Adam Foster walked around his apartment. Supergirl had just carried Fort Roz into space, sacrificing her life. The brunette in media went out to his balcony, distraught. Sitting down on the lounge chair, he noticed a hole in the solid concrete. Curious, Adam looked closer. Thrust into the floor was a leather journal.
It was slightly wet, evidence to support that it had been there for a while, at least four hours (the last rain). Some of the pages were missing, but it had beautiful handwriting scrawled on the parchment pages. Adam opened to the first page and began to read.
February 4, 2007
My foster mom gifted me with this notebook to write down what I please. On Krypton, my mother used to write down her experiences as a young girl to share with her future daughter, me. My foster sister suggested to use it to write notes. I will use it as both. In the event that I am about to do something extremely dangerous in the future, or my secret is revealed, I will bestow this journal to someone I care about. If you are reading this, you have been chosen, or have stolen this. If is it the latter, put it down or I will force you back into the hole you crawled out of.
School today was awful. My sister had to stay home sick and I went without her. I was shoved into my locker and had to stay there until lunch. I easily could have gotten out, but I had to stay put, keeping my secret. I was at the pick up line when my foster mom came to pick me up. She recognized my mood so we enjoyed ice cream at Barney's. I felt so much better; earth food in general (besides broccoli) tends to do that for me.
At home, I walked along the beach. I could hear cries of help coming from in town, even with the glasses my foster dad made me on. I was desperate to help; it was only an office fire, after all. As a fourteen year old, new to earth, I stayed put. The fire department answered the call, saving almost everyone. I could have saved everyone. I will remember their cries forever.
As I lay awake in bed, I think of Krypton. It was such a beautiful place, the red sun overhead, the red rocks outside the city. I miss it so much. Some days I cry myself to sleep, remembering my family. Kal El left me here and left me. I miss him so. He may not be a baby now, but I held him as a one. He was so small, so cute, so innocent. It is my hope that someday I can be just like him: strong, brave, loving, powerful.
Shocked, Adam closed the journal. 'This was Supergirl's journal!' He thought. 'Why is it here? Where is she? Maybe it says in the book. I have to keep reading.'
March 6, 2008
Today, I failed a test in school. I know all the answers; it was just so hard because of the pencil tapping, the talking down the block, and the view of everyone's skeleton. Lead only helps so much, but I wear them for Jeremiah now.
He died in a plane crash two days ago. My family is still grieving. I did not know him very long, but he welcomed me and loved me as his own from the moment Kal left me here. If I had never flown, he would still be alive. It is all my fault. I swear to Rao, I will protect my family, no matter what it takes. If it is a Kryptonite bullet, I will allow myself to be hit rather than anyone else. I could have saved Jeremiah, if I weren't stuck here playing human. No one at school likes me anyways. I am always called the 'Weird New Girl' and other names. My earth sister tells me to just ignore them, but I cannot. I cannot fight back; I cannot protect her from the bullying that comes to her because of me. She punched a kid, because I could not.
Adam sat back, looking up at the sky for National City's hero. Here he was, reading this journal like he had a right to. Surely Supergirl left it here for him, right? It was on the balcony of his apartment, his balcony, in a hole that was not there before. On the other hand, it was clearly an older book. The moist peeling pages were not a new reading and there were scorch marks on some of the pages. Ever curious, Adam continued to read.
July 12, 2009
I have not written in a while, it is the fourth anniversary of my arrival on earth and in two days, I will be leaving high school for bigger things. My foster mother helped me apply to a college nearby, and I was accepted. I am excited to leave, and I hope it will not be like high school.
In happier news, an earth boy asked me to go steady with me. On Krypton, he would have needed to ask my father for permission, but there is no tradition like that here for courtship. Before our first date, my earth sister opened the door and spoke softly to him, but I still heard her threaten him. Before I even got down the stairs, he was speeding down the road in his truck. So much for a love life.
I do not know why I had hoped to have a romance on earth. I cannot be with a human; the only ones I have hugged are Kal, his human girlfriend (Lois), my foster sister, and my foster mother. Sometimes, I wish things were different, but they cannot be.
Lois is like a big sister to me, not as great as Alex, but still like a sister. She and Kal will likely get married. Living in Metropolis, Lois and Kal spend so much time together. Just yesterday, he told her that he is Clark and Superman. She had been seeing him at work and on rooftops. I found it hilarious; she did not.
Their relationship gives me hope. Hope that someday, I will find romantic love. Both sets of my parents had it, and their parents before them. As much as I would love that, it is so dangerous. Lois and her son have been hurt and kidnapped so many times by those hoping to get a hit in on Superman. Luckily, Jason has some of his father's abilities to save the two. I know I could never have a child, even if I were to have a husband.
Adam's heart broke. He had no idea how difficult Supergirl's human lifestyle was for her. Completely enthralled, the boy kept reading.
May 27, 2014
I am sorry I have not written recently, I guess journal keeping is not easy when you are an undercover alien. I just graduated and I was hired to be a personal assistant. College on scholarship was amazing and meant I could put my wages to an apartment of my own.
It turns out my powers come in handy. I was able to get the job by using them. I told her the pen was out of ink, discovered by my x-ray vision. I can heat my boss' coffee with my heat vision and get anywhere within minutes for her. I am remaining more human than Kryptonian for a while. I do not ever plan on being like my cousin. The world already has Superman; why would they need me? Would I be Superwoman? I have seen Clark's life, chaos and lies. He cannot catch a break. Right now, the world needs me to blend in.
Supergirl ripped the next page out, probably, but Adam was still captivated by this window into Supergirl's private life. He could not fathom that she had chosen him to gift with this journal as he continued to read.
October 25, 2015
Today, I signed up for a dating website. Not as a Kryptonian, of course, but using my human identity. My sister finally coaxed me into it. Within a minute, I had an invitation to a bar in National from a guy. I was conflicted, but elected to go met him tomorrow night. Alex and I watched Homeland and ate pizza for the remainder of the evening.
Sorry there is not much to write, it was Saturday and I rarely do much on Saturdays.
Adam smiled, thinking about how normal Supergirl seemed. It was hard not to love her from this depiction of her. She seemed so normal, like a traumatized child who was slightly geeky and not accepted by her peers.
October 26, 2015
Today, I went to work like any normal day. I carried my boss's coffee into the office and smiled at my best friend. He came over, smiling. He asked me to go to a movie later, and I did not know it at the time, but he was asking me out on a date. I said I was going on a date and may have crushed his spirits for the rest of the day.
I stood by my desk, listening for the shrill sound of my boss' voice. Pretty soon I heard her coming up in her elevator and alerted him. He once again questioned how I do that and I just smiled. The day was not a bad one.
My boss asked me to go get layouts from the new art director, so I complied. I found he was my cousin's best friend and a Pulitzer winning photographer. What are the odds, right?
While he worked, I found a photograph of my cousin as Superman. I smiled and the man said it was to be mine. It went on my wall as soon as I got home. I called my foster sister for dating tips and she helped me chose an outfit. I wound up wearing a tan coat and all black ensemble. Alex got on her flight to Geneva and I had to go meet this guy at a club in town.
I never felt like we were connecting, seems he did not either. A fake phone call was all it took for him to leave and ask the waitress for her number. I did not have much time to be bitter as a television in the room alerted me to a plane dealing with difficulties. I recognized it as the flight my sister was on. I ran out of the restaurant, ready to do anything to protect her. In an alley, I managed to take flight and flew towards the plane. I caught it and landed it. Tired, I flew to my apartment. I was overjoyed when I saw the news reporting on a 'mysterious flying woman.' Unfortunately, my human sister was not so happy. She was mad, without proper reason. I was disappointed, thinking my family did not believe in me.
Adam leaned back in his chair. He did not even notice his mother coming in the door of his apartment and the young man continued to read.
January 29, 2016
Today, I sent a letter to the son of my boss. She had written so many, yet refused to send one. As nice as she is, I decided she needed happiness with her family. He called her today. The two are going to meet in a few days.
I was called into my boss' office. She was furious and yelled at me, but I know how happy this will make her. I can take her yelling, it makes me mad, of course, but flying helps me release some anger.
Adam laughed, thinking about how his mom can drive people crazy as Supergirl described. He had not connected the dots that Supergirl and Kara Danvers are the same person.
January 31, 2016
I woke up late this morning and dragged Alex to the coffee shop with me. As we waited for the coffee orders, I met a human male. He said my boss could be a pain, so I defended her. He was so cute.
At the office, I saw the young man again. Apparently, he was her son. The two decided to meet for dinner that night and I was so happy they were attempting to connect. He asked me out before leaving and I was conflicted. It could not last, but I really like him. If I want someone to be my Lois, it will be him. Well, you know what I mean.
February 2, 2016
Yesterday, I went on my date with the brunette. He is so sweet and I feel bad for lying to him. I like him so much and, unlike my last date, I was enjoying myself when I had to leave on Supergirl business.
Today, we tried again. It was getting dark as we walked back. Maxwell Lord decided to have his minion attack me as a human and I was forced to fight her. I did not kill Bizzaro; I never had any intention to. The whole incident brought all my fears back into the light. Since Maxwell Lord knew my human identity, no one I love would ever be safe from him.
I flew to his mom's building and changed quickly. He was inside and I had to leave him. He deserved better, someone who could be honest, someone who did not put him in danger with every hug. And so I broke up with him.
As I lay in bed and cry, I know I can never love him. I still do though. He makes my heart fly without the rest of me. Each time he smiles I want to smile, too. He is just that kind of guy.
Adam smiled, feeling as though he knew Supergirl as his mother cooked in his apartment. He still had no idea she was at his house.
April 17, 2016
Today, I fought against my uncle and my sister. Non is evil. Astra I had hope for, but I know Non will never change. His cohort brainwashed my sister and attempted to make her kill me. I would not, I could not kill her. We faced off until she was saved from Indigo's mental grasp.
It was heart breaking to fight Alex. It was as though we were teens again, fighting again. We had gotten past that part of our lives and I fear we may never get past this. I know what it is like to watch your family members almost die, but to be the one whose body is used, terrorizing.
I realized today whom I want to give this notebook to. If I die today, fighting for Earth, I want you to know one thing, Adam Foster. I have been close to you. Quite close. I feel it is only right that you know who I am.
My secret identity is…
Adam's heart skipped a beat. In plain and simple pen ink, the name that would reveal so much was scribbled over. The use of the pen was rushed, not by Supergirl. It was probably by Alex or someone else close to the hero.
The young man had not forgotten about the notebook, but placed it back in the hole before walking inside to meet his mother.