Author's note! Hello everyone! So there's a thing on YouTube called Video Game Confessions which is owned by Doug Walker (aka ). On Video Game Confessions a bar tender called Dominick tells his stories of what he's heard from popular game characters. I love this show but I couldn't help noticing that he hadn't done many Mario characters. He has done Mario, Daisy and Donkey Kong but no other Mario characters. So I wrote my own version of Bowser Jr's side of the story. I don't own Video Game Confessions but please don't sue me for copyright, I'm just having a little fun here writing a story and Doug, if you're reading this, I would love it if you put this into video form, but you know, you don't have to. Here we go!

I think, for the sake of the newbies, we should start with the traditional opening.

This is Dominick. Dominick works at a five star restaurant called, The Pixel Palace. There, some of gaming's most popular characters pop in to have a drink. Sometimes, they share stories and even secrets. Because as we all know, what the bartender hears is confidential. Isn't it?

So I'm sitting there, tending bar, when in walks a guy who looks like he's just been beaten into next Sunday, Bowser Jr. He sits down and orders a lemonade and lime (obviously he's still young so he doesn't drink yet). I mean, he looked totally wrecked. His clothes were ripped, and he had a number of scars. So I make him is drink and I notice he's looking very down so I ask him. "Hey BJ! What's up?"

He sighs and looks at me. "I got beaten up by Mario again," he says.

"Oh, that's not good," I say.

"Of course it's not good!" he yelled slamming his fist on the table spilling half of his drink everywhere. "It really hurt. And getting sympathy from Papa is hard enough, but just after Mario had defeated him it's downright impossible," he says.

He looked angry as well as upset; I knew there was more to the story than that.

"So, is that the problem then, you're fed up of your Dad being so unsympathetic?" I ask him.

He sighs again. "Not exactly," he says. "You see, I've become a pacifist."

"A paci-what?" I ask.

"Someone who hates violence," he replies.

"You hate fighting?" I ask.

He nods.

"But that'll never work!" I say. "You're Bowser's son!"

"That's what Mario said," he replies sighing. "Every single time he challenges me to a fight, I try to back out of it. 'I'm not a violent person' I say. 'I don't want to fight, I'm just a kid' But he's having none of it," he indicates his scars. "He just beats the hell out of me."

"That's terrible," I say. "What are you gonna do?"

"Well, I told Papa," he said.

"OK, and how did that go?" I ask.

He looks at me like I'm an idiot. "How do you think?" he asks me. "Papa's the Lord of evil and all that stuff so when I told him I was against fighting, he hit the roof."

"So what did you do?" I ask him. "Are you gonna take up fighting then?"

"Are you kidding?" he says. "Making a living out of something I disagree with, morally just because Papa wants me to? I'd rather die."

"So what did you do?" I ask.

He sighs. "We had an argument," he says. "Papa eventually got so mad he said I wasn't his son."

"That's tough," I say. "What did you do?"

"I stormed out," he says. "And came here." He sighs and looks at his empty glass. He orders another lemonade and lime. "Might as well," he says. "I'm not going back home."

"So where are you going?" I ask. I mean, as much as I like the guy, he can't exactly stay in the Pixel Palace forever.

He shrugs. "On the street," he says. "I was thinking of doing a bit of busking."

I tell you, the thought of this little kid making himself homeless deliberately was sad, so, so sad.

Suddenly, Bowser Jr's eldest brother, Ludwig walks in.

"Yo, little bro!" Ludwig says. They high-five and he sits down next to him and orders a cherryade.

"I thought I'd find you here," Ludwig says to his brother. "Something's really going down back at home."

"I can imagine," Junior says remembering his argument with Bowser.

"No, no, not that," Ludwig corrects. "Something else, you see…" he leans over to whisper in Junior's ear. "Turns out, Roy's gay."

"Huh," Junior says. "But Ludwig, its 2014, being gay isn't really shocking anymore."

"Well Father was pretty shocked," Ludwig says. "He shouted at him until he was hoarse. Well poor Roy was dumbfounded but I felt like I had to stick up for him so I shouted back. I said that if he wouldn't accept his son for what he was, then we would leave him."

"Wow," Junior says.

"Yeah," Ludwig agrees. "We almost did too, until Father weakened and said that he would accept us for who we were."

"So… does that mean I can come home then?" Junior asks.

Ludwig nods. "As long as you're not into bestiality!" he jokes.

Junior threw his drink in his face.

"Sorry," Ludwig apologizes. "Bad joke, I know."

So they pay for their drinks, and walk out the door. That was nice, a proper happy ending. That was until a week later when Luigi walked in and announced that Bowser was looking into adopting a new son that wasn't a pacifist wimp. Some people will never change. You see a lot of strange things as a bartender; you see a lot of strange things at the Pixel Palace. So, I see a lot of strange things as a bartender at the Pixel Palace, and that ain't no lie, swear to it.