Hello y'all, I was bored and decided to write something. I wrote this poem in about two hours. Dovewing is one of my least favorite characters so this is basically a whole ballad of roasts for Dovewing and her stuck-up, Mary Sue personality. If you like Dovewing, get a life and read the true story of Dovewing. If you don't like Dovewing, enjoy!

The Dovewing Poem!

I'm the specialest of the 3,

So you must, bow to me,

I run to my mommy when there is strife,

But that's not important, let's hear the story of my life!

When I was a kit, I told the clan

I smelled fire! We needed a plan

And that's when Lion brought our water

To put out the fire, before the fire could slaughter

Ivy and I were made apprentices

And that's when I knew I had nemeses

When I became a hero because of the drought

She was jealous of me and started to go all out

She hated and swore, went to the dark

And met a sexy tom, oh StarClan, it was a spark

In her boring, dead life, it was too good to be true

She didn't know the tom, she didn't have a clue

Really, she's stupid! She never would've known

That a tom died on the journey, to protect me and my home

She also wouldn't have known that I met my own tom

He's the smartest guy in the world, he's a frickin' hot bomb

Yeah, now back to me, I'm the best, I was busy

With my clan, with my training, with the whole darn prophecy!

Well, not really, I dragged Ivy to WindClan in the night

Just to see Sedge but Ivy thought we were going to get in a fight

But we didn't! Ha, she's wrong! I don't care we got caught

I was right, and she was not!

I saved the clan's tails, AGAIN, with that whole tree-falling craze

Well, I didn't save Longtail or Briarpaw, anyways

But then I fought against ShadowClan

And saw my sister receive a nod from my man

What the Dark Forest? How does he know her?

I'm jealous, since I'm the best, and she's just a burr

After that, I found out about Ivy's tom, and her training

She says she'll be a better warrior, her excuses are entertaining

She's training with evil cats! She's not going to be better

Sure, she'll try, but to honest, she will never

Be as good as me

I'm the best, clearly

I know that there'll be no trouble between her and Tiger

Cause I met up with him that night, he's a fighter

He's strong, and he's handsome, we agreed to meet again

I know I'm in love with him, he's one of the better men

And I also know Ivy's bitter because she tells me

Tiger's in her evil forest, like he'd ever be!

He's too kind, too nice, too fun to ever go

To that smelly little forest, but if he did, I would know

The next night, I met him again

And he told me about the med cat, he's sick in his den

With greencough! I told him about our catmint

But then Ivy found us, she didn't give a hint

Of what she was up to, that sneaky she-cat!

She's my sister, she can trust me, no clue why she didn't do that

ShadowClan captured her while I was safe under a bush

And they will only give her back if we give them the catmint, StarClan knows they can push!

I knew Tiger was bad, I was just playing along

So I could see what he was up to, he's just very strong

I pretended to be in love with him so I could get all the info

He's honestly just horrible, worse than a slippery minnow

I got my warrior name, now I'm called Dovewing

I saved Ice during my assessment, I'm better than anything

I'm gonna get a new mate, because Bumble is nice

But then Tiger says he loves me, ugh, he's worse than lice!

I hate him so much, so I'm glad when I leave

To go to the mountains with Jay, Squirrel, and Foxleap

But then Swoop of Chestnut Hawk is carried off by an eagle

That's gotta be illegal

I have nightmares for a moon, and plus my powers are gone!

Oh no, I'm 'normal', let me kill myself at the dawn!

But I learn Bumble likes me, oh he's great

Until Blossom sticks her muzzle in, she's now filled with hate

But I uncover my feelings for Tiger, stronger than before

I know I love him more than Bumble, I need to get to him, I need more

But then that no good Sol

Is being a horrible mole

For WindClan, they just want a fight

Ivy and I hear him in the tunnels, but then we don't have a sight

Of the light from above, we're lost, when Holly

Guides us back to the top, I couldn't have been more jolly

But Lion and Jay seem to have different views

Jay doesn't want Holly but Lion will refuse

To send her back to the tunnels, he loves her

Why is this so confusing? Holly's sturdier than a fir

Like during the battle with WindClan and the traitor Sol

She put his claws to his throat and tells him to roll

She won't hesitate to kill him if he shows up again

I get bad feelings from him, I can't wait for him to be dead

Ivy's getting moody, I think she likes her forest

Maybe she wants to stay, I can tell she's the sorest

She's learning new fighting moves, waking up with a bloody pelt

To me, she's a traitor, to others, she's a heart-melt

Especially to that sexy, dark tom, with those eyes that are ice blue

She seems to like him so much, I have the feeling they want to screw

After that Jay tells that there's a fourth

I'm so mad, why does StarClan have to put forth

Another cat? She might be better than me

Jay thinks of Moth but Lion thinks it's Holly

I think it's Ivy, but I don't want it to be true

Ivy will try to be better than me, and definitely make a fool

Of herself! I can't stand to have a sister as stupid as her

So I'm not telling, but I'm hoping that she won't be a saboteur

Then Tiger finds me, tells me to meet him at the border

I reluctantly agree, but inside, my heart's out of order

I want to meet him again, I missed him so much,

That night I'm really in a rush

I meet him up and we race together

In those past few days, I had never felt better

I suggest he come to ThunderClan and we have kits

But Tiger is reluctant, and settles for a kiss

When we go to the Gathering, I snap at Bumble

Later I apologize but with a rumble

He rejects me, I'm not used to that

My heart is torn in two, I wish he'd go splat

No one rejects the best of the best

And gets away with it, until they become a big mess

But when I told my Clanmates about my powers

Tiger told that he overheard, and I see he's no delicate flower

He's a ShadowClan cat and a Dark Forest warrior

Not my mate, not my love, he makes me so much warier

Of my surroundings, of my past, so I break up with him

I'm loyal to my Clan, to the Three, he's just a sin

But when I fight in the battle, I see Tiger fighting for the clans

He tells me he spied like Ivy, because he's a good man

I'm relieved, I can love him, he's not evil after all

Ivy was wrong, I was right, it would be a victory for us all!

Firestar's on his last life, but he still fights Tigerstar

The evil tom is defeated, and Firestar goes up in a spark

Of lightning when it strikes and causes flames

He was a true warrior and his spirit will be among the many names

That died for their clans, the good cats that they are

Of course, when I die, I'll get my own star

Because I'm the best of the best

Obviously better than the rest

The battle's won and done, so I lost my powers, oh no!

I'm 'normal', I'm not a pro

There's a new prophecy, not concerning me

How could StarClan do this! They can't possibly

Forget about Dovewing, better than the rest

I know I should've been the leader all after this

I saved the clans' tails from destruction and darkness

How do they repay me? With nothing, they're so heartless

On top of that, I think Tiger hates me now

He hisses at me, I refuse to bow

And pretend I don't love him

I'm not that dim

When ShadowClan comes to live with us

He becomes cuddly and warm and I know I must

Be with him, make him my mate

Until Bumble hits on me, I know him I hate

I can't stand his clumsy compliments

Tiger's much better, he's not incompetent

I'm carrying his kits, I have to leave

Because of nightmares, I can't be pleased

He doesn't want to leave, so I leave on my own

I'm strong by myself, but I'm no longer alone

Because he finally catches up to me

I'm with the guardian cats, I'm finally free

I give birth to Shadow, Pounce, and Light

They're all so adorable, they always fight

Alright, I know, Lightkit is dark brown

Which is the opposite of her name, I can tell you have a frown

But only my opinion counts, so ha! I don't care

If you hate her name, I'll just go and give you a scare

Shadow knows everything

He's never been to the forest, but he's seen

Visions of the trees, and even Ivy

Who had her own kits, I want to see them now

And tell her that my kits are better than hers, but how

Did she get a mate that actually cares for her

Was it that sexy dark tom from the shadows that will deter

Everything she's worked for

Just for kits and more galore?

We travel back to the clans

Shadow tells us of the land

He describes the lake and the moor

And tells us that the clans aren't poor

In prey or water, they're fine, they're okay

I tell Tiger that I'll go to ShadowClan to stay

He becomes the next leader, I'm proud of him

I've got a leader for a mate! I'll never be grim

Because that will show Ivy how I'm so much better

'Cause I've got Tiger for a mate, and all she's got is a little feather

His name is Fernsong and he's kind and caring

I thought it would be Hawk, they could get drunk together on some Twoleg sherry

Just the type of thing they would do, but I keep my mouth shut

But I tell her I'm going to live with ShadowClan, she's says, "Stay with us..."

I'm really surprised, I know I wouldn't miss her at all

But she's going to miss me? Wow, I'm probably still hotter than a fireball

I'm living with my Tiger, but again I've gotta think

How I was the best of the three, even the others had a few chinks

Jay is being shipped with a stick

That stupid stick is bigger than his prick

Lion really wanted Cinderheart

But I know why she wouldn't take him, he'd always fart

When he slept in the warriors' den all night

It's a wonder she finally accepted him and they never had a fight

You know, let's include Firestar

He broke the code so many times, no wonder he has so many scars

And how ironic is it that he was killed by fire

I guess his name didn't like being plastered on a liar

He chose the one who hates him for his mate

Had two lying daughters, that's just great

Those daughters had med cats for their kits

Spottedleaf wants a destiny through them, instead of having fits

About how Fire rejected her and she went up to StarClan

Without him, her love, the one who was supposed to be her man

Now you see how imperfectly

The others behaved...what about me?

You don't have to say it, I know you love Dovewing

Well, thanks everyone, and bye-bye kitties!