "I'm sorry Paige the boy I kissed kidnaped you and could have very really killed you?" It played over and over in her head, how could she ever find the words to apologize? How could she explain running to Hannah instead of running to her? Where did she begin? She couldn't bring herself to speak, let alone apologize to the amazing girl sitting next to her.
In lieu of speaking, Emily reached up for Paige's hand and kissed the back it and then gently caressed her own face with the softest skin she had ever felt. She's safe, she's alive, I feel her pulse, I feel her skin, she's alive filled Emily's head, temporarily suspending her melancholy thoughts. Realizing the reason Paige was sitting up in the first place; Emily silently rose from the bed and disappeared through the door, making her way into her bathroom grab Paige's pills.
As soon as she left the room, Paige breathed a small sigh of relief, she's here, she's safe, she's alive. The two were on the same wave length without even knowing it.
It had been five hours since Paige had taken her pills and was slowly waking up again. It seemed as if she was living in a state of clouds for the past few days, the pain had begun to subside in her chest and back, but her bruising had begun to turn deeper shades of purple. It looked more painful than it felt, but she still had quite a ways to go to a full recovery. It would be weeks until she could return to the pool, but more importantly it had been two days since she had even seen water, especially the shower.
Saturday marked a week since her life flashed before her eyes, a week since seeing the girl she was very much in love with risk it all for her, definitely a week from hell. Paige had moved back home to her own bed at the insistence of her mother on the condition that Emily would be welcome to stay with her. Mrs. McCullers had almost taken up residence at the Field's from morning to night, constantly checking on her daughter. This was both a god send, but Paige also an imposition on Pam Fields. Not only were the women sharing meals together, checking on Paige, and bonding over their daughters, they were sharing meals together, checking on Paige, and bonding over their daughters and Paige was not sure this was the way she wanted to introduce her mother to Pam.
Looking around the room, Paige spotted Emily reading in her arm chair, and thought to herself this is straight out of an episode of Gilmore Girls. Sitting up drew attention from Emily, but she gave her space and allowed her to adjust in her bed. It had been a few days since they had an actual conversation besides do you mind getting me a glass of water or good night, let me know if you need anything. Paige knew there was a plethora of things weighting on Emily, but danced around the idea of bringing anything to the surface, she fought the urge to hurt the girl she loved the most by talking about the incident or A and it was driving her mad.
Paige felt good enough to swing her legs out of bed and made her way into her bathroom, being observed silently by Emily the whole time. It was the middle of the afternoon and she knew both of her parents were at work. Mrs. McCullers finally eased up her hovering now that Paige was home, and she trusted Emily to call her should anything go wrong. Emily had in turn moved into Paige's house, sharing a room with her girlfriend, although several guest bedrooms were made available to Emily. Paige's family was much wealthier than the Fields, but often made little reference to it, Nick McCullers serving as a deacon to offset such a prestigious image.
Looking in the mirror, Paige could barely make out the abrasions on her face from where she was tapped. Although they were fading, her hair looked more wild than ever. Paige slowly stripped herself of her shirt and examined her chest in the mirror, she could not believe what had happened to her.
As quickly as the ordeal began, it seemed to last forever as Paige remembered the night. Not only was she ready to die for Emily, she had realized she had never properly told her she had loved her. If I make it out of this alive, those are the first words I'm going to say to that girl. How can I die without telling her that? She relived it, as if she was watching a poorly made-for-lifetime TV movie. She had loved Emily for so long and was ready to protect her as best as she could, no matter the cost, no matter the sacrifice.
It was several minutes later that she realized that Emily had been trying to get her attention, while she had completely spaced out. Emily was now standing next to Paige, draping a towel around Paige's bare chest, asking her if she was okay. "Are you sure you don't want me to call your mom? I don't want you to be having an adverse effect from the pills, you really scared me just now! You were just completely zoned out, I didn't know what to do." Emily was close to tears as she pleaded with Paige.
"I'm sorry Em, I didn't even realize..." Paige responded. Now was not the time to bring anything up, it couldn't be, Paige wasn't ready for the consequences or the potential of losing Emily to guilt. They both weren't ready to bring up the fact both of them could have died, the thought was too fresh, too terrifying.
" I think I'm going to finally take a shower, it's been a couple of days. If I don't, I'm going to have to start dreading my hair, its taking on a life of its own." stated Paige, looking into Emily's eyes. "I'm okay, Em, I promise."
Emily reluctantly left the bathroom and threw herself down into Paige's comforter. I killed someone, Jesus, I killed someone, I killed Nate, Nate killed Maya. The cycle or reasoning began to fill Emily's head. I stabbed Nate. Nate is dead. I am safe and Paige is safe. Paige was willing to die for me. Speaking to me with her eyes, I had never even told her I loved her. Of course I love her, but how could she die without me telling her? So many questions that just staring at the ceiling would not answer.
The hot water beat down upon Paige's fragile skin, she was a fighter, she was strong, but she needed to relax. She leaned against the shower wall and let it all go, the tears she had not been able to shed that night, how scared she was, she was 17, this is not how she planned on spending her senior year of high school. She wanted to go to the movies, skip class, kiss her amazing girlfriend, go to prom; have a normal existence. And at these revelations she began to weep, saline mixing with the drops from the shower head and before she could realize what was happening, Emily's arms were wrapped around her, her beautiful body pressed against her own. She was silent but could hear Emily sobbing behind her, turning around, their bodies clashed into each other. Emily quickly grabbed Paige's face and pressed her lips onto hers with a fervor she had never shown Paige. An ache she needed to quell that only kissing Paige would cure.
It seemed as if they had stood there kissing under the water for eternity. For such a long time there was a disconnect between the two, even if they hadn't been separated in a week. They had watched countless hours of television, seen a million movies, read novels for school, and slept arm in arm, but the silence had been deafening. Until now, Paige wondered if she was losing Emily, but as they fell into a rhythm of deep, passionate, desperate kisses, Paige knew Emily was far from leaving her.
Drops of water hung on Emily's eyelashes and Paige had never seen or felt something so beautiful in her life. There in the afternoon sun, under the baptism of water, the two clung to each other, stopping the world's turning, ceasing the churning of their hurricane. Their hearts connected and beat in sync, Emily rested her head on Paige's shoulder, while the rest of her body trembled, whispering "I love you Paige, I love you so much, I don't think I can even begin to put it into words" into the other girl's ear.