Wishes
The shattered pieces of Ziva's soul were scattered around her feet like broken glass, wordlessly begging for someone (anyone) to pick them up and glue them back together. A cold, hollow numbness had taken up residence in her soul, hiding her from the rest of the world, forcing back the tears that she wanted to let spill. Her heart was like some sort of poison in her chest, always throbbing and burning.
Memories of There (that's what she had taken to calling it in her mind, where her thoughts currently swirled like a raging whirlpool) bubbled through her veins like acid, a liquid fire that she could not put out. Dark thoughts ran amok in her brain, urging her in persuasive whispers to simply give up. She had lost count of how many times she had wanted to listen, wanted to fall to her knees and beg for death to come and take her away.
Every faked smile and every happy word burned her lips. Every time they believed it sent an ache into her bruised and battered bones, sinking past her skin and into the swirling abyss beneath. Sometimes she wanted to scream until her lips bled and her throat was raw, simply so they would see that she was not fine. But a mist had cloaked her skin and left her standing there, shivering and alone, wishing for complete freedom from the pain. Not all wishes came true, and her wish was one of them.
Kate was the only one who seemed to be able to part the mist like a curtain, peering in and seeing the true Ziva. Always she was reaching out, giving Ziva a hand to hold when she felt that no one was there, chasing away the sinister thoughts that leaked into her mind. She had found a map into Ziva's soul by following the scars that decorated her skin like a work of art gone gruesomely wrong.
During the nights when the pain and memories would wrap around Ziva like a cloak, smothering her and trying to make her forget even herself (as if she had not already), Kate was there to pull it away. She had the key to the cage that had trapped Ziva's heart, the ability to melt the hardness of her soul into nothing but a distant memory. Her fingers would run through Ziva's hair as if she were unknotting the dark secrets that haunted her until they disappeared, holding her close as she cried.
The first kiss they shared was hard to describe—perfect, something raw and new. Eight kisses and two 'I love you, and I'll never leave you's' later, Ziva was relearning the word 'trust' and everything that it meant. Kate took the shattered pieces into her hands, ignoring the cuts they caused. She brought her to life like music made by fingers dancing across piano keys.
Pieces would always remain scattered across the world, far out of reach. They would float away like paper butterflies on the wind, impossible to catch. Ziva would never be truly whole again, and agonizing memories would still run like blood from the wounds that were painted on her skin. But Kate would be there to seal them with kisses and comforting whispers.
Maybe not all wishes came true, but Ziva had Kate to pull her out of the fathomless ocean. And that was enough.
This is entirely un-beta'd, so sorry for any mistakes. Feel free to tell me about them so I can fix them.
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