These are not my characters. They belong to the author Janet Evanovich and thank you for letting us borrow them and run with our fantasies.

This story has my usual elements. Some funny mixed later with some wow surprises and fierce drama and you know it, some angst. I will make you uncomfortable. I was torn, but in the end made it a MM pairing for Steph and Babe's, this MM is a surprise and I made him hot! I can't make myself just let Ranger say he loves Steph and just give her to another guy, so I made him just a little bad. Also, You have read and heard about Lester's scary side. You will get a glimpse of it. It will eventually have a HEA ending. Hang with it. It is Cupcake and Helen neutral.

Set between JE's books 7 and 8 after the deal is made and prior to consummation of the deal.

Zetharin gets credit for reading my stuff and bouncing ideas with me.

Mandyh is my regular beta and is taking a summer break and was not available for this one so I got some help from a friend that likes to edit my stories for fun.

Special thanks to alix33 who is a wonderfully talented beta for all her help. You are fantastic!

NOTE-This story is NOT canon. The personalities of the characters are a little different.

Undercover Lover

Chapter 1

Stephanie's POV

I was on Stark Street chasing a skip without backup. If Ranger knew I was here and out of my car and on the street, he would be very upset with me right now. Stark street is the worst part of Trenton. Home to gangs, pimps, street walkers, dilapidated buildings and just generally people that don't want to be found and don't want to be messed with. The TPD doesn't even like to come here. I was hunting for a skip, an FTA. That is a person who got arrested and failed to appear on their court date. In other words, a bail jumper.

I heard a commotion in an alley a block down and ran toward it. Yeah, Ranger would really be pissed at this move. I peeked around the corner and it looked like four gangbangers were circling one guy with knives and ready to strike at him. I might be nutty to get in the middle of a gang fight, but I didn't think I could just stand still and watch four guys slaughter one man in cold blood with a good conscience. Ranger would be proud I had remembered to grab my gun out of my cookie jar on the way out of my apartment and it was loaded.

I pulled my gun and watched a minute. One of the gang members stepped sideways and the man in the middle of the circle locked eyes with me and I nodded at him. He gave them the come here motion with his hand and I watched in fascination as he relieved two of his attackers of their weapons and put them down with lightning speed and was going for the third. The fourth guy dropped his knife and pulled a Beretta out of the back of his pants and that's when I moved. "Drop your gun. Now!"

The man quickly knocked both men out and grabbed the beretta and my arm. He starting pulling me quickly out of the alley. "Where is your car?!" I pointed a couple blocks down. He spoke with an accent but his English was good. "I don't know what you're doing here pretty lady, but you need to leave now. Things are going to get bad here very shortly." I pointed to my Honda CRV. He let go of me and I clicked the door lock and opened the door and got in. He leaned in and grabbed the back of my hair and pulled my head back and gave me a panty smoking kiss and said, "Go now!" I watched him in my rearview mirror as I pulled away. He stood for a minute watching me drive away and then ran down the street, turned and was gone.

Holy Shit! What the hell just happened. My phone rang. "Lo?"

"Babe, what are doing on Stark?"

"Uh..Just some recon. Followed a skip here. I'm driving away right now."

"You have a skip from that area?"

"Nope. No way." I lied.

"We've talked about this before. My men don't even go to Stark without backup." He disconnected. We are going to have a serious talk about phone etiquette one of these days. He has big fat zero.

Ranger is my friend and bounty hunter mentor. When I accidently fell into fugitive apprehension working for my cousin Vinnie, his secretary and my high school friend Connie Rosolli had hooked me up with Ranger for some training and that's how we met. He helps me and protects me as best he can as I bungle my way through my job day to day and I think he might even really care about me deep down under that tough guy, rock hard, smokin' body with the...Wooo...Yowza...Hot flash here. I'm just sayin' it's not just me, women walk into doors and telephone poles when they get a look at him.

Well, crap. Guess I'm done for the day and I didn't get the pay check I was hoping for. It's dinner in the Burg again this week. I turned the car and headed that way.

My little chicken legged Grandma Mazur was standing at the door. Uncanny how she does that. She's always there to greet me when I arrive. "Hey Grandma, what's on the menu tonight?"

"Buster Bartucci. He was a wise guy you know. Well, they mostly called him a little sawed-off guinea. Wasn't but about five foot two with lifts. His nickname was "Legs", but not because of his legs. Rumor has it that they called him that because his ding-a-ling was as long as a third leg and me and Freeda are on a Clip and Curl mission and we have to verify that he's really packing. Freeda's got a camera on her cell phone..."

"Grandma...?"

"Yeah?"

"I meant, what's on the menu for dinner."

"Oh, hea..hea..hea. Spaghetti and meatballs and chocolate cheesecake. You're just in time." Just then my Mom came to the door and saw me and ran back toward the kitchen. What was that?

I said hello to my Dad who was in his recliner watching the news. "Hey Pumpkin." I plopped down on the couch and was about to ask Dad about the Philadelphia Eagle's new addition to the team when there was a knock and in walks Joe Morelli. Shit! So that's what my mother was up to. She ran in the kitchen to call Joe.

"Hey, Cupcake."

"Joe, I hope you're here just because you're hungry. I meant it when I said that I just want us to be friends."

"I thought we could talk after dinner."

"No. You and my mother thought we could talk after dinner. We broke up and I meant it when I said that I was tired of the back and forth crap and the loud arm waving arguments." He gave me an exasperated look and then my mother walked into the room. "I'm sorry that my mother keeps meddling."

She gave me a Burg glare. "Dinner is ready. Come on now before it gets cold." I sighed and got up and headed to the dining room. Joe sat down next to me and smirked at me.

I'm hungry. All I wanted was food. Why can I never come to my parents' house and just get a peaceful meal? Why? I groaned. We passed the spaghetti and the bread around and I was on my second bite when my mother started in.

"Joe has been asking about you and wanted to see you. I told him that I would call him the next time you came for dinner. He cares about you and I'm sorry if I care about my daughter and her future."

"Ugh..I can accept the last part of that statement. What I can't accept is you meddling in my personal life. This is the same conversation that we keep having. Joe and I don't agree on anything and we are unhealthy as a couple. Criminy, we don't want the same things! He wants to get married and I don't. He wants kids and I don't. He wants a knocked up, barefoot, Burg housewife and I'm never going to be that, MOM! Not for me. So stop cahooting with Joe. Joe and I are friends now and that is the end of it. Right Joe?"

Joe turned a glare on me. "So what? Are you with Manoso now?"

"Cripes, Joe! No. I am not and I resent that. You know he's my friend. Why can't I just be happy and single? When I date again, it'll be my choice and I'm going to ask both of you to butt out and mind your own beeswax."

"Stephanie Michelle Plum! How dare you talk to poor Joseph and myself this way!"

"Poor Joseph needs to get a life. He wants a wife and kids and he needs to go find someone who wants that and leave my uterus out of it!" Joe pushed his chair back. "Thank you Mrs. Plum. The dinner was delicious, but some of the company is foul." Then he stomped out of the kitchen.

"Don't let the door smack you in the ass on your way out Morelli," I threw at his back.

Grandma Mazur's little chicken neck had been whipping back and forth following the dinner conversation. She was grinning and looked like she was really enjoying herself. "Us single chicks should form a club. We could call ourselves The Sexy Singles or the Pink Pussycats or The Hooters and Hotties..."

My Dad muttered, "Gross. More like 'The Crazy Old Bat Shits'." With that I broke out into hysterical giggles. I looked over at my mother who had already downed her second shot of bourbon. My life is shit and my family is crazy and I'm broke and alone. How much worse can it get. Woohoo, I'm at rock bottom and I'm still kicking.

Joseph Morelli and I have a long history that goes back to our childhood and not a good one. It began with a game of dirty choo choo in his father's garage when I was six and then he took my virginity on the floor of the bakery where I worked when I was sixteen. Joe is a hot-blooded Italian stallion and I had let him seduce me into bed again after all these years after he ended up as one of my skips and I apprehended him and subsequently cleared his name and saved his job as a vice cop. The relationship was tumultuous and drove us both crazy and we spent more time off/again than on and I just didn't want to start again.

I finished my dinner and took my dessert and some leftovers to go and drove home. I put my leftovers in the fridge and said hello to Rex. He stopped riding his little wheel and wiggled his whiskers at me and went back to his roll. I fed him a little blueberry and headed to my bedroom. I dropped my clothes on the floor and changed into a big t-shirt and went to the bathroom and washed my face and brushed my teeth. I was staring at the dark ceiling thinking, I have twenty six bucks in the bank, four dollars in my wallet and my rent is due in two days. I groaned and pulled my pillow over my head and willed myself to go to sleep.

The next morning, I showered and rolled my Honda over to the bonds office.

"Connie, please tell me that you have a file for a crook that I can actually catch in the next two days."

"No luck yesterday?"

"Nope."

"You're in luck today. I have a couple skips you can probably handle."

"Thank you, thank you. I love you Con."

"I..know toots."

My nose was leading me over to a box of doughnuts close to where Lula was filing. My hand was heading inside the box when Lula's head snapped around. "You plan on keeping that hand, you better pull it back girlfriend." I giggled.

"I'm sorry Lula. I'm starving and I'm broke. You let me have one and you can go skip chasing with me today. You know you want to."

"Okay, you can have a couple. I can't have my girl going hungry. I'm bored with this filing. I'd rather be wrestlin' with some old fucker and shootin' shit up anyway."

Connie begged, "Please don't leave me alone you guys, I thought I heard a quack coming from Vinnie's office a while ago."

"Yuck! When he comes in, call animal control. Maybe they'll take him and leave the duck. Let's blow this barnyard stand Lula."

My cousin Vinnie is the pervert that owns Vincent Bail Bonds. Rumor has it that he has romantic flings with barnyard animals. That's one rumor that I hope will never come out of the barn..I mean closet.

When I got into my car, I looked at the two files. "Oh yeah, one is Dougie Kruper, Mooner's roommate. If we can't catch Dougie, we are losers. Let's head over there first."

"Speak for your..you got a point."

Dougie and Mooner are a couple mild-mannered stoners I went to highschool with. They live together, sometimes get into trouble and forget their court dates.

We knocked on the door and Mooner opened it. "Whoa, it's Steph and sidekick Lula. Come in man. Just settling down with a bowl of 'Fruity Pebbles' for an episode of Star Trek Next Generation. You wanna' join?"

"Sure Mooner. I need to talk to Dougie."

We walked into the living room and Dougie looked up. "Hey man, the bounty hunter chicks."

"Yes, and why exactly are we hunting you today Dougie?"

"Oh yeah that. I rolled a fattie in my car a couple weeks ago. Actually, it was too good. Next thing you know, my car is holdin' up a telephone pole. It was like a scene right out of "Up in Smoke" man. You couldn't see out the windows. It was radical. I think the cop that stopped to check on me and my car got pissed when he opened the door and got a gigantic toke of my car bong. It was actually kinda' cool. Never seen that before." Lula and I cracked up. I knew this was going to be good.

"Well Dougie, you know the drill. We have to take you to the station to get re-bonded. Don't forget your court dates dude."

"Didn't forget. That cop was so pissed he took my car. That was cruel and unusual."

"No. That's what they usually do. Finish your Trek episode and we'll go. I'll call Connie so you don't have to stay overnight in the pokey."

We dropped off Dougie at the TPD and headed to a Mcdonald's drive through for lunch. "Lula, how do you feel about going to Stark Street looking for a skip? I'm running out of time on this guy and Ranger gets pissed when I accept skips from there. I can't tell him I have it. I need the money."

TBC-

Sorry if the Grandma Mazur description of the deceased wise guy offended anyone.