For all those touched by it,
The ones in need of it,
And all the people who deserve it.
Love.
Playing Notes
Can't you hear me playing?
You say I'm an amazing person.
That, whoever I go for will fall head over heels for me.
But you're wrong.
You tell me, if you really love someone you should tell them.
But your kindness drowns any words that I say.
You treat me like the most trusted of friends, sharing your worries,
Your darkest thoughts, to me.
Because you know I won't betray you.
You put me in so much pain.
But I love you too much to say anything.
You deserve someone amazing, you really do.
It'll never be me though.
Why can't you see me?
I'm right behind you, beside you like a shadow.
But you're distracted by someone else.
I don't want to hurt you,
I only wish for your happiness,
But I'm only human.
So I can't help getting a little jealous.
The only way I've found, to deal with constant pain,
Is to find something to hold, and get back up again,
Because if I let myself go,
Distance myself from you,
And try to move on,
I'm not sure what I'd do.
Stay with me,
Let me stay and be a part of your life,
Even if our fates never intertwine,
Its ok,
Its ok,
I'm fine,
I'm ok,
Oh, the lies we say.
You tell me that I'll meet someone soon,
That they'll be the one for me,
That I'll fall in love and get married, have kids.
Someone who I can depend on, and grow old with.
How can you be so cruel?
Can't you see I've fallen for someone already?
Fallen, for you?
Can't you hear me playing?
Music in the background, like a constant companion.
I'm playing the music
Just like a dog whose love binds it to its master.
Who said love is easy?
Watching as you fall for another and get your heart broken?
Comforting for, being there for you.
Always.
This is torture for me.
Why can't you see yourself like I do you?
Please don't do this to yourself.
Don't talk yourself down.
Don't beat yourself up.
Don't-
I can't even imagine my life without you in it.
You make me smile, you make me laugh.
You know me like no other.
You walk with me, talk with me and get so hurt by another.
You say 'I love you. You're my best friend.'
But I'm so in love with you,
Can't you see I'm hurting, being here with you?
When we get old, I want to die first.
Knowing that you're happy.
That the person you love, whoever it is, returns your love tenfold.
Who treats you better than I ever could.
Who loves you more than I could ever show.
Who lives out their life knowing they have to have you in it.
Who makes sure you're safe,
Who protects you as best as they can,
Who hugs you, and holds you late at night
And when you need them they're there.
Because I can't.
Because you don't love me, and you never will.
So I'll keep playing them.
The sad, sweet notes of second fiddle.
Always in the background to the first.
This wasn't supposed to be a happy fic.
For my friends, my family, I love you all.
Please just remember to be happy.
Smile.
Life is beautiful.
-Akiko