Title: The Bed You Make
Characters: Zuko
Word Count: 536
Rating: G
Summary: Zuko tries to get rid of the doubt and guilt he feels from his decision so he can find some sleep. Spoiler for Season 2 final.
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"I didn't make a mistake, this was the right choice," Zuko whispered to himself. The young prince was laying in one of the beds in the Earth King's palace. Azula had given him this room after a day of having to follow her as she set up the new Fire Nation order in Ba Sing Se. He should have been sleeping but the small voice of regret and guilt had kept in up.
He shouldn't feel this guilty though. Uncle had told him to do want he truly wanted and there was no mistake that all he really ever desired was to be accepted by his father. His uncle may have been able to find happiness in a simple life of a commoner but Zuko found that there was very little he enjoyed about such a lifestyle. He was raised to be a prince, to be someone the common folk just heard about and looked up to, not to wait on their tables for them.
He would never be able to prove himself to his father if he with his uncle, hidden within the walls of Ba Sing Se. Azula gave him a chance to finally regain his honor and maybe be thought of something other than a complete waste to their father. It made perfect sense for him to have chosen the path he did, and yet there was a heavy feeling upon his shoulders that he couldn't shrug off.
Perhaps it was because to follow this path he had to betray his uncle, the one person who had always had faith in him even in his darkest hours. He never wanted to do such a thing to the man who he cared for. He wished there could have been another way that would save Iroh from being imprisoned. But he found himself just as helpless as when his mother disappeared. Stuck wanting to do something, anything yet capable of nothing.
He promised himself to make it up to Uncle when he finally reclaimed his place in the royal hierarchy and once again had the power to change things. He is sure his caring and understanding uncle Iroh would see that his choice was the right one in the end and that it was all worth it. He would just have to wait until then and everything will be fine again like it once was many years ago. All it would take was for him to prove to his father that he was a worthy son.
His conscience finally rested at ease for moment before the memories of his past returned. Childhood games with Azula where he would lose by breaking a rule she didn't tell him about and scornful looks from his father when he didn't measure up to expectations that he never told him of. Zuko shook his head to banish them away. They were the past, things were different now, he had changed, he was strong now. He had changed and that would change everything.
He turned over to try to find sleep again but it kept eluding his grasp as the doubts he had tried to push away only festered as the weight of his decision finally began to hit him.