My Name
Shingeki no Kyojin (c) Isayama Hajime
Rivaere
OOC, yaoi, swearing, death-character
I was a corporal, someone who had dignity and strict personality.
But then again, I was just a mere human.
A man.
Who could fall in love.
Even the object was weak and annoying as hell.
But I don't hate him; in contradiction, I like him.
Or love?
I do not even know the different.
His name was Eren.
Eren Jaeger.
Green eyes, tanned skin, a fucking brat.
A brat who was taller than me.
That's why I called him 'fucking-brat'.
We all lived in a dangerous world.
We here referred to "me and others".
Titans lived in our world too. They were out there. Waiting us. Waiting to eat us, tear us into pieces, swallow us, torture us.
Not that I was afraid.
I never felt afraid.
But then again, we all were human who could die easily.
Every fucking time before I went out there, that 'fucking-brat' and I would spend the night together, in my room to be exact.
We would fuck.
He transformed whenever we did this; from "fucking-brat" into "sexy-brat".
We fucked.
I would make him mine. And he did not mind at all.
I did this and that, and he moaned.
I fucked him.
Kissed his lips, licked his collar bone, teased his nipples, swallowed his essence whenever he came.
Did everything I wanted. Because every fucking night before we went out there, he was mine. Completely.
His mind, his body, his soul. All of them were mine.
The words that he knew whenever we did that were "faster","don't stop","i am coming", and my favorite word...
My name.
He would call me "Levi".
Without heichou, or any addition like he always used when we were not fucking each other.
He would scream my name shamelessly.
"Levi".
We fucked each other.
Kept doing that until he lost his consciousness.
And when it happened, I would hold him close before I closed my eyes.
I did not sleep, but I closed my eyes.
Feeling all of him.
Feeling what's mine.
The morning came so fast.
I opened my eyes and there he was.
Staring at me with that annoying stare. His eyes opened widely, fear showed perfectly. I knew he was scared.
I knew.
And the next thing I did was kissing him.
Without my tongue, or lust.
Just a simple-good-morning kiss.
He would blush.
That 'fucking-brat' was pretty cute.
We were out.
My comrades died; not that I was sad.
I was just feeling empty.
But definitely not sad.
That fucking-brat and I were trapped. Many titans surrounded us. Many. Thirty. Forty? I'd lost my count. It was not like I was scared or what. I did not care. I was not scared.
Had I told you before that I was strong?
So yeah, I was not scared.
But that fucking-brat was scared.
After seeing his... I meant 'our' comrades died, he lost his balance.
He broke.
He loved that special two persons. Not the way like he loved me of course, but they were important.
What was his name again? Armin Arlert? And who that annoying girl who hated me so much? Mikasa Ackerman?
He was scared.
He tried to bite his hand, every fucking minutes. But he failed. Blood oozed from his biting mark, he did not seem to care at all. He kept biting it, until I tugged his hand harshly and forced his eyes to meet mine. He stared. So did I.
I was asking him to believe me.
He was scared.
He grabbed my coat. His hand trembled.
That's why I did not like brats. They were fucking weak.
My heart thumped. Never felt that before.
I told him to stand behind me; not beside me.
So that I could protect him with all I've got.
But he refused and kept standing beside me, keeping his fighting-pose even though he trembled like an idiot.
He really broke.
I got mad.
Before I could scold him, one titan approached us.
I slew it easily.
And then titans kept attacking us.
Two, three, then four.
I killed them all.
Five, six, seven.
I killed them all.
I was too busy with my mind.
I was too busy to protect him.
I was too naive.
The last thing I heard from his lips was my favorite word.
My name.
"LEVI!"
And then a miserable cry filled the damp air.
I knew I failed.
We were not fucking each other and he called my name.
My name.
My favorite word.
That was when I knew, something was definitely wrong.
I turned my head back to see that fucking-brat's body went limp. Ah, sorry. I meant half of his body.
Half dead-body.
I saw red.
I did kill all of those titans.
I did kill them.
But then again, I knew I failed.
He was still there. Lying on the ground with a weird position. His eyes were not close, but his focus was nowhere to be found. I walked towards him.
Slowly.
Too slow that it started killing me.
My heart beat so fast. Too fast that it hurt.
"I like heichou the most!" Eren smiled widely.
I stared at him with my bored expression and responded with a single "Hm".
"I...love Levi the most." He then whispered. I heard him, but pretended that I did not catch that. He was not disappointed. He never asked anything in return He kept smiling and staring at me with his green orbs.
He knew that I was not the type who would say that three-magic-words.
I did not have to kneel down to check him; to check whether he was still alive or dead. Whether he still had a goddamn pulse or not.
I didn't have to.
I knew I was too late.
It was only 3 steps left; 3 steps to embrace him.
I wanted to embrace him. Burying my hair into his soft locks. Nipping his neck.
But I did not.
I was too naive.
I turned my back and left.
Left his body.
One year had passed.
One year after that fucking-brat died.
Died.
I forbade people calling me by name. I forbade them all.
I forbade them to say my favorite word.
The only one who could say that was him.
That brat.
Eren Jaeger.
My name.
.
.
FIN
A/N: I wrote it in my culture test. Some grammatical errors? Spare me. Not my mother-tongue. This fic was inspired by a fic about GrimIchi (bleach fandom hell yeah). But of course different plot. And if you find any similarities, spare me again. I didn't know. Honestly.