Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, even if I wish I could.

Paring: Kankurou/Shikamaru

Rating: M for language and lemons

Author's Note: UNBETA'D! So, I wasn't planning on starting another story but Kankurou invaded my brain and demanded to be acknowledged.

Read, review and please enjoy!

Neither one of them really remembered when it started or how. But they needed it, craved it. Maybe it had started with just a kiss, or maybe it was more. Either way, it had continued for six months now, and was showing no signs of stopping. It wasn't like they had any significant others to worry about and they had come to a silent agreement that neither of them would date anyone for the how ever long whatever…this was lasted.

They weren't dating, weren't boyfriends, but their relationship was more than just fucking. It may have started that way, but now…something was changing. It showed in how they acted around each other, how their thoughts drifted to each other when they least expected. The way they found themselves more and more drawn to each other, like a moth to a fire even if it was going to be consumed in the very flames that drew it in. His sister had even commented on it earlier in the week. Something about the way they watched each other, but there was something she wasn't telling him, he could see it in the way she watched him watching him.

Kankurou groaned and rubbed at his eyes. He glared down at the papers still sitting on his desk. The damn things never seemed to end, no matter how much spare time he spent in the damned office. He would leave for a mission only to return to more paperwork in his in box. It was like the things mated in the box while he was gone and bam! more paper work. This was one of the things he hated about being the Godaime Kazekage's brother. He had gotten roped into a desk job, which was not something he enjoyed, not in the least. He still went on missions and that was where majority of his income came from. He enjoyed the thrill of a chase, the adrenaline of a battle, but he also enjoyed just lounging around his house, working on a puppet or just reading.

Dark green eyes glanced up at the clock on the wall, almost two in the morning. The thought of going home to a cold empty bed almost made him want to sleep in the office, almost. Huffing in annoyance, he went back to scanning the papers and then scribbling his signature at the bottom. After the long term mission he had just come off of, today to be exact, this was the last place he wanted to be. But it needed to be done and he knew now was really as good a time as any, so he finished up the stack. Making the small pile look neat, he placed them in the already brimming out box.

With his task complete, the brunette stood and stretched with a yawn. He was still wearing his black outfit with his kabuki paint still covering his face, though it was smudged a bit. He picked up his pack and scrolls on the way out the door. Shutting it quietly behind himself was habit, even when the whole building was devoid of people. Gaara was at home, probably reading or meditating. Temari had left hours ago and was more than likely in bed, cuddling a pillow. But the thought sparked a memory and Kankurou cursed under his breath. He had forgotten, Ino was supposed to be visiting this week. Now he had two women in his household to deal with. He was glad it was so late at night, meaning the two of them would be blissfully asleep.

It took a good ten to twenty minutes to reach the large house on the outskirts of the village. His father had liked his space, and that trait had trickled down into his children. Gaara especially, but that could have been just because of the way his childhood had been and the fact that he was the jinchuriki of the Ichibi. The house was large, with plenty of room for the three of them and then some. Kankurou had always wondered why the place was so big, it wasn't like their family had ever been big, at least not that Kankurou remembered hearing about.

The brunette paused to kick of his shoes at the door, and then paced up to the bathroom upstairs. He sat his stuff down at the door to his room, not even bothering to go in. He wanted a shower, a nice long, steamy shower. He felt grimy and the whole sand in his pants joke wasn't even funny at this point. Three days in the desert on his way home without a way to shower wasn't something he wanted to repeat.

So he stripped off his clothing, throwing them in the already full basket near the door. He'd have to remember to do that tomorrow, at least his own stuff. Before long, he was stepping out of the shower and garbing a towel on the way out the door. He wasn't too worried about getting caught padding down the hall naked, from what he could tell, everyone else was fast asleep or at least in their rooms.

Kankurou grabbed his stuff from beside the door and was rubbing at his hair when he stepped into the room. It was now well past three and all he wanted to do was fall in bed and sleep until he had to get up. He sat his stuff on his desk and pulled out a pair of boxers to wear to bed before tossing the towel near the door so he could remember to grab it in the morning. He was about to just fall on his matters when he realized there was already somebody in it.

The brunette froze and stared at the man currently occupying half of his bed. This is what he had meant by things were changing. In the beginning, they would have never just shown up in each other's beds. Hell, they hadn't slept over during the first four months of this. Now things like this were becoming more and more frequent and Kankurou really wasn't sure how he felt about this situation. At least his bed wasn't cold, and it definitely wasn't empty.

Shaking his head with a sigh, he crawled over the body in the bed and flopped down on the side closest to the wall. He doubted he would be the first up in the morning, but he never knew with the man sleeping beside him. The form beside him groaned in his sleep and rolled on his side. Green eyes fluttered open, a hand reaching up to rub at them. Kankurou smiled at the sleepy expression. The man's hair was down, falling around his face. The Sabaku reached over and brushed the hair out of the man's eyes.

"What are you doing here?" he asked after a moment.

"Waiting for you," was the gruff reply, "You took too long." The comment made Kankurou chuckle and he pulled the smaller man into his side, a hand coming up to play with his hair all on its own. An arm was thrown over his chest and a face snuggled into his chest.

"Sorry, I had paper work," he said as way of an apology.

"Shh, sleep," the words were slightly muffled. Within moments, the man was fast asleep. Kankurou threw an arm over his head, stretching the muscles. When had it come to this? What had started as a random fling in his office now consisted of sleep over's and murmured words. What amazed him even more was the fact that he was starting to think he may feel something for the man, and it scared the shit out of him. Never in his life would he have thought he would be with a man, let alone Nara Shikamaru.

Shikamaru groaned as heavy footsteps and familiar giggling woke him up. He blinked up and at first had no idea where he was at. The he remembered returning to his apartment and being unable to sleep. He had tossed and turned for a good two hours before he had slipped on his shoes to lazily make his way to the Kazekage's residence. Since it had only been about ten when he had gotten there, and he could hear voices in the living room, he had opted to knock instead of using a window to sneak into the middle Sabaku's room. Temari had answered the door, and raised an eyebrow at him. He had ignored it and she had said nothing, even though they both knew what she was thinking. He could just hear her, "Only a fling? Yeah, right."

He had slipped his shoes off and placed them in the already full area by the door. When he had went to walk past the living room, fully intent to just lie down in Kankurou's bed and wait for him, Ino had pounced on him, literally. The blonde girl had hugged him from her new position on top of him and Shikamaru had hugged her back, only his hug was more sedated.

Instead of being able to go peacefully upstairs, Ino had drug him in to the living room and made him sit and talk for an hour. When he had finally been released from the woman's clutches, it had only been because Temari had drug Ino to her own room. The Nara was glad the blonde's bed room was at the very end of the hall and far enough away that there wasn't a chance that he could hear them.

As soon as Shikamaru was standing in the dark bedroom with the door closed, his heart had skipped a beat. The odd combination of sandalwood and kabuki paint filled his nose and an odd feeling ran down his spine. He couldn't place it, wouldn't place it. He didn't want to think about the feelings that may be forming within him. This wasn't supposed to be anything more than a give and take, on both sides. But he had recently been finding himself drawn to the older man more and more often.

The Nara had grumbled when he had realized he had worn his sleep pants from his apartment without even realizing it. Temari had to have gotten a kick out of that, he had thought as he crawled into the large bed pushed against the wall across from the door. The brunette then proceeded to snuggle down into the sheets, wrapping his arms around a large pillow. He had taken a deep breath, filling his senses with that odd smell that was solely Kankurou's. It had sent a small shudder through his body and he had rolled over on his back, taking the pillow with him.

He had thought back to when it had all started, completely unable to stop the flood of memories invading his brain.

It had been a full month since he had arrived in Suna as an emissary. He had grown use to the heat, switching to a sleeveless black shirt instead of the turtleneck he usually wore under this flak jacket*. They both had just come back from bad missions and the Nara was in Kankurou's office dropping off some papers when he said something off handedly and it had instantly infuriated the older man. An argument had commenced, name calling and cursing used to each shinobi's full advantage. The turning point had been when the Sabaku had shoved Shikamaru up against a wall, snarling in his face.

It happened so fast Shikamaru was gasping for breath as his hands clinched around the fists Kankurou had made in his vest. He growled back with equal menace and was ready to throw around a few more words when lips had suddenly been on his own. It made the younger man gasp, and the jounin pining him to the wall took full advantage of this, shoving his tongue into the other man's mouth without pause. Shikamaru had struggled for a moment and then the tip of Kankurou's invading appendage ran from the back of his mouth to the front and the traced the gum line behind his upper teeth.

It was like a switch had been flicked. His body instantly relaxed into the other nin and he had moaned rather loudly. The sound seemed to spur Kankurou on and he deepened the kiss even more, dragging his tongue across the chuunin's. He used small flicking strokes against the sensitive skin of the roof of Shikamaru's mouth to leave the Nara shivering and clutching at Kankurou's shoulders. He then proceeded to coax the smaller brunette's tongue back into his mouth and the Nara had blindly followed.

About the time Kankurou had pressed their bodies closer together, a knock on the door sounded, startling both men. Kankurou had pulled back with a start, staring down at the brunette as if he had no idea what had just happened. He then blushed behind his kabuki paint and released Shikamaru instantly. The Nara had sagged against the wall, breathing ragged as his mind tried to figure out what the hell had just happened. He blushed bright red when Temari's voice sounded form behind the still un open door.

The Sabaku was settling back into the chair he had knocked over when the argument began. He glanced up at the still dazed Nara and frowned. Grabbing a towel form a drawer, he tossed it at the chuunin. Shikamaru caught it on reflex and then looked up at the older man with questioning green eyes. Kankurou made a motion around his mouth, which had slightly less purple paint on it than before. Shikamaru tilted his head to the side, his brain unable to fully process much at the moment. When his point wasn't gotten across, Kankurou glared at him.

"Your mouth," the Sabaku said as loud as he dared. That got through the haze and the Nara quickly rubbed at his face. And just in time, since the blonde outside the door had gotten impatient and swung the door open when no answer came. She eyed Shikamaru and he blushed, even though she knew nothing about what had just transpired. He had shoved the rag in his pocket and made a hasty exit. The two men had avoided each other like the plague for weeks after that. But that had been when it all started. That one heated angry kiss was enough to leave them unconsciously craving more.

The brunette was pulled out of all of his thoughts when long arms snaked around him and pulled him up against the larger man who had supposedly still been sleeping beside him. The Nara squeaked uncharacteristically when he felt Kankurou's morning erection press against his thigh. He shoved at the large expanse of chest but it got him nowhere. He could tell the older man was awake by the way he was breathing, which meant Kankurou was doing it on purpose. Shikamaru growled and shoved harder.

Kankurou just snickered, pressing closer. With a little wiggling, he managed to get under the younger man's body. Hands coasted over the Shikamaru's body, sliding up under the thin shirt to trace muscle and smooth over skin. The Nara shuddered. He was still amazed at the effect that the smallest touch from the Sabaku could have on him. He didn't think he had ever felt anything as good as Kankurou's hands on his body, leaving him whimpering and gasping for breath.

Fingers rubbed across pert nipples, drawing a small sound from Shikamaru. Hands fisted in the sheets under them, trying to find anchor when the temperature in the room was on a steady rise. One hand slid down his belly, dipping in the small dip of his belly button before the tips of long fingers slid just under the waist line of his pants. Green eyes shut tight as Shikamaru tried to hold in the noises that wanted to escape his throat as the fingers at his nipple pinched and rubbed, sending shivers down his spine.

Kankurou buried his face in the Nara's neck, nipping at the smooth skin there as he traced the edge of his sleep pants. He tickled over the line of hair that ran from Shikamaru's belly button to his groin before he slid his hand down and into the thin pants the Konoha shinobi was fond of wearing to bed. The man atop him gasped, hips jerking forward when long fingers wrapped around his erection.

Shikamaru's breathing became ragged as the Sabaku fisted his cock, tugging and pulling as he pressed his own erection against the younger man. Fingers pinched hard at his nipple, causing his back to arch and his mouth to fall open with a whimper of appreciation. If Shikamaru could ever say anything about Sabaku Kankurou, it was that the man knew how to play his body like a fine tuned instrument. The older man knew every sweet spot that could leave the Nara shivering and moaning within seconds and he used said knowledge to his advantage.

Then the hand that had been doing wonderful things to his erection was gone and Shikamaru moaned at the sudden loss. He felt hips lift under his body, but the fingers on his upper body were enough of a distraction that he didn't really notice. Then Kankurou's hand was at the elastic of his pants, tugging without saying a word. Shikamaru raised his hips, letting himself be divested of the navy blue material. A soft sound vibrated in the back of his throat when he settled back against his lover only to feel skin against skin.

"Spread your legs," Kankurou murmured in his ear, hand smoothing from knee to hip.

"We can't." It wasn't really a very convincing argument considering it was moaned when the hand tracing his body bypassed his aching erection. But he really didn't want to be walked in on…

"You didn't care about that very much before, Shikamaru," the older man's husky voice sounded in his ear, drawing out his name. The Sabaku knew how much hearing his name from the older man could turn him on, and it sent a shudder through Shikamaru's body. The memories of that incident flashing through the Nara's mind brought a blush to his cheeks.

"I was there too, if you didn't forget," he hadn't, "I remember how hard you came." Shikamaru couldn't deny that fact, but he wasn't going to own up to it out loud if he didn't have to. When he still resisted, the hand that had come to rest on his hip gripped his thigh hard and drew his legs apart. An erection slid between his balls and the crease of his thigh and he gasped loudly. The hardness of the other man's cock slid back and forth against the sensitive skin, causing Shikamaru's hips to jerk at the sensation. Kankurou's breath ghosted over his ear, adding to the overwhelming sensations he was already feeling.

A hand slid up the abused flesh of his thigh to wrap around his cock once again. The Sabaku slid his thumb over the head, spreading the pre-cum that was now leaking from the Nara's erection. Shikamaru squirmed against the older man's body, biting his lip to keep from crying out. The brunette behind him chuckled low in his throat, the hand that had been toying with an abused nipple tracing up the smaller man's body to press his fingers against the Nara's tight lips.

"You'll make yourself bleed," he told Shikamaru as he pulled the lip from his teeth's clutches. Fingers slid into the Nara's mouth, pressing against his tongue and forcing his mouth open. He gasped around the appendages in his mouth as Kankurou canted his hips up against him; he could feel pre-cum against his skin, a sign of the other man's excitement. Shikamaru brought a hand up to fist in the covers near his head, twisting in the fabric as the Sabaku thrust against him as he jerked the younger man off at the same time.

Small broken sounds were falling from his open mouth as Shikamaru shuddered and tried to hang on to sanity. His chest heaved as he panted for breath, each tug on his erection bringing him closer and closer to release. Kankurou grunted against the skin of his neck before he sunk his teeth into the smooth skin to try and muffle his own sounds. The mix of pain and pleasure sent Shikamaru over the edge and his hips jerked forward. He spilled himself across his stomach, coating Kankurou's hand and erection in the process. He knew he had been loud enough to hear, but he couldn't find it in him to care as pleasure continued to coarse through his body.

The Sabaku began to thrust harder against him now that Shikamaru's seed eased the slid of his body against the Nara's thigh. The smaller man felt him tense and then warmth was spreading across his hip and dribbling down his thigh as Kankurou came against him, teeth sinking in deeper into his shoulder.

Shikamaru collapsed back against the brunette behind him as he tried to catch his breath. Kankurou pulled his teeth from the Nara's abused flesh, tongue swiping over the wound to catch the small amount of blood that was pooling in the marks. He pressed a kiss to the mark, letting his hands fall from the body on top of him. His heart hammered in his chest and he could hear a rushing noise in his ears. This was something else that was changing, the way he felt during and after sex. Kankurou ached to hug the smaller man against him as he came down from his high. He wanted the closeness but he could feel fear of it tighten his chest and stop him from actually doing it.

After a few minutes, Shikamaru slid off of the Sabaku to swing his legs over the side of the bed. He pulled open the drawer of the bedside table to pull of the pack of cigarettes he had stashed there the last time he had forgotten his pack at home. Along with the pack, he pulled out a black ash tray and a yellow lighter. Tugging a cigarette from the pack, he placed it between his lips and flicked the flame of the lighter a light. Kankurou watched from where he lay as the shadows of the flame played across Shikamaru's angular face. Then the shadows were gone when he pulled the lighter back and took a deep drag. He paused to look over his shoulder at the still reclining Sabaku before he stood to open the bedroom window with one hand.

The Nara returned to sit on the bed, reclining back against Kankurou. The elder man's hands twitched, wanting to run his fingers through the long hair that spread across his chest. Instead, he slid his arms behind his head. Dark green eyes watched the Nara smoke, tracing the lines of his face with his eyes. Shikamaru glanced over at him before he sat up to flick the ashes into the tray and then bring the ceramic dish back with him so he could recline without having to sit up every few minutes.

"What?' he asked when Kankurou continued to stare at him. The large brunette jerked in surprise.

"Nothing," he said, looking away to stare out the window at the blue sky. He hated feeling like he was walking on egg shells. Emotions weren't supposed to be easy, but the ones that he was feeling now were nothing like the ones he had felt before. He knew what love was, knew what it was supposed to feel like. But the feelings that were rising in his chest scared the shit out of him.

Shikamaru chose to ignore the older man. He wasn't really in the mood to deal with the odd way the brunette man behind him had been acting recently. He caught dark eyes following him a lot more these days. The feeling of those eyes on him made him shiver. He adored the way he felt when he was with Kankurou. He wasn't expected to fill their silences with clumsy words like he felt he needed to when he was with a woman. What conversations they had were intellectually stimulating in a way that he couldn't find often. The Sabaku was even decent at shoji. He rarely won, but he put up a good fight. Those qualities were what had drawn him back to Kankurou after that first awkward kiss.

That, and the need to feel that burning in his belly again. He had wanted to feel those hands on his body again, feel the press of that hard body against the planes and angles of his own muscles. It was a thrilling sensation he couldn't find in a woman's body with all of their softness and curves.

The Nara had already come to terms with the fact that he seemed to like men more than woman. Even before Kankurou, he had found himself watching men more than women, lusting after them more, too. Then Kankurou had happened and he hadn't been able to deny the fact any longer. An aching erection after just one bruising kiss was more than enough proof.

With a sigh, the brunette pushed the thoughts out of his mind. He crushed the butt of his cigarette in the ash tray before moving to stand. He stretched and then pulled a face at the feeling of drying cum on his skin.

"I need a shower," he said, turning to face the man still stretched across the sheets. Kankurou's gaze traced down his body and then the Sabaku smiled, like he was proud of himself. Shikamaru ignored the look and picked up the pair of sleep pants he had worn to bed and pulled them on. He wasn't going to chance someone being in the hallway when he was walking to the shower. Without another word, the Nara opened the door and closed it with a quite clickbehind him.

Kankurou watched the shorter man go. He needed a shower, too. But if he really had to deal with it he would. Shower time was one thing the two men had not shared yet. Each considered the twenty to thirty minutes it took them to shower as time to themselves after their sometimes heavy rounds of sex.

The Sabaku rolled over; burying his face in the pillow Shikamaru had slept on the night before. His whole bed smelled like lemons, cigarette smoke, and sex. It was a heady sent that made the brunette groan. He wasn't supposed to take the time to memorize that smell, ingrain it into his memory, but he did none the less. His heart skipped a beat and he had to push himself up and off the bed.

Kankurou pulled his now dirty sheets off his bed and tossed them by the door. He used the towel from last night to clean himself up as best he could before he pulled on a pair of boxers and then a pair of thin linen pants. A light blue tee shirt followed and he was dressed for the day.

He picked up the pile of sheets by the door along with some of the clothing that had been in the basket in his room. The Sabaku exited his bedroom and made his way down stairs to the laundry room. He could hear the sounds of his sister, Ino and Gaara in the kitchen. It must still be early if they were still in the house, which meant he probably had less than five hours of sleep.

Grumbling to himself about how work sucked, he padded back up to his room. Kankurou could hear the sound of the shower still running as he walked past the bathroom. The sudden urge to strip down and take a shower with Shikamaru made him pause on the way by. He stood there for a good three minutes before he shook off the feeling and walked fast to his room. He shut the door behind him, probably a little too hard.

Dark green eyes scanned the room, the bare mattress of his bed, the desk with his packs, the dresser that stood by the closet. It looked lived in, that was for sure, but it made Kankurou feel slightly lonely. No one was ever really in this room, except when Shikamaru felt the urge to sleep over or basically sneak in. And when the Konoha shinobi had to return home, because he would have to one of these days, his life would be much like his room. Lived in, but lonely to a point. Yeah he had his siblings and a few friends, but he found himself craving something more than just friendship. He wanted to love someone, love them fully and completely. Love them like he may love…

The Sabaku shook his head, running a hand through the messy locks with a sigh. He wasn't going to think about that. He wasn't going to get attached, of all things, to someone who may-was-going to disappear from his life one day. It was the bleak truth of the situation and he wasn't going to let himself get all wrapped up in whatever his relationship with Shikamaru had become. No matter how inviting it may seem.

The brunette made his way toward his bed room closet to pull out a clean set of sheets as a way to distract himself. His movements were slightly robotic as he shook out the crisp navy blue fabric. He remade his bed, tugging the cloth tight across the mattress and pulling the top sheet up over the bottom. He rearranged his pillows to his liking and stood back. He glanced at his bedroom door before moving to his dresser. Kankurou tugged open the top drawer and pulled out an old pair of his pants and then a shirt. He knew he was bigger than Shikamaru but he figured any clothing was better than nothing. So he sat the small pile on the bed and left the room. He closed the door behind him with a small clickand left for the kitchen. He was at the end of the hall and stepping down the first stairs when he heard the bathroom door open behind him. The Sabaku knew better than to look behind him. Shikamaru in a towel was the last thing he needed to see right now.

Shikamaru watched the back of Kankurou's head as he moved down the stairs. The Suna nin didn't pause, or look back. But Shikamaru hadn't really expected him to. It was like an unspoken agreement to try and keep this whole relationship simple. No strings attached. But attachments always grew when you were around a person long enough. Attachments that could cause complications.

With a small sigh of annoyance at himself, Shikamaru moved down the hall and to the bed room. He used the towel to dry his hair as much as he could. I really need a haircut…he thought as he ran his fingers through the heavy mass. He picked up a brush form the desk and tugged it through his hair until he had all the tangles out. With a flourish of movement, his hair was up in its customary ponytail.

Once the hassle of his hair was taken care of, he turned to the bed. Green eyes fell on the neatly folded clothes that sat there. It was then that he remembered that he didn't have any clothes at Kankurou's. Shikamaru picked up the green shirt with a small smile. He hadn't ever actually worn any of the older man's clothes before. There had never been the need. But now he found himself kind of fond of the idea.

He tugged the shirt over his head and got a strong whiff of Kankurou's scent. It made him pause and pull the material up to his nose and take a deep breath. Sandalwood with an undertone of the Kabuki paint the Suna nin always had on. The stuff was a bitch to get out of clothes; Shikamaru knew that for a fact. It was also just a messy as lipstick during a kiss. And it was just a part of what made Kankurou who he was. Shikamaru wouldn't have the temperamental man any other way. Not that Kankurou was his or anything like that…

The brunette shoved down that thought before he could start thinking about it. He tugged on the borrowed boxers and pants, pulling the drawstring tight to keep them up on his smaller hips. Finally dressed, the Nara padded out of the bedroom and down the stairs.

The whole of the Sabaku family, plus Ino, was seated around the large dining table. What appeared to have been a large stack of pancakes was now down to only three. A plate that had once been full of bacon and eggs was now almost empty. Everyone else's plates were cleaned except for Kankurou's, who was munching away at his own small stack of food. The only open seat left was between Ino and Gaara.

Kankurou glanced up as Shikamaru as he made his way toward the seat. The Sabaku quickly looked back down at his food as the Nara seated himself and began piling his own plate. There was something in that look, something sad but hopeful. Temari was eyeing him with something between a smirk and a frown on her face. The oldest Sabaku was way too observant for her own good sometimes. It was like she could see through all the walls you set up around yourself with one long look, and she had been looking at him a lot more often than before.

Ino was chatting happily with Kankurou, while Gaara and Temari talked about work, leaving Shikamaru to his own thoughts. Breakfast was completely uneventful. Kankurou was seemingly unconcerned with the fact that his lover was at the table, ignoring the Konoha shinobi for most of the time. The Nara wasn't sure why that bothered him, but he felt his heart clinch as he watched the brunette across the table laugh at something Ino said. The smile stretching across the man's face did funny things to Shikamaru's stomach.

Kankurou glanced over at him as he talked adamantly with the blonde woman, he grinned at the Nara when he caught Shikamaru staring at him. Shikamaru felt his face flush. He managed to grin back before looking back down at his plate. What the hell was wrong with him? He felt like a teenager, stomach in knots and full of butterflies, mouth going dry and blushing at every glance.

He glanced up to find Temari smiling at him.

"What?" he asked as he pushed around the remaining food on his plate. Her smiled widened and she shook her head at him with a small chuckle.

"I just thought you would be more observant with you being a genius and all, you know," she told him as she picked up her plate and moved towards the sink. Shikamaru frowned as he followed her with his gaze. What the hell does that mean? he thought as he shoved the last of his pancakes in his mouth. Does she mean Kankurou? The Suna nin had been acting a little odd recently, but he didn't know why. He found himself watching Kankurou for the rest of the time he was at the Sabaku house hold, trying to figure out what the hell Temari had meant.

Once everyone was done eating, they got ready to disperse for the day. Ino and Temari left first, heading into town to do some shopping. Which was mostly Ino's idea, but Temari grudgingly agreed. Gaara left for the office even though it was a Saturday. Kankurou walked Shikamaru to the door. As the other nin was about to leave, the Sabaku's hand reached out to hover near Shikamaru's waist. He wanted to pull the smaller man into a hug and kiss him goodbye. But that wasn't how this worked. His hand clinched into a fist and fell back down to his side.

The Nara didn't seem to notice and just waved goodbye over his shoulder with a smile. Kankurou returned the gesture and shut the door as the younger man moved down the walk way. His face fell as the door closed, blocking his view of the brunette. Kankurou pushed a hand through his hair and sighed. He moved to the living room and flopped down on his stomach on the couch. Everything was changing. His feelings only grew stronger every time he saw Shikamaru. He was going to slip up if he wasn't careful… And he suddenly found he didn't care. He wanted the man, wanted him like he had never wanted anything before. He wanted to fall asleep beside him and wake up curled around his warm body. He wanted the luxury of a good bye hug and kiss without having to care how the other might feel.

He wanted so many things, yet feared them all in the same breath. Deep down, he was scared of rejection, but he knew you could never get anywhere by sitting around and not taking chances. If he had learned anything in his life, he had learned that you had to go and make things happen. But fear was a binding thing. And it held him in place on his couch with his face buried in the pillows while he mulled over his new feelings.

Shikamaru sighed as he shoved his key in the door to his apartment. Kankurou's face as he left seemed to be stuck in his head. The Sabaku had looked so hopeful, so happy, and then suddenly sad and broken. The genius didn't get it. Why hadn't the older man just pulled him in for a kiss? It wasn't like they hadn't done it before. Then he remembered why and it made his heart sink a bit. This was simple. No complications…No feelings. But the feelings were there none the less. Shikamaru couldn't deny he cared for the older man. Cared for him more than he cared for anyone else in his life. Yes, he cared for his parents, but the way he cared for Kankurou was different than how he cared for them. But the big question was, did he love the Sabaku?

He had the whole day free with nothing to do. A whole day to sort that question out, then he caught sight of the bird perched on his window ledge. It was a Konoha bird. Shikamaru padded across the room on bare feet and pulled the scroll from the small creature. Green eyes scanned the parchment before sighing and sitting heavily on his bed. It seemed his day wasn't as free as he had first thought it to be.

Three hours later found Shikamaru standing in front of the Sabaku residence. The Nara paused as he walked up to the front door, his fist raised to knock on the door. He glanced up at the up at the windows of the two story building, staring at the window he had opened that very morning. His heart clinched in his chest, but he ignored it and brought his fist down hard on the door. When there was no answer, he tried again, still no answer. The brunette shifted the heavy pack on his back, taking a step back to look into the window. He couldn't make out anyone moving around and considering the fact that no one had answered, he took it all to mean Kankurou wasn't home.

With a dejected sigh, the Nara turned from the large house and made his way toward Suna's gates. He hadn't expected to be called back to Konoha so soon, or so suddenly. But it came with the title of Shinobi. And when something urgent came up, he didn't have the luxury of waiting around to say goodbyes to people, no matter their importance. To tell the truth, Shikamaru had wanted to see the middle Sabaku before he left, had wanted to see the man badly. But he couldn't go looking for him. He would just have to settle for sending a message when he made it home and dealt with whatever he was needed so urgently for. Ignoring the ever worsening pain in his chest and the fast beat of his heart, Shikamaru head for home.

Meanwhile, Kankurou was walking towards the grocery store and still trying to figure out what he was going to do about his current emotional situation, blissfully unaware that the man he was spending so much time thinking about was currently on his way back home to a village that was three days travel from the Sabaku's own home.

"Somehow, I couldn't stop myself.
I just wanted to know how it felt.
Too strong, I couldn't hold on.
Yeah, yeah.
Now I'm just tryin' to make some sense
Out of how and why this happened.
Where we're heading, there's just no knowing.
Yeah, yeah. "

- "Crashed" Daughtry

Author's Note: I have found I have problems writing Shikamaru. I don't know if that means I write his character bad, or what but he causes me problems. :/ Oh well. Hope ya'll liked this and there will be more, I have another chapter in the works. Give me a slice of cake in the form of a review!