Inspired by a cute headcanon/art that tumblr user the-doctor-amanda thought up. Had to write a little something about it.
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At the beginning of Robbie's 8th grade year, he met a girl whose hair fell along her shoulders like vibrant flames and whose eyes were drenched in viridian like the evergreen trees that surrounded his new home. A fierce loner, she pulled Robbie out of his rough shell and showed him that the world doesn't have to be a dark and dreary place. He never stopped resenting Gravity Falls and the circumstances that forced him to reside in this shithole of a town, far away from his home farther south-but with Wendy around, life was a little brighter, and friends were easy to come by.
Steadily, she eased him into her rambunctious circle of friends. He wasn't close to them at first, but enjoyed the company as an alternative to the two years here he'd spent alone and miserable. Robbie could still tell you how uncanny it was, however, that he had almost immediately latched onto the only female member of the group besides Wendy herself-a girl named Tambry.
Tambry, at 14 years old, was definitely a splash of colour against the monotone of the town. He'd recall, when he met her, that her hair was an electric shade of cherry red with black highlights-and it changed at least once a month. She did her makeup in dark eyeshadow and near hieroglyphic patterns, using her face as a canvas and so rarely smiling to show off those dark hues of lipstick that never seemed to crack or fade. Robbie took an intense aesthetic interest in her because her style was so much like what he wanted to be, and while Robbie was an awkward fumbling mess in Tripp pants and Hot Topic armwarmers and Denver sports team graphic tees, Tambry was a scenesque little goddess.
Originally, she'd been intimidating and dismissive when he'd tried to talk to her, but he looked up to that, and made a point to learn those traits himself. He discovered, in time, that she wasn't rude or antisocial, per se-she just had a hard time expressing herself verbally when getting to know someone. So Robbie would pass her notes in 5th period, doodling skulls and explosions on the margins of his notebook paper, and they'd smile and giggle and learn each other's lives through something better than words-physical memories they could hold onto.
When Robbie turned 14 that year, he got his first ever phone, which was kind of a big deal, coming from a poor family on the outskirts of Colorado. His grandparents, being the exact opposite of poor, made sure to spoil him wherever they saw fit to make up for his lack of material possessions as a kid. He didn't use it for much, but thanked the gods that he could now spend all day and night texting Tambry and further strengthening their friendship.
Eventually, she started talking to him, and Robbie would put that up on his list of greatest accomplishments in life.
They'd go to her house (which was down the hill from Wendy's, in a series of log cabins) and sit beneath the christmas lights and song lyrics she'd strewn along her ceiling and painted on her walls. She was expert at guitar, and would help him hone his seriously amateur skills. More often than not, Robbie and Tambry ended up outside on her front lawn, wrapped up in giant winter coats and staring at what little stars peaked through the cloudy Oregon skies. Losing all their facade and momentarily taken by sentimentality, they would talk about life, their dreams, hopes, and simple teenage stuff that seemed like such a big deal. They were, in essence, two standoffish, apathetic people, who turned into dreamers together when the world turned away.
"You know," She rolled over and looked at him. "You don't talk so much about your old city anymore."
Robbie shook his head. "I don't think about it too much. I loved it, but I'm not going back anytime soon. You know that. My mom can't support the both of us."
"Why did she never just, like... ask for money from your grandparents?"
He sighed. "I can't tell you how many times I've laid awake at night wondering that myself."
"You always speak so highly of her, you know? I wonder what would make her have that kind of lapse in judgment."
"I think it had to do with her stupid pride and her fucking headstrong personality. She wanted to make it on her own, without anyone's help... even if it meant sacrificing my happiness. God, I really do adore the woman, but was she really thinking about me at all?"
Tambry smiled earnestly and brushed a lock of neon-blue hair out of her eyes. "I think parents do things sometimes, and they might not always think it through... but in the end, a mother will do whatever's best for her children."
"I guess," Robbie buried his face in his arms.
There was a pregnant pause, and then he raised up his head and broke the silence once more.
"Hey, Tambry?"
"Yeah dude?
"There's something I really need to get off my chest, and you're basically the only fucking person in this town I can trust. That alright?"
"Yeah, lay it on me."
"It's about Wendy."
"Hold up, you know she's my best friend, right?" She shot him a concerned look. "So, if this is like, shit talk about her, it's kind of in the bro code that I might have to tell her."
"It's nothing negative, promise."
"Alright, then, go for it."
"Whenever I'm around her, I feel really weird." He sputtered. "Like, weird. My chest feels all full and it kinda hurts, but not even in a bad way. It's like... when you stub your toe and it's kind of sore but then the pain just ebbs away from that one spot? Yeah. And my tongue goes all floppy and suddenly I can't fucking talk and I make a fool of myself. Like, is that normal? She makes me feel all zombified and weak in the knees and then I want to like, get her name tattooed on my fucking face. It's warm and fuzzy and totally alien and it kind of freaks me out but I can't make it stop..."
Tambry smiled the textbook definition of a shit-eating grin and eyed him devilishly. "Holy shit, dude, you're fucking floored."
"What?"
"Smitten. Head over heels. Completely and totally infatuated. I have more synonyms, if you want-enamoured, enchanted..."
"Tambry, what?"
"You're in love with Wendy."
He tilted his head uncharacteristically, much like a confused puppy would. "That's a scary word. Love? But I've felt that way since the day I met her. That can't be humanly possible, right?"
"Humanly possible or not, you're totally into her!" She kept smiling and playfully batting at Robbie's forearm. "Robbie, you have to ask her out. She likes you a lot, she's always thought you were super cool. You two would be the most nausea-inducing little couple."
"About that..." He fiddled with his hoodie drawstrings. "Have you ever noticed that she, like, never stays in relationships for long?"
"Yeah, thats Wendy for you."
"And she's always the dumper. Never the dumpee."
"So, she has high standards. Big whoop. Those guys barely knew her! I mean, aside from Nate, but he's obviously fucking Lee in his spare time. I'm telling you, Robbie, you'd stand way more of a chance."
"Tambry," He sighed. "I can't. I'm scared."
"Robbie V is scared? Dang, shocker there. Big bad wolf running away with his tail between his legs."
"Big bad wolf doesn't want to get made into a puppy by the pretty badass lumberjack girl," He pouted at her. "I need time to prepare myself for this. You can't tell her, okay?"
"I won't, I won't, you know that. But still, man, how long?"
"I don't know." He shook his head, and looked back at the blinking constellations barely visible above them. "But you'll be the first person I tell."
She smirked, lying back down on the dewy grass next to him. "Gotcha."
o0o0o0o0o
When he was 15 years old, Robbie entered Gravity Falls High School with all his friends beside him, except Wendy. It didn't take a genius to see how miserable he was that single year while she completed the eighth grade. If you asked him about it, he wouldn't be able to describe his freshman year in detail. He'd tell you he remembers wearing a velvet and suede trench coat to school every day, and playing cards in Physical Science 5th period because the teacher was a fat walrus of a man who knew nothing about the mechanics of teaching (or moving, really.) He remembered a lot of rain that year, a lot of flopping on Tambry in an attempt to distract himself from the burning hole in his chest that Wendy's absence left. He remembered always hijacking rides from Thompson (who was a Junior and had his mom's van) to go to Wendy's house and be with her.
He remembered Wendy being sick a lot that year, and braving the testosterone trap that was her home to wrap her up in blankets and feed her soup when all she insisted on doing was playing video games instead of resting. Dan Corduroy had given him the nickname 'Punkass' over time, and Robbie just gritted his teeth and ignored the burly man because he adored Wendy just that much. At the end of every day, he'd text Tambry, and every day she'd ask him when the fuck he was going to finally ask her out.
The texts would pour in her inbox like giddy little journal entries from an elementary school kid;
9/20/10: Wendy and I sat next to each other on the bleachers at her birthday and laughed about the football players misshapen butts.
11/13/10: I just took all three of her brothers at once in a wrestling match, she's looking at me like I'm the coolest dude in the world.
12/10/10: She has the flu and I'm trying to make her stay in bed but she really wants to challenge me to Call of Duty how does she even have this much energy?
12/10/10: Update: She beat me so now I have to stop telling her what to do.
12/15/10: I think Wendy got me sick help I need a fucking priest
2/4/11: I told Wendy like 10 facts about fucking giraffes and she doesn't even think I'm weird or stupid. She's totally into the giraffe facts, man.
2/14/11: Holy shit, Tambry, we're on my couch watching a romcom. ON VALENTINES DAY.
2/14/11: Update: I was just about to confess my feelings for her at the end when the guy got the girl but she turned to me and pulled out this calzone that she got earlier at Sbarro's and just shouted 'DOESN'T THIS LOOK LIKE A DOUBLE VAGINA?'
2/15/11: Update: I flaked and said something about the top part looking like a misshapen football player butt. Next time.
4/26/11: teambry i am rly fufkinf watsed adn i drew a dikc on my face beduaes its GONAN HAPEN ANYWSWAS andn weendy's laffinsg at me she thiks im fufnny!1!21111111 scroe
4/27/11: oh my fucking god my head the screen is so bright why is this happening to me
7/23/11: We were at the parade and she was cold so i gave her my hoodie. we shared it. she kissed me on the cheek, tambry. i don't know if this is real life anymore.
It lasted for months, and months, with the both of them wondering if Robbie was ever going to make the first move. Eventually, they ended up more or less the same people, under the same set of stars, talking about the same bullshit that wouldn't be important in years to come.
"You have to do this before it's too late, Robbie. Eventually she's going to find someone and then you're going to spend forever wondering what could have been."
He ruffled his hair and didn't respond, just made a mild noise of frustration and hid in his hoodie.
"She's out of my league," He finally whined.
"The more you tell yourself that the less progress you're going to make."
He made another pitiful sound and returned to Hoodieville, population: angst.
"Okay fine, how about this," Tambry grinned. "How's about I tell you what Wendy said to me the other day."
Robbie peeked a single eye out of the cotton shield in curiosity.
"I may or may not have made a comment about how her dating life has been mysteriously bland lately," She explained. "And may or may not have had a conversation where she ran through all the possible options for dating and told me her opinions."
Robbie nearly jumped out of his hoodie. "Whatdidshesayaboutme?"
That smirk returned itself to the purple-clad teen's face. "She totally has a weak spot for those tunes you play. Like, I don't know if you noticed, man, but she melts when you serenade her."
The ravenette looked down at the ground with his jaw hanging open, face cherry red. Then back at Tambry, then back at the floor, for several moments in utter disbelief. "Are you serious?"
"Yeah and she totally thinks you have a cute butt."
Cupid had struck Robbie when he was a lost, confused middle schooler, but was now pelting him with white-hot arrows that pumped butterflies into his veins and nudged him hesitantly forward.
"I have to," He choked out. "I have to tell her..."
"Perfect." Tambry beamed. "Alright, V, listen up, cause I'm only telling you this once."
"Yeah?"
"There's a cheapo fair at the Mystery Shack tomorrow, and you're gonna be there, and Wendy's gonna be there, and you're gonna walk right up to her and ask her to be your girlfriend and appease her with sugary treats and spend the rest of the day riding rides like the bunch of cuties you are, got it?"
He took in a breath. "I'm going to awkwardly waltz into the fucking fair like a zombie and trip over my words and not know what the fuck I'm doing."
"No, you are going to be the most charming goddamn zombie ever and take your Living girl frolicking through the wilted flowers of this disgusting teenage apocalypse. Got it?"
He nodded reluctantly. "Alright. I'll try."
"You'll succeed."
She squeezed his shoulder, smiling up at him, admiring how he towered over her. "Robbie, really, you can do this. I'll text you the whole time. Just don't pull your phone out while you're trying to impress her, alright?"
Again he nodded, and the two of them agreed to call it a night.
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6/19/12
Robster: straightened my hair, skinny jeans, vans and signature hoodie. y/n?
Tambry: my god you're such a tool
Tambry: they are not vans everyone knows you wear some cheap off brand
Robster: this tool in off-brand vans is about to hook up with your best friend you better be ready to accept the cold hard truth
Tambry: yeah yeah w/e loser just go find wendy
Robster: yeaaaah, about that...
Robster: ive been kind of stalking her for an hour but dipshit won't lay off
Tambry: dipshit
Robster: the little kid with the weird twin who beat the shit out of those ghosts
Robster: he's literally been talking to her for like ever i cant ask her in front of him all he fucking does is embarrass me
Tambry: fuck
Robster: fuck is right i'm buying ten more snowcones yolo
Tambry: goddamnit rob
Tambry admittedly got pretty nervous when the texts stopped coming.
She had frantically started texting him, even running around looking for him, but to no avail. Upset that he might have given up and left in one of his horrible 'my life is just a dark black abyss' moods, she tried to call him and was met with the usual 'hi you've reached robbie v i can't come to the phone right now, probably because i'm doing shit with my band and raising some hell, leave a message or fuck off-BEEP." Sighing, she closed her phone and resigned to drown herself in cotton candy and prepare for the pep talk of a lifetime.
And then her phone vibrated.
Scrambling, she pulled it out of her pocket, smiling like a huge dork when her eyes crossed over that single sentence.
Robster: the clouds are clearing and the apocalypse is ending
Relief settling in her chest, she merely sent a tiny 'told you so' to him, shutting her phone and holding down how giddy she was. Tambry grinned so big her cheeks were starting to hurt as she, in a brief moment of reconsideration, took her phone out and texted a 'bout fucking time' to Wendy.
At that exact moment, the two of them passed by her, holding hands-Robbie blushing like an exposed virgin and Wendy shooting him a look that screamed I have you wrapped around my finger and I couldn't possibly be happier. Robbie moved his gaze to the dear friend he'd had for so long in this town, and mouthed her a silent 'thank you.'
Tambry simply tossed her purple hair over her shoulder, turned away, and waved them off happily as she strutted away to bum wifi from some uncharted corner of the forest.
Facebook just had to know.